So this is up again!! i know all of you wanted another chapter update and here it is! TA DAAAHHH (esp @yoonleaderp and @_tetaaa lols! follow them people they are hilarious!) i am so sorry i could not reply to all of your comments but again i read aaaaaaallllll of them and love all of you *smoochessss* please subscribe and give me the (what do you call that) upvote or something? anyways, i have a little bit of time this week (next week is gonna be busy again...busy busy busy...)so i'm trying to squeeze in as many update as i can manage to churn out. okaes then happy readingg!! :) mistakes are all mine and i'm sorry if it disturbs your reading in one way or another OTL

Hyunwoo raised his eyebrows when he saw Yoseob came in through the sliding door at Coffee Cojjee in his usual get up that he knew very well by now. Black sleeveless top, cropped khaki pants, black and orange running shoes, black cap over his head and a mask over his mouth, hiding half of his face. Hyunwoo glanced at his forever-accurate watch and was slightly surprised that Yoseob was five minutes early than their agreed meeting time – Hyunwoo was always, always, at least fifteen minutes early to every scheduled meeting – unlike all the other hangout sessions they had where Yoseob was always, always, late.

Upon entering, Yoseob quickly scanned the cozy café and spotted Hyunwoo’s hand in the air, a quiet signal to where he was seated (he occupied the same seat as their previous visit, not that Yoseob remembered all the details). The idol removed his mask and moved towards the table with a slight smile, on his way greeting some fellow entertainers who had just had their hair and make-up done or about to have their hair and make-up done at the salon next to the café (Yoseob was going to the salon as well after this because he needed to get ready for a music program later on, so this meeting location was quite convenient).

When Yoseob reached the table, he saw a tall glass of fresh iced chocolate, a plate of chocolate cake, and another plate of cheesecake sitting pretty on his side of the table, while a half-full iced Americano sat in front of Hyunwoo. Yoseob sighed silently, he was too tired for any of this caring anymore.

“Wow,” Yoseob said brightly in his usual bright voice, “you ordered for me!” He took a seat across Hyunwoo and smiled brightly at the older man. Hyunwoo frowned a little because Yoseob’s bright smile did not reach his eyes.

Hyunwoo was worried about Yoseob. They still texted, of course, but Yoseob’s texts were short and curt and cold, and the younger man had completely stopped pestering him. This was absolutely good news for Hyunwoo – well, it was supposed to be – but there was something nagging at the back of Hyunwoo’s mind, a gut feeling that told him something was definitely wrong, that something was not sitting right with Yoseob.

And he kind of missed hanging out with Yoseob and his absolutely strange and irritating behaviors that annoyed the out of Hyunwoo but endeared him at the same time, the affection he had for the young idol went beyond that of a protective friend or an older brother. It ran deeper than anything he had ever felt before. Hyunwoo sighed, it was complicated.

He had finally (sort of) confessed his feelings to Sooyeon a week ago, and he recognized rejection when he received one. It was gentle though because she laid him off as kindly as possible, without hurting his feelings, and they immediately went back to their friendly teasing ways with jokes and easy banters.

Anyways, he needed closure to start a new relationship with a new someone.

 “Thanks for coming,” Hyunwoo started with a tight-lipped smile because he was suddenly nervous because it was suddenly awkward, “I thought you wouldn’t come considering your busy schedules and all…”

Yoseob shook his head, “Of course I would have come. You asked me out for breakfast, this is new; you never asked me out before.” The idol chuckled before on his iced chocolate, grateful for something to do instead of staring at Hyunwoo.

Hyunwoo laughed as he took the silver fork on top of the brown tissue paper and placed it on the chocolate cake plate. “You are early for a change.”

Yoseob grinned, “Yeah, I’m changing for the better, not gonna get stuck in the past.” He said it so charmingly with that bright grin on his face, but Hyunwoo could catch a deep bitterness behind the voice and he wondered why because the younger man was always so straightforward about his feelings.  Yoseob sounded a little distant but that might be because he was tired.

“Are you okay?”

Yoseob looked up to see Hyunwoo staring at him with so much affection and worry that his heart could not take anything anymore and he would burst into tears any second now because there were too many feelings, too many pain, and he could not do this anymore because God forbid –

“I’m great. How are you?” Yoseob nodded and smiled sweetly at Hyunwoo.

Again Hyunwoo frowned, because the smile did not reach Yoseob’s eyes. “Are you falling sick?”

