Hae In’s POV

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I swore it had been the hundredth time I had called Jun Hyung ever since we met at the café. I was fed up with him not picking up my calls but now I couldn’t even get through his phone. I was getting very anxious. I even checked the news whether he was involved in some accident or something but he was fine.

I guessed Jun Hyung was deliberately avoiding me. I left another message for him, “Jun Hyung. I don’t know what’s going on but please call me back to show that you’re okay.”

I was wondering whether he was really okay after that day. He seemed perfectly fine. I sighed. I was packing my luggage and my clothes were spread all over my floor. Min Yeong came into the room and sobbed. Min Yeong was one of the reasons that I could survive in Korea. She was of a great help and now she would be alone in this house when I was to leave tomorrow.

“I have no one to talk to when you leave tomorrow…” She choked in her words and hugged me. I hugged her back and her back gently to comfort her.

I released her and looked into her eyes with concern, “You can always give me a call or talk to me over the internet, silly. Please take care of yourself when I’m gone, Min Yeong.” I repeated the same old words like a naggy grandmother. However, she was never annoyed at me. She nodded profusely and gripped both of my hands.

She left the room to allow me to finish packing my stuff and I received a message on my phone.

From Jun Hyung

Sorry, I’ve been really busy.

I was elated that he was able to reply me. I texted him back quickly.

Finally you responded! I’m so worried. Jun Hyung, I’m going off tomorrow. Remember you said you will consider sending me off? Are you free tomorrow?

Please say yes. Please say yes!

Sorry, I have a radio schedule tomorrow. I can’t send you off. Take care, Hae In.

My smile fell as I saw his very short answer. He was normally very cheery in his texts but this time, no. It was short and clear that he didn’t want to send me off. Nevertheless, I replied him.

Oh, take care of yourself, Jun Hyung. I know you have a busy schedule. I understand. Goodnight.

-

“Hae In, are you ready?” Ji Hoon’s voiced echoed from the main door. I was still in my room checking that I hadn’t left anything behind. Min Yeong wasn’t at home since she was already in school. She bawled out her eyes last night because she couldn’t send me off.

“I’m ready!” I answered him quickly and dragged my bag to meet Ji Hoon at the door. Before closing the door, I took one last glance at the lovely house that I had stayed. I sniffed as the reality sank in quickly that I was going to leave Korea right now, “Goodbye.”

Ji Hoon booked a taxi so we could head off to the airport quickly. I was sitting in the taxi with my head facing the window, admiring the tall buildings and greenery of Korea. Korea was definitely different from States and I had to take a second look before I headed to the States. I missed Korea already.

At that moment, the taxi driver the radio. Some song was playing before the radio host started talking, “Hello and good morning my listeners. Today we have BEAST members on our radio live and before this, we have mentioned that Yong Jun Hyung has a surprise ready for all listeners out there.”

Jun Hyung?

He wasn’t lying about the radio schedule after all. My ears perked up as I heard his name. “Mister, would you mind turning up the volume a little?” I asked him politely and he obliged.

“Yes. Today I have a song prepared.” Jun Hyung answered the host confidently.

“Oh, are you going to rap a song?” The host asked him.

“No, I’ll be singing.” Jun Hyung chuckled and was embarrassed.

The host was shocked and gasped, “Jun Hyung is going to sing? That’s a rare sight. Is it a special message to someone out there?”

“As a matter of fact,” Jun Hyung started stuttering, “Yes. Yes, I’m dedicating this song to someone special in my heart.” My heartbeat literally stopped for a moment when I heard that he was dedicating a song to someone. Jun Hyung took a deep breath and continued, “Today, she finally receives the happiness that she deserves and I wish she would stay happy forever. She’s been an important person in my life and will always be.”

I grabbed the seat tightly as I heard his words on the radio. I was certain he was talking about me and I was very eager to hear the song he was going to dedicate.

“The song I’m singing today is… Words That Are Hard To Say by Lee Seung Gi.” Jun Hyung ended off his talking.

Jun Hyung’s POV

I put on the headphones and stood up. The music started to signal me to start singing. I took the microphone off the microphone stand and held it to my lips. I started singing the first part.

Though we're breaking up and I won't ever see you again
Let me ask one last favor.
The only thing that I can do for you who's filled with tears,
is to let you go with ease.

This song was perfect for me, or rather for us right now. I predicted Hae In would be on her way to the airport right now. I was letting her go with ease. I was being cold to her so the separation wouldn’t be as hard as expected.

These words are a bit awkward and so hard to say to you
who's so like me and to him who isn't me.

I was choking with heartbreak as I continued to the next part of the song. Even the lyrics fitted so perfectly with the situation right now.

I hope that you erase all the memories of love and
memories of thankfulness and even my tears.
Don't hurt anymore and don't turn around
just live happily from now on.

I felt the tears overwhelming in my eyes but I held it in me. I wouldn’t want to cry in the middle of the song now. I took in a deep breath as Hae In’s face flashed across my mind so distinctly and my heart skipped a beat.

I knew a long time ago that a love other than me, had
taken all for your heart.

I don't want to say these to you who's so like me
and to him who isn't me, no matter how hard I try.

It was true. No matter how hard I tried, I knew that in Hae In’s heart, Ji Hoon mattered the most. I was there for her for a few months but Ji Hoon was there for her for three years. What was I to her? Nothing. Nothing at all.

I hope that you erase all the memories of love and
memories of thankfulness and even my tears.
Don't hurt anymore and don't turn around
just live happily from now on.

Don't be sorry; don't regret it because he's going to
treat you so much better than I could.
Because this separation would be good for me if you'd just smile
and forget me completely inside his embrace.

I was confident about it. I knew Ji Hoon was going to treat her well better than I was. I told myself it was just infatuation on our parts. We were lonely and found company among each other. The person she truly loved was Ji Hoon, not me. She would forget about her feelings for me once she got there.

It'll be okay, I'll get used to it no matter
how hard it is to love alone.
Because I'll just keep you inside of my heart as you
leave and turn around.

That’s exactly what I was doing now. I would just keep Hae In inside of my heart as her. I would just leave and turn around.