Han Tae-sun had couple of model assignments coming up.  He needed to complete a song he was producing for an idol band.  He had to attend the arts school.  Life got busy for few days and he did not have time to really think about anything else.

He sighted Kim Dong-hyub couple of times in school, still hanging around with that guy Colin.  Everything looked normal.  ‘He seems to be taking this better than I thought’ he thought grudgingly.  He was happy for Kim Dong-hyub.  Frankly there were some moments he was worried he would have had to baby sit the guy just because he came out to him.  He did not want to take care of anyone right now. 

Other time, he thought of that conversation.  An uncertain Kim Dong-hyub asking him out. Refusing dates came naturally to him.  It had been a conscious effort that had become a second nature.  Almost automatic reflex.  He never allowed himself to pause and think about it.  Whenever he felt lonely, he would simply call one of his friends.  Whoever was available would meet up with him and they would take care of each other.  He had returned the favor several times.  It’s been this way for the last 3 years. 

‘Should I make some effort?’ Han Tae-sun wondered.

.....

Kim Dong-hyub heard his phone ring.  It was Han Tae-sun.  “Look up.  I am on your right.  Look for tall, handsome red head”

‘He is as cheeky as ever’.  He looked up and saw him waving at him.  He couldn’t help feeling happy.  “I see a tall, red head.  Handsome is debatable.  What’s up?  I thought you were not interested”.

“I will always be interested.  Your interests don’t seem to match mine currently”

“So, what’s with the call?”

“Thought I could seduce you”.  Kim Dong-hyub knew Han Tae-sun was just teasing him. 

“Too late for that.  I was seduced long time ago.  You are not interested in my kind of romance”.  Clearly they were flirting with each other. 

Kim Dong-hyub saw the smile from far. 

“Listen, I am getting together with my friends later.  I wanted to find out if you wanted to join” Han Tae-sun asked.

Han Tae-sun did not frequent gay clubs.  He had already gone thru that phase and did not find it fun anymore.  But, perhaps showing Kim Dong-hyub a bit of that side of life may help him.  See what is out there.  With his friends alongside, it will not get too uncomfortable. 

“Exactly how are we hanging out?” Kim Dong-hyub asked.  He was not sure what it meant for Han Tae-sun. 

“Is that important?  You will be safe, I promise” Han Tae-sun said.

Kim Dong-hyub was unsure but he had to start somewhere.  Having Han Tae-sun around would be helpful.  He said okay and they decided a place and time to meet up.

Han Tae-sun was waiting for him at the coffee shop in downtown.  Looking at Han Tae-sun up close again made Kim Dong-hyub heart flip.  Han Tae-sun simply nodded at him, hailed a taxi and gave an address. 

It ended up being a gay club.  There three other guys waiting for them.  Han Tae-sun made the introductions.  He also told the guys, Kim Dong-hyub had recently come out.  It annoyed Kim Dong-hyub.  He did not like Han Tae-sun taking over and announcing to his friends he is gay.  Then he learnt two of his friends were gay and one of them straight.  Apart from raised eyebrows, it did not appear to matter to any of them he was gay.  They just hugged him, said their hi’s and pulled him inside.

Han Tae-sun said to Kim Dong-hyub. “Any time you feel uncomfortable, tell me and we will leave”. 

“Next time, give me a warning and don’t introduce me as the new gay guy.  I am still getting used to the idea myself”.   Han Tae-sun immediately felt sorry.  He had not thought this through. 

“I am sorry.  I did not think.  But these guys will not care and that is why I did not think.”

Kim Dong-hyub has never been the one to be angry too long.  He was here, and he was determined to enjoy new experiences.  He will take it as it comes.

The club was noisy.  Theirs was a good looking group.  Four out of five were models after all.  So, they got a lot of attention.  Kim Dong-hyub was not sure how to feel.  It made him uncomfortable to have other males stare at him openly.  He felt Han Tae-sun pressing down his right hand.  He knew Han Tae-sun was trying to reassure him.  They found a booth and sat down.

Conversation flowed smoothly.  Others did all the talking.  Han Tae-sun did not speak much.  When he was not looking bored, he stared at Kim Dong-hyub.  Kim Dong-hyub tried to loosen up.  One of the gay friend, Hyun-ki was friendly and had a lot of anecdotes about modeling and from his part time job.  Kim Dong-hyub even laughed a little and shared anecdotes from his life.  He asked questions.  Listened to constant murmur around him.  Watched all the interesting display around him curiously.  Few people were alone at the bar, drinking and looking.  Others were couples openly touching and kissing.  Others were in group, all boisterous.  He was not sure if he would want to come alone to this place.  He would have to readjust his thinking.  Though he did not do it often, he had never felt uncomfortable sitting in regular bars alone and looking around. Here he did not feel the same.

