Ren’s POV

I awoke to the sound of my phone’s alarm blaring in my ear. Feeling as if I was suffering from a heart attack, I went into panic-mode and shot up from the ground inside of my room, immediately regretting that decision once I did. I felt a familiar pain in both sides of my temples. I winced; the natural sunlight pouring in from my bedroom window felt like the light of a thousand suns. Oh my god, why did I continue to do this to myself? I always did this. Every time I woke up from a drunken night, I always promised myself the ever popular saying: never again. I did it again. Sigh. If alcohol wasn’t for enjoyment, then they wouldn’t make it. That was my logic. I rose both arms into the air, stretching as I yawned. I glanced over to my left and practically screamed when I spotted someone passed out on the floor beside me. I brought both of my arms down and covered my mouth with my hands, letting out only a slight yelp. That’s right, I had invited JR over last night, hadn’t I? He hadn’t left? I glanced down at all of the empty beer cans littering the floor around us. I could practically swim in all of the aluminum.

“God, you have a problem, Ren…” I said out loud, shaking my head in disapproval. I knew without a doubt that they were probably all mine. JR was a lightweight, from what I remembered. It probably only took him one and a half to get him to pass out. I paused for a moment, staring up at the ceiling to think about the events that occurred last night. Most of it was a blur. I invited JR into my room, let him poke around my closet… think Ren, think. What happened after that? No matter how hard I thought about it, nothing came to surface. I glanced back over at the unconscious blonde. I at least behaved, didn’t I? I had to stop and think yet again. No… with JR? I stared down at his soft facial features as he slept. He wasn’t bad looking… he was actually kind of cute… But there’s no way anything would have happened between us without him extremely overreacting to the situation. He would have sent me flying through the wall if I had tried to touch him. Besides, both of our clothes were perfectly still intact. I sighed with relief. I behaved. Good.

I reached over and nudged JR, shaking his left shoulder. His eyes slowly fluttered open. When he was fully awake, he gave me possibly the saddest look I had ever seen in my life. He almost looked like a moping puppy, upset that I had woken him up. “Hmm?” He paused for a moment, taking a brief look at his surroundings. When he realized he wasn’t in the security of his own apartment he immediately sat up with an alert look on his face. He almost seemed terrified.

“Relax, you’re still at my place.” I reassured him.

“…Your place?” He slowly asked, calming down. I tilted my head to the side, surprised.

“You don’t remember?”

He shook his head then winced. “…Why does my head hurt so much?” He placed his right hand over his forehead and winced again, shrieking out in pain. “Ah!” I stared at him with wide eyes, alert. I understood the pain of a hangover quite well, but his reaction wasn’t it… I leaned forward and used my right hand to brush his messy blonde bangs out of his face, revealing his forehead. JR sheepishly shifted his gaze down into his lap as I invaded his personal space and touched him. I awkwardly froze as my eyes beheld the sight in front of me. I would have never realized this if I hadn’t moved his hair out of the way before, but without the bangs JR was actually attractive. It took a couple of seconds of stunned silence before my eyes caught what I had originally overlooked; the big, nasty purple bruise painted across his forehead. I paused. Then it hit me.

 

[FLASHBACK]

“Have another one!” I forcibly placed another can of beer in JR’s hand as the two of us drunkenly stood in the middle of my room. Sometime during the middle of his visit, we had run out of alcohol and I had to do another beer run. Of course, I had only bought a few when I first stopped. Originally, I didn’t think that we would end up needing much, but JR was too tense, making the aura around us awkward. Somehow I had managed to get him to drink three of the six cans that I had bought. Of course, by the second he was already feeling tipsy while I was barely even buzzed. I had left him in my living room while I ran to the corner store down the street and bought several more. When I returned, somehow we migrated back to my room where we continued to chug down more. Before we knew it, we had lost count and my floor became a sea of empty beer cans, and yet, I was still forcing more on him. JR had been far too polite up until now to tell me ‘no.’ But now he was starting to reach his maximum limit. JR staggered backwards, struggling to keep his balance. He shook his head in protest.

“Please… no… no more.”

“You’re such a lightweight!” I exclaimed, taking a step forward in the heap of empty beer cans that lined the floor of my room. I could hear the sounds of several cans shifting and grinding against one another as I tried to make my way closer to him, on my way to force him to drink it. JR stared at me with panicked eyes. With his unopened beer can in his right hand, he held his left hand out in front of him as a shield to protect himself. He continued to take several steps backward as I approached him. “Come on, it’s fun! Aren’t you having fun???” I drunkenly continued to chase him at about the pace of a snail around my room, knocking several things down in the process.

“Y-Yes… but…” JR paused once again to protest. I raised both arms and drunkenly smiled as I cornered in on him.

“I got you!” I took another step forward and lunged at him with my arms. Right as JR quickly spun around to escape my grasp, I stepped on a can of hairspray that I had previously knocked down, tripping over it and shoving my hands onto his back and pushing him face-forward into the wall.

SLAM!

I fell to the floor about a foot behind JR. As I glanced up, my eyes widened in shock at the sight of a fresh new hole in the wall and an unconscious blonde still laying with his head inside of it, his lower half sticking out. I pursed my lips together in silence… “JR…?” I called out to him.

Silence.

“Um… JR? You can’t sleep in there…” I crawled forward and pulled him backwards and out of the hole. He fell back into my arms, his head heavily hanging from his neck. I messily stood on my two feet and hunched over, grabbing at his shirt sleeves and dragging him backwards into the center of the room again. As I dragged him the sound of several empty beer cans filled the entire room yet again. When I got him towards the foot of my bed, I pointed at the ground. “There… you can sleep there… and I’ll just…” I fell backwards, severely misjudging the amount of space between me and the bed and ending up crashing to the floor beside him with a loud THUD.

[END FLASHBACK]

 

I guiltily smiled at JR, nervously patting his bangs down in place to cover the bruise before pulling away from him. JR looked at me with curious eyes. “Did you see anything?” He quietly asked. I shook my head, waving my right hand in front of me, trying to dismiss any worries.

“You’re fiiiiine.” I lied. Oh god. He’s going to see this. He’s going to question his significant pain and he’s going to discover the bruise and kick your , Ren…

JR paused. “Really? I don’t feel fine…” He started to reach for his forehead. I jumped in my seat.

“Really!” I said before he could touch his forehead again. JR lowered his hands then nodded. He took a moment to observe all of the empty beer cans on the floor. As he was about to say something, he slowly shifted his gaze up from the ground and over at the obvious hole in the wall. He froze then blinked. I leapt to my feet and ran over towards it, covering it with my body. “Oh, that?” I nervously laughed. “That’s… always been there, ha ha!”

JR slowly rose to his feet and lightly pushed me out of the way. Without so much as saying a word, he walked over to my full length body mirror, as if putting together the pieces inside of his mind. I felt my heart come to a complete halt as I watched him brush his bangs out of his face. JR suddenly gasped. I crashed down to my knees, clapping my hands together and bowing, begging for his forgiveness.

“Pleasedon’tsueme,Ihaven’tstartedmakingmoneyyet!!!”

