First, let me note that OSL has reached over 100 subscribers. Yey! :D
So for YOU my loyal readers, and also YOU my silent ones... Kamsamidaaa ^^

Three Years and Five Months Ago

It was Saturday morning when Siwon woke up especially early because he was planning on dropping by the Super Junior dorms to see his love. What happened the day before when Kyuhyun unexpectedly came by was all he had in mind the whole night. Of course he was happy, over the top, thrilled by their short moment of flirting slash happiness. However, he couldn’t help but question the reason to why the maknae suddenly turned that straightforward. As much as he loved that side of Kyuhyun, he wanted to make sure it would be permanent.

So, dressed up in his favorite clothing, Siwon drove to the dorms and happily stepped out of the elevator and into the eleven dorm where Kyuhyun was staying. Whistling, he excitedly headed to the living room where voices were being heard.

However, just as he was in sight, he heard some breaking sounds which made him rush inside, only to find Kyuhyun’s hand bleeding.

The latter was sitting on the couch, one hand holding a tablet, while the other one apparently shattered a glass of water he was holding by the force he was putting into, making a cut in his hand. The younger was shocked to see the blood dripping from Kyuhyun and so he rushed by his side and held his bleeding hand, examining the gravity of the cut.

“What happened?” Siwon asked, but Kyuhyun was only looking shocked and gazing at him with kind of watery eyes for a couple of seconds, before throwing the tablet onto the couch and shifting his gaze away from him.

“Come on, let’s clean it up” Siwon shrugged the uneasiness he felt and the stiff aura in the room with Hyukjae and Heechul standing nervously next to Kyuhyun, and the leader pacing in the living room, anger clearly showing on his face.

The younger helped Kyuhyun into the kitchen. He put the bleeding hand under the faucet and let the water wash away the blood so he could check if it needed stitches. The first things Siwon learned in med school were CPR and how to clean up a cut. Luckily, Kyuhyun’s injury didn’t need stitches because it would’ve been his first time doing it on a living person.

...

Siwon didn’t know what he should say or even if he should because of the way Kyuhyun was obviously sad and clearly doing his best to avoid looking into his eyes.

Did they possibly find out about me and Kyuhyun? But they wouldn’t act like this, would they? What can Kyuhyun possibly do to make his hyungs that angry?

"Didn't I say I love your hands?" Siwon admitted to lighten up the mood, but it didn't quite help.

...

They went back to the living room and Siwon helped Kyuhyun sit down on another couch, since there was glass scattered on the floor in the place he occupied before, while he sat on the table facing him. Heechul handed him the first-aid kit and Siwon couldn’t miss on the dumbfounded look on his face.

Silence was echoing in the room as no one talked. Siwon as well focused on tending to Kyuhyun’s hand, but seconds later his curiosity won over him.

“Is everything okay?” he asked, not really comfortable with the dark aura in the room. However, the answer he got was unexpected.

“You slept with her” Hyukjae exclaimed in a whisper, matter-of-factly, in his daze state as if he was thinking out loud. When he realized what he just said, he clamped a hand over his mouth while looking apologetically at Kyuhyun whose face snapped into his direction.

Siwon on the other hand froze in place, his mind was trying to process what he just heard. Her? Who’s her? And are they talking about Kyuhyun? 

His gaze finally landed on Kyuhyun and the way the latter was looking at him sent, a needle straight into his heart. The maknae had guilt and fear written all over his face, causing Siwon to think something was clearly wrong.

“S-siwon…”  Kyuhyun finally could mutter even though he had no idea what to say. However, he was soon cut off by the leader’s phone ringing.

“It’s Soo Man-ssi. Better pray there’s a solution” Leeteuk warned, causing Siwon to narrow his eyes in confusion, wondering what the hell did Kyuhyun do.

The leader turned around and exited the living room so he would speak privately, leaving Kyuhyun anxious about what might happen. The latter shifted his gaze back to Siwon, looking straight into his eyes with a pleading look as if asking him to just wait and believe in him. However, Siwon was far from understanding ever since the words ‘sleep’ and ‘her’ rang in his ears.

