You were woken up by the quiet sound of a rainstorm that was making its way through the city. The thunder roared in the distance while the rain followed suit, aggressively attacking your window and making its mark. Although the rain in itself wasn’t a bother, the last few weeks sure had been. Early morning classes after a two week vacation didn’t sound like the most pleasant thing in the world, but at least you were finally adjusting to the routine you had felt so lost without.

Since it was still early, you had time to sleep in as you class wasn’t till later in the morning. But, sleep was the last thing on your mind. All you could think about were those words that had been running through your mind ever since their owner had articulated them.

“It doesn’t even matter anymore”

What didn’t matter?

His feelings for you? Or the closeness you had once shared? That closeness that almost felt like it had been a dream. Things were so different now.

You would see Jongin every once in a while walking his dogs at the park beside your apartment. Sometimes he would be at the café on the main floor, other times you would see him at the corner store. Every time you saw him there was a strange sense of reassurance within your heart due to the fact that even though he was no longer a part of your life, he still existed and that was enough. His laugh, his smile, his love still existed, and although none of it was for you, they were still there.

But then one day, his presence was no longer there. He was no longer in the dance studio rehearsing with his team, or at that fried chicken place you’d often see him at. He no longer drank his tea on his balcony at night anymore, his apartment dark, empty, and forgotten. History was repeating itself.

Jongin had vanished, taking your lifeline along with him.

Where was he?

Why did he leave?

Was it because of you?

You didn’t have the right to raise those questions anymore; it was you who had pushed him away. But, he deserved it right? Karma had gotten him. So why did it feel like you were the one who had lost this game of life. Why was it that you were the one pacing outside his apartment in the early hours of the morning? Where was he?

Why were you the one weeping when the lonely nights got to you? Where was he?

He said he wouldn’t leave, he said he was sorry.

So. Where. Was. He.                       

It was a Friday night when you finally got your breath back. As you made your way through the park after an evening run, you caught a glance of him. He was sitting on a bench; his dogs resting near his legs while his head was titled back, eyes shut. The wind had grown a liking to his soft blonde locks, teasing his hair ever so slightly. He always looked at peace when he was like this.

You had witnessed this sight many times before, but today it was like you were seeing it for the first time. Tears were stinging your eyes, begging for their release. At that moment, you wanted nothing more than to jump into his embrace and feel his arms around you again. But you knew you couldn’t, you'd lost that privilege.  

But none of that held importance anymore because he was here, he hadn’t left.

You took a long breath, unable to suppress the smile that had been lost for some time now. Tears soon followed, washing away the fear and sorrow that had been engulfing your heart ever since his disappearance.

How long had he been gone? You glanced at your phone.

One week.

He was gone for a week.

 Yet, it felt like months. Just his mere absence set off warning bells within your heart. Was it always like this? Were you always searching for his presence in the dark?

No, something was different. This couldn’t be what love was all about… could it? What you felt towards Jongin when you were younger, that was love… wasn’t it?

 But you had never experienced what you were experiencing at this very second. This feeling was very new, something you were unfamiliar with. So maybe what you felt for him at a younger age wasn’t love, but mere infatuation? Maybe this feeling… this feeling was what love truly felt like. Yeah, that was it.

Just the sight of him gave you all the happiness in the world. But, that happiness didn’t last long. You hadn’t realized it but you hadn’t moved an inch for a few minutes. Jongin on the other hand, had. And his body was turned towards yours.  His usual expression of indifference that was reserved just for you was gone. It was replaced with pain, he was in pain. At what? You weren’t sure. You hadn’t seen a hint of emotion on his face ever since that night on the balcony, just before he walked away from you. Strangely enough, he looked just like he did that night.

It seemed like he himself hadn’t realize the way in which he was gazing at you. His lips formed soundless words; you were able to catch them before he caught himself. Then, his regular expression returned, cold and distant. He was meters away from you again, his body appearing smaller as the distance grew.

But, this time you weren’t hurt by his behavior like you typically were. It’s not that you were accustomed to it, no, that could never be the case.

It was because of those silent words, those words that gave you hope. Hope that maybe things would be okay after all, that maybe he was just as affected by this detachment as you were.

Words that still held meaning, even with the absence of sound;

"Don’t cry."

A/N:

So if you're wondering why this chapter is so short it's because it sort of serves as a teaser for the next one, which will be released either today or tomorrow.  I mostly just wanted to say that I got a lot of mixed responses last chapter, some of you were upset that she didn't choose Sehun while some were happy with her decision. For the people who weren't too happy, I totally understand how you feel. At first I wanted her to end up with Sehun as well, but then I realized it wouldn't make all that much sense. She always had a special connection towards Jongin, even if that connection was a bit hazy at times. You'll see later on that Jongin had a similar connection towards her. So for all of you asking why it couldn't have been Sehun, the reason is because it just wouldn't be fair. Sehun is a strong character in himself, and I don't want to portray him as that friend-zoned guy who just won't give up. He deserves someone who will love him as much as he loves OC, doesn't he? And maybe he will find her very soon ;)

Thank you for continuing to read and support my story, I highly appreciate all of your comments and feedback!