A sleeping God lay beside me. It was no dream, it was real. I have looked at his face for a long time and was fascinated. His rosy lips, his long eyelashes, his pale and flawless skin, his dark circles under his eyes, he was just perfect.

How long do you want me still staring at?

I was immediately blushing. He had noticed you all the time as I had been staring at him.

You're awake? My voice was shaking.

Do not be so shy. I've noticed everything. He turned to me our faces were only separated by a few millimetres. I felt his warm breath on my skin.

We should stand up. I was so uncomfortable in this situation. I wanted to get up out of bed but he held me back.

You really want to leave me? My heart wanted to stay but my body screamed for escape. I freed myself from his grip but he grabbed my hand and pulled me into bed again. I was lying under him trying to breathe as he pressed his soft lips on mine. It was a sweet even innocent kiss. I closed my eyes and enjoyed the moment. I was completely absorbed in this moment. That was the first moment I really enjoyed from the beginning and he went far too quickly to an end. A whining sound came out of my mouth when he broke the kiss.

Oh you want more? I nodded I wanted more from Tao even if he only play with me.

He gently caressed my neck before he bit down. The memories - they all came back. This terrible night...

NO!! I screamed hysterically. I crouched crying and breathing nervously on the bed. I had not processed everything. What have I believed? It was not all good! I rocked nervously back and forth - I looked like a lunatic.

Ann! Tao tried to wake me up from my panicked state. He shook my upper body. Ann what's going on? I tried to breathe normally again but the feeling that someone was sitting on me did not want to disappear. I could not breathe and in front my face blurred everything. Ann! Please calm down! The feeling of falling into a deep and dark hole came into my mind

T-T-Tao hold me please. He approached me again and hugged me gently. I snuggled against his chest and sobbed. The darkness has caught up with me again. Ann everything will be fine again. He my forehead, trying to calm me down. I fell asleep in his safe arms. But were they safe for me?

I woke up from a horrible nightmare. Pursued by monsters I ran through a maze for my life. It was just a dream. I blinked a few times before I opened my eyes fully. I was in my bed, but to my regret alone. Or not. As I sat up, the door opened and a wide grinning Chen came to my bed.

Where is Tao? He had promised to stay with me.

He's in town. It's about the business. I wondered what kind of businesses but I have other problems now.

Why are you here?

I should wake you up and make you breakfast. But you're already awake so here's your breakfast. He handed me a bowl of cereal and a pack of tablets.

What's that again? I took enough pills and now even more.

Do not ask me. Ask Luhan he has prescribed you this stuff. He has given me only because he seems to have to do something else. I started to read the package insert. Has a bunch of side effects.... but for what this stuff now? After thorough reading I had found it out.

I think there are antidepressants. That would make sense. After last night this was probably the best.

Why do they give you antidepressants? Was he really so unaware.

Have not you noticed it what happened after the Masked Ball?

Nope, no one knows about it. What happened? Chen looked at me questioningly actually I did not want to talk about it but it would be best for me and it would help me to process it all.

After the ball... my voice cracked I could not bring myself to say it. S- Su- Suho has me. I had tears in his eyes. And yesterday I 'm freaked out because Tao has bitten me. That was all. I was at the end tears rolled down my cheeks and I sobbed quietly.

Ann why did you tell anyone?

I thought you know it all.

No, how could Suho only? Ann I am so sorry that we have not noticed but lately we are under stress.

He wiped the tears from her face. When you smile you're much prettier. I did not try again to break into tears and forced myself to smile. Better?

Yes, and I think that you should talk to Luhan. The moment the door opened and a slightly confused Lay stood there.

Ah Chen! I was looking for you already in the whole house. Are you coming Suho is back and wants to talk to us.

Can Ann also come with?

Yes why not? I followed silently the two until we are facing a massive wooden door - Suho office. Chen knocked on the door and opened it. It was a large and bright office in the middle of a wooden table. It had been all assembled Chen and Lay placed them to the other. I hid behind Lay I did not want to be seen by Suho.

Since all are here, we can now begin our meeting. I tried not to fall asleep but it was really boring apparently the business was incorporation and Suho was CEO. Nothing illegal and I thought they had to do with the Mafia.

That's enough for now you can all go except Luhan and Ann. My body froze as I heard my name. I turned around and went the direction table and sat down to Luhan.

Luhan I want you to explain to me what's wrong with her.

So, according to Taos information I can diagnose a posttraumatic stress disorder. What the trigger for it is this is not clear to me. Ann you know it, perhaps?

I wanted to open my mouth and speak but I was too afraid of Suho so I said nothing.

I know what triggered this.

Suho are you sure?

Yes it was my fault. I have her.

He had to admit it. Luhan looked up at me, I lowered my gaze and tried not to cry and at least once to be strong. I wanted to be alone at that moment I did not wanted pitying glances and comforting words. For that, it was already too late. I stood up and ran.

-Away from my fear, my pain and my grief.-

A/N  Oh god this is so poorly written ... Sorry OTL