Kim Dong-hyub also noticed Hyun-ki touched Han Tae-sun a lot and Han Tae-sun was very comfortable to those touches.  He tried not to let it bother him.  He wondered about that relationship.  Finally, when it bothered him too much, he pointedly let his eyes move from Han Tae-sun’s face to the Hyun-ki’s hands on his thighs and back to Han Tae-sun’s face.  Han Tae-sun was watching him and he moved his hands on top of Hyun-ki’s making it crystal clear what the relationship was.

After that, Kim Dong-hyub lost his mood.  He did not want to be there anymore.  He got up.  Thanked everyone for their company and said he had enough.  He did not let it show what he was feeling inside.  He said he had fun and left.  Han Tae-sun followed him.

“I think I had told you about my life style.”  Han Tae-sun said.

“Well, you did not have to rub it on my face.  It does not matter.  It’s my problem.  I will find a ride.  You can get back to your friends” Kim Dong-hyub said.  The anger that he hid in the club showed on his face.  There was no point hiding it from Han Tae-sun.  Han Tae-sun already knew how he felt.

Han Tae-sun looked at him.  Is it possible he was needling the guy deliberately?  ‘Am I being too cruel?  If I am, why?’.  Suddenly he was annoyed.  Why should he care? 

Han Tae-sun said “Okay.  See you around” and walked back to the club.  Kim Dong-hyub refused to look back though he wanted to punch the guy.  He could not believe Han Tae-sun actually walked back to the club.  He had never encountered someone as inconsiderate as Han Tae-sun before.  ‘It’s time I get over this infatuation’ he told himself while hailing a cab.  He thought of calling Colin just to escape from the funk he was getting into.  Then changed his mind and decided to go to a regular bar and drink.

Han Tae-sun in the meantime was very irritated when he went back inside.  His friends sensed that immediately. 

“What happened?” His straight friend asked. 

“ off” Han Tae-sun said in return.  They were used to him.  So, they ignored him rest of the time and went back to having fun.  Han Tae-sun just sat there and brooded sullenly.  Hyun-ki tried to pry again but was glared at.  So, he gave up and left him alone.

His phone rang on his way back to his apartment.  It was Kim Dong-hyub.  He did not take the call.  It rang again and he snapped “What?”.  It was someone else using Kim Dong-hyub’s phone.  “Are you Han Tae-sun?” the voice asked.  Han Tae-sun said yes and the voice said “I am calling from this bar.  There is a guy here who is drunk and we can’t let him leave alone.  He kept giving us your name.  So, we called.  Can you take care of it?”

‘He must be kidding’ Han Tae-sun thought.  He debated for a second on what he should do.  Voice asked him “Well?”.  Han Tae-sun asked for the address.  It was not far.  Idiot had just gone to a bar just one block from the gay club.  Han Tae-sun sighed.  He was tempted to have them call Colin.  But he was not sure if that was the right thing considering the state he must be in. 

So, Han Tae-sun went back.  Picked Kim Dong-hyub up.  He was very drunk.  He took help of a guy in the bar and pulled Kim Dong-hyub and dumped him in the cab.  He had no clue where Kim Dong-hyub lived.  Only one thing to do.  He gave his apartments address.  He lived alone in a studio room with a tiny kitchen, a small outside sink and a bathroom.  There was just one bed that turned into a couch when he was not sleeping.   It is going to be chore to get this guy to bed Han Tae-sun thought.  He was dead weight.  He kept calling Han Tae-sun an and a bastard every time he opened his mouth.  After a lot of pulling & dragging, Han Tae-sun finally threw him on the bed.  He was exhausted.  He removed his jacket and laid down on the bed himself just to rest and then promptly went to sleep. 

….

When Alarm rang in the morning, Han Tae-sun woke up slightly disoriented.  He heard snores next to him and remembered Kim Dong-hyub was on his bed.  He looked at him for a moment and felt .  ‘This annoying pest is definitely good looking and when he gets his head straight, I can teach him a few things’.  Kim Dong-hyub looked good enough to eat with his messy, tousled hair.  His mouth was slightly open.  He stretched sleepily and changed his position looking extremely comfortable.  That just made Han Tae-sun just harder.  He looked so y that Han Tae-sun was extremely tempted do some very bad but fun things.  It would tantamount to he decided.  So, he cleared his head and poked him instead. 

