“Would you stop staring at that picture?”

“I wasn’t staring”

“Oh yeah? And what were you doing? Drooling over it?”

“Minho-ah, how do you think he’s doing?”

“He’s probably fine. He’s an Idol, his life is perfect”

“I just hope he’s happy”

“You're a really good guy Siwon. You just need to realize that your crush had been going on for too long”

“Six years Minho, Six long years”

…

That’s me, Choi Siwon, a guy who’s been in love for six years. Yep, six years with the same man.
Unfortunately, it always had been a One Sided Love and it still is.

Want to go on a journey with me? Well come on, let’s see how it all started and how I ended up here.

…

Six years Ago

“Siwon-ah! I’m so glad you’re here”

Donghae excitedly hugged his little brother as he picked him up from the airport.

“Hyung! It’s so good to see you”

“Yah! You’re almost as tall as me now”

“Well I’m Sixteen hyung” Siwon pouted making Donghae crush him into another bear hug.

“I missed you little brother”

“I missed you too Hyung … but I need air!”

Donghae finally let go of the hug and took Siwon’s luggage as they started walking out of the airport.

In The Car

“Seoul … Here I am again”

“I’m glad you’re back”

“Yeah. Grams and Gramps started to lose their minds as they aged. They said hi by the way”

“Haha, come on just because they wanted to tour the world doesn’t mean they lost their minds!”

“Tsk, I was fine there and I have a lot of friends, but now I have to start a new life here”

“You’ll get used to it. Just be sociable and you’ll get through it”

“Hyung! Who said I’m not sociable? Just because you’re an idol, Tsk. You think you’re that famous?”

“I don’t think. I know”

“Now I’m gonna be known as the pampered brother of the fishy superstar”

“Oh, you do watch me”

“No I don’t”

“And how did you know about my nickname? Fishy?”

“I guessed?”

“Haha yeah right. You are a fan, you just don’t want to admit it”

“Hyung I’m not!”

Donghae didn’t want to tease his brother any longer. He would have plenty of time to do that later since Siwon would be living with him from now on.

…

Donghae and Siwon had a rough life. Their parents decided to split up when Siwon was only ten years old. They actually had been happy and in love, not to mention a very good parents to their kids. However, their father got a job opportunity in the US and he couldn’t miss out on it. He asked his wife to join him with the kids but due to her job and Donghae being a trainee in SM, she couldn’t accept.

So as a mutual agreement, Donghae had to stay in Korea with his mother, while Siwon had to leave for the US with his father. The latter was very young then, and so he didn’t quite understand why he had to be apart from his mom and hyung, but his father told him that they would be joining them later which Siwon looked forward to for a long time. However, a year later, Siwon got the news that his mother died because of a car accident, luckily he was only eleven years old and didn't quite understand what death really meant yet. So as time passed by, and as his grandparents moved in to take care of him, Siwon grew to realize that no matter how much he waited, his mom and brother won't be joining them. 

At that time, Mr.Choi asked Donghae to come and live with them but the latter, who was already sixteen years old, reasoned with his father that he was big enough to take care of himself. Moreover, he had his band mates and the company, even though it didn't make up on missing his little brother.

So like that, the Choi brothers had to live apart even though they never lost contact with each other, if it was internet chatting, phone calls or when SM would let Donghae fly to the US for a day or two, they would meet and hang out together.

Four years later, and as Siwon started to live with the idea of being just him, his grandparents and his father, the latter unfortunately got sick and passed away, leaving the fifteen years old kid broken and miserable, so he decided to go back to Korea because he had no reason to stay seperated from his brother anymore.

It had been six years since they were apart, so once Siwon finished his sophomore year, he took the first plane to Seoul to be with his brother. 

After being finally reunited, both Siwon and Donghae were really excited about it. They were happy to see each other again and they would for sure make up for their lost time together.

…

“Are you sure it’s okay for you to live outside the dorm?”

“Don’t worry. I talked to our leader and he said it’s okay, but I may have to stay there in some nights when I have an early schedule”

“Thanks. Even though you don’t have to live with me”

Donghae’s eyes turned gloomy as he hit the brakes and glanced at Siwon.

“Don’t you ever say that again. I know what you have been through and I’m going to make it up to you. I promise”

As much as he tried to hide it, Siwon was really happy to be back home and living with his hyung. A smile pulled at the corners of his mouth at that tought, making Donghae’s eyes watery when two dimples showed up on Siwon's cheeks as he remembered how he used to feel jealous and nag his parents because he wanted dimples as well.

…

“So this is the dorm. I want you to meet my friends”

“You mean the other idols?”

“I know you want to meet them”

“No I don’t!”

