Dear Myungsoo,

It’s so cold now, I wish I had saved some sunlight from summer.

Like how I used to cup my hands, and you’d blow your warm breath into it. Then I would save it in a bottle and it would last through the winter. Remember how we sat sipping tangy lemonade in the lawn? I reveled in whatever stingy breeze the nature allowed while you gazed into the salty blue sky, intertwining our fingers. I would see the same look in your eyes when you’d woo me at night and make me believe it was mid-July and Christmas at the same time.

Too bad the memories are not enough for me to feel autumn through the cold glares of winter. It isn’t like the winter doesn’t have its share of memories, it does.

I mean we met in winter, didn’t we?

I was just starting out at Seoul Private Hospital, and you had brought your aunt, Mrs. Nam, for a check-up. I still remember how you weren’t one bit annoyed even though you were filling in for Woohyun hyung, even though you had cancelled important meetings to bring her to the hospital. Mrs. Nam praised you so much when I was talking to her. I admired you for that, and that was why I held your gaze for a full minute when I found out that you were stealing glances at me while I worked by Prof. Kang’s side.

It was winter then, when you started frequenting the hospital even though you weren’t sick. The lame excuses you used to come up with made me laugh. Even though I knew it was me you had come to see, I pretended not to just to see you squirm. And then one day, you blurted out your feelings for me.

It was winter then, and it’s winter now. And here we are…

PS: Do you still like to drink iced lemonade on snowy nights?

 With love,

Sungjong