I am so sorry for not updating for so long… well at least I updated some dooseob haha (it is under one-shot)! Anyways the series is going to be over soon. A few more chapters I think. The reference is already at episode 19 in the iris drama and the drama ends at episode 20. So a little bit more and we are done. I am so happy!! I hope you guys enjoy reading :)

I love you

Don’t leave me

I love you so much

Ahjussi

Please you have to hear me

I love you

Blur.

White and blurry.        

Hyunwoo opened his eyes and saw blurs of white. His eyes were glued together, lids extremely heavy. He felt like he was hit by a truck – he was somewhat involved in a truck accident and all – his body lethargic, every joint and muscle screamed in protest when he moved his body to sit up.

“Are you awake now?” Sooyeon asked, trying to stop Hyunwoo to sit up. “Don’t move, take care of yourself first.”

“How about Shih Hyuk?” Hyunwoo ignored Sooyeon as he sat up on the makeshift infirmary bed.

“Not yet.”

Hyunwoo nodded at the answer. He took out the needle on his arm that was connected to the IV drops and stepped down to wear his shoes. He was going to hunt Shih Hyuk down before the guy did more damage.

“Take care of yourself first. That is an order from your Team Leader.” Sooyeon said harshly.

Hyunwoo could not take any of this anymore. He needed to find Shih Hyuk and he must make other people see the emergency on this matter. “We must find him. He killed his partner and even the operation agents. He even shot me, we don’t know what he will do next.”

“The whole team is looking for him,” Sooyeon supplied, “Since he was shot twice by you, even if he’s alive, he must not be able to move easily.” She sighed, “You are confined to this room and not allowed to step out. There are two agents in front of this room. I will let you know if we have a lead.”

Hyunwoo frowned because this was unfair. “Ji Sooyeon, you cannot do this. This is – “

Sooyeon walked to the door, but before she walked out completely, she turned and told Hyunwoo, “Someone is here for you. I will let your visitor in.”

Visitor? No one had visitor here, this was a ing Headquarters not a –

“OH MY GOD! AHJUSSI YOU ARE AWAKE!”

Yoseob ran into Hyunwoo the second he stepped into the room. He wrapped his arms around Hyunwoo, mindful of the wound, and buried his face onto Hyunwoo’s chest, wet warmth immediately seeping into the soft cotton. Gentle sobs echoed loudly in the silent room.

“Yoseob?” Hyunwoo croaked out in confusion, his throat was too dry and his voice too rough. He was groggy as because the last thing he remembered was flashes of Yoseob before everything went black and empty and this felt unreal.

Yoseob was crying.

“Shhh… Don’t cry…” Hyunwoo wrapped his arms around the smaller man, still feeling unreal. He hated it when Yoseob cried. “I’m sorry…”

Yoseob shook his head vehemently, “I love you… I love you… I’m just so happy…”

“Why… why are you here? How did you get here?”

Yoseob pushed back a little as he looked up to Hyunwoo, eyes moist and slightly red, and Hyunwoo wanted to kick himself. “I know who you are and what you do, Sooyeon Noona told me, but please don’t be angry at her. Promise me not to be angry at her.” Hyunwoo forced a nod and Yoseob continued, “It’s okay that you lied to me, I’m sure you are doing this because NSS is supposed to be a national secret or something. It is alright, it’s good that everything is out in the open.”

Hyunwoo frowned because this was just so out of character for a Yang Yoseob, the idol of his generation. “No you are not okay. You can scream at me and hit me and kick me or elbow me or whatever if you feel like it. Have a go at me.”

Yoseob shook his head weakly, “I am okay now.” He smiled and Hyunwoo felt a stab at his heart. “At first I felt betrayed because I told you everything. Every single thing about me and my life, my past, my family, my broken heart. But you never returned the favor to me, you held things back. You have so many things that you keep to yourself. I knew you were lying all along, there were little things that indicated you were more than what you said you were. But I did not say anything to you, because I learn to be content with what I have, because I rather have a little of you than not having anything at all, because I am sure one day you will open up to me. A day which I don’t know when.”

Hyunwoo buried his face into the softness of Yoseob’s hair, words of apology not enough for him. “I’m sorry. I’m sorry… we had a lot of fights because of this.” Hyunwoo whispered, soft and broken.