“Wake up!”

He heard some grumbling and then suddenly Kim Dong-hyub was awake and sitting on the bed, looking around in utter confusion.  Saw Han Tae-sun on bed and sat up straight and held his head.  “What the hell?   Where am I?”

“You are in my apartment.  I saved you”

Now Kim Dong-hyub was really confused.  He kept massaging his head.

Han Tae-sun explained. “You were drunk last night.  The bar guys said you kept saying my name.  So, they called me from your phone.”

Kim Dong-hyub blinked several times, trying to remember.  Bits and pieces came back.  He sighed.  He looked at Han Tae-sun.  “Thanks.  Sorry about that.  Have not done that in a while”

Han Tae-sun waved off his thanks.  “You look like .  Go wash your face or something.  You stink”

Kim Dong-hyub got up from bed holding his head.  He had a massive hang over.  “Do you think I can have some coffee?”

“Let me wash up first and then you can have your damn coffee else make it yourself” Han Tae-sun waved towards his kitchen.  He sounded very annoyed. 

For some reason Kim Dong-hyub found it amusing.  He really wanted to annoy this .  He remembered how lousy he felt last night.  “I will wait”.

Han Tae-sun grumbled something unfriendly under his breath.  Went to the bathroom to brush and shower. 

Kim Dong-hyub in the meantime used the outside sink to wash his face.  Found the toothpaste and used his fingers to brush.  Found a mouth wash to gargle with.  Found a napkin to wipe his face.  He was starting to feel a little better and slightly human.  He looked around the place.  It looked not welcoming.  Just like his personality Kim Dong-hyub thought as he shook his head. 

Han Tae-sun came out wearing a towel and using a smaller towel to dry his hair.  Kim Dong-hyub looked at him and blanched.  He was really thin, very pale and very attractive.  His wet red hair was a strak contrast to that pale face.  Those lips just looked as if they needed kissing.  “Wow”.  That escaped from his mouth involuntarily as he could not stop gaping.   And then he just walked towards him as if in a trance, pulled him close and kissed him.  Han Tae-sun tried pushing him but Kim Dong-hyub held on to him.  Han Tae-sun mentally shrugged and decided he might as well enjoy.  So he kissed him back.  When they came out for a breath, both of them were hard.  But Han Tae-sun’s better senses prevailed.  “What are you doing?”.  Even if he was , he had some decency left.

“You said you are willing to have ” Kim Dong-hyub said. 

“I am always willing.  But you are making a decision without thinking.  You will regret it”.

“I don’t care” Kim Dong-hyub said.  He went back for that kiss.  He was getting very addicted to those lips that looked swollen and red.  His hands started moving towards the towel around Han Tae-sun’s waist and Han Tae-sun stopped him.  This time he used his strength.  He is going to lose all control very soon and this was simply not right.

“NO.  You know what NO means right?” Han Tae-sun said.

“Why?  You are clearly liking it” Kim Dong-hyub struggled with Han Tae-suns hand, used his strength to move his hand down.

Han Tae-sun decided Kim Dong-hyub was not in a state to reason.  This just needed to be stopped.  “Because I don’t want to right now” trying very hard to stop Kim Dong-hyub’s hand from moving towards his crotch. 

Despite the resistance, Kim Dong-hyub won.  He pulled at the towel, dropped it on the floor and touched Han Tae-sun.  “I know you want to”.  Han Tae-sun groaned at the touch and then pushed Kim Dong-hyub violently away.

“I said NO” he almost screamed.  “Leave now”

That shocked Kim Dong-hyub into reality.    He looked at Han Tae-sun still breathing heavily.  Han Tae-sun was in front of him, semi hard, breathing heavily himself.  He lifted the towel and covered himself again. 

“Leave now.  I will call you later.  We need to talk.  But not now” Han Tae-sun said.  Kim Dong-hyub still stood there as if he had forgotten how to move.  So, Han Tae-sun pulled him by the hand, opened the door, shoved him outside and banged the door shut and locked it.  Then he leaned on the door and tried to calm himself.

Kim Dong-hyub was finally able to move.  He leaned against the door for a few seconds, with his head and hands resting on the door as he controlled his breathing.  What he did washed over him and he wanted to hide somewhere and never come out.  He could not understand how he went so out of control, almost forcing himself on Han Tae-sun.   He was mortified but had enough sense to move his body and leave.  Apologies will come later.

…..