https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xOhGGEyGA8s

"When are you going to ask him out?"

"Shut up, Jimin."

Taehyung giggled as Hoseok screamed playfully and threw his arms around the younger boy from behind.

"You two are utterly disgusting to watch. Just ask him out so that you can annoy us with your PDA while actually being official."

"Shut up, Namjoon."

Half asleep, Taehyung climbed into Hoseok's bed and under the blanket. After he snuggled into Hoseok's side, he pressed his lips against Hoseok's cheek before lying his head down on the pillow. Less than ten seconds later, his breathing had evened.

Hoseok chuckled softly and tenderly kissed Taehyung's cheek back, then laid his arm over Taehyung's stomach before falling asleep himself.

"You know what you should do?"

"Stop."

"You should ask -"

"Shut up, Jin hyung."

"My brothers are coming over on Saturday," Taehyung said as he pulled out his math textbook at his desk. "Both of them. At three in the afternoon."

"Why?" Hoseok asked, looking up from his homework.

"Apparently Jungkook needs to tell us all something."

Hoseok circled his last answer slowly, thinking. "So he's officially going to announce that he's coming here?"

Flipping through his textbook until he found the right page, Taehyung answered, "I assume so. Can't wait."

"Would it help if I were here too? And Yoongi hyung?"

"Yeah, both of you being here would be pretty nice."

"Then we'll be here for you."

"Hyung! Hyung! Hyung, wake up! Hoseok hyung!"

Hoseok woke up as Taehyung shook him frantically, his face twisted into an expression of fear.

"Hyung, oh my god, you're awake, you scared me so much, hyung. Hyung. Hyung, you were moving around and you were shouting and I think you were dreaming." Taehyung lunged forward and squeezed Hoseok's torso tightly, burying his head in Hoseok's chest.

Hoseok realized that he was breathing a little too heavily, and that there was a light layer of sweat over his whole body.

And then the images were flashing behind his eyes and he remembered what he had been dreaming about, oh yes, he rememberd, and he screamed and buried his face in his arms, pulling on his hair with his hands until he couldn't feel anything anymore but the fear, oh the fear.

He could hear Taehyung begging him to stop

but it was like he was a billion

miles away and his voice was

muffled

and

he was going to die

he was going to die.

Help help help help help help help help help help help help help he would die help help help help help help help help help help help.

He could feel

fingers on

his face

brushing his tears away

he would die

and he could hear Taehyung

he would die

and that meant that Taehyung was there, right?

And if Taehyung was there then maybe

he wouldn't die.

He wasn't making any noise but his heavy breathing, he knew, so where

was the sobbing coming from?

Taehyung. Taehyung Taehyung Taehyung Taehyung Taehyung.

Taehyung was with him.

Taehyung was trying to pry his hands from their grip on his hair, Taehyung was pleading for him to come back, Taehyung was hugging him like he would never let go.

Taehyung would never let go.

Slowly, Hoseok's hands loosened, and he started breathing more normally, and his arms dropped to his sides.

Taehyung's face was pressed against his upper arm, his arms wrapped around Hoseok's neck.

Exhausted, Hoseok moved his arm upward with much effort and gently started running his fingers through Taehyung's hair. "I'm sorry." His voice came out raspy.

"Hyung," Taehyung sobbed. "I didn't know what to do."

"Shh, shh, it's okay. You were here for me, and that's all I needed," Hoseok said softly. "I'm sorry for making you go through this."

"Hyung, I'm sorry." He was still crying.

Hoseok drew Taehyung into his arms and laid back down, pulling the blanket over both of them. "Tae Tae, it's okay. Shh, it's okay, Tae."

Taehyung turned to face Hoseok, his face still streaked with tear tracks. He wiped them hastily with his forearm. "It's not okay, hyung. I wasn't able to help you. Yoongi hyung would've known what to do."

"Tae Tae, you were here for me, and that's what really matters, okay?" Hoseok flicked Taehyung's forhead lightly. "I'm fine, see?"

"But, hyung -"

"I'm fine, Taehyung. Now let's go back to sleep."

Smiling when Taehyung nodded slowly, Hoseok held him more tightly and closed his eyes.

It was okay if they missed their first classes.

"Taehyung told me what happened last night."

"Is he still upset?"

"Yeah."

Hoseok sighed. "How do I make him not upset?"

Yoongi gave Hoseok a small smile. "I can tell him how to calm you down, if you want."

"There's a way to calm me down?"