He quickly averted his gaze back to the hand he was taking care of. He continued his bandaging, not minding the begging look Kyuhyun was giving him. He was troubled to know what happened, but scared to know at the same time. He had a feeling it was something bad, and if Super Junior’s diva was silent, then he was right.

...

“Now you’re gonna have to date her!” Leeteuk stated after he returned to the room, sending another stab into Siwon’s heart.

“B-but hyung, I can’t!” Kyuhyun retorted but he knew as long as their president said so, there was nothing he could do about it.

“You should’ve thought about that before you slept with her!”

That was the pin that broke Siwon. His head snapped to look at Kyuhyun with a hurtful expression on his face, his eyes were  blurry with anger, and his mouth was slightly agape, just enough to make way to his gasps of air since his breathing was increasing. His body tensed up and he could no longer control his erratic heart rate.

“S-siwon it’s not what it looks like” Kyuhyun managed to whisper to Siwon but the latter was too blinded by fury to care about any explanation.

“And you just had to let yourself get pictured kissing her!”

Kyuhyun was seriously frustrated at his leader who kept on pouring water into oil and making the situation much worse. His eyes disobeyed him and shifted to the tablet on the couch on his side, making sure it was upside down. However, Siwon didn’t miss on it and stretched his hand to take it.

His breathing hitched and his face tensed up upon seeing an article about Kyuhyun and another girl. There was a picture of them kissing at a café, and as Siwon’s sight wander under it, he noticed that the picture was taking the earlier day, before Kyuhyun dropped by his dorm, and yet again another pang to his heart. Siwon's mind was a mess as it was thinking of all kinds of scenarios.

Kyuhyun stared at him in anxiety, his trembling hand rested on the boy’s knee, wanting to get his attention but Siwon refused to look at him. He blankly stared at the photo in front of him for several seconds before tossing the tablet back on the couch and focusing on finishing treating Kyuhyun’s hand.

Once done, he shrugged Kyuhyun’s hand from his knee which made Kyuhyun’s heart break, and abruptly stood up. As he took a step away, Kyuhyun stood up as well and gripped his wrist.

“P-please let me explain” Kyuhyun was almost begging which got the other members shocked to see that view. Of course, Heechul was the only one who knew the feelings between the two, and so Leeteuk and Hyukjae were mostly dumbstruck.

It only took Siwon a look into Kyuhyun’s face to let a lone tear fall on his face, causing the maknae to immediately free his hand as he was shocked of the hurtful look in Siwon’s dark orbs. The younger closed his eyes, inhaled and exhaled deeply before rushing out of the dorm.

“S-Siwon!” Kyuhyun shouted after him but Leeteuk stopped him.

“You’re not going anywhere. We need to clean up this mess”

“B-but hyung… I need to talk to him” Kyuhyun pleaded yet again, tears were now streaming down his face but he didn’t care to hide them. Leeteuk on the other hand, who had no idea what was going on between the two, was very angry that he wasn’t interested in knowing.

“I’ll go after him” Fortunately, Heechul stepped in and assured Kyuhyun that he would take care of Siwon and that he should take care of the mess he was in.

...

When Heechul stepped outside the dorm, there was no sight of Siwon so he decided to take his car to look for him. As he started driving through the busy streets, he finally caught on a familiar figure walking on the sidewalk with head hung low and hands in his jacket’s pockets.

Siwon was confused and hurt that when he stormed out of the dorm, he just started walking to no praticular direction as he just wanted to forget about the information he just found out. His tears were running down his cheeks and falling on the wet ground, making his sight blurry.

Heechul parked the car beside him and honked to get his attention. He had to do it several times though, since Siwon was clearly lost in thoughts. Then when the younger finally turned around to see where that voice was coming from, he caught on Heechul motioning for him to come closer.

Siwon sighed because he actually didn’t want to talk to anyone right then, but it was cold and his cheeks were already hurting from the chill weather mixed with his tears, so he decided to get in the car.

...

Heechul didn’t talk to him the whole ride which Siwon was grateful for. He wasn’t in any mood to talk and wasn’t ready to face the fact that Kyuhyun had slept with someone else. His tears couldn’t stop flowing until minutes later as he realized they were in front of his house.