JR stepped away from the mirror and stood back in front of the hole in the wall, staring down at it. “…I’m sorry.” He apologized, catching me off-guard. I glanced up from the floor.

“H-Huh?”

He pointed at the hole. “I broke your wall…”

I paused. “Wait, what…?” He wasn’t… angry with me? After all, I was the one who literally shoved his face into the wall. Oh, how did he possibly think of me now? I was just some random stranger off the street that happened to be lucky enough to have been invited to a runway show, where I forced my company on him… and now this. I mentally gasped. Choi Ren, you physically assaulted another man!

“I’ll pay to fix it.” He replied, reaching for his wallet. I stared at him like he was crazy and immediately jumped back up and placed my hand over his to stop him.

“No! Don’t! I mean… you don’t have to.” I protested. This was too much. I couldn’t take his money when I couldn’t even tell him the truth about what had really happened. I felt like a rotten person. Just come clean to him…

“But… it was my fault.” He replied. My heart started to ache at his sincerity. I couldn’t lie to him. Especially not if I wanted to remain his friend. I didn’t have a choice.

“No… actually, it was mine. You see… I sort of… pushed you last night and… you fell.” I replied, shifting my gaze down to the ground. “I’m sorry.”

JR stared at me for a moment in silence. When I was brave enough to glance back up at him, I noticed an amused smile spread across his lips. “Wow...” He replied. I paused.

“You’re not… mad?”

JR laughed. “I’m ok.”

“Really? Are you sure? You don’t need to go to the hospital?” I asked, weary of the extent of damage I had caused him. When he offered to pay for causing the hole in my wall I started to consider the possibility of potential brain damage that could have occurred last night. I know that if I had shoved my brother’s face inside of a wall he would have murdered me and gladly have taken the jail sentence for it. In fact, he probably wouldn’t even try to hide it or cover it up. But thank goodness this guy was nothing like my brother. JR actually had a soul, whereas Minseok… eh. JR sheepishly nodded in response to my question.

“I’m fine.”

“I feel sooo bad.” I replied. JR waved his hand at me, trying to dismiss it.

“It’s late… I should probably go so you can get to work.” JR smiled. I hesitantly nodded then followed him out of my room and into the living room where he grabbed his hoodie and placed it back on. I led him to the door and opened it for him, watching him leave. I waved goodbye to him and he nodded, quickly making his way down the stairs until he disappeared into the parking lot. I closed the door, pressing my back against it inside. I sighed heavily. Yeah, definitely not again. No more alcohol for sure!

 

 

“Ren!” Jason exclaimed several hours later as I arrived and stepped into the JA Style building. I smiled at him, trying to disguise the pain the loudness of his voice had on my ears due to my still lingering hangover. Jason happily approached me, throwing his left arm around my shoulders and shifting his weight onto me. This man… he had no idea what the concept of ‘personal space’ was, did he? Although I was somewhat uncomfortable, I bit my tongue and decided to bear it. Jason was weird and he had his quirks, but he was also the man responsible for helping me get the start I needed to set foot in the fashion industry. I waited for him to continue. “After work tonight, let’s go out and get drunk!”

“Why???” I whined. The word immediately escaped my lips before I could even process it. I was met by a startled look from Jason and his front workers lingering around the first floor of the building. I hesitantly smiled. “I mean… yay…” I replied sarcastically, the joy ever so evident in my voice.

Jason scoffed, throwing his arm off of me. “Well, if you must know, you little fun-er, it’s a going-away party!” He declared after taking much offense to my remark. I gave him a curious look, tilting my head to the side.

“Who’s going away?” I asked.

“Me!” He happily exclaimed.

“Wait, what???” My heart sank. What? He was leaving? But he had just signed me- I panicked. What about Aron and Minhyun? He couldn’t leave me alone with them! There was a war going on! Jason smirked, folding his arms across his chest.

“The China office calls, dear Ren. I’ll be back in a week.” He replied dramatically, almost sounding as if he had received a draft notice and was being summoned to go to war. And all this was about was simply going to sign documents and perhaps check up on things. Jason, really, you’re too much. But even still… Please don’t leave me alone with them…

“Then why do you need a going-away party if you’re coming back so soon-”

Jason covered my mouth with his hands, cutting me off. “You need to stop putting logic into things.” He replied sternly. “Will you come? The other models are coming.” He tried peer pressuring when his first tactic of simply asking had failed.

I sighed. Why couldn’t Jason have the inherit gift of mind-reading? “If I have to.” I responded. Really, please, please don’t go… I was mentally sobbing.

“Goodie! I’ll write you down as coming. Sweet!” He exclaimed, either completely oblivious to my misfortune or he didn’t care. “Now go upstairs and practice your walk. When I come back from China I want to see a drastic improvement if you even want to dream about meeting Mr. Kim!”

My eyes lit up as he mentioned my inspiration, temporarily making me forget about him abandoning me with the two people who absolutely hated my guts for no truly valid reason other than petty jealousy. “Does that mean I can meet him soon?” I asked, my heart racing with excitement. These feelings of joy were short lived, seeing as how Jason pouted in response.

“It was just an expression! Mr. Kim has no immediate plans of collaborating with me as of yet. Besides, I just launched a new collection myself. No, dear, you’ll have to wait until something in the schedule clears up for both of us. Then we’ll talk about a possible collaboration and then I’ll mention something to him about your beautiful face, deal?” Jason explained. I forced a smile on my face, trying to cover up my true feelings.

“I understand.” I replied. I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t a bit disappointed. But I knew how difficult a request I was making. After all, I was just some nobody. For what good reason would Mr. Kim have to meet me? From Mr. Kim’s point of view, it probably didn’t make much sense at all. Even still, though. I wanted to meet him and bother him with my presence if just for a few seconds in time. It would mean the world to me… But I had to snap back into reality and stop dreaming, at least for now. If I wanted to meet my hero, I would have to work my way up and become someone worthy of meeting. I could just see it now; becoming a successful model on the runway and various agencies throughout the world clamoring for the chance to sign me… And of course, I’d turn them all down for House of Kim. The dream… In order for this magical moment in time to happen, I would have to become Jason’s top model. Doing that would mean taking that title away from Minhyun. But Minhyun promised me that if I was successful, he would at least take me to where Mr. Kim constructed most of his clothes. Even though there was a 0% chance of meeting him there, the fact that it was his workshop still made it enticing enough for me to want to take on Minhyun’s challenge. I dismissed myself from Jason’s presence and made my way upstairs where I found myself walking into an awkward situation.

“Why are you mad at me?” Aron asked as he and Minhyun walked past the staircase on the second level. Minhyun kept his attention in front of him as he walked forward and away from Aron, giving him the cold shoulder. Aron continued to follow him regardless of the fact that he clearly wasn’t wanted. Eventually Minhyun gave in to frustration and stopped as he reached the hallway of offices. He folded his arms across his chest and narrowed his eyes at Aron, obviously not haven seen me. He leaned forward and gave Aron a fierce, intimidating scowl that even had me feeling somewhat inferior from a distance.

“Why am I mad? It’s because you only ever think to act alone!”