Raising an eyebrow, Yoongi smirked. "You mean other than kissing you?" He ducked to the side to avoid Hoseok's fist, laughed, and continued. "You tend to calm down faster when I hug you tightly and say comforting things in your ear."

"I guess that brings me back," Hoseok murmured.

"Hm?"

"When I'm having an attack, it feels like I'm not on earth. I know what's going on around me, but I can't stop the fear, and it just takes over me. And I know it's not real, that nothing will happen, that I didn't die that time and I won't die now, but I just can't break out of it. It's not fun." Hoseok bit his lip. "When I feel myself starting to have an attack, I know it's coming, but instead of being able to stop it, it kind of makes it worse because I end up hyperventilating because of the attack itself and on top of that because I'm scared of the attack."

Yoongi nodded thoughtfully. "You're still not able to be around the stuff that reminds you for long, are you?"

"Yup. I don't think I'll be able to get my license any time in the near future." Hoseok laughed sarcastically.

"Tae Tae!" Baekhyun screeched as he burst through the door.

Hoseok, Taehyung, and Yoongi, who had been listening to calming music from Yoongi's laptop, jumped in surprise.

"The door was locked! How did you get in?!" Taehyung yelled as Baekhyun and Daehyun took off their shoes and sauntered inside, Daehyun holding a laptop in his arms.

Baekhyun held up a bobby pin and grinned cheekily.

"Hey Daehyun," Yoongi said to his fellow junior, and Daehyun saluted back before placing the laptop on Taehyung's bed.

Both Baekhyun and Daehyun hopped onto it, and then gestured for Taehyung to sit with them. Taehyung sighed and stood from his spot on the chair next to Hoseok's desk to join them, and they immediately pulled him in between the two of them, causing Taehyung to roll his eyes and Hoseok to snicker. Daehyun opened his laptop and made sure the webcam was on, before pulling up his video chat.

After a few minutes of small talk between the three brothers, and Hoseok and Yoongi pretending to work but really listening to everything, the noise of an incoming video call rang out, and Daehyun accepted it.

"Jungkookie!" Baekhyun's rectangular smile was fully on display as his eyes turned into crescents at the sight of his youngest brother.

"Hey hyungs." Jungkook's voice was a smooth tenor, with a youthful quality.

Hoseok carefully watched Taehyung's face. Taehyung's expression stayed carefully composed, but Hoseok could tell that his entire body was tense, as he was seeing his younger brother for the first time in over half a year. His head stayed turned toward the screen, but his eyes kept wandering, and eventually, Taehyung's eyes made contact with Hoseok's. Hoseok gave him a nod and slight smile, causing Taehyung to bite his lip, nod back, and turn back to Jungkook.

"You had something to tell us? Something important?" Baekhyun questioned.

"Yeah, it's pretty big news and I wasn't sure if it was going to happen at all," Jungkook replied.

Hoseok raised his eyebrows. Jungkook didn't put much inflection into his speaking - it was as if he was holding it back to avoid displaying any emotion.

"So tell us!" Daehyun piped up.

"I'll be coming to your college next year on a full scholarship."

Both Baekhyun and Daehyun erupted, their voices overlapping as they offered Jungkook congratulations and asked him endless questions about how he had managed to do it and what he was planning to major in and wow Jungkook was so perfect and amazing! When they finally quieted down, Taehyung smiled softly.

"Congratulations," he said gently.

"Th-Thanks, hyung," Jungkook replied, and Hoseok frowned slightly as he heard the hesitation in his voice.

"Hey, Kookie! Want to meet a couple of Tae's friends? They're with us right now." Baekhyun glanced at Hoseok and Yoongi. "You guys want to say hi? He'll be in school next year with you guys, after all."

Yoongi shrugged. "Sure." He grabbed Hoseok's hand and they both walked over to the bed. Daehyun turned the laptop so that the camera was facing them, and they finally saw Jungkook's face. He had a baby face, just as Taehyung had said, and was wearing a little bit of eyeliner. Hoseok was struck by the expression in his eyes. He seemed . . . closed off, and somehow tired.

"Nice to meet you," Jungkook said, again without much inflection. Just a slight smile.

"You too!" Hoseok beamed his biggest smile. "Congratulations on getting in here!"

"Taehyung is very proud of you," Yoongi added, with a sickly sweet smile that Hoseok couldn't help but be simultaneously infuriated and amused by.

"Oh."

"Anyways, you should probably get back to talking to your brothers. We're intruding." Yoongi turned the laptop back toward Taehyung, Baekhyun, and Daehyun. He went back to where he and Hoseok had been sitting before, and Hoseok walked after him. He could feel a headache coming on.