When the tears turned to sobs and sniffs, Heechul finally decided to start coaxing the younger.

“It happened two months ago. I’m sure you weren’t even together”

What Heechul thought it was coaxing, actually turned into more sobbing and more heart breaking. Siwon’s face snapped at him in shock which made Heechul have no idea what he just did.

“T-Two months ago? That was after we got back from New York” Siwon stated, trying to figure out exactly what happened two months ago that Kyuhyun had to sleep with someone else.

“Did something happen in New York?” Heechul finally asked the question he was dying to know the answer of, ever since he noticed the weird looks the boys were giving each other after that trip.

“It doesn’t matter now. I can’t believe he did that! Chullie hyung, what am I supposed to do now?”

Tears started to run down his face again and he shifted his gaze to the window so the chill air could stop the stinging in his eyes.

Heechul had no idea what to say next, so he just sat silently waiting for Siwon’s tears to dry out again. However, a minute later, his eyes bulged out at Siwon’s confession.

“We made love” It was a low whisper, as if Siwon was trying to weep over his broking heart and the betrayal he got after giving his virtue to Kyuhyun.

“You did WHAT?” Heechul knew it wasn’t the time to pry over what his little maknae and Siwon did, but he couldn’t help but be surprised.

“He slept with someone else. Kyuhyun, my Kyuhyun, made love to someone else” Siwon continued whispering, not really caring about the wide look on his hyung’s face, or the dropping jaw. He sighed, clutching one hand over his chest, right above his broken heart, while closing his eyes, hoping it was all a dream,  a horrible nightmare, and he would soon wake up to find Kyuhyun next to him.

...

24 hours earlier

Kyuhyun’s POV:

I’m not usually a morning person but that day I found myself sitting on my bed at a very early hour, while staring at a certain blue box on the night stand table. It was the necklace Siwon gave me on my birthday saying when I wear it, it would mean I accepted his feelings.

After our weekend in New York, I couldn’t seem to get him out of my mind. He was all I’ve thought about for the long run. That night we shared together was magical and I had never experienced something like that before. The pleasure, the heat, the love, it was all wonderful. However, I couldn’t help but feel a little bit scared and anxious, maybe even insecure.

When we got back to Seoul, he had to go to his college and I had an album to prepare for, so we never actually talked about what happened. He would visit the dorms on the weekends, but I couldn’t get any time to talk to him alone. I didn’t know if I even wanted to talk to him privately, but I knew my heart was urging me to.

However, a month later, as I had a KRY recording in SM, I ran into SeoHyun from SNSD. I always knew she had a crush on me but I was never interested in her. That day, we talked normally as two colleagues but I couldn’t help feel something weird inside me. I didn’t like her that was for sure, but it felt different than with Siwon.

Later on, she invited me to her house and as much as my heart warned me not to, my head worked faster and agreed. Once we reached her apartment, we watched a movie and had a couple of glasses of wine, before I ended up lying on the couch with her on top of me. I had no idea what got into me, but I knew it wasn’t the alcohol effect because I have a high tolerance.

First, she leaned to kiss my lips, but I remember turning my face and so the kiss landed on my cheek instead. Her lips felt nothing like Siwon’s and I didn’t want her kissing me on the lips. As she was lying on top of me, I suddenly felt something rising up in my stomach. The first thought that came to me was that why am I at the bottom? So I instantly flipped us so I would be on top, and as much as my heart was still telling me it didn’t feel right, I couldn’t ignore the fact that I’m a man and that was how it was supposed to be.

When I was lost in thoughts, she had already taking off her shirt and mine and I just went with it. There were no feelings involved, just ing to prove to myself something that now I realize it didn’t make any sense.  I still didn’t let her kiss me on the lips because even when I’m sleeping with her, the thought of my lips only belonging to Siwon never left my mind.

...

After I was done, I wore my clothes and left. I can’t lie that I regretted it right away because it felt nothing like the way I felt with Siwon. His touches, his kisses, his throbbing heart beating over mine, it was the best thing I could ever go through and I realized it was exactly that what I wanted. Siwon, and only Siwon. I feel bad that it took me sleeping with someone else to realize he was the one I actually wanted, but I was ready to do anything to prove it to him.

