Aom Amm’s POV

I have never thought that to be in love with somebody could be this great. I couldn’t describe it by words but the feeling is just too real and it is just so wonderful. To know that the one you love is loving you with all her heart, insisting to love you even if you gave her thousands doubts and uncertainties, I am just too lucky to meet a person like Kim. Little did I  realize since when the fall happened but all I know, I am in love with this tom. Yes, she is a tom and I never thought about it too. She didn’t do much things that actually attract my heart to her. Kim is basically a simple person with pure and sincere heart. Everything she did, every single stuffs she said, all came from the kindness inside her true self. She made me thrilled  whenever she texted me  with simple text like “GOOD MORNING BEAUTIFUL” in the morning yet I felt sad when she said “GOOD NIGHT” before we went to bed. I just don’t want our conversation to stop and that, I hope  morning will come again a little bit faster.

Today is a bit different from my previous days. I woke up in the morning just to find myself curled up securely in a warm embrace of my love, Kimhan Jittaleela. Last night, we talked a lot and then I don’t even realize when we fell asleep. Kim is still sleeping and she sleeps like a baby. I look up to her face. We have never been this close before. I can see her face clearly. Kim has a thick eyebrows, pointed nose, I could say that her lips are much softer than mine and her perfect jaw is my favorite. Admiring her good looking from in a close distance, I saw her lips curled into a smile. I wonder what is she dreaming about. Am I present in her dreamland? Maybe. I traced my finger to her smiling lips just to find she’s grinning like lunatic. I really wonder what is happening in her dream.

“Pie..” The name blurted from Kim’s mouth. I could hear it clearly and my hearing is no doubt so wrong. I was hoping that I am the one who made her smile even in her sleep but all I get is a false hope. Kim mentioned the name of her late wife, Pie. I am not sure how should I feel about it. Should I feel disappointed? Should I feel mad with it? Or should I just pretend that I know nothing? Before me, she has ever madly in love with another woman and see how madly in love they were. They got married and even have their own child. I happen to come to Kim’s life not as her first love. Tell me how should I react about it? Nobody could give me the concrete answer.

Slowly as not to awake Kim, I remove her hands from me and rolled on my back to her side. “It was just a dream.” I tried to composed myself. I am jealous. I envy how she still so deep in love with her late wife. Reminiscing how we met a long months ago, I just remembered she even thought that I am her Pie. How would ever get rid off this feeling. I am not supposed to be envious her late wife because what has gone, is gone but I couldn’t help myself of not too.

            “Morning.” My moment of contemplation was disturbed with the voice that I long for. Kim is awake. She rolled on her side and facing me. I didn’t notice that I had move a bit far from her. She smiled to me with her usual temptating charm.

            “Morning.” All I can do is smiling back to Kim. Perhaps the smile is not really for me. It was because the dream she had in her sleep. The written happiness in her face didn’t mean for me be with her.

            “You’re such an early bird.” Kim snuggled close to me and curled her arms around my waist.

            “I just woke up too. Five minutes earlier than you.” I said to her not even seeing Kim into her eyes. I know Kim is staring to me. I just pretend not to know. Actually it is more than five minutes. The minutes that I have witnessed how wonderful her dream  with her Pie.

            “Someone is not in the mood this morning. Did I forget something?” Kim tried to attract my attention to her. She really get to use to read my facial expression. I think she had learnt hard about me.

            “I’m fine.” I said to Kim.

            “No, you’re not.” Kim suddenly went on top of me out of my expectation. She made me startle and at the same time nervous.

            “Good morning beautiful.” Kim said to me and it is not ended just like that. when I am about to respond to her, Kim’s soft lips touched mine. Kim kissed me so gently and tenderly as if I am a so fragile. I can’t help myself. I love it when Kim kissed me and I happened to give in willingly.

            “Who said you can kiss me?” I gasped when Kim parted her lips from mine. I saw she bites her lips and it makes me want her kiss for more.

            “I’m sorry.” Kim’s facial expression changed tremendously. Perhaps my words has made she felt so guilty. I like it to see Kim like that. It is the time for me to instead. She loves to tease me previously and I take this oppurtinity as a revenge of her silly doings to me.

            “Are you alright?” Kim asked me. I don’t know how it is related to the kiss but I found it amusing.

            “I am never fine when I am with you.” I said to Kim in a one sharp line. It made Kim startled even more. She must be confused with my sudden change.

            “You hurt me.” I added.

            “What did I do wrong to you?” Kim brought herself to sit on the bed. She pulled my hands so that I could sit too. We faced each other. Kim looked serious.

            “You hurt me because you cause me to fall again and again.” I can’t hide my smile for now.

            “Fall in love again and again with you.” My last statement turned Kim’s gloomy face bright. Kim shook her head. My joke really hit her in the face.

            “Oww..naughty girl!” Kim pinched my nose and apparently drew me close to her, making me straddle on her lap. I’m getting used to this too.

            “Afraid?” I asked Kim to reassure that I really made to .

            “I just thought that you have a PMS, you know..Girls problem every month.” Kim shrugged and showed her innocent face to me.

            “Do you want to say I often have that mood swing thingy when I’m on my menstruation?” I hit her shoulder purposely.

            “I could say so.” Kim nodded slowly.

            “You have learnt so much about me.” I admit that what Kim said is true. I will have that bad mood and what not any abdominal pain when the red moon comes.

            “I do.” Kim caressed my face with her long slender finger.

“But I haven’t put enough effort to learn about you.” I touched her hands as she cupped my face. Yes, I don’t even make an enough effort yet to know more about Kim. Most of the time I was so confused with my feeling towards Kim until it reached the point when suddenly Van is back to interfere my life, I realize I was too afraid to lose Kim.

“We will have a plenty time to learn about each other. Just like I have always told you, I don’t like to force. Let it happens naturally.” Kim said to me with her calm tone. Kim always knows how to make me feel right and good. One thing that I have always admire about Kim is she is so patient and rational in every situation. Put an exception when Sushar was kidnapped by Van. That was so serious where no parents wouldn’t fret if that happened to their children.

“How are you so sure about it?” I couldn’t look into Kim’s eyes whenever I thought about this. I hide my face to the crook of her neck, curling my hands around her skinny frame.

“And what made you not sure about it?” Instead answering me, Kim redirected the question to me.

I don’t even know how would I explain the mess in my mind right now. She deserved to know but I am not ready yet to reveal it to Kim.

“I know you have something to tell me. Take your time, love. I won’t force you.” Kim said. I love it when she my back and hug me even tighter in her arms. It feels so safe.

“Thank you.” That’s all I can say at this moment.

We stay in that position for few minutes. I’m so deep into my own thought while Kim never get tired of soothing me.