Poetry should... should strike the reader as a wording of his own highest thoughts, and appear almost a remembrance.
John Keats

After helping Dae, Seungri and TOP and with the rat pimping out my services, I have steadily helped guys in school pair up with the girl of their dreams.

I should feel flattered with guys approaching me but it wasn’t my love they were after anyway, they just need my help. I don’t mind, I still think mine is out there.

And it’s not as if I’m betraying the girls in my school. I’m also helping them to end up with a decent guy.

But it does get lonely sometimes seeing people pair up while I have no one. Maybe one day he’ll pop up and surprise me.

It’s sad that I couldn’t write a love note for myself to save me.

It was the start of a new school year. The pairs I have helped remained strong and I am still helping poor love-sick guys occasionally.

However,I am surprised one day when I was graced by his presence.

He used to study here but he transferred when we were 10 because his father got a promotion at work but now he’s back. When he returned this year, he seemed to have changed a lot. Gone was the skinny and nerdy boy. He looked good and fit yet still lean and has gotten around to wearing contacts and fashionable clothes. In fact, many of the girls in our school have crushes on him. Even I am not blind to his looks.

So I was surprised why I found him one day after classes, lurking near my locker appearing anxious and fidgety. His actions sparked my curiosity. I purposely slowed down emptying my bag and fixing the books in my locker. He must really want to say something if he was holding off until everyone has left.

As I was shutting my locker, he approached me.

“Hey, can we talk?” he asked.

“Sure. We’re already talking.” I said.

“I mean privately.” He said, seemingly embarrassed.

“You need something?” I asked, knowing what he needed. I feel awkward talking to him. Our little scenario reminds me of the way illegal transactions happen in the movies.

“Yes.” He replied.

“Why can’t you do it? You’re decent in writing as far as I remember.” I told him.

“Maybe. But not like yours as far as I remember” he told me back.

Does he really still remember? “Okay, so who’s the girl?” I asked.

“Do I really have to tell you?” he asked, a little distrustful.

“If you really want this to work then I have to know who I’m writing for.” I replied evenly.

“It’s Yoona” he said hesitantly.

Why am I not surprised? Of course, Im Yoona was considered the top girl in our year, ranking high in prettiness and charm. She may not be smart but she has a lot of boys doing her work for her. The only problem with her is that she only dates college boys so I doubt if he has a chance.

“Why her?” I asked again.

“Because everytime I see her, I get these butterflies in my stomach that wouldn’t go away. But she doesn’t know that I exist.” He said.

I was quiet for a minute thinking it over. Should I or shouldn’t I? This will be hard on so many levels but I have never turned down anyone before. I looked at him looking at me hopefully, and I saw a glimpse of the boy I knew before.

Oh! What the hell! “Give me some time. I’ll think of something.” I told him.

Over the week, I watched him more closely. Yoona never notices him even if he was nearby. Yoona was too preoccupied entertaining senior boys to give him her attention. And I would note the look of disappointment in him everytime. Once he caught me looking at him while he was preoccupied with Yoona. I looked away in panic.

Kwon Jiyong has never caught me looking before.