JIYONG'S POV

Seeing her here in the club, giving a strong front, makes me confused. Why does it seem that she's not even affected seeing me with another girl? Did she not love me at all? A thousand questions ran through my head. So many time I have tried to get closer to her, but only to be pushed away. I know she is not comfortable with public affection, but what I did in front of the cameras or the audience were not even enough to scream that we are a couple. Why does she keep pushing me away but yet answering every interview about her celebrity fanboys?

My thoughts get distracted when I felt Kiko placed her hand on my arm as a sign of comfort. The past few months she has been a listening ear to me. She too was experiencing a rocky relationship with another Japanese model at that time, hence she understands what I feel. The heartache felt whenever fans pair your other half with another celebrity they deemed compatible or perfect even. Having multiple social media platforms made me aware of what the fans are saying about us. Everyone says that she is too good for me, too innocent to be with someone who has had multiple scandals.

I turned to smile at Kiko to show her that I am fine and gulped down a shot of vodka. I was ready to answer her when I saw Top hyung hugging her and patted her head. Since when did they get so close? Why did they pretended to be awkward with one another in front of us? Is he the reason why she's been pushing me away? Unbelievable. Has she been playing me all along? Is this what you call innocent and pure? I snorted. 

"Come on, G. Top has been your friend for more than 5 years already, I doubt he will do such things to you." I felt Kiko soothing my back and handed me another glass of vodka. After introducing Kiko to her, I pulled Kiko for a dance. I need to forget the scene earlier and Kiko is one of thew few who is able to help me with that. Thankfully she is used to these kind of parties since she too need to socialise in order for people to recognise her. The entertainment industry is not a bed of roses as fans think it is. As I felt the alcohol in my system, I put my hands on her waist and began to move together with her hips. We both have always felt the physical attraction between us but have never pursued it as we respect the fact that we have, or had, someone else in our lifes. But like I said, we had too many drinks earlier on and I felt Kiko put her arms around my neck and started grinding into me. It felt good, to be wanted by someone. As I roamed my hands lower to her hips, my eyes darted around to see Top pulling Dara away to a staircase. Kiko must have felt my body stiffened as she too broke away from the trance and guilt was plastered on her face.

"Ohmygod, G. I swear.. I have no idea why I did that... I..." Her face was flushed with embarassment, and confusion. "This is not right G. I know there is something between us but I'm not going to explore it further. Not especially after Sen just left me to go back with Ikumi-chan. And you... Dara loves you. I see it in her face just now. I don't know why she has been pushing you away but there must be a good reason for that.. I'm sorry."

There, finally the line has been drawn. Everytime I ran away from Dara, I went to Kiko straight. I even flew overseas just to see her. I admit at times the line gets blurry for us, especially when alcohol is involved, but we have never slept together. We have been a source of comfort for each other. No one understands me better than her. I can say that she is my female counterpart, an uprising star often misunderstood by the reporters and the public. People termed us as wild when it's our way of releasing stress and forgetting our woes. Releasing a deep breathe, I held her hands and placed a kiss on her forehead as a sign of gratitude and mouthed thank you.

I ran to the staircase where I saw Seunghyun hyung dragged Dara to. What are they doing together that they need to head to the rooftop during a party? As I got nearer to the top of the stairs, I heard Dara shouting at Hyung followed by her sobbing. Then I heard it.

".. Were you even ready to be in a relationship when you agreed to be with him?" I was confused, what's going on? Why does it sound like Hyung knows more about the problems that Dara is facing when it should be me? As much as I anticipated an answer from Dara, all I heard was her asking Hyung to heal her, to save her from the misery.

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For those who did not know who Sen is, he is a Japanese model. I have started liking him since years ago and was secretly rooting for him and Kiko. A pity he already has a girlfriend though!