▲▲

For many reasons, my heart was beating faster that day. I was nervous until my bones because I was in front of approximately 500 students of the final year of high school, not including the teachers and parents. I could see my mom and dad sitting right at the back next to Yoona's parents. My classmates were in the front row and all of them were as nervous as me. The school's auditorium was pretty big, there were red soundproof walls and beige curtains on the stage where I was. Everything in that will make me miss this school. But the most important memory wasn't there, also, there was no sight of those 4 jerks. 

Of course they're not here. 

I lowered my head between sighs. This last year wasn't funny without them around. I felt kinda lonely because they weren't there. I missed them the most especially when I was having lunch and heading home. Of course, I had Yoona, but it wasn't the same thing. I missed Jimin and his chocolate-melting eyes, those kissable lips and that cute face of him. I missed his morning kiss that always made me blush and stutter. I missed those days that were cold and he gently gave me his coat or his gloves. I missed everything. It passed a year since he graduated along with Kookie, J-Hope and Taehyung sunbaes. I remember those lasts day so well.

▲ June of 2014, 6 days until Jimin's Graduation ▲

- Jimin, what are going to do when you graduate? - I asked him.

He slightly moved next to me, making our arms touch. That usual electricity ran all over my body, making me shiver a little. We were at the park since the weather was nice and we didn't have a date since his final exams. He had to study so we couldn't meet too long or have dates. Clearly, I had Yoona but she was feeling the same because Kookie was also studying.

- I don't know - he said - I'm still confused.

- About what?

- I have a problem Eunsoo - he looked to me - And I don't know what to do.

- Tell me, I'll help you. - I held his hand gently.

- The problem is that I don't wanna go to university. I wanna be a dancer like my dad. I always dreamed about being a dancer and I really love dancing.

- I know. So, if you don't want to go to university and become a dancer, what would be the problem?

- My mom. - he sighed - She want me to become a doctor or a lawyer.

- And isn't that every mom's desire? - I asked him - My mom want it too.

- Really?

- Yes. I still don't know what to do in future, I think that when I find the right thing for me, I'll follow it even if I have to disobey my  mom.

- So, are you telling me that I should follow my dream and not care about my mom?

- Not that way. I think you should talk with her first, have a calm and nice talk with her if you do that, I think she'll understand your feelings and accept. Your mom only wants you to have a nice life.

- I know but will it matters if I'm unhappy?

- That's what you have to say to your mom, she'll understand for sure.

- I hope so. - he lowered his head. I made him look at me, I could see that he was sad.

- It'll be fine so don't worry. You have all of my support.- And finished, this words, I kissed him gently without shame. It wasn't strong but passionate.

- Thanks. - he pressed his forehead on mine. 

Anything for you.

▲▲

Later that afternoon, Jimin walked me home and swore that he was going to talk with his mother at dinner. I gave him a kiss and went home. After a shower, I went downstairs to dinner. My mom and dad were working until nine p.m so I made ramyun and cut some vegetables for Zelo. In thirty minutes, I finished and washed the dishes, then I climbed the stairs to my room and my computer to watch some new music videos. Meanwhile, my phone rang. Jimin's derp face appeared on the screen.

- Jimin?

- Yeah, it's me. I have news.

- Tell me. How was your talk with your mom?

- I told her everything about dancing and my dream and she's letting me attend a dance school!

- That's wonderful Jimin! I knew you could do it.

- But she has one condition.

- What is it?

- She wants me to go to my father's school.

- I don't see the trouble in it. Your father will be there, right?

- Yes, but  his school is in Busan so I have to move.

I almost let the phone fell at the shock I had. Is Jimin going to leave? My heart seemed like it stopped for a second. 

- Eunsoo? - he asked - Are you there?

- Y-Yes. - I answered - I'm so happy for you! Tell me everything.

He told me the whole dialogue between him and his mom. He was going to stay there around three years and then he would return to Seul, where he would attend in another school and, who knows, become a famous dancer. I was happy for him, no doubt of that, after all, he would make his dream come true, but he had to move and that was making feel uneasy.