"Hyungs, I have to go now. I have dance practice in a half hour. Bye."

"Bye, Kookie!" Daehyun smiled and waved before ending the video call. He closed his laptop and grinned at Taehyung and Baekhyun. "I can't believe it! He did it!"

"Yah, Tae Tae, you didn't seem all that suprised," Baekhyun commented, giving Taehyung a meaningful look. "Anything you want to tell us?"

"Oh." Taehyung laughed awkwardly. "I already knew before."

"Of course you did!" Baekhyun exclaimed. "Kookie would have told you first, since you two are so close."

Taehyung flinched.

Hoseok grimaced.

Yoongi coughed.

Taehyung cleared his throat. "Uh, yeah. Yeah."

Daehyun stood, holding his laptop carefully, and said, "Hyung, we should probably get going now. We have to practice for choir and help out with the graduation performance."

"Oh, you're right!" Baekhyun walked to the door, followed by Daehyun, and they both put on their shoes. "See you later, Tae Tae! And you guys too, Yoongi, Hoseok!"

"Bye!" Daehyun smiled brightly and the two brothers walked out, closing the door behind them.

There were a few moments of silence before Yoongi broke it in a drawling, deadpan voice. "It's nice to finally put a face to the dislike."

Hoseok couldn't hold back anymore and slapped Yoongi's arm before going back to Taehyung on the bed. He climbed onto it and drew Taehyung into his arms, hugging him tightly. Taehyung leaned his head slightly so that his temple was resting against Hoseok's cheek. "Hyung, I can't believe you would say that."

"Say what?"

"That Taehyung is proud of him!"

"He's not wrong," Taehyung muttered. "I am."

"But why would you say that?!"

Yoongi shrugged. "Being passive aggressive is a gift."

Another moment of silence passed. Taehyung laced his finger's with Hoseok's.

"You were right though. He's really cute," Hoseok stated in a matter of fact tone of voice.

"Wow, way to make me feel better about myself."

"It's okay." Hoseok squeezed Taehyung's hand a little tighter. "I still think that you're a million times cuter."

Taehyung laughed softly. "Thanks, hyung."

Hoseok noticed the tips of Taehyung's ear turning a light shade of pink.

He also pretended not to notice Yoongi making gagging motions on the other side of the room.

"Where's Taehyung?" Jin asked curiously.

"Out with Sungjae," Hoseok replied. "I didn't want him to be here."

Hoseok, Yoongi, Jin, Namjoon, and Jimin were all sprawled in various places around Hoseok and Taehyung's dorm room. Hoseok had invited the four others over earlier in the day.

Namjoon raised his eyebrows. "Why not?"

"Because I need your advice. How should I ask him out?"

Silence.

"Oh my god, he finally worked up the courage," Jin burst out, and it was as if a dam burst. The four others started cheering and jumping around while Hoseok watched them, unimpressed.

"If you guys want to act like mature adults, I'm open to suggestions."

"Hyung, how are we supposed to help?" Jimin laughed. "You know him the best out of all of us."

"Yeah, but I've never done anything like this before, so I thought that you guys could give me advice."

Namjoon shrugged. "I can't give you any advice on exactly how to do it, because the best way to ask someone out depends on the person being asked and the moment. And how close you are already. The most I can do is give you advice on how not to chicken out, honestly."

"I agree with Namjoon, Hobi." Yoongi winked. "You need to figure most of it out on your own. It's your relationship, after all."

"He'll say yes no matter what you do, anyways," Jimin murmered, and Jin nodded in agreement.

"There's no way you can mess this up. He'll take anything." Jin scoffed and continued. "He'll just be really happy that you're asking him out in the first place." He mumbled something else, which Hoseok instinctively knew was some sort of insult.

"What did you say?"

"Nothing."

"He said that it's taken you long enough and that he was afraid that you would never get around to it," Yoongi answered instead, sending both Hoseok and Jin a smug smile.

"Well, it has," Jimin piped up, causing Namjoon to laugh.

Hoseok groaned and buried his face in his pillow. "You people can leave now. You were supposed to help me, not make me feel worse."

The four of them laughed, and got up to start putting on their shoes. Hoseok, face still smothered, heard the door open, his friends call out goodbyes, and then the door close after a few moments. Then, he heard soft footsteps coming toward him, stopping right next to him.

"Hobi, I would wish you good luck, but you don't need it, okay?" Yoongi said quietly.