So that was why, I was sitting on my bed staring at that piece of jewellery that I knew once I wear it, Siwon would be the happiest guy on earth. He once told me that when it comes to love, it’s not about what you know in your head, but about what you feel in your heart. I know exactly what he meant now. My heart was aching for him for a while now but I didn’t have the courage to admit it.

...

Sleeping with Seohyun was just a way to tell myself that I can do it, that I’m not a woman someone could just . Maybe I was trying to check that I wasn’t gay after all? But I was wrong, dead wrong. Not about me being gay because I couldn’t imagine myself with someone other than Siwon, maybe I was only meant to be with him, if not, I would never be with another guy. However, what I was dead wrong about was that it didn’t matter me being the bottom as long as I got to be loved by him. Siwon made me feel happy in every way possible. I didn’t care if I was the one on top or the one at the bottom as long as I get to be loved by him.

I took a deep breath before reaching the box and taking out the necklace. I stared at it for a while, admiring it and feeling flattered because it once belonged to his mother so it was special, then I stood up and walked to the mirror as I wrapped the necklace around my neck. Once the pendant was lying peacefully over my chest, I knew right away that I was doing the right thing.

After having enough of staring at it, I decided to take a shower and get ready for my schedule. When I got dressed, I hid the necklace under my sweater so no one could see it. I wanted to surprise Siwon. I wanted to finally tell him my feelings then show it to him.

...

When I got back to the dorms, I locked myself in my room thinking about tons of stuff as I played my favorite game, even though I couldn’t quite concentrate. So after a while, I decided to go on a drive. However, as I stepped out of the dorm, I received a call from Seohyun wanting to meet me. I declined but she insisted and so I went to meet her in a café down town.

She was already waiting for me, sitting in a table by the window. I could see she got excited after seeing me but I knew I had to tell her the truth. She needed to know that that night meant nothing and that it was a mistake.

As we ordered our drinks, she started talking about that night and I immediately cut her off, not wanting to embarrass her if she was planning on confessing or something. I honesty told her the truth and she was silently listening to each word I said. However, just when I was relieved seeing how she slightly nodded, her lips were on mine in a swift move leaving me startled but I pushed her away.

She apologized while I wiped her kiss away, wanting to get rid of her touch. I paid for our drinks and immediately rushed out of the café. I couldn’t believe she kissed me after clearly telling her I wasn’t interested. I wanted Siwon’s kiss to be the last one on my lips but she ruined it for me.

I was so lost in thoughts that I didn’t realize I was in front of Siwon’s college. I turned my face to the side and caught on a super market there. I parked my car and headed to buy something from there. My feet went directly to the wine section as I chose one of my favorites, paid for it, and yet again found myself standing in front of Siwon’s dorm.

The look I got after he opened the door for me was priceless. He clearly didn’t expect seeing me at his door step which was also unexpected for me as well. However, since I came all the way there, I may just get it over with and end the longing of our hearts.

When he mentioned that I was his first everything, I could feel my cheeks burning as our night together flashed into my mind. The hot sensation I felt when he was inside me, and the love he showed me was making my heart flutter.

When I pretended I was mad and about to leave, he pulled me into his lap and I was so happy at that moment. His lips captured mine and I felt total bliss. When we parted for air, I thought it was the perfect time to tell him how I felt. However, before I do, my phone started ringing and it was a call from Teukkie hyung. I knew I could ignore it, but didn’t want to get disturbed later because I knew the leader won’t give up until I pick up.

Sadly, Teukki hyung’s tone sounded very urgent and so I had to leave Siwon. He whined of course which I thought it was super cute, but we still had time now that I completely understood what I was feeling for him.

We kissed, and kissed again before I had to leave. The next day Siwon would stop by the dorm and maybe I could take him back to our old dorm and confess to him at our balcony? That would be the perfect spot, and hopefully it would make him forget about the bad memories he got there.

I only have to wait until tomorrow…

...