Yoseob swore he could not do this anymore, he just wanted to throw profanities after profanities at the older man and pounced him onto the floor and hit him so hard repeatedly and leave and never –

“Nope. I’m great.” The smile got even brighter.

“But you look a little pale and your eyes are a little red and swollen.” Hyunwoo reached across the table to rub below Yoseob’s eyes.

Yoseob jerked back instantly, leaning out of Hyunwoo’s reach and rubbed his eyes quickly. He had tried so hard not to cry too much yesterday because he knew he was meeting Hyunwoo, but because he knew he was meeting Hyunwoo he could not stop crying, it was like this evil cycle that kept on going and Yoseob could not stop crying and his heart could not stop hurting and –

“I’m just tired. I need more sleeping hours, I’ve been busier these past few days.” He pulled his cap lower onto his head, throwing all of his ugly emotions into a beautiful huge box with a pretty ribbon on top and keeping it far within the remnants of his heart.

Hyunwoo narrowed his eyes when Yoseob jerked back, it was strange at how the younger man was avoiding an innocent touch when Yoseob was usually clinging to him and very much open to touching. He rested both of his hands on the table and stared warmly at Yoseob, “You can talk to me, Yoseobah. Is there anything you would like to share with me?”

Yoseob shook his head innocently, drinking his iced chocolate.

The atmosphere was awkward as they both stared at each other in silence. Hyunwoo knew Yoseob was lying, but did not press on it. “We are worried about you. I am worried about you. You didn’t show up for the usual soccer practice and you didn’t come to the gym for boxing. Everyone was asking me about you.”

“I was busy. I texted you.” Yoseob whined cutely, hoping that his signature cute acts would cover him up.

“You didn’t reply my texts and only started replying a few days ago. It’s been a week, and we are all worried about you. Sooyeon is worried sick about you.”

Yoseob jolted slightly at hearing Sooyeon’s name as intense pain traveled up his spine. He did not want to hear her name, he did not want to hear anything about her, he did not want to remember she existed, he did not want –

“How is Sooyeon Noona? Is she okay?” Yoseob asked calmly, grinning happily at Hyunwoo. Chocolate cake and cheesecake left untouched on the table. Iced chocolate was drunk out of courtesy.

“She’s good. But that is beside the point I am making, everyone was – “

“How’s Team Leader Jung? Is he still suspended? I haven’t seen him for a while. I miss him.” Yoseob said absentmindedly, ignoring Hyunwoo’s speech about Yoseob’s short and sudden disappearance.

Hyunwoo frowned, extremely uncomfortable with the whole Yoogun topic, “He isn’t around so much. Anyways back to my point, you did not even take my calls, you should not – “

Yoseob tilted his head to the side a little, eyes widening adorably as if he finally understood, “Team Leader Jung is not around so much anymore… huh… so that is why.” Yoseob nodded to himself because he was grasping the whole situation now. He did not want to know what happened to Yoogun because that was another issue, but he knew that because Yoogun was not around so much anymore that was how Hyunwoo could get a chance with Sooyeon. So now he knew.

It was good that he knew, because now he could stop being stupid.

“What are you talking about?” Hyunwoo was frustrated by Yoseob’s odd responses. He sighed because he should be in the office in fifteen minutes and it was a forty five minutes’ drive from Coffee Cojjee to his office.  “Listen, you don’t know how worried I was. I called Dongwoon and all I got from him was ‘huh’ and ‘I don’t know’, and you can’t leave me with that…”

Yoseob tuned out from whatever Hyunwoo was telling him about. He stared at Hyunwoo’s lips moving but he did not hear a sound, he saw Hyunwoo’s frustrated gestures but he did not get anything at all. Suddenly Hyunwoo’s phone rang and he cursed because it was from the office and something important was definitely going on.

“Yoseobah.”

Yoseob jerked back into reality, “Huh?” He asked forlornly.

“I need to get back to the office, so I talk to you later. Eat your cakes and drink your iced chocolate.” Hyunwoo stood up and shrugged into his black suit professionally.

Yoseob nodded.

He then crouched next to Yoseob’s chair and stared at the younger man intently, “I’ll talk to you later so pick up your phone when I call, okay.”

Yoseob nodded again, now with a wide grin on his face.

Hyunwoo stood up and patted Yoseob on the head, “Bye, Kid. Remember, pick up your phone.”