Siwon retorted making Donghae playfully stuck his tongue out at him before getting out of the car.

…

As Siwon stepped inside the dorm, he was quite shocked at first with how many shoes there were at the entrance. Donghae picked up on the question mark because he clarified “We’re ten”

Siwon muttered a wow just by moving his lips before letting his brother guide him inside to the kitchen, where all of the members were apparently having dinner.

“Hey guys!”

“Oh Hae, you’re back!” Leeteuk exclaimed before being pushed out of the way and a certain anchovy ran to stand in front of him.

“So? Is that him?” Hyukjae excitedly asked while pointing at Siwon, leaving Donghae smiling at his friend’s childish act before nodding.

“Yes, this is him. Everyone, meet Siwon … My little brother” Donghae announced proudly making Siwon blush as he bowed to everyone.

“Annyeongasseyo, Choi Siwon inmida”

Hyukjae soon ran again and hugged Siwon, leaving the latter startled and staring at his brother who just threw his arms in the air. After that sudden hug, Donghae started introducing everyone …

“So, I know it’s a lot of names but just focus” He threw one arm around Siwon’s shoulder before adding “I’ll start from older to youngest. Jungsoo hyung aka Leeteuk our leader, Heechul hyung, Yesung hyung, Kangin hyung, Shindong hyung, Sungmin hyung, Hyukjae hyung aka Eunhyuk, Ryeowook-ah and there’s our maknae … where is he?”

“He has a doctor’s appointment” replied Sungmin

“Oh okay, you’ll meet him later. So now you know everyone”

“Give him a break Hae, how is he supposed to memorise eight Korean names by you stating them that fast” Heechul snapped at Donghae but before the latter could say anything, Siwon was already stating each one’s name, leaving everyone in the room surprised by how he didn’t get any name wrong.

The fact is, Siwon is smart, very smart. So memorising names was one of the easiest things to do. That sure made Super Junior diva shut up, which no one had ever been able to do.

“Tsk. We’re super stars of course you know our names”

“Not really. I’m sixteen, I’m a junior in high school and I have a lot to do than be a fanboy”

Everyone was quite shocked because no one had confronted Heechul before. They know better not to mess with him.

“Sixteen and a junior? Who are you kidding?”

“I’m smart, I skipped a grade”

Fire was shooting from Heechul’s eyes by then and Donghae was prepared to drag his brother out in order to avoid any chaos, but unexpectedly, Heechul smirked as he said “I like you” before leaving the kitchen while his dignity was still intact... Well kind of.

…

So after the introduction being done, they all gathered in the living room, some sitting on the couch and others crouching on the floor since there wasn’t so much space, plus the fact that they were like a soccer team. Siwon had Donghae sitting next to him from one side and a very excited Hyukjae from the other side which Siwon couldn’t figure why yet.

They were watching a movie while eating popcorn that Ryeowook made, which Siwon later found out that he was the one doing the cooking in the dorm. So as they were all concentrated, even Siwon surprisingly, the dorm’s door was heard open and soon after, a pale and skinny guy walked in.

“Oh, Kyuhyun-ah”

Donghae called out and Siwon figured it must be the last member of Super Junior that they said he had a doctor’s appointment. He didn’t realize that he was staring at the guy until Donghae tapped him with his elbow getting his attention back, and when he did, Kyuhyun already disappeared into the kitchen and not until a few seconds later, that Siwon saw him getting out again, heading towards the stairs and without stopping he stated,

“I’m tired. I’ll take a shower and sleep”

And Siwon did not know just what hit him upon hearing that voice. His heart started pounding in his chest and he did not know what that feeling was. He averted his gaze back to the TV screen but didn’t focus on the movie. He was just secretly trying to calm his beating heart and trying to figure out just why it was acting that way.

…

On The Way Home

“So was that guy earlier … the maknae?”

“Who? Kyuhyun? Ah, yes. Sorry I didn’t get the chance to introduce you to him. He was tired and directly headed to his room to sleep”

“It’s okay”

“I’m glad you got along with them, because you’ll be seeing a lot from each other in the future”

“Yeah. Sure” Siwon leaned his head on the side window as a smile graced his lips...

We’ll be seeing each other again, Kyuhyun-ssi.

So enough of the cheesy, all about looks Siwon. It's now the smart, well still handsome, heartbroken dongsaeng Siwon XD
Since Kyu has being crying a lot in my other fics, let's make Siwon suffer a little bit [even though I feel bad about it :( ]
Anyway, this is like an introduction, so more information will be in the upcoming chapters
^^
Thank you so much for the subscribes and hopefully I won't disappoint any of you x)