Aron paused. “Did I do something wrong?”

Minhyun laughed, obviously pissed. “Don’t play so stupid. It’s not attractive in the slightest.”

Aron gave him a hurt look. “Tell me what I did wrong.”

“Do you have a tape ?” Minhyun asked, shifting all of his weight onto his left leg with attitude. Aron gave him a blank, guilty stare. I remained quiet, hiding behind one of the corners of the walls in the hallway, listening in. “Leave the childish pranks to children.”

“Well how else was I supposed to handle him?” Aron asked in protest.

“Ren is my problem, not yours. If there is anyone that is going to handle him, it’s myself, but I’ll make those calls on my own and certainly I won’t sink down to that level of childish stupidity I observed from you the other day.”

“What’s so wrong with helping you? Shouldn’t I?”

“Stay out of it.” Minhyun snapped.

“Is it that unheard of for one’s boyfriend to take their side?” Aron asked, hurt. I froze. Boyfriend? Minhyun and Aron were dating? So that’s what it was… that strange connection between them that I felt since day one. At first I couldn’t place it. I considered the possibility, but I didn’t want to make the wrong assumption just in case I was wrong. I thought Aron’s behavior at the show and during practice the other day was strange. Now it all made sense. He was taking Minhyun’s side for personal reasons, not just because he was trying to up to him.

“Not if it’s dangerous. There’s words and then there’s actions. You should refrain from doing the latter.” Minhyun replied.

“Dangerous? It was a harmless prank!”

“Harmless? What if no one showed up? Surely he wouldn’t see that as ‘harmless.’ You’ll be so lucky if he doesn’t choose to press charges against you.” Minhyun sternly stated. I was stunned. Minhyun was actually standing up for me? I couldn’t believe it. Actually, once I thought about it, it wasn’t all that surprising… Minhyun was the one after all that ended up untying me from the beam that Aron had so willingly taped me to. Even though he was nasty to me afterwards, he very well could have just walked off and left me there. He didn’t have to do what he did. This led me to believe that maybe Minhyun wasn’t as cold as I originally thought… Though I still considered him as the ‘nicer’ one of the two, he was still cruel.

Aron scoffed. “Whatever! You always get your way anyways!” He threw his arms up in defeat. Minhyun tilted his head to the side and darkly smirked.

“That’s because the top model always gets what he or she wants. Don’t like it? Why don’t you try to claim this title for yourself then?” He replied tauntingly. Aron took a step backwards, shaking his head in disagreement.

“You know I don’t want that title.”

“Right; you just want to date whoever is.”

Aron scoffed. “I don’t have to put up with this.” He muttered then spun around. My heart started to race as he started heading in my general direction. Dammit. There wasn’t any time to escape, especially not without him seeing me. Imminent doom heading my way in 3, 2, 1…. Aron suddenly froze after he walked past me where I had been hiding behind the corner. He slowly turned back from looking over his shoulder and furrowed his brows at me. He looked pissed. He scoffed. “Wow, well what do we have here? A spy?”

Crap… Think of something, think of something. Don’t just stand there looking stupid, Ren. I arrogantly held my head up high and folded my arms across my chest. “You don’t think I have better ways to waste my time rather than spy on you?”

“Don’t you?” Aron asked, waiting for an answer. I pouted.

“Ok, so maybe not yet… but I’ll find something!” I pathetically proclaimed. An amused smirk crossed his lips in response. Meanwhile Minhyun coldly and quietly walked past the two of us, heading for the staircase and climbing up to the third floor. As he passed, Aron’s smile faded into a frown. Once he was gone Aron turned back to me.

“How’s your walk? Did you improve your posture?” He darkly smirked, teasing me. I quietly glared at him for what he had done to me. He had the nerve to laugh. “Thought as much. You speak to the boss? He says he’s going out for a week and when he returns he’s expecting you to-”

“I know this much; you don’t have to waste your time repeating it.” I replied, not wanting to deal with him any much more than he wanted to deal with me. Aron raised a brow.

“Waste my time?”

“Obviously it’s so precious, isn’t it?” I snorted.

Aron smirked. “You’re right; it is. In fact, far too precious to waste the week away training your sorry , which means you’ll have to find somebody who will.” He poked me in the chest with his index finger. “Neither Min or I will do it and I’ve already trash-talked your name amongst the other models. So good luck, buddy.” He clapped the imaginary dust off from his hands then walked off, leaving me alone to brood in silence. I couldn’t believe what he did- or rather, I could believe he did it, but I couldn’t understand why he would. There was nothing in it for him, other than helping Minhyun, who didn’t even seem to want his help. I pursed my lips together. A wave of anxiety washed over me. What was I going to do? Jason was expecting me to learn how to improve my walk, but how was I to improve if no one around here was willing to help me? It felt like a lost cause. I didn’t have any other choice. I would have to confront my worries with Jason tonight before he left if I expected to find any help, even if that meant ratting out Aron.

 

 

After spending a majority of the day at JA Style, I left with Jason, Aron, Minhyun, and a few of the other models. Aron and Minhyun caught a cab of their own while I shared one with Jason and the others took their own cars for transportation. We all agreed to meet at the following club that Jason had picked out earlier. It wasn’t until we arrived did I learn that Jason had reserved a VIP room for our small party. I couldn’t help but feel widely impressed about everything. This was my first time experiencing something as lavish as all of this, especially surrounded by so many famous people. Jason seemed to take notice of this factor and chose to stick around me, reminding me that this was my life for now on before kindly pouring me a glass of… well, I probably should have checked the name of whatever it was he served me before drinking it. I prayed to god that I didn’t end up getting sick tonight by mixing different combinations of drinks.

As the night progressed, Jason kept pouring both him and myself round after round to the point where my head felt like it was spinning and I lost track of time. Somewhere between the fourth and fifth drink, the music on the speakers became increasingly louder and muffled. I glanced over at the other models to see them dancing and having fun amongst themselves while Minhyun and Aron were boldly making out on one of the couches. Minhyun was laying on his back, pulling Aron on top of him as the two literally each other’s faces off. I had to look away from the disturbing, intimate sight. It was getting way too heated far too fast between the two of them. Jason suddenly slapped me on my back, startling me. I screamed, temporarily forgetting where I was and who the strange person sitting beside me was. Jason flinched backwards for a second then laughed at my unsophisticated behavior.

“They tend to do that a lot.” He slurred his words as he spoke, pointing over at Minhyun and Aron who I desperately tried to avoid looking at. I rubbed both of my temples, trying to calm a sudden wave of nausea that hit me. Oh god. Don’t you dare throw up here in front of all of these important people or inside of this nice room. You know very well you can’t even afford to sit in this room alone yet, let alone afford to pay for cleaning it. Keep it in, keep it in. Dammit. I needed a distraction. I decided to try to strike up a conversation with my boss.

“Ever thought of stopping them?” I spoke slowly. Jason raised a brow then glanced back over at the only couple making out in the room. He shrugged.

“They’re like rabbits; an unstoppable force.”

“Wait… what?” I blinked then stared at him like he was crazy. Was it the alcohol talking, or did he really just say something strange an irrelevant just now? I shook my head. “I don’t know what you just said.”