Hoseok turned over and smiled gently up at Yoongi. "Thanks, hyung."

Yoongi leaned down to peck Hoseok's cheek quickly, and left.

Finals passed, and everyone did well. They'd all managed to get some sort of studying done, despite how much time they wasted.

Jin graduated. They all met his and Namjoon's parents, who had come for the graduation because their families were so close. Namjoon denied any claim by the others that he had cried during the ceremony, but everyone had seen the lines glistening on his cheeks (it was rumored that even the stone Min Yoongi had shed a tear).

Summer began.

Hoseok moved back into Yoongi's apartment. Although Yoongi was gone for the first two weeks, since he was back with his mother and father, Hoseok still felt a little bit like he was coming home. He did miss rooming with Taehyung, however, for obvious reasons. He just had to make it through the summer, though. They would be able to move back in together during the next school year.

The little kids coming for the dance program were possibly the most precious creatures that Hoseok had ever laid his eyes on. He looked forward to teaching them every single day, and they all adored him. Jongin, Sehun, Sohyun, and Jinhwan were also staying to help with the program, and they would all whine that Hoseok got all of the love. Hoseok countered by telling them about how all of the girls had crushes on the three boys and all of the boys were convinced that they would marry Sohyun. They only came to him to gush about the rest of them.

Taehyung and Jimin got situated in their new room, and it turned out that indeed, Jimin was troublesome while asleep. Taehyung got used to it after just a couple days, and if it got too bad, would throw a pillow at Jimin to wake him up and whine about how loud he was.

After Yoongi came back, Hoseok noticed that he was a little bit brighter and happier.

"That visit did you good, didn't it?"

"It did. I missed them so much."

"Did you meet with Chansung hyung?"

"Of course."

"How is he?"

"Very good. He's going into education."

"So he's getting his life together."

"Yeah. I'm proud of him."

The six of them would make it a point to eat dinner together every day. Jin taught Hoseok more cooking skills, and Hoseok was now able to make a full meal on his own. The others, on the other hand, were still not very adept. It was an implicit rule to keep Namjoon away from any source of fire at all times.

They were happy.

They didn't bother Hoseok as much about asking Taehyung out anymore, since they knew that it was going to happen at some point. They knew that he needed the right moment.

"You've never had your first kiss?!" Jimin screeched, staring at Taehyung in disbelief.

"No!"

"Why not?!"

"I've never had a boyfriend!"

"But why not?!"

"I was always too focused on school. And extracurriculars."

"This is actually ridiculous," Jimin groaned, throwing his head back. "Is this even possible in the twenty first century?"

"Yeah, yeah, my life is lame. I know." Taehyung rolled his eyes.

Hoseok, Yoongi, Jin, and Namjoon exchanged amused glances. By some unspoken agreement, they all took another shot.

"Hey, Tae, wanna go for a walk before you head back to your room?" Hoseok said into Taehyung's ear.

The six of them were at Yoongi's apartment on a Friday evening, and had just finished dinner.

"Yeah, sure, hyung."

"Hey, we're gonna get some fresh air, and then I'll walk Taehyung to the dorm." Hoseok stood and stretched his arms.

"Cool," Yoongi replied absentmindedly. He, Namjoon, and Jimin were focused on some sports game on his laptop, and Jin was texting someone on his phone.

Yes, what friendship.

Hoseok grabbed Taehyung's hand to pull him up, and the two of them left quickly.

The evening air was slightly cool, a nice contrast to how hot it was during the day. The sun had almost set, and the horizon was slowly turning from a fiery red to a grayish blue. Hoseok and Taehyung's joined hands swung gently between them as they walked slowly. They ended up sitting on the bench in the clearing (their clearing, as they had come to think of it). They left some space in between them, and their hands rested in it.

Hoseok rubbed circles on the back of Taehyung's hand with his palm unconsciously as they sat in a comfortable silence. As the sun finally disappeared from the sky, the lamp on the other side of the clearing lit up, illuminating a sphere of space around it.

"Taehyung."

"Yeah, hyung?"

"You know, as soon as I first saw you, I knew your smile was off."

Taehyung laughed softly. "You told me."

"I also thought you were really cute."

"Really?"

"Yeah. Your face is pretty nice, Tae Tae."

Another laugh. "Thanks, hyung."

