“Hyesun-ah let’s start over, okay?” The words kept playing in Hyesun’s mind since after the incident. The incident which she gave in to his kiss and the incident which she involuntaraly nodded to what he was proposing.

Hyesun didn’t know either she was thinking straight or was it just her instinct that she accepted Kai back. After years of trying to scratch off the scar that he had left in her, Hyesun didn’t know whether accepting Kai would even make the scar disappear but, the moment he asked to start over she just said ‘okay’.

Things were awkward after recess, Hyesun just kept silent the whole period. Kai nudged her shoulder from time to time trying to get her attention but she just shrugged it away.

Hyesun was reconsidering either she would really want to start over with him, although she already accepted the offer just now.

The last bell rang and students were scattered all over packing their stuff and making an exit. Yoomi, Sehun and Tao had left since they knew that Hyesun would be going back with Kyungsoo as usual.

“Hyesun-ah, I’ll walk you home.” Kai stated as he packed his books. Hyesun just nodded as an okay. She wouldn’t want to hurt Kai’s feeling since she was the one had accepted his feelings. Not to mention she too still has feelings for him.

* * *

“Bye guys,” Kyungsoo patted Baekhyun’s shoulder and waved goodbye to his bestfriends before leaving the class.

Chen and Baekhyun just eyed him off. “Wah, he’s getting very anxious since recess,” Chen shook his head.

“I know right, he said that he’s going to confess today,” Baekhyun slide his sling back over his shoulder, “Come on, let’s go.”

“Yah, don’t you want to spy on them,” Chen asked as they were walking down the hallway.

“Then where do you think we’re going?” Baekhyun raised his eyebrows pointing at Kyungsoo who was waiting by Hyesun’s classroom door.

Chen just grin, they wouldn’t want to miss the event of their life. They have been waiting for years to make Kyungsoo confessed but he wouldn’t. And now without even hoping that he would confess anymore finally he decided to.

Kyungsoo stood by the door silently as he eyed Hyesun who was silently packing her stuff and Kai who was staring at her. Kyungsoo wanted to turn away since a part of him was telling him that he wouldn’t like what he’ll be observing soon. But he stayed there.

Kai eyed Hyesun’s every moves, he could tell that her thoughts were still a mess about them being together, “Look, Hyesun-ah,” Kai lifted Hyesun’s face to face him while she was still busy packing her stuff.

“If you don't want to do this then don’t” Kai suddenly said, “I won’t force you to like me again. I’ll just keep the feelings to myself if that’s what you want.” Kai took his backpack and turned his back on her.

Suddenly Hyesun involuntarily grabbed his wrist.

“I’ve already think it through,” she fixed her eyes to the ground feeling embarrassed, “I-I want to be with you,” she startled trying to be confident with her words although a part of her was saying that something was wrong.

“I still have feelings for you Kim Jongin”

The last sentence that left Hyesun’s mouth was enough for Kyungsoo to tighten his grip on his backpack and clenched his left fist. The reality was too hard for him to accept.

Just when he thought that everything was finally going on his way, suddenly a barrier just grow separating things which seems possible before to be impossible now.

“What happened?? What happened??” Chen struggled himself in between Baekhyun and the locker.

“Shhhh,” Baekhyun shut his mouth together with his hand and watched as Kyungsoo walked away.

“Let’s go get him,” Chen got up but Baekhyun pulled him back, “No, he needs some time alone.” Baekhyun shook his head. His eyes showed sympathy. He heard the whole conversation from inside the class since the hallway was empty afterall.

Kyungsoo gritted his teeth, ruffled his hair. You’re just stupid Do Kyungsoo! He blamed himself. For being fooled with his own feelings. He blamed himself for giving in to his own feelings thinking that someone would return it.

He looked up at the sky as he was walking down the familiar path back home. Alone. Broken. Hurt.

From time to time he blinked his eyes blocking the water which was starting to form in his rich white eyes. Then he chuckled.

“Wow, who would’ve thought that I would be crying over something like this.” He talked to himself trying to run away from the sadness that slowly swallowing all his strength.

Altough he hasn’t confessed or got rejected but having the thought that there was still a chance for his feelings to be returned at this point would be ridiculous.

Without him knowing, the efforts that he did to block away the tears failed.  A stream rolled down his left cheek. But he quickly wiped it away. He already knew that Hyesun meant a lot to him but he didn’t know it would make such an impact on him.

As he was about to enter his house his phone vibrated,

Kyungsoo-ah I’m going home late,,~ don’t wait for me okay ^^

He chuckled, “You never asked me to wait for you pabo-ya,, But I would always ended up waiting.” He shoved his phone back into his pocket and throwed himself on his bed as he got in.

Then he closed his eyes. Hoping that the moment he open it the pain that was tightening in his chest would go away.

* * *

After school Kai and Hyesun went for a walk together sorting things out before Kai walked her home.

Hyesun was still startled when Kai made the first move interlacing their hands together as they walk to her house. Although they had been together before but they were too young back then now they’re in high school there’s a lot more to discover.

“Thanks for accepting me,” Kai pushed back some strands of Hyesun hair which was covering her face.

Hyesun just stood in front of her house blushing whenever they came in contact.

“I’m leaving now, see you tomorrow,”Hyesun nodded.

“Can I kiss you goodbye?” again Hyesun nodded being the obedient girl.

Kai lifted her head gazing in her eyes, “I like it when you’re being all shy when you’re with me.” Then he leaned in for a soft kiss.