Yoseob watched as Hyunwoo left the café in a hurry. His grin vanished as his face fell.

Yoseob whispered sadly, “Goodbye, Ahjussi.”

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“Hello, Yang Yoseob.”

Yoseob turned around quickly from his seat to realize that his worst nightmare had come true. Yong Junhyung was standing near the door inside his waiting room of a music program. The younger man frowned and cocked his head to the side, looking for Dongwoon and Kikwang.

“Dongwoon and Kikwang are not here.”

Yoseob glared at Junhyung because even when they hated each other, he could still easily read Yoseob’s mind. “What do you want?” He asked rudely.

Junhyung stood still on his spot and shoved his hands into his pockets, “I just want to talk.”

“Talk about what?”

“About us. About this…” Junhyung opened his arms and made a big gesture with his hands, “Us. All three of us. You, me, and Hayoon.”

 “What is there to talk about?” Yoseob said defensively as he crossed his hands over his chest.

Junhyung sighed, “But first and foremost, I should apologize. I’m sorry for everything that went on between the three of us. I’m sorry for letting it last this long. I’m sorry for not coming up to you and tell you I’m sorry. I’m sorry.”

Yoseob frowned, but he immediately softened at Junhyung’s words. The words of apology he had longed to hear for so long had finally been said, but against everything he had believed, the apologies did not make him deliriously happy, the apologies did not satisfy his ego, the apologies did not make him want to gloat and jump around; instead the apologies made him sad.

The apologies made him realize how he had missed Junhyung and Hayoon Noona.

He uncrossed his hands and let down his defensive posture, “Do you want to sit down on the sofa?” Yoseob asked Junhyung as he motioned towards a few sofas in his huge waiting room. The dancers, the Coordi Noonas, even Dongwoon and Kikwang all went to buy some food when there were tons of food given by Yoseob’s fans which were more than enough for everybody in the studio. So he was all alone.

Junhyung went to the sofa and sat down, “Do you want to sit next to me?” He grinned at Yoseob, just like old times. Yoseob smiled too, and proceeded to sit next to Junhyung on the big and comfortable sofa.

Yoseob knew Junhyung was nervous as he twisted his fingers together, an old habit Junhyung had developed since he was a child, an old habit Yoseob knew too well, “Why are so nervous?” Yoseob a little and Junhyung chuckled as he stopped twisting his fingers together.

“How are you?” Junhyung asked.

Yoseob chuckled, “Everyone keeps asking me that question today. ‘How are you’, ‘Are you okay’, do I look like I’m not okay?”

Junhyung shook his head, “Not really, but you did look a bit down this past week. But of course I’m not gonna probe or anything. It’s not like you can just confide in me like before.” Yooseob did not miss the sad smile fleeting over Junhyung’s face.

Yoseob thought it would be awkward, he thought there would be this grand and epic battle before they would even speak to each other again. He never thought that talking to Junhyung after a long feud would be this comforting; he never thought that he would be able to laugh this genuinely with Junhyung.

All of the love they had for each other during their long friendship surged forward and Yoseob missed Junhyung so ing much right now, he missed Hayoon Noona too. He wanted for him, Junhyung, Hayoon Noona, Kikwang, and Dongwoon to be together again, just like they always had before his selfishness took over his reasonable mind and sacrificed everyone else around him. 

“How are you? How are you and Noona?” Yoseob asked sincerely without a trace of hatred or vengeance. He really did want to know how they were doing. He missed them both terribly.

Junhyung smiled shyly, “We are okay. She is worried about you just like how she used to. Are you eating right, are you sleeping well, are you having nightmares, are you too busy… stuff like that.” The young producer shrugged sheepishly.

Yoseob laughed, happy that his two oldest friends were doing so well. He sighed, “Truthfully, I am happy for both of you.” He stared at Junhyung seriously, “It’s just that all this anger keeps building up because you stole her away from me and I can’t see that you both are practically made for each other. You see, all of these selfishness and rage keep eating me away, forcing me to hate both of you because I always thought that Noona was made for me and no one could take her away from me and you were my best friend from all of my best friends and yet you betrayed me and I was just having all of this fury inside of me. I’m sorry.” Yoseob blabbered out his innermost feelings and disappointment that he had buried for so long.