“Yeah, I don’t know either…” Jason’s voice trailed off as he threw his arms out to the sides and laid back in the booth. I felt my stomach roaring on the inside. This wasn’t good. It was going to happen. I was going to embarrass myself in front of all these seemingly good people, with maybe the exception of Minhyun and Aron. I needed to find a plan of escape.

“I’m not feeling too good.” I finally said.

“What? It’s still early!” Jason proclaimed, sitting back up straight and looking at me as if I was a buzzkill.

I shook my head. “I need to go home.” I replied. I didn’t want to admit to him that I didn’t even want to come in the first place (although he probably already knew). I came just to keep the peace… and some other reason that I couldn’t quite recall at the moment. I felt my stomach already starting to twist and turn inside of me, sending sharp pains into my abdomen. I leaned forward, grabbing at my sides. Jason observed me.

“You don’t look so good… Do you have anyone to come pick you up?” He asked.

I shook my head. “Don’t worry about it; I’ll call a cab.”

“Absolutely not. A drunk pretty boy like you getting inside of a shady cab alone this late at night? Anything could happen. I can’t afford to lose another model.”

I stared at him with wide eyes. “You mean you’ve lost a model before?!”

A smirk spread across Jason’s face as he grinned. “Ah, got you!” He nudged me in the arm with his elbow, clearly enjoying tormenting me.

“Don’t scare me like that!” I drunkenly protested. “I’m still scared of you, god!”

“Bwahaha, fear me!” Jason proudly declared, placing his hands on his hips and laughing like the maniac he was. Jason, this wasn’t a good thing. I’d never forget the initial scare he gave me when we first met. What normal, sane person would chase down a person on the street like that? Well, clearly Jason wasn’t normal. Nothing about him screamed ‘normal.’ His hair, his clothes, his outlandish personality… After a few seconds of basking in my misery he settled down. “But still, you should call someone. It’s still not safe to go alone.”

“Alright, I’ll call someone.” I removed my cellphone from my pocket and unlocked the screen as Jason hovered over me, watching me scroll through my contacts list. For a second I almost felt offended. Did he mind? Screw it. I was too inebriated at this point in time to care. He suddenly pointed as I came across one name in particular.

“Who’s ‘Minseok’?” He asked.

I paused as I thought of my far better good-looking brother than me. If Jason chased me all the way downtown, what would he do to Minseok? “No one important.”

Jason shrugged. “Whatever. Didn’t care anyways.” He childishly retorted before I once again came across JR’s number. I hesitated. It would be wrong of me to call on him, especially after what I did to him last night. I mean, I practically shoved his head right through a wall, lied to him about it, and then begged him not to sue me. You couldn’t actually call me a good friend, now could you? Not to mention he even apologized for breaking the wall! I was failing at this whole friendship thing. It was never this hard and awkward in the past… I froze as a sudden thought occurred to me. What if JR didn’t pick up and purposely didn’t answer my call? Ah! I started to have a mini-panic attack. Jason leaned over and pressed the call button beside JR’s name. I immediately glanced up and stared at him with wide eyes as if he had just pressed the button that set off all of the world’s nuclear missiles, rather than dialing a phone number.

“Why would you do that to me, you fiend?!” I darkly snapped as the phone started dialing.

Jason paused. “Because. That person is not a bad guy.” He replied then tilted his head to the side. “…Did you just call me a fiend?”

“Hello?” JR surprisingly picked up. I nervously laughed.

“Buddy!”

There was a brief moment of silence on JR’s end of the line. “You’re drunk again… aren’t you?” He cautiously asked.

“Sorry…?”

JR sighed. “Where are you?” He didn’t even hesitate to ask, something which surprised me. I glanced at Jason who urged for me to tell him where I was. I couldn’t help but shake what Jason had just said before JR answered my call. He said that JR was a good guy. Then did that mean that Jason knew JR? I thought about the possibilities. Jason was a designer. JR was a fashion blog writer. Jason walked the runways with his models. JR usually sat first row beside those runways. Had the two come into contact with one another? The way JR had spoken about Jason’s clothes- he knew the JA Style brand well. Judging by Jason’s comment just now, they had to have known each other.

“I’ll text you the address. Can you come get me?”

“I’m on my way.” JR replied in his quiet voice before hanging up. I did as I said and texted him the address after having Jason remind me of where it was that we were. Once it was done, I glanced at Jason with a quizzing look on my face.

“Do you know JR?”

Jason nodded. “Of course I know him. He’s written articles about me on the internet. He’s interviewed me at least a dozen times!”

“Really?” I asked, momentarily forgetting the queasiness I felt because of all of the alcohol intake. “Then… can I ask you something?”

“Hmm?” Jason asked.

“Is he always like that?”

“Like what?”

“You know… so quiet and reserved and shy.”

Jason smirked in amusement. “Oh yeah, definitely.” He replied as if this was old news. I stared at him.

“So it’s not just me?” I asked, having wondered if he was only this way around me or if it was everyone in general. His behavior… it was unusual. He was almost like a frightened child. But then I had to factor in that ‘shy’ factor of his as well and it made me wonder… was it my doing?

Jason’s smirk grew even wider. “Why, did you want it to be just about you?” He teased. I glared at him.

“That’s not funny.” I replied, going back to grabbing at my sides in pain. Jason laughed.

“You want my advice? Don’t get involved with that kid. He doesn’t know romance; he’s too caught up in his own, strange little world. And unless you want to be the one that has to teach him everything, then move along. The only relationship you’ll get out of him is the relationship between a teacher and a student, if even that.”

“We’re friends.” I insisted. Jason stared at me, a bit surprised.

“Is that so?” He suddenly went quiet, making me start to mentally question him. He forced a smile on his face. “Well, that’s good. Maybe it’ll be good for him.”

I nodded. “It can’t hurt.” I replied then glanced back at Minhyun and Aron who were still going at it. I shuddered then quietly scolded myself for looking back there again. I mean, honestly, what was I expecting to see? After that disturbing image scorched my eyeballs I turned my attention away while I waited for JR to arrive. Surprisingly, it didn’t take him too long. About fifteen minutes later JR arrived in yet another tragic fashion disaster. This time he was wearing a faded, cheap looking grey hoodie and torn up black jeans with a pair of dirty white converse. As he awkwardly stepped inside of the party VIP room he kept his head down low, hiding in his shoulders. All eyes suddenly shifted towards him, even Minhyun and Aron who had paused their ‘activity’ to glanced up at him. I could see him start to nervously flinch with all the attention being directed at him. I wobbly rose to my feet and made my way over towards him but I seemed to take forever, or rather, too long for JR to wait. Still looking down, he booked from the room and dashed further into the club. As he ran off I extended my hand out to him. “Don’t run away!” I couldn’t see straight.

Jason sighed heavily, shaking his head while scolding his models. “This isn’t the first time any of you have seen him, so why start acting like it now?!” He said, coming to JR’s defense when the blonde physically couldn’t stand up for himself after having fled from the room.

Aron pulled away from Minhyun and glanced at Jason. “That guy’s weird; can you blame us from staring?”