“You tasted the same,” He rubbed the corner of her lips with his thumb before smirking, making Hyesun flushed.

Then Kai waved her goodbye as she entered her house.

“You never change,” Kai smirked again as Hyesun was not visible now. “Too easy to play with.”

Kai stared at Kyungsoo’s house from afar, “I’m sorry hyung, but she just grew up being so beautiful I couldn’t spare her for you.” He said from afar before turning away walking back home.

* * * *

The next morning Kyungsoo walked alone to school, it’s not like he’s avoiding Hyesun since yesterday but the moment he knocked on Hyesun’s door Mrs.Jung said that she already left.

Kai must be walking with her to school now.

What time did they get home yesterday? What were they doing together? Did he buy her lunch after school? Kyungsoo told himself not to bother himself with such questions. Then again he would always lose to his feelings. The disappointment he felt yesterday didn’t fade away.

He must be really stupid to be caring about someone who doesn’t even a little bit about what he was feeling. Even after years of being around each other is Hyesun too blind to even notice his feelings for her.

Or maybe she knew it all along but just pretended not to because she was afraid that rejecting him would make him break.

Kyungsoo tried telling himself that everything was fine, everything was expected to be that way.

The moment he knew Kai would come back, he already knew that he would lose. She was never his before too. So what is there to lose anyway?

He had survived the last decade being around her without his feelings being returned. So what is there to be sad about?

“Hye guys,” Kyungsoo greeted his friends brightly that morning. He wouldn’t let his feelings lead him to sorrow again. He decided to take control now, he must if he doesn’t want to get hurt.

“Hye,,~” Chen greeted him back brightly while Baekhyun just gave out a bright smile telling him that everything would be okay.

“What’s with him smiling like that?” Kyungsoo turned facing Chen raising an eyebrow.

“I don’t know he’s acting weird since yesterday and he won’t tell me.” Chen shrugged his shoulder. Baekhyun didn’t tell him about what he heard between Kai and Hyesun.

Because telling Chen would mean telling the whole world, because he would end up announcing it to everyone he saw.

“So, Kyungsoo how did yesterday go?” Chen asked casually as he wasn’t aware by what was happening with Kyungsoo.

Baekhyun just let out a couple of cough, “Ahh, Kyungsoo-ah do you know how to solve this?” Baekhyun suddenly flipped through his math exercise.

Kyungsoo attention was distracted from Chen to Baekhyun now, “Where??” He studied the problem.

“Ahh, wait I’ll try to solve them,” while Kyungsoo was busy calculating at the side, Baekhyun turned around to glare at Chen miming the words to not ask Kyungsoo the question.

Chen just frowned since he can’t understand what he was trying to say, Baekhyun repeated himself peeking at Kyungsoo making sure he didn’t see what they were doing.

“Here, you just have to divide the above part and…” Baekhyun quickly turned his body and faking to even understand what Kyungsoo was explaining it felt like he was just saying some alien words but Baekhyun just nodded from time to time.

* * * *

When the bell for recess rang Kyungsoo wrapped his arms around Chen and Baekhyun dragging them to their usual hangout spot.

“You’re having with recess with us again? How abour Hyesun” Chen asked earning himself a slap on the arm by Baekhyun.

“Yaa, what was that for?!” he rubbed of the pain, “Come on,,~ I’m getting hungry,” Baekhyun dragged Kyungsoo away, leaving Chen alone.

As they settled under the shading tree Chen started to ask again, “Yaa,, you haven’t tell us about how did it when with Hyesun yesterday.”

Baekhyun choked on his food, Chen was just unbelieveable. He had been trying to tell him to not ask about it, looks like he’s just dumber than Hyesun to not even understand sign language. If Chen was Hyesun it would take Kyungsoo like forever to convey the message he likes her.

“I’m done with her.” Kyungsoo answered casually with a warm smile. The other two just stared at him digesting what he just said.

“I’m letting her go now guys,” Kyungsoo repeated himself. Then he took a sip of his strawberry milk which he actually brought for Hyesun.

“Are you giving up so easily? Is this Do Kyungsoo that I supposed to be friend with?” Chen being all dramatic at the whole situation. It’s not like the first time Kyungsoo said that he was done, but this time he looked serious, sounded serious that it kind of scared them a little.

“It’s been years, I didn’t grow tired of her yet but I think she grew tired of me.” Kyungsoo chuckled. “She’s a high schooler now you can’t expect that I would be around her 24/7 when we’re not real siblings after all.”

“I have to learn to let go now, that’s the only way. Well, I can’t say that I wouldn’t be hurt but letting her go would reduce the pain right?” Kyungsoo lifted his head again staring at the blue sky and blinked his eyes from time to time.

“Sorry guys, I looked so gay right now,” he chuckled again but Baekhyun and Chen could clearly see the pain that he was trying to hide in between his chuckles and smiles as his tears started to flow.

“Just let it go,” Baekhyun patted his back. “Yeah, you’re going to be alright.” Chen added.

One could only endure so much, and Kyungsoo had reached his limits. Maybe letting go was the only thing to do.

Author's Note;

Finallyy updating,~!!! wuhoooo sorry internet is damnn slow here and currently updating both fanfic that is another one SEHUN's 'Look At Me Now' xD

and I'm having my exam next week,~!! wish me luck,,,~

and poor baby kyungsooooo T^T huhooo this fanfic gives me soo much feels Okay gotta go study now

Do Subcribe / Comment / Upvote,~!! xD