BAEKHYUN

“Welcome back dear—oh, what’s with the atmosphere?” I see my mother eye the both of us as we enter. Saera kissed her on the cheek before taking Jongyul from her. “Eomonim, thanks for taking care of him while we’re away. I’ll take it from here you go rest.” She avoids my eyes again as I stood beside her.

I hate this feeling the most, not meeting her eyes and such. She just simply bowed to my mother before walking straight to the baby room, still with her shoulder bag with her. Now I’m left with my mother whose already giving me looks.

“What was that?” She asks. I knew by the looks of it, it’s obvious that I was on the bad side. My mother knows so well.

I’ve expected this the moment she arched her brow. “Nothing, just. . . a bit of argument.” I answer and my fingers automatically reach up to the side of my neck making a fake itch there to hide my frustration. “I thought it’s a date?” Eomma asks, she didn’t look pleased.

Who would? It’s been a while since we went out and this has to happen.

I was a bit careless of my words earlier, I never meant it. I didn’t say it’s none of her business but I just said it’s my business—gosh, even I can’t defend myself. It doesn’t feel right, I indeed messed up. “Thanks, Eomma. For taking care of Yullie. Did you eat lunch already? Do you want me to cook?” I change the topic as I start walking to the kitchen.

Not that I don’t want to fix it.

I just knew Saera might need some time to cool off.

“Son, I’ll go straight home. Fix this, please. There’s an infant with you now, this atmosphere isn’t nice for him.” I hear my mom retort back. I stop from my tracks and heave a deep sigh, trying to recover from the hardness around my chest that I’ve been having since earlier. “Okay, Eomma. Do you want me to drive you?” I ask as I turn.

 I try to force a smile just to be polite.

I feel annoyed at Saera getting angry of small things, causing her to nag and just talk non-stop.

But I’d rather be nagged at than be ignored by her.

“No, don’t worry. I’ll call a cab. Don’t leave your wife.” She rejected my offer and waved a hand at me before walking away just like that. I know she wanted me to take actions right away.

As soon as she left, I rush to the baby room. I arrive at the opened door and saw Saera at one corner on the low foam bed where she’s patting Jongyul to sleep. “Babe.” I call as I lean on the frame, with my hands on my pockets. “Don’t worry, I won’t ask anything about her again. It’s not my business anyway.” She answers back right away even before I could explain.

I get more frustrated.

Those guilt triggers she’s clicking, aiming at me.

And it’s bull’s eye.

“Look, are we really gonna fight about her? It’s not worth it, Jung Saera.” I grunt but I tried my best to sound as soft as possible. She finally stands up when our baby is completely drifted off. She walks to one side of the room again and picked up a few used baby towels, she started cleaning up. “Saera, please.” I try calling again. “Seriously, this is so low. Are you really going to ignore me just because we saw my ex-girlfriend?” I blurt out that made her look this time.

With the dirty towels on her hands, she walks to me with a firm expression. “It’s not even the case anymore.” She mutters, her voice sounded so hard that it terrifies me. “The moment I married you was the moment I gave everything, everything I had and could have. Every little thing I do, I tell you. But it seems like it’s one-sided.” She adds before walking out, even bumping our shoulders against each other.

I trail behind her, trying to reach for her arm.

“I said it’s not what I meant.” I finally manage to stop her from walking and twirl her around to face me. We already got out and now we’re standing by the middle of one hall. “Telling me how that girl hurt you in the past, I felt as if I was hurt by her too because I love you and then showing me such thing earlier? Am I suppose to. . . to greet her, hug her, chat with her too like nothing happened? Because I love you?” She asked.

Is it bad to really move on from the past?

Why can’t she just understand it?

“And pointing out to me that it’s your business. How can I—“I said it’s not what I meant. You’re putting braches and branches on it until it doesn’t make sense anymore. You won’t even listen to my explanations since earlier.” I cut her off. I could feel my chest throbbing again, my jaws tightening as I answer back.

She looks up to me with the same expression that worried me. “I’m not asking for explanations. Granted that you didn’t mean it, but you still did it and it hurt my feelings. A genuine apology would have eased it up a bit. But now that I told you first, it would lose its sincerity.” She looked intently into my eyes with her hurt ones before turning around to walk again.

“Saera, please. I’m sorry.” I try to hold her but she yank it away. “Don’t. . . talk to me for a while. Give me some space.” She muttered before completely leaving me there. I felt a lump block my throat giving me a much harder time to breathe, her words replaying in my mind.

I was too preoccupied of defending myself that I forgot that simple yet sinc