When we turned off, I stayed there looking to nothing, with my mind giving me thoughts that I hated. I visualized him in Busan for three years, away from his friends, away from me. I visualized him going out with other girls, without even care and ignoring my calls and messages. But the worst thought was living in a life without him. That made me feel a huge pain in my heart.

I cried before going to bed and cried once again when I woke up the next day. It was the last week that Jimin was going to stay in school, not only him but also the remaining boys. 

I'll miss them so much.

And sadly, I got up out from the bed and started getting ready for school with my heart breaking slowly.

 ☁4 days until Jimin's graduation☁

I didn't have the courage to see him in the next day, I couldn't. I had the feeling that I'd cry if I saw him, the pain of seeing him go was too strong. I thought I was a little bit stronger than before, that the shy girl was gone but I was wrong, my heart was still weak when the point is Jimin. I still had that fear which makes me sad and unable to act. He called me in the morning five times, and I ignored them all.

I walked to school twenty minutes after the first class started and I took another twenty to arrive at school because I walked slowly. The teacher was mad at me, but I didn't care about it. I even ignored Yoona when she asked me what happened. The teacher made me stay in class after the school bell rang. When all the students got out, he closed the door and sat on his desk.

- Eunsoo, what happened? - he asked me - You arrived forty minutes late and you were so quiet today, you even answered incorrectly to a simple question.

- I overslept Mr.Chan. I'm sorry - I bowed to him.

- Alright. I'll believe in you since it's the last week of classes. - he gave me a small pile of documents - There will be a meeting tomorrow and the class presidents have to go, no excuses.

- I understand.

- You can leave now.

I bowed to him once again and get out from the classroom. The hallway was empty because there were activities on the floor below, like music in the cafeteria and games all around the school campus, all prepared to give a good week of farewell to the third year students. I felt suddenly a tear running on my cheek and went to the bathroom to wash my face. I couldn't be like that at school, I had to wait until I went home to cry. I mentally supported myself to keep strong a few hours more. When I was sure that I wouldn't cry, I went out and walked to the library, without students, and stayed in a corner while listening to piano solos the whole break.

When I went to my classroom, I didn't see nobody, just the teachers going to their respective classes. Then, I found Mr. Chan and went in the classroom with him.

- Weren't you downstairs with the others? - he asked.

- My head hurts a little so I didn't go there. There was too much noise.

- I see. By the way, the principal told me to give you this. - he gave me a cardboard box full of dark-blue uniforms.

- He wants you to give them to 3-C students. The list of the names is on the top of it.

My eyes opened wide, 3-C was Jimin's class. My heart almost stopped and my hands started trembling.

- Are you okay? - Mr. Chan asked - You're trembling.

- I-I'm fine. My head just hurts a little.

- You can go to the infirmary after giving those. Rest a bit but come back before the class ends.

- Okay, thank you Mr.Chan.

When I turned around, all my classmates were sitting in their seats. I didn't notice them entering, not even Yoona, who was looking at me intently, trying to, somehow, figure out what I was thinking. I smiled forcefully at her and silently told her I was fine. Then, I went out from the classroom and walked slowly to 3-C class with my heart beating fast. All the way, I prepared my heart and told myself not to look at him or the boys. I would just say what I was doing there and give the uniforms. 

You can do it. Don't look at them.

I knocked three times and a male voice told me to come in. As I opened the door, all the heads turned to me. I automatically saw Hoseok and Taehyung in the penultimate table next to the window and Taehyung turned his head back and said something to his classmates. One of them lifted his head and I almost let fall the cardboard box. Jimin was looking at me his those chocolate-melting eyes, at that moment with a worried expression. I supposed that the guy next to him was Kookie sunbae. I looked to the teacher, ignoring his gaze on me. The teacher gestured with his hand for me to walk up and put me in front of the students. I put the cardboard on the floor and bowed to the students. 

- I'm 2-A's class president, Lee Eunsoo. The principal gave me orders to give these uniforms to some of you. I have the list here so I'll call one by one.