Jason frowned. “You, come with me.” He said, sounding pissed then stood, reaching over and grabbing Aron by his elbow and yanking him up to his feet. He pulled the brunette with him out of the VIP room. Right as they passed me I felt the contents of my stomach start to try to make its way up and out. My eyes grew wide and I slapped my right hand over my mouth while haphazardly running out of the room, making my way to the bathroom and knocking into several people in the process of doing so. When I arrived I literally broke the door down and ran inside, brushing past Jason and Aron who were standing inside. I practically tore down one of the stall doors, crashing to my knees on the floor and kneeling over the toilet where I emptied what felt like my entire stomach. Both Jason and Aron paused as I flew past them, however, this didn’t seem to stop the conversation they were having previously before in private.

“You’re as nice as ever.” Jason said sarcastically.

“I don’t like him. I’m not about to kiss someone’s that I don’t like. I don’t care if he’s a reporter or not. His clothes are hideous and wrinkled. His hair’s a mess. A normal person doesn’t walk outside looking as if they just stepped out of a washing machine! A sane person at least takes a glimpse in the mirror before stepping out; but yet that guy has the nerve to attend fashion shows like that? How much less can a person care about his physical appearance? He obviously doesn’t give a damn about the industry he claims to represent.”

“It doesn’t matter what he looks like; respect is always something that should be a given. He’s never done anything to you to deserve any less. Hasn’t he written flattering articles about you?” Jason asked, annoyance clearly evident in his tone.

Aron scoffed. “So he wrote an article. Should I bend over backwards for him too?”

“You best treat people right; you never know who a person is, the people they know, or what kind of power they hold. If you were smart, you’d think twice about who you mindlessly run your mouth about.” Jason sternly scolded.

I hunched over the toilet, gasping for breath. I reached over and flushed, wiping my mouth on a piece of toilet paper and tossing it in a bin before finally bringing myself back up onto my feet, feeling only slightly better. I opened the stall door and stumbled out into the area where Jason and Aron were still standing. Aron shot me a look of annoyance while Jason rolled his eyes at me. I mentally scoffed. Jason, you were the one who did this to me, you jerk. You have no reason to roll your eyes at how pathetic I look right now… I stopped in front of the row of sinks to wash my face and hands while the two continued their conversation.

“Him? He’s just some awkward as writer from some lesser known internet blog on fashion. An oddball like him could never really have the connections you claim him to have. Hell, I’m pretty sure it’s you who sends him all these invitations to all these fashion shows.” Aron claimed.

Jason smirked, raising an amused brow. “You think so?” He asked, folding his arms across his chest. Finally he shook his head. “You’re really something else.”

Suddenly another bathroom stall door swung open. I glanced up from washing my face in the mirror to see the reflection of the blonde in question step out from the stall that he had been previously hiding in. I felt my heart stop. Oh, . Had he heard all of that just now…? All three of us froze as he held his head down low and slowly walked out in silence. As soon as the bathroom door shut Jason spun around and glared fiercely down at Aron. I shut the running water off and dashed out after him, not waiting to hear the outcome of the conversation between Jason and Aron. As I stepped out of the bathroom I glanced around like a madman, searching for JR. When I didn’t spot him in the crowd, I turned to my side and noticed that he hadn’t ran off again. Instead, he was standing right outside of the bathroom door, leaning on the wall waiting for me. I stared at him in shock. JR slowly raised his head up, a faint, pained smile spread across his lips.

“Sorry… I ran off like that…” He started to apologize. I shook my head.

“No, it’s nothing-”

“Are you ready to go?” He asked, cutting me off. It was plain as day that he was obviously uncomfortable being here. I wordlessly nodded then watched as JR nervously approached me, taking my left arm and throwing it around his neck, shifting some of my weight onto his right shoulder to help me walk. He escorted me out of the club and into the street where a taxi waited for the both of us. JR helped me climb in before entering after me, shutting the door behind him. He gave the driver my address and we took off. As the car started moving I tiredly collapsed on my right, falling onto JR’s left shoulder and startling him. I knew it was an awkward thing to do to someone I had hardly just even met, but for some reason I just felt so comfortable around him that this type of skinship just felt natural. We were friends, weren’t we? Evidently it must not have been so uncomfortable for him as I thought, seeing as how he wasn’t brushing me off of him.

“Thanks for coming for me.” I managed to reply.

“You drank again… Something must be wrong.” JR replied. I shook my head, still resting on his shoulder.

“What about you?” I asked, wanting to make sure he was okay after what had just happened.

“Me?” JR asked, shocked that I would inquire about him. I stared out of the front windshield from the backseat in the taxi.

“Don’t play dumb; you heard all of that inside of the bathroom.”

A painful smile spread across JR’s lips. “Ren… people… they’ve been talking about me behind my back my whole life. Why would it suddenly stop now?”

I pulled away from him, sitting up and staring at him with stunned eyes. “Why should it continue till now?” I asked, not understanding him. Why would he not take a stand for himself and just accept it? JR nervously fidgeted in his seat.

“Can we… talk about something else, please?” He almost pleaded, making me pause. I pursed my lips together in silence then nodded.

“Yeah… whatever you want.” I replied, not wanting to push the subject any further especially since he didn’t want to. I suddenly froze as a random sudden thought occurred to me. There was something I had forgotten to do tonight. “! I forgot to tell him!” I loudly exclaimed, even making the taxi driver jump up in his seat while JR stared at me with wide eyes.

“…Forgot?” He asked.

“Jason; I forgot to tell Jason that I’m royally screwed!”

“…What happened?” JR curiously asked.

“Jason’s flying to China for a week. During that time, I’m expected to perfect my walk. But the problem is that Minhyun and Aron, the two that are supposed to be helping me, are actually doing the opposite and trying to hinder my progress. They’ve turned all of the models against me. I literally have no one to go to for help… There’s no telling what Jason will do to me if he comes back and I’ve made zero progress.”

“I know someo-”

“I’m so screwed! How am I supposed to become Jason’s next top model with the luck I have?” I drunkenly whined. JR nervously watched me.

“I-I know someo-”

“Wah-ha, why wasn’t I born lucky into this world like Minseok??? Beautiful and talented… Everyone loves him and would do anything for him. And I mean everyone. I’ve even seen a little old lady give up her seat on the bus for that man! Meanwhile, I can’t even seem to get Minhyun or Aron to like me… Ah, why me? Why my life? I should have gone to college.” I started to ramble, getting to that dark point in my state of drunkenness where I started to rethink all of my major life choices.

“Um, Ren?” JR called out to me. I snapped out of my trance and looked at him. “I might know someone who can help you…”

My eyes suddenly lit up. “Really? You do?” I asked then laughed. “Oh, of course you would! You’re an amazing writer! Why wouldn’t you have connections to people in the fashion industry? So who is it? This person you know who could possibly help me; who is he?” I started kissing up to him and the possibility that he might actually be able to help me.

JR hesitantly paused before glancing over in the direction of the driver. He leaned forward in his seat and redirected the taxi, instructing him to take us to some other address downtown. JR sat back faintly smiled at me. “You’ll see.”