Yoseob sobbed, hands on Hyunwoo’s shirt. “I know you are devoted to your work, devoted to Sooyeon Noona. Sometimes I wonder if you are ever devoted to me or if you are with me because I am clingy and such a bother to get rid of – the ‘if you can’t beat them, join them’ principle– instead of really loving me deep down. I’m not blaming anyone on this because I can only blame my stupid self for being insecure. But I love you so much I cannot breathe without you.”

Hyunwoo’s jaw tightened, he was angry with himself for making Yoseob feel miserable and insecure. He hugged a sobbing Yoseob as closely as his wound let him to and placed a kiss on Yoseob’s hair, “I love you. I have never loved anyone as much as I love you. Sometimes I feel like I don’t deserve you. You are the sun in the sky, while I am just a rock at the bottom of a murky water river, you have so many people who love you, who adore you, who treat you better, who deserve you. You deserve better than just settling with me.”

Yoseob snuggled closer and kissed the exposed skin on Hyunwoo’s collarbone, “I think you do. You deserve me and so much more.”

A choked breath came out of Hyunwoo, “I’m so sorry for making you doubt yourself, I’m sorry for making you sad and insecure, I’m sorry for lying to you. I am so sorry for not prioritizing you in my life, you are my one and only and that’s how you will be forever. There is nothing between me and Sooyeon, there is only you and me, Yoseobah. You and me.”

They looked at each other and Yoseob raised himself up on his tippy toes while Hyunwoo slowly lowered his head. Their lips met in the middle as they kissed slowly, a chaste meeting of dry lips and wet lips.

“I love you,” Hyunwoo said, affectionate and determined. “I love you so much that I will never want to lose you or put you in danger. Listen to me carefully and stay here for a few days. Shih Hyuk is still on the loose, he is the mole in the organization. No one knows what he will do next and I have a feeling he will get me back for shooting him. I need to have you safe. Please help me to get you safe.”

Yoseob grabbed Hyunwoo’s arms tightly. He was suddenly scared, “Are you going to be alright?”

Hyunwoo rested his forehead against Yoseob’s and whispered softly, “I need you to be safe. I’m going to be okay, we are going to be okay, I promise. Everything is going to end soon and we will go home. But for now, at least for a few nights, please stay here in the Headquarters. There are a few spare rooms, I can arrange for your things to be sent here immediately. I will talk to Jintaek about your schedule, I am very sorry for involving you in this.”

“I will talk to Jintaek. It’s going to be fine. I love you always.” Yoseob kissed Hyunwoo again.

Hyunwoo returned the favour and pressed deeper into the soft lips, “I love you more.”

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Hyunwoo silently slid into the seat across Sooyeon in Paris Baguette. Sooyeon came to his confined room after Yoseob had already settled in one of the spare rooms in the NSS Headquarters – with his things and all already arranged. She did not explicitly confirm that Hyunwoo was freed, instead she took him out to Yoogun’s and her favourite restaurant – Hyunwoo knew this fact – Paris Baguette.

Still feeling betrayed at everything Sooyeon did on him, especially involving Yoseob into this mess, Hyunwoo stayed quiet, his eyes hard and accusing. Sooyeon charmingly ordered two sets of warm mushroom soup and a cup of coffee for both of them.

Hyunwoo stared at the bowl of warm mushroom soup in front of him, he did not even want to look at Sooyeon anymore.

Sooyeon sighed, “If you eat that, you will be freed.”

Hyunwoo hardened his jaws, took the spoon and scooped a spoonful into his mouth. He just wanted all of this bull to be done.

Sooyeon started, “I know you are disappointed in me. You know, in this field, we often have to do things we don’t want to.” Hyunwoo swallowed a lump in his throat and Sooyeon continued, “I’m not going to say sorry. I want you to… just trust me. That I’m trusting you as a colleague, that I’ll be there for you when you are going through tough times.”

Sooyeon was quiet for a bit before she continued, sincere and heartfelt. “Please just trust me. Just as you’ve done so far. Okay?”