Three Years and Two Months Ago

Kyuhyun’s POV

It had been the worst three months in my entire life. I didn’t speak or see Siwon ever since that day when he found out I slept with someone else. I tried to call him but he never picked up any of my hundreds of calls. To make things harder, the company cramped my schedules into more shows, more singing, more acting that I didn’t even have time to scratch my head. I swear it was like they did it on purpose because of my messed up situation.

The image of Siwon that day, the look on his eyes, the way he gazed at me with hurtful orbs, had never left my mind ever since. Every inch of my body hurt, my heart stung, my face had dark circles from the lack of sleep, and my eyes are red from crying all night. I missed Siwon so much and I knew I hurt him, but what else could I do to make him forgive me?

I had to leave for China in a week and so I decided that I would try my best to talk to him before leaving. Siwon never came to the dorms again, but I knew from Hyukjae hyung that he would be in Donghae’s house that weekend. So without further thinking, I took my car and drove there. My heart was racing with fear and anxiety, but mostly with kind of excitement that I would get to see Siwon who I missed dearly.

...

“Oh, Kyuhyun-ah! What are you doing here?”

“Hae hyung, are you going somewhere?”

“Yes. I’m meeting Hyukkie. Is everything okay?”

“Y-Yes. I’m here to see Siwon”

“Oh, he just got here. He’s in his room”

“Thanks hyung”

I took a step further from Hae hyung but I was stopped with his next words.

“Kyun-ah, no matter what happened between the two of you… fix it”

“I-I don’t know what you’re talking about”

I stuttered while averting my gaze to the floor.

“First, I’m not blind. Second, I’m your best friend and Siwon's brother... I know something happened”

 Was it that clear that something was going on between us?

“Talk to him, because he’s not the little brother I know anymore”

I shyly nodded before turning around and heading to the stairs. My heart was beating loudly with each step I took. Once I reached his door, I took a deep breath before raising my hand to knock. However, before I could do, Siwon opened the door and was standing in front of me.

There was a big shock on his face, clearly he didn’t expect seeing me at his house. He also had some dark circles under his eyes and I knew he was suffering. I felt bad about it because I never wanted to hurt him, but since I’m there, I would fix things and hopefully I would be forgiven.

Unfortunately, as I parted my lips to speak, suddenly a wave of air hit me in the face, and I was left there standing by myself. By the time I realized what just happened, I heard a loud bang from the front door.

...

I really needed to talk to him but he never gave me a chance to. He just ran away from me. I should’ve told him about my feelings before. I should’ve been the one to tell him about Seohyun. Now it was too late. He hated me. If only he knew how much I loved him, if only he would let me explain myself.

...

Siwon’s POV

Kyuhyun… I fell for you but you just made me always hope for you. In the end all the hope you gave me was fake. The worst thing was that you made me believe that we could actually become something. That I had a chance with you…

...

Kyuhyun had with someone else… Kyuhyun shared his body with someone other than me… Kyuhyun had never loved me. That was all I’ve been thinking about for the last couple of months. After that heartbreaking revelation, I’ve never seen him again. I became a mess after realizing that he cheated, well not that exact word since we weren’t technically together, but considering the relationship we had… I called it cheating.

The thing that hurt the most was giving himself to someone else even though he misled me into thinking he was opening up to me, that he was falling in love with me. I was like some kid that was given a toy and had it snatched from his hands right after. I laid my heart for him, loved him, cherished him, but apparently he never felt the same way.

Maybe he thought he felt something for me, but it clearly wasn’t enough since he had slept with someone else. The worst thing was that he had been seeing her behind my back. He kissed her the same day he dropped by my dorm and kissed me as well. How could he do that to me? He knew exactly how much I loved him, how long I’ve waited for him, but he crushed me. He stepped on my heart like it was nothing, like I didn’t matter to him.

After two months of grieving and a lot of thinking, I found him on my room door. I couldn’t think of anything but run away. What was he expecting me to do? Hug him? Kiss him? Or maybe tell him that I forgave him and that he could go back to his new girlfriend? Was he expecting me to be his friend maybe? I couldn’t stand being in the same room with him, not after the heartache and pain I went through. I wouldn’t let him get away with the guilt. As much as I loved him, he should feel guilty, because if he had the least bit of love or even respect for me, I should’ve been there in the back of his mind when he was ing that girl. Was it worth it? Throwing me and my feelings aside like a piece of garbage… was it worth it, hyung?