 

 

After several minutes of driving, the taxi finally came to a stop in front of dance studio. JR climbed out of the car and reached his hand out to me for me to take. I stared at it for a brief moment, a bit stunned before taking it and allowing him to help me up and out of the car. The two of us found ourselves staring at a large sign which read ‘D.B Dance.’ I glanced at JR and gave him a questioning look. He motioned for me to follow him inside, which I did. We walked through the doors to see a class already in session. I found this odd. It was already past midnight. What normal dance studio held lessons this late? And how did JR know about it? There were several young women aligned in the back of the room, following the dance routine from the tall, slim, short haired brunette dance instructor stationed at the front. As she noticed us step inside she smiled when she spotted JR. Remaining the professional she was, she continued the dance routine as she called out to him.

“I’ll be with you in just a minute!!!” She happily exclaimed, waving her arms to the routine. The two of us stood at the back of the room and waited until the song was over. As it ended, she approached us. I couldn’t help but keep my eyes glued to her; she was absolutely stunning. She had the slender frame and the gorgeous face of a model with her soft features. For a second I almost felt intimidated by her. She smiled at me and held her hand out for me to take, which I shook. “JR, did you bring me a new student???” She asked.

JR shook his head. “Dambi noona, I have a favor to ask of you.” He said. Dambi tilted her head to the side and gave him a questioning look.

“Hmm? What’s that?” She asked in almost a sing-song voice. JR pointed at me.

“He’s… my friend. He needs to learn how to walk.”

She pouted. “Walking? That’s no fun… How about we dance instead?” She asked, grinning at me. JR shook his head again.

“Please do me this favor?” He asked. Dambi laughed, placing both hands on her hips.

“Of course I’ll do it!” She replied. My eyes lit up. Act cool, Ren. Don’t act stupid. Don’t let her know you’re drunk out of your mind. She’s willing to help you. Don’t chase her away.

“Really? You can do it?” I asked, still in my state of trying to sober up.

“Of course! It’s not that hard. Besides, anything for this little cutie.” She patted JR on his head, rubbing his hair. He winced. I stared at them.

“How do the two of you know each other?” I asked, stumbling over practically nothing and trying to retain my balance. Luckily she didn’t seem to notice… or rather, she did, but she chose not to acknowledge it.

“JR is my student! And… we’re old classmates. We went to the same high school way back when. Though I graduated first. He’s like my little brother; I take care of him. And what’s this? Friend?” She blinked, as if startled by the fact that JR actually had a friend. She smiled. “Any friend of JR’s is a friend of mine…?” She asked, fishing for my name.

“Ren. Choi Ren.” I replied. Did she say student? Did JR take dance classes here? How interesting. Each time I forced my presence on him, I seemed to learn more about the blonde. So he wasn’t as much of a shut in as I originally thought. But he said it himself; he only went to the fashion shows then went home. He never mentioned dance classes. It wasn’t that he lied, he just didn’t tell the whole truth. Why would he choose to leave that part out? Was it embarrassing to him? Dance wasn’t embarrassing, at least to me. I envied those who could. I was a decent dancer, but I wouldn’t necessarily break out in random dance to impress others. I was curious to see how well of a dancer JR was now.

“Such a pretty name, Ren. Sure, I can teach you. I had my runway days too. Now I’m past that and run a dance studio, returning to my roots.”

So she was a former model? I knew it. “Roots?”

Dambi grinned. “Ballet. I’ve been dancing since I was old enough to walk. But enough about me. You want to be a model, Ren?” She asked. I nodded.

“Actually… I’ve already been signed. But I need to improve my walk.” I slightly slurred my speech as I spoke. Dammit. Please don’t tell me she noticed that small slip up…

She raised a brow. “Already been signed? Without having a decent enough walk? What crazy designer would agree to such terms?”

“JA Style’s Jason.” I replied. Her face went blank.

“I believe it.” She didn’t miss a beat.

“He casted me from the street. He even went so far as to chase me. He said he wanted me, so that’s why he signed me without having seen my walk first.” I explained my crazy first encounter with said designer. She nodded.

“You definitely have the looks. I can see why he did it… but still, it doesn’t make it any less crazy. Alright then, Ren. Not only am I going to improve your walk, I’m going to perfect it.” She said then reached for her water bottle sitting on the ground.

“I only have a week.” I replied as she took a sip. She almost choked then coughed to clear .

“Excuse me?”

I shifted my gaze down to the ground, still struggling to keep my balance. Why JR thought it was a good idea to bring me here straight from the party was a mystery in itself. “I’m sorry. I should have told you this first-”

She held up her hand, cutting me off. “Doesn’t matter. Challenge accepted. Be here every day for the next week by 10 AM. Be ready to work your off. And one more thing, cut down on the drinking. I won’t work with someone who can’t even walk normally, let alone try to teach them how to walk professionally. Understand?”

I sheepishly nodded after being called out on my current state. “I understand.”

She smiled. “Good.” She said then shifted her attention to JR. “And you, mister! Start coming back to class! The girls miss you.” She replied. JR hesitantly glanced over in the direction of the three women in the corner of the room.

“You got that right! We’ve had to make do without our only male classmate!” One girl replied from the background. As she spoke, JR noticeably shook before looking away from her. As Dambi noticed his odd response, she turned around.

“Lizzy, please don’t chase him off again. We’re trying to get him to start coming back.” Dambi pouted then turned back around to face him. “Nana, Lizzy and Raina would love to have you back.”

JR uncomfortably shifted his gaze to the ground. “Maybe… I’ve been… busy lately…” I stared at JR. Had something happened here, and that was the reason why he hadn’t seemed to have gone back for a while? I made a mental note to inquire about this at a later time.

“I see that! Busy making friends! Don’t forget about your friends here at the studio as well, ok? Don’t be a stranger and come back anytime!” She then waved goodbye. JR nodded then bowed before awkwardly turning around and leaving. I thanked Dambi then quickly followed out after him. Once we were out of there he seemed to be relieved.

“You dance?” I asked as JR tried to wave down another taxi but failed. He kept his gaze focused forward.

“Sometimes.” He murmured.

“Why didn’t you say so? That’s really cool!” I replied, trying to reassure him that it was okay for him to like something as dance. Tons of guys danced. We wouldn’t have male idols if guys didn’t dance, now would we? Though I could hardly see JR being one of those idols. At least not in a serious light. He’d probably be the awkward shy one of the group, aka, the one that everyone wonders how in the world they passed the audition. JR glanced at me through the corners of his eyes as he tried once again to hail down a cab.

“It’s only something I do on occasion…”

“Why only occasion?” I asked.

“I don’t leave my apartment often… It takes… it takes courage to leave whenever I’m not on an assignment.” He replied, stunning me and making me somewhat regret asking him. It took courage each day to leave his place? But… why? I didn’t understand. Was there something he was afraid of on the outside world? Or was he just that comfortable within the confines of his apartment? I forced a smile on my face, despite the awkward position I just put myself in.

“Really? You’ve been out a lot these days, it seems.” I replied, digging my hands into my front pockets. JR nodded, still not looking at me.