Hyunwoo nodded as a very tiny smile flitted across his face. Having talk about it was always much better, and although Hyunwoo was still angry at her decisions and what she had done, he could not hold anymore grudge on her. Enough is enough, now they had to work together because there were bigger issues than just personal grudges.

“How was Yoseob-sshi?” Sooyeon asked as she chewed on the bread.

Hyunwoo’s face lit up a little at the mention of his lover’s name. “He’s settled in one of the spare rooms in the Headquarters. I told him to spend a few nights there because Shih Hyuk is still on the loose. Honestly, I am still furious that you involved him in this. What is he doing in the Headquarters? I didn’t ask him this because I know he won’t tell me the truth.”

Sooyeon subconsciously blushed at the memories and bit harder on her bread, “He was there to provide some information and act as a witness to your alibi. No… further information on the interrogation is not available for you so there isn’t anything you can do to coerce it out of me. Although, it was a miscalculation from my part because I did not think you will be moved so quickly.”

“I just hope he isn’t involved in some danger.” Hyunwoo took another spoonful of soup.

Sooyeon smiled, “He loves you so much, there isn’t anything he won’t do for you. I have told him I was taking you out for dinner, so don’t worry on that.” Hyunwoo tried not to beam, but failed so miserably. He kept quiet and hid his smile behind his cup of coffee.

It had been a while since they caught up with one another, each facing their own problems and issues. The dinner was nice, and Hyunwoo thought of bringing something back for Yoseob. When he was waiting for his take-away to be ready, his phone started vibrating. He assumed Yoseob was calling him but to his dismay, ‘Yoon Shih Hyuk’ lit up the caller screen. Hyunwoo immediately swiped to answer and stiffened when he heard Shih Hyuk’s voice.

“Hello.”

“Yoon Shih Hyuk, where are you now?” Hyunwoo motioned Sooyeon for a note he could write on. Sooyeon opened up the note on her phone and Hyunwoo wrote an instruction for Sooyeon to track his call because Shih Hyuk was on the line.

Shih Hyuk replied lazily, “Well, I wonder where… Hyunwoo-yah because of the bullets I got from you, my is still hurting. You know that?”

Sooyeon was already on her phone, instructing her team at the Headquarters to trace the location of the call Hyunwoo just received on his phone.

Hyunwoo was up on his feet, anxious and furious, “Where are you?”

“I always return what I get from others,” Shih Hyuk drawled, “I’ll return your bullets three times over. Look forward to it.”

“Where are you now –“ Shih Hyuk hung up before Hyunwoo finished his sentence.

Sooyeon received a location on her phone and she stared in horror at Hyunwoo.

“Where is it?” Hyunwoo pressed.

“It’s your place.”

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Hyunwoo was not grateful often in his 32 years of his life. He lived his life not thinking about such things because who should he be grateful to? If his days were good, it was because he made some good decisions, and when it was bad, it was because he made some terrible decisions and what he could do was some damage control to fix them.

Hyunwoo was not grateful often, but now he was grateful out of his wits. To whom? To the higher beings above? To himself for making great decisions? He did not care, he was just so grateful that Yoseob was not there in his – their – apartment. He would definitely lose his mind if Yoseob was sleeping in his house when Shih Hyuk infiltrated his place.

With their guns poised, Hyunwoo and Sooyeon checked every corner of the apartment. Hyunwoo saw Yoseob’s stuff all around the apartment – his shoes, his clothes – and the older man’s stomach sunk. He could not imagine what would happen if Yoseob was here instead of being in the NSS Headquarters. There was no one at the apartment, but it was obvious someone went through it.

“He was here not too long ago.” Sooyeon said, “What is he trying to do?”

“He’s trying to get back at me.” Hyunwoo deadpanned.

Sooyeon looked at Hyunwoo who was staring at a spot on the TV cabinet. It was a framed picture of Yoseob hugging Hyunwoo from behind during one of their futsal practices, which Jinwoon had taken secretly and given them a copy of it (another copy was tacked on the announcement board for everyone else to see). Yoseob had been very happy to receive it and immediately framed it.

Hyunwoo could not shift his eyes away.

The glass was cracked as if someone stepped on it. And Hyunwoo knew very well who did it.

Shih Hyuk was not here to find something.

Shih Hyuk was here to find someone.