...

Three Years and One Month Ago

At Star King

MC: Welcome everyone, today we have special guests that you all know and squeal about. Please give a hand for SUPER JUNIOR!

As the crowd started clapping for the famous band, the boys bowed and thanked them before taking their seats. The episode started as usual with a lot of laughter and different performances until it was time for the last one.

MC: Okay everyone, our last guest is actually someone you may know because the Super Junior members do. It’s CHOI SIWON!

Everyone started clapping again, welcoming the familiar guest who was no other than Choi Donghae’s brother. The latter was kind of surprised upon seeing his little brother on stage since he had no idea about him participating in the show, but he was smiling nonetheless.

Meanwhile, one particular member wasn’t as quite relieved about seeing Siwon. Cho Kyuhyun was the most surprised one to see Siwon right there on stage. It had been a month since that fleeing incident, and since then they never met again. Kyuhyun wanted to give the boy more time to cool down before talking to him, and so seeing him right then in front of him, was making his heart beating from the ache of missing him.

MC: Hello young Choi! How are you doing today?

Siwon: I’m fine Ho dong-ssi. Thank you for letting me be here today.

MC: So, you’re quite familiar with our guests. Except your brother, do you have a special relationship with any one of them?

All the members except one, were smiling widely at him, seeing how their little Siwon was confidently standing on stage and looking as handsome as ever. They had missed him in the last few months, but they were busy as hell to even notice the reason why he wasn’t around much.

Kyuhyun on the other hand, was keeping his head low not daring to look up. He missed Siwon alright, but he couldn’t take on seeing another hurtful look in those dark orbs. Not when knowing exactly that he was the reason behind it.

Heechul eyed him the second he walked in to the stage, throwing glances between him and the maknae, trying to figure out a way to make those two talk. Heechul had been in touch with Siwon during his grief, even if it was a phone call between his busy schedule, and the younger appreciated talking to someone who knew what was going on between him and Kyuhyun.

Siwon: Well, actually, I was living in the US until I was 16 years old, and when I moved here to live with Donghae hyung, they honestly have been so good to me ever since. I’m glad to have known them.

MC: Ah that sounds great. So, Siwon-ssi, what brought you here today? Are you here to compete?

Siwon: Actually, no. I don’t know how to say it but I’m here to send a message?

MC: How so?

Siwon: Well, I kind of want to take this opportunity to sing a song for someone. I don’t want to be counted as one of the contestants, so I’ll just sing and be on my way.

MC: I see. Well I don’t mind at all. So is this someone your girlfriend?

Siwon: Just someone I love.

That statement sure made Kyuhyun snap his head up, but only to regret it since Siwon was intensely staring at him. Fortunately for him, the MC interrupted the younger’s gaze who immediately glanced at the audience and gave them one of his smiles. However, it wasn't the dimpled one that Kyuhyun missed so much, which got him wondering when he would be able to see it again.

MC: So, what will you be performing?

Siwon: Singing “Annyeong Jeongmal Goodbye” (This is really goodbye)

MC: Okay then. Good luck

Siwon bowed at Ho Dong-ssi before turning to face the audience once again. He raised the mike to his mouth and closed his eyes, waiting for the music to start playing.

As the first notes left the studio speakers, Siwon started singing…

...
♫♪
Where did you go, the you who just passed me by and left?
Are you doing fine, at a place without me by your side?
Hoping you’ll come back, the times I’ve waited for you
I’ll let it go now, I’ll forget you now

I know I said I’ll always wait for you, but I’m tired Kyuhyun-ah. My heart is aching in want, but I know I can’t have you anymore…

The beautiful times we had, they’re all memories now
The tears I shed when I missed you like crazy
Hoping you’ll come back, time stood stagnant
I’ll let you go and leave now, goodbye

The time we spent together, I’ll cherish it deep in my heart. You’ll always be my first love but I’m hurt and broken and I don’t want to be like this…

Couldn’t you find it, the road that leads to me?
Should I wait a little while more, should I wait here a little longer?
Hoping you’ll come back, I waited all this while
I’ll let it go now, I’ll end it for real