“Yes. That’s because of you.”

I paused, staring at him with wide eyes after being completely taken off guard by his response. I pointed my index finger at myself and blinked. “Me?” For some reason my heart started racing, completely startling me. I lowered my hand back down to my side and stared down at my chest, wondering what the heck was going on with me just now. Was this a side effect of the alcohol? It must have been. I drank myself sick tonight. That’s what it was…

JR finally turned to face me. He had a confused look written across his face. “You’ve called me out each night, haven’t you?”

My heart started to calm down. I nervously laughed. “Ah-hah, right! Stupid me; I’ve been senselessly burdening you ever since Jason’s fashion show. I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to force myself on you.” I replied, a bit embarrassed now that I realized I had been calling him out for my own selfish reasons, not once really thinking about him or if he was busy. JR gave me a surprised look.

“Burden? Force?” He asked before shaking his head immediately. “It’s true that you’ve been calling me out each night, but… I don’t mind.”

I stared at him. “Really? Are you sure?”

JR smiled then nodded. “I’m… happy.”

I paused, feeling my heart start to race again. I continued to stare at him with a serious look on my face. “Why are you happy, JR?” I asked. JR glanced up into the dark night sky.

“Because… it feels nice to finally be called on.” He replied, making my heart switch from racing too fast to aching for him. Had no one really called on him before just to meet up and hang out? Just what were these people that surrounded his life up until this point? JR continued. “So I don’t mind… if you don’t mind. Please, continue to call me out.” He said rather awkwardly, turning away from me in embarrassment while scratching the back of his head. I smiled, a bit touched.

“Are you sure you want someone as problematic and troublesome as me in your company?” I .

“You’re not problematic or troublesome… at least, I never thought so.”

I laughed. “Now I know you’re just trying to be nice to me. Shall I remind you that I shoved your head through my wall? There’s no need for you to be nice to me now.”

JR shyly laughed. “It’s not that big of a deal.”

I blinked. “Are you kidding me? I knocked you unconscious.”

“It was funny.” He replied. “Besides… I can’t… hold it against you if I find it funny myself.”

I sighed in relief. This guy was a saint! “I’m so glad you feel that way, because I have a feeling that this won’t be the last time I cause you physical misfortune. I’m completely unlucky in life and a complete klutz. I’m just warning you now. If you can put up with that, then I’m certain we’ll become the best of friends.”

JR smiled. “I… can. I’m not so graceful myself.” He joked. In my still intoxicated state, I laughed probably harder than I should have. He gave me a startled look when I reacted as if he had just told the funniest joke in the world.

“I’m so sorry, I’m still not all quite here. Can I go home now?” I apologized for my atrocious behavior tonight. I felt terrible about everything that had happened. I hated that I called him out and put him into that awkward situation when he first arrived at the club and everyone stared at him. I should have known that a place like that, especially surrounded by intimidating people like Aron and Minhyun, would be a terrible idea. I also felt horrible about the conversation that he had heard between Aron and Jason. Although that was none of my doing, I still felt awful for it. If I had never called him out, he would have never had to have been hurt. He said he didn’t mind all that happened, but how could I believe him on this? He’d have to not be human not to feel hurt or pain. But looking at him now, he seemed fine, as if everything had simply just passed right by him. There was something strange about this guy. But, if I hadn’t called him out, I would have never found someone on my own to teach me how to walk, would I? I walked over to JR and approached him from behind, happily wrapping my arms around him and resting the side of my face on his back. “You’re so awesome, friend!”

JR flinched but remained silent. Finally a cab pulled up on the side of the road and he helped me inside first before climbing in after me. JR redirected the cab to my address. As the car took off, the calm, smooth ride was enough to put me into a trance before putting me to sleep. Once unconscious, I fell to my right and landed in JR’s lap. After that, I had no idea what happened during the timeframe it took to get back home. All I could recall was JR dragging me out of the backseat of the car and up the stairs to my apartment complex. Once in front of my doorstep, JR took the keys that dangled from my pocket and started alternating between them, sticking them into the lock until he found the one that fit. He unlocked the door and helped me inside, leading me into my room. The two of us walked past the still visible hole in the wall from earlier and he laid me down on my bed on my back. Once I was down, I heard him sigh heavily in relief. I drunkenly stuck my arms out in the air and spread them widely.

“House of Kim~! You’re so mysterious! You’re such a pain!!!” I exclaimed. JR awkwardly paused and glanced down at me in silence. I pointed at several of the magazine cutouts on my walls. “The hell I’m going through just to catch a glimpse of you!”

“I should leave.” JR started to excuse himself, only I wasn’t having it. I sat up on the bed, my brown hair a disheveled mess.

“Although it’s hell… it’s worth it.” I glanced over at JR. “Has there ever been someone you so badly wanted to meet?”

JR paused. “…No.”

“No one???” I asked in shock. “You mean to tell me that there’s no one in this world you would do the impossible for just for a moment of their time?”

He stared at me. “It’s just a clothing brand. Does it really mean that much to you?”

I nodded with a drunken smile on my face. “House of Kim’s designs… make me happy. When you live on your own and away from your family and friends, you realize that there’s very little to be happy about… But when you find that one thing that can turn even the crappiest day into a good one, you tend to stick with it and before you know it, you’re able to smile again and find happiness in each day. To me… that’s what House of Kim is. But… House of Kim is like a star up in the sky. Beautiful to look at, almost impossible to reach for.”

“That one thing…” JR’s voice trailed off. “I think I can understand what you mean by that.”

I tilted my head to the side. “Eh? Do you have something that makes you happy?”

JR smiled at me and shook his head. “I was just saying… I understand.” He shrugged, digging his hands into his hoodie pockets and dodging the question. “I should get going… Try to get some rest and… take care, Ren.” He quietly responded. I nodded then tiredly fell backwards into the bed. I heard him travel down the hallway and open and shut the front door behind him. I let my eyes fall shut, not worrying about locking up. It wasn’t like I had anything that anyone would want to steal anyways, and it was a decent enough neighborhood to not have to worry about a thing like home invasion. I rested my head back into my soft pillows, a smile on my face. Until now, I had been secretly lonely. Since signing under JA Style, that loneliness became ever so evident, being labeled an outcast the moment I stepped inside of that office. But I took it all in stride. I was a happy-go-lucky type of guy and so I didn’t dwell on the typical loneliness I felt and found myself distractions so that I wouldn’t have to. But… now I wasn’t so alone anymore. And neither was JR.

 

 

JR’s POV

As I stepped inside of the comfort of my own familiar apartment, I blankly stared at the messy living room completely covered in rolls of fabric and scattered pieces of paper with outfit designs on them. After locking the door behind me, I walked over to my work table situated in the middle of the living room and sat down on the floor. I glanced over at the hanging fabric from a blazer in my sewing machine that I had been previously working on before Ren had called me out of my apartment. As I reached for it in efforts to pick up where I had left off, I winced as my ears were suddenly assaulted by the loud sound of a ringing bell. I shrieked then immediately brought both hands over my ears, tightly covering them. After a few seconds of holding my ears I slowly lowered my hands, bringing them down to my lap. I cautiously turned my head, looking in all directions, my heart racing inside of my chest. I pursed my lips together when I once again realized that there wasn’t a ringing bell inside of my apartment. It was inside of my head. I hastily shot up to my feet and traveled to my room, grabbing a pair of large headphones and placing them over my ears. I plugged in my mp3 player, listening to the ambient sounds of nature that I frequently used whenever something like this happened.