“I’m sorry.” Junhyung placed a hand on Yoseob’s back, it up and down just like how he used to do it for Yoseob when the younger man was agitated, “I’m sorry for everything and I’m sorry for telling you this. It’s just that…” Junhyung inhaled a deep breath before continuing, “It’s just that… you didn’t love Hayoon that way, Yoseobah. You loved her because you were used to her being there. You were used to her being by your side; you loved her out of habit. But I… I love her – “

Junhyung felt warm and strong hands around his body and he was surprised when he realized Yoseob was hugging him tight, “I know… I know and it’s okay. I understand and having both of you back in my life is more important than anything right now.”

Yoseob let Junhyung go and smiled, “Thank you.”

Junhyung laughed, bright and happy “Thank goodness we did not cry!”

Yoseob grinned at Junhyung, his eyes sincere, “There was nothing to cry about.”

“Okay guys, you can come in now.” Junhyung said loudly all of a sudden and the door burst open, revealing three figures running inside the room with joyful sounds. Kikwang, Dongwoon, and Hayoon all but ran to where Junhyung and Yoseob were sitting at. Wide smiles plastered all over their faces, while Yoseob noticed a few tear lines on Hayoon’s pretty face.

Yoseob was laughing like a mad person when all the other four were chattering excitedly, he could not even decipher who was saying what because they all talked at the same time and laughing hysterically at God-knows-what. He was busy being hugged by Hayoon who was more than squeezing the life out of him, he was busy scolding Kikwang and Dongwoon because they lied about the food, he was busy clapping his hands when Junhyung started doing some aegyo battle with Dongwoon.

But he was glad. He was absolutely glad that his small family was here again, and he could stop hating Junhyung and Hayoon Noona because hating them was terrifyingly difficult for Yoseob just because he loved both of them so much and wanted all the best for them.

Yoseob could not stop laughing, and then he was crying. He was crying with tears running down his face, but because he was laughing too much.

Yoseob was crying out of happiness.

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 It was an absolutely long and tiring day for Hyunwoo as he threw his tie and suit on the bed. There had been some rumors about some rat inside the agency, coupled with an increasing activity from IRIS, and Yoogun disappearance.

But most of all, it was Yoseob that bugged his mind. The bright smiles, the sweet words, the easy teasing, it all looked normal to him, but then something was definitely off. Hyunwoo knew something was wrong. He sat on his King-sized bed and flicked the television on absentmindedly. He was fumbling to find his phone and call Yoseob when he heard it.

It was some weekly entertainment news they always had on the channel, and Hyunwoo had never watched it before. He the television out of habit more than anything, so that the apartment was less quiet and less lonely.

On the program were a sheep-costumed person and an interviewer in a very familiar amusement park. Hyunwoo had never seen this program before and all he knew was that the sheep-costumed person he met at the amusement park was there on his television.

“Yang Yoseob, the cute and adorable, Noona killer, super idol of our generation is here with us today in his sheep costume. Yang Yoseob in a Yang (sheep) costume! How cute is that, haha! Hello, how are you doing Yoseob-sshi… An idol doing social service is not unheard of, but for you to do social service repeatedly in a year is astounding! Coupled with your busy schedules and…”

Hyunwoo’s ears were ringing loudly and he could not hear anything anymore of the interview playing on his television. He watched as Yoseob bowed politely to the much older interviewer and smiled brighter than the sun on that sunny day a week ago. He watched as Yoseob strutted around clumsily with his sheep-costume. He watched as Yoseob smiled sheepishly when a fan asked for a picture. He watched as the program filmed Yoseob on his duty, acting cutely to the visitor who might or might not know that Yang Yoseob was inside the sheep costume.

He watched the sheep costume talk, laugh, and chat on his television but he could not hear a thing because his brain was working so hard he could almost hear it turning in his head.

“Aw, is he shy? Hyunwoo-yah, come and take selca with him.”

The sheep costume that he and Sooyeon took picture with side by side… Yoseob knew they went to the amusement park.

“Oh, I did not find it, Sir. Someone in a sheep costume asked me to give this back to you.”

The sheep costume that found Hyunwoo’s key… he was sure Yoseob had heard everything he said to Sooyeon.

Hyunwoo felt his knees weakened as he dropped down on his bed, holding his head in his hands. It did not take a rocket scientist to know what was wrong with Yoseob now, it was him.

, what had he done… what had he done…

He watched as Yoseob delivered a closing line to the audience of the program and waved animatedly with a sincere smile that reached his eyes.