"I suppose what really drew me to you was how you tried so hard to be strong and pretend everything was okay when it really wasn't. It reminded me of me. And I really, really wanted to help you. I didn't want you to be hurting so much. You have no idea how glad I was on the day you told me everything. Yeah, I was really upset to have heard your story, but it meant that you were opening up to me. It meant that you trusted me, and it meant that I would be able to help you through whatever you were going through. And you let me in, you really did. You wanted to get better, and you just opened yourself up to me and I was able to do it. I'm so thankful for that.

"You started eating again. You were so skinny, Taehyung, so incredibly skinny. I could count your ribs through your shirts if they were even a little bit too tight. Then you started eating rice, and then full meals again. Your birthday party. You ate cake. I was so happy. And then you opened yourself up to Yoongi hyung as well, and I knew that it would be amazing because he understands as well. Back then . . . even now, yeah, we're hiding stuff from you, but you accepted it so easily and I appreciate it so much because I need to be ready. You understand that so well. A little too well. I think that was the moment when I really started to understand how much you've grown in just these nine or so months.

"If you'd had to be on a video call with Jungkook nine months ago with him telling you that he was coming to your college on a full scholarship and your brothers were gushing next to you, you would not have been able to handle it. But before finals, you just took it in stride and it was just amazing.

"You're so strong, Tae Tae. So strong. You're kind, and you're loyal, and incredibly hardworking. There's a never a dull moment when you're around, and I know how much you would do for the people you care about. You're amazing at both dancing and singing, and the way you act just makes you even more loveable. You can go out and make friends with anyone, and it's obvious to anyone who talks to you right away that you're trustworthy."

Hoseok had been gazing at the lamp the entire time he'd been talking, and was gripping Taehyung's hand a little bit tighter. Taking a deep breath, he carefully unlaced his fingers from Taehyung's and turned to face him. Taehyung was gazing at him, eyes wide, jaw slackened in mild shock. The sight brought a smile to Hoseok's face. "And you're really, really cute."

Taehyung visibly swallowed, opened his mouth to say something, and then closed it again. The two of them stared at each other for a little while. The lamp's light was reflecting in Taehyung's eyes again, making his irises glitter like stars. Since it was now fully dark, the lamp was the only source of light, and the clearing was quite dim. He couldn't look away from Taehyung. He just couldn't.

"Kim Taehyung."

"Y-Yeah, h-hyung?"

"Can I kiss you?"

Taehyung nodded. "Y-Yeah."

Hoseok leaned forward and pressed his lips against Taehyung's for a second, and pulled back just an inch, gauging Taehyung's reaction. He still seemed to be in shock.

"Can I kiss you again?"

Another nod.

Hoseok shifted closer and gently placed his hand on the back of Taehyung's head, pulling his face toward him. He pecked Taehyung's lips again, and then kissed him for a little bit longer. He smiled against Taehyung's lips when he finally felt Taehyung start to respond hesitantly, and kept kissing him gently. Taehyung began kissing back with more confidence, and wrapped his arms around Hoseok's neck, bringing him even closer.

When they ran out of air, Hoseok drew back slightly and rested his forehead against Taehyung's with his eyes closed. "I really like you a lot, Kim Taehyung."

The younger boy's voice was timid when he replied, but Hoseok could feel the sincerity behind it. "I really like you a lot too, hyung."

"I'm glad." Hoseok couldn't keep the grin off of his face. He pulled back a little bit more and gazed into Taehyung's eyes, which were still sparkling. "Would you like to go out with me?

"I would." Apparently Taehyung couldn't keep the smile off of his face either. "Hey, hyung . . ."

"Yeah, Tae?"

"Can we do that again?"

Hoseok responded by laughing out of pure bliss, and kissing Taehyung again.

Everything was perfect.

Ya'll. This chapter ain't great. But look at what finally happened. *emotional* MY CHILDREN.

Only one person requested anything for the one year anniversary thing (love you fam) so yeah I didn't do anything. Tell me if you still want me to do anything. The story is gonna start progressing a little faster now, and Hoseok's past will be revealed pretty soon.

HAPPY HOLIDAYS TO EVERYONE, NO MATTER WHAT YOU CELEBRATE. AND EVEN IF YOU DON'T CELEBRATE ANYTHING, THIS IS MY GIFT TO YOU.

202 subbies!!!!!!!!!!! I have over 200 subs I'm crying like wtf even is this. TWO HUNDRED. *more emotional*

I'm like. Not in a good state of mind right now lmaooooo I really need sleep. Wish me luck for all my winter break work. Or shoot me. Either one works. Yeah I really think I should sleep.

Until the next time~

<3 ^~^