- Go ahead. - said the teacher - You guys be attentive to your name.

I grabbed the paper and started to call the students one by one. Every student I called had his or her respective uniform so it took much time than I thought. I felt Jimin's eyes on me all the time and because of it, I almost cried. I haven't looked at him even once and tried not to look at the boys but when I saw Hoseok's name on the list I couldn't pretend that they weren't there. I took a deep breath before lifting my eyes from the list.

- The last student is Jeong Hoseok.

He stood up and walked towards me and, not to delay any longer, I took his uniform from the cardboard box and gave it to him as soon as he came near me and returned my gaze to the list to confirm that all the students had received their uniforms. He was still there looking at me and when he realized that I wasn't going to look at him, he went back to his place. I was sure I hurt him but if I looked at him, he would probably see my sadness and I didn't want that to happen.

- Thanks for the uniforms - said the teacher.

- It was nothing - I smiled to the teacher - Sorry for any trouble.

I bowed to him and left without looking at them. As I closed the door, a tear fell from my eye. Thank god it wasn't nobody there. I went to the bathroom and washed my face for the second time that morning. Mr. Chan told me that I could go to the infirmary after giving the uniforms, I had no headaches, but I took advantage of his generosity and walked over there. I had to bring a paper from the nurse to prove that I was there. I needed to be alone to think about what I would do, I couldn't avoid him until he went away, but I didn't want him to see me like this. It was a shock to me. 

I arrived at the infirmary and told the nurse that I wasn't feeling well and my head hurt. She gave me a painkiller and let me rest there, she needed to do something so she excused herself and left, leaving me alone. I closed my eyes for a moment and many memories ran in my mind. I remembered that dream when I was bullied and he carried me to the infirmary and treated my wounds. It was a dream, however, I could feel the same sensation every time we stayed together. A tear after another fell and flowed down to my face, followed by small sobs. That wave of sadness ran through my body, making me wince briefly. I buried my head between my knees and hugged my legs, I didn't want him to go away because a part of me would die without him. I'd feel empty inside, I wouldn't be the same.

Please don't leave me.

☁

I told the nurse that I wasn't feeling better and the nurse, seeing how pale I was, she thought that it would be better if I went home for the rest of the day. I was grateful to my parents for made me that way because whenever I cried, my face turned pale and my lips dried. She gave me the permission document to go home and told me to pick up my belongings. I felt guilty, but I couldn't stay in school. She followed me to the classroom and knocked the door. Mr.Chan told her to come in, all the students were looking at us, especially Yoona.

- I'm sorry, Mr.Chan - said the nurse - But Miss Eunnoo isn't feeling well and she's going home.

- Of course. She was like that this morning too. 

I packed my stuff and I could feel  Yoona's gaze on me.

- Why didn't you tell me? - she asked me - I would have stayed with you and told the boys. Jimin was very worried about you because you didn't answer his calls.

- I'm sorry, I overslept. 

- Rest okay, I'll call you later.

- Okay, I'm going. - I smiled weakly at her.

I went out from the classroom with the nurse and went to the school's gate, where a taxi was waiting for me. The nurse left after I entered in the taxi. I gave my address to the driver and we arrived at home seven minutes after. As I locked the front door, I ran to my room and slammed the door behind me, sitting against it. I thought I cried rivers and oceans and I seriously didn't have reasons to do it. Jimin was leaving, so what? I was doing a huge drama, it wasn't because of eight months that my life would be different...right?

I laughed to myself. Who do I want to cheat? I didn't know how to live without him. He was a part of me already. Those eight months were the most amazing ones in my whole life. I never been that happy and it's all thanks to him.

You are a part of me and I don't know how to let you go.

▲3 days until Jimin's Graduation▲

I slept the whole day and only woke up in the next morning, I was needing that extra hours of sleep. I my phone because I turned it off yesterday when I arrived home. There were six missed calls and four messages. I felt guilty for having worried them, but I had no choice. Two calls were made by Yoona and the other four by Jimin. I didn't have the guts to call them at that moment so I went straight to the