If only you hadn’t went to someone else, I was willing to wait a bit longer. However, you don’t know how much love I have for you, because if you did, we wouldn’t be in this situation now…

My love for you that I held on so tightly, is slowly dissipating
The me that went crazy missing you, is gradually changing
Hoping you’ll come back, time has stood stagnant
I should erase it all now, for real

I don’t know how much it will take me, but I’m ready to move on. I can’t live like this. I need to let you go. Our moments together would only be memories in my heart…

My love, it ends right here, this never-ending yearning
Stuck in my throat, I couldn’t say it
Those heartbreaking words of parting
All my beautiful memories of you, it’s leaving me right now

Guess I know what you meant now…

“Love may be the greatest force in the universe, but it can also be the most destructive feeling as well”

Yearn, want, need, desire, ache… It all has to stop right here. I’ll forget about you no matter how hard that seems, because my one sided love isn’t going anywhere…

Like falling tears, my love is slowly dissipating
The me that went crazy missing you, is gradually changing
Hoping you’ll come back, time stood stagnant
I should erase it now, for real
Should erase it now,
I should forget you now, goodbye
♫♪

I can’t stick around and watch you with someone other than me. You have a girlfriend now and as much as it kills me to think about it, I’ll be leaving you Kyu. I’ll be disappearing from your life.

I love you so much my lovely Kyuhyun. Thank you for everything you gave me so far. There’s nothing I regret more than not doing my best in making you believe in how much I love you.

However, it looks like I kept my promise after all… Too bad it wasn’t in my advantage. If I knew that by making you open up your heart again, you’ll fall for someone else, maybe I wouldn’t have done it.

“I love you Cho Kyuhyun. And because I love you, I want to see you happy. No matter what it takes, I’m going to make you believe in love again. It doesn’t matter if you don’t love me because as long as you’re happy, I’m happy. I’m going to let you see how I feel about you no matter how long it will take. Because Cho Kyuhyun... I love you”

Guess I was wrong. I’m not happy…

So until I can be okay again... Annyeong, Kyu hyung.

...

“Hae hyung, I’m going to transfer”

“What? Why? Don’t you like your current college?”

“I don’t mean college, I mean I’ll transfer to another city”

“B-but Siwon…”

“I’m sorry hyung. I really am, but I can’t live here anymore. I’m going back to the US”

“Does it have anything to do with Kyuhyun?”

“It’s not his fault. It’s my decision to move away”

"When will you come back?"

"When my heart heals maybe..."

...

The Present Day

At Seoul

“Hello?”

> Oppa <

“Didn’t I tell you to stop calling me? I don’t want to hear your voice. We’re not together anymore, so please don’t call me again”

> But oppa, I miss you <

“Yeah, we all have someone we miss. Look, I can’t talk to you because you remind me of the biggest mistake of my life. I’m sorry seohyun-ssi, but you have to let me go. Goodbye”

...

At Los Angeles

♫♪ Gee Gee Gee Gee Baby Baby Baby
♫♪ Gee Gee Gee Gee Baby Baby Baby

“WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING?”

Minho, who is cheerfully singing while doing the dishes, is startled to hear his friend's voice creeping behind him that he almost dropped the glass in his hand.

“Oh, Siwon-ah you scared me!”

There is rage and anger in Siwon's eyes as he puts both hands on his hips and glares at his friend.

“Minho. I don’t EVER want to hear a song of that group in THIS house. Didn’t I make myself clear before?”

“Yah, Siwon! No need to get all worked up over a dumb song”

“Minho, please just do as I say. I HATE THAT SONG AND I HATE WHO SINGS IT, AM I CLEAR?”

“Gee, I don’t even know who sings it... Yeah, yeah, arasso”

Siwon turns around and stroms out of the kitchen, leaving Minho dumbfounded as he never saw his friend that angry over a song before. The next slam on the door makes him jump in his place and drops the glass into the sink, causing it to break.

"This has to stop, and I know exactly what will put an end to all of this"

Please don't shoot me :p
I feel sad as well for this, but it had to be written, right? >.<
I'm going to hand out some tissues now... Sorry!