I walked back into my living room and collapsed onto my couch, laying down on my stomach and resting the side of my face against the left armrest. I furrowed my brows. When would this just… stop? It’s already been six years… I tightly shut my eyes, trying to allow myself to relax despite having a million thoughts racing across the back of my mind. In a faraway distance I could still hear that traumatizing bell. I quickly sat up and shook my head hysterically. I grabbed at both sides of my face, trying to retain my sanity. I suddenly thought back to when Ren had said in his drunken state that House of Kim was a mysterious, unreachable star. I winced in pain as my head started to ache. What was Ren talking about earlier? He… wanted to meet House of Kim? I lowered both hands and sullenly stared down at my sewing machine on my work table across from me.

“Why would anyone want to meet with someone like me…?” I spoke aloud, my voice quietly trailing off as I failed to come up with a logical reason why anyone would want anything to do with a shut-in like myself. All I was good at was designing clothes… It was something that I enjoyed and it brought me happiness… but I was terrified of it at the same time. All of the unwanted attention it brought in when my designs had finally become noticed… I didn’t want any of it. I agreed to put my designs out on the market, but I refused to take any credit for my own work. The spotlight… I didn’t want it. In fact, I wanted the exact opposite. I didn’t want people to even so much as look at me. I just wanted to exist without really existing. Everywhere I went, I always traveled with my head held down in hopes that no one would notice me. Of course no one ever did. And I was ok with that. I was ok with my mundane existence. I was ok with being the ghost designer behind House of Kim if that meant that I could stay out of the public’s eye and people wouldn’t talk about me. Besides, it was difficult enough going outside to write articles for the fashion blog that I worked part time under. It wasn’t that I needed the money. I just needed to have a purpose and do something different aside from sketching and sewing all day. But it seemed that everywhere I went, people seemed to stare and talk about me. The runway shows, that party…

I felt the corners of my eyes start to water up. I took a deep breath to calm myself. Everyone thought I was so immune to all of the harsh words around me… but it hurt. It stung deeply. I couldn’t even imagine the things people would say if they ever discovered who I truly was… but that would never happen. I’d never allow it to. This miniscule life of mine… I was content with the idea of never achieving fame or recognition for any of my work if it meant that I could hide away like this forever. At least here in the confines of my apartment, no one judged me. No one laughed or poked fun at me. I was all alone… and I was happy… wasn’t I? At least… I thought I was. Ever since running into Ren at JA Style’s runway show, I had been a lot busier than usual. I was running around more now than I had been in the last several years. Although he was strange and I was initially hesitant to trust him, he seemed… different than all of the others. He seemed genuinely… nice. He had plenty of opportunities to treat me the same way everyone else did outside, but he didn’t… And he kept calling me, not for money, but for my company. Although he admitted to feeling like he was burdening me with all of his problems, I didn’t see it that way… For once in a very long time someone was actually confiding in me, trusting me with all of their worries and troubles. For once I felt valued as a person…

I was suddenly torn away from my thoughts as my phone rang. I fumbled through my hoodie pocket and grabbed my phone, reading the name across the screen. I stared at it for a brief second before removing my headphones and hesitantly answering. “Jason…?” I asked, wondering why he could be calling me at this hour.

“Sorry for calling this late; I barely just made it back to my apartment as well. Don’t you worry about that jackass, Kwak. I put him in his place.”

I shook my head. “Don’t worry about it… really. It’s not worth it.”

Jason sighed heavily. “There you go again. That’s why your self-esteem is so low. If you fail to see your own self-worth, do you think anyone else will ever see it too?”

“Don’t tell me you called just to check up on me…” I protested.

“And if I did?”

“I’ll send you money to pay for your wasted phone call.”

“Kim Jonghyun!” Jason scolded. “Don’t say that… it’s not a waste of a phone call… never. I mean, come on. I’d like to think of us as being friends. After all, you were the one who helped me get my foot in the door in the fashion industry. If it weren’t for you, I would have never been able to see my creations walk down the runway. And haven’t I helped you? I got you that job at that blog because you said that you were bored and I’ve also helped you keep your secret. Can’t you at least call me your friend too?” He asked, sounding hurt.

“I’m sorry…” My voice trailed off. “But I’ve already burdened you with so much already. I can’t possibly burden you more.”

“So it’s ok to burden my model then, is it?” Jason asked, a bit annoyed. I stared down at the floor.

“It’s… different.”

“Really?” He sounded intrigued. “And why is that?”

A small smirk spread across my lips. “Because… he causes just as much trouble as I do.”

“I can attest to that.” Jason laughed. “He’s hopeful, but he has two left feet, I swear!”

“Did… did you really call to check up on me or was it to ask about Ren?”

Jason pouted. “How dare you make me jealous of that kid.” He sighed. “Both. To be honest, I was actually somewhat hoping that you two might meet. He’s a good kid, so far.”

“But…” My voice uncomfortably trailed off.

“Hmm?”

“He says… he wants to meet House of Kim.”

Jason paused. “Do you think that’ll be a problem?”

“Of course!” I stammered. “I can’t go outside and face the world like this!”

“Even though the two of you have already met? What makes admitting to him that you’re House of Kim anymore different? You’re still the same person.”

“He’s probably… expecting someone great. Not me.” I replied dejectedly. Jason sighed.

“Well that’s not good. I already promised him that he could meet you.” He replied. My eyes grew wide.

“What?!” I stammered. What did he just say? “W-why would you do that?! After all that I’ve done for you! Jason!” Every inch of me practically screamed in protest. How could he do this to me? How could he make a promise that he couldn’t keep? It wasn’t just unfair to me, but it was unfair to Ren as well. This was just one arrangement I couldn’t agree to make. Jason was asking far too much from me.

Jason’s line went quiet for a moment. “He wouldn’t have signed the contract otherwise… and I really wanted him. You really can’t do it, can you?” He asked. “… I already made a promise to him that you would meet with him the day we finally did another collaboration together… You can’t help me out just this once?”

“Jason!”

“Alright. I understand. I’ll take care of it.” Jason replied, taking me by surprise.

“What…? What do you mean by that?” I asked worriedly.

“When the time comes, you’ll know. Right now another collaboration is far, far off. I have business to take care of in China in the meantime, not to mention I have several custom designs to be working on. I’m sure you’ll be a busy man in the foreseeable future too, right? Let’s talk about joining forces towards the later portion of the year, alright?”

“I don’t understand any of that… Jason, what are you planning to do?”

“I promised him he’d meet Mr. Kim. I have to keep that promise.”

“And how are you planning to do that? Jason, please, tell me something!” I replied anxiously.

“Since you won’t step out as Mr. Kim, then how would you feel about someone else stepping out for you…?”

I paused. “Someone else…?”