Donghae

Hello. I am gong to give you a boring introduction to myself. My name is Donghae. I have no idea why my mother would give me such name. She was probably drunk, but, she is always drunk so no change in my life really. It makes me feel a little better knowing that she is only verbally abusive and not physically. I also have one friend who takes me away from this abuse a lot. I always spend the night at her house and we always hang out. That helps me with depression. Being sad would be like being happy for me. Depression doesn't describe me in any way close to what I actually feel. The word depression is just a word to describe people who are not getting that their lives are worth living. So what your boyfriend dumps you, at least you had someone to love you and have friends who will be there to pick you up when you fall, no reason to get depressed over it. Seriously, I have an actual reason to be like this. I feel as though I can't exactly explain that reason at the moment. It has to do with the past and the present. Another big thing about me is that I have never said anything. My first words are still waiting to come out. They don't want to and I don't want them to either. I was a mute from the second I was born, the only glimpse you can ever get of my voice is when I make small sounds like whimpers or sobs or screams and such. Laughs and giggles is something I do not do. Maybe someday the world will accept me for who I am and why I am a mute. Forget the last part, there is no way in hell I am ever telling people why I'm mute. Jessica knows but that is because she has known me since we were babies. She knows why I don't talk and she knows why. That is between me and her completely.

I don't do good with other people. You know, talkative people. They don't understand me and think I'm just doing this as an act. I have a pefectly good reason, but it makes me feel selfish and guilty though because there are people out there with even better reasons which means I shouldn't be ing about it. 

Panophobia is part of my reason, but my panophobia came to realization in my past. My past is something I would rather not remember. Something I think nobody would ever want to remember. Jessica was a part of that past, a good side to it but the rest is dark and shouldn't be remembered. 

"Donghae, open up!" Jessica shouted to my window since I was to busy thinking, I couldn't hear her knocking. My mother is probably passed out drunk downstairs. I do love her, I just don't like her. 

I quickly opened the door and Jessica tackled me into a tight hug. She did a quick glance around and then stood up, dusting invisible dirt off her ripped skinny jeans. 

"Where is the momster?" it made me feel slightly better at her sense of humor. She used tricky words and then used humor to make someone laugh, but Jessica knows I don't laugh, giggle, or smile for that matter. I think my lips forgot how to smile, since obviously, I have never smiled. My lack of emotion annoys people. Jessica knows me though, so she understands. 

I pointed to the bedroom door to answer Jessica's question. She nodded and approched the bedroom slowly, peering in to see if my mother was really in there. When she backed away and grabbed my hand smiling I knew that we were safe, my mother was obviously passed out drunk. 

Once we got outside Jessica looked at me and smiled, "There is going to be a new kid at school!" she yelled, one of the neighbors dogs started barking. 

I nodded and looked down. If the new kid was a boy, then look out, Jessica is aiming to get him. She loves boys and can be a bit of a at times, no offense to her. She will go out with a guy only to get her heart broken, then she will try again. But I like boys too, but who would want me. Nobody, that's who. The new kid would find it annoying how quiet I was and then insult me and walk away to become friends with someone better. Jessica is biual though, but she leans more towards the boys since all of her girlfriends have broken her heart by cheating, which their usually worse than the boys Jessica dates so she is always leaning towards the boys.  

I pulled my notepad out of my bookbag and quickly jotted something down and handed it to Jessica.

You know that the new kid might find me annoying and won't even want to talk to us.

"Stop talking like that, the new kid could be really nice and understanding, I know nobody else knows about your past but me, but I think it would be nice if we could expand our little group to more than just us. It could be a really hot guy or a really y girl, and they could be really cool!" she shouted, causing the hearing in one of my ears to fade just a tad. 

I took back my notebook and wrote a response down.

You know that people find my silence annoying and what chance do we have that the new kid will be an understanding person, nobody at our school is like that so what makes you think the new kid will be any different. The new kid is probably going to be a weird jock cheerleader thing. And you know how I do around new people, anybody for that matter. You could introduce me to a pineapple and I would still shy away.

I handed Jessica the notebook, my handwriting was sloppy and kind of hard to read, and my hand was cramping up. Writing too much can hurt. 

"You should really learn sign language, I know it and you should learn it, it's getting harder to read your handwriting since you're coming out of your shell, anyway, come out of your shell to the new kid, it could have positive results you know," she waved her finger at me and smiled.

I bit my lip, a little unsure of this. Meeting new people is not for me, exactly. Jessica is bright and likes to talk. She is always out there talking to someone, but, what's weird about that is that she is an outcast at our school. It's probably how she dresses, everyone is labeled here and she was labeled an emo. Something nobody wants to be or talk to. I was of course labeled a mute, same stature as an emo except the don't talk to them hint is taken literally. 

I feel like the school is a kingdom. We all fit into a certain social label. The jocks are the kings, the cheerleaders are the queens/s-towards-the-jocks, the nerds are the "king's" slaves, the druggies are the rebels that don't follow the king's rules but are still popular with the cheerleaders, the emos and mutes are the outcasts. Jessica is the only emo and I am the only mute. Sad seeing as another mute would make me feel comfortable.

"Oh my god..." Jessica breathed, staring at the school entrance. I followed her gaze and saw what she was staring at. I did a mental 'oh my god' and looked back at Jessica. She looked at me and grinned.

"We have to meet him!" she grabbed my hand and ran towards the new kid. I wanted to shout but I wouldn't waste my words on this. I wouldn't even speak if it was a life or death choice. 

Jessica snuck up behind the new kid and tapped him on the shoulder. I was hiding behind Jessica. 

"Hi!" she greeted the new kid with a loud shout.

"'Hello, may I ask who you are?" Oh my god, He's also beautiful. His hair was black. His skin was pale, but a hint of a tan was showing. His brown eyes were lined with golden streaks, a dark circle glowing around the brown and bronze, only making his eyes that much more beautiful. He was wearing gray skinny jeans that hugged every possible part of his legs and his, only loose around his, manhood. I blushed slightly at the thought and then looked down a little. The new kid's shirt was a tight black v-neck that showed his muscles which were big but not huge. There were no blemishes or scars that I could see on his skin, he was utterly perfect. 

"My name is Jessica, I'm glad to meet you, uhh-"

"Eunhyuk, my name is Eunhyuk, so why did you come to greet me?" The name Eunhyuk was incredibly amazing and unique. I liked it quite much.

"I wanted to meet the new kid and show you the school, you know," Jessica was shaking slightly, showing she was nervous. It's obvious she has a crush on the boy, I'll admit that he is beautiful but crushes are for when you get to know he person.

"Where are your friends?" Eunhyuk asked Jessica, obviously not noticing me yet. Why would he though. He is cute and seems nice so far, and he is straight for all I can tell. Him looking down Jessica's shirt is what is proving exactly that to me. I don't have a crush on him though!Not yet at least.

"My friends," Jessica pointed to herself and looked at the ground nervously, "I only have one friend, but don't run now, please," Jessica's tone was heartbreaking because she was scared of being rejected. I don't blame her, rejection is a horrible thing and from this beautiful creature it would be even more horrible, "I have him with me actually, um, but don't freak out or anything," she mumbled before slowly stepping to the side. I gulped and looked down as Eunhyuk looked down. 

"What is your name?" Eunhyuk asked me, well, here is where Jessica steps in.

"He doesn't speak, never has, his first words are still waiting to come out, and he, uh, doesn't really smile either," Jessica rubbed the back of her neck nervously. 

"why not?" his Voice was smooth and sent a shiver down my spine each time he spoke a sentence.

"Uh, I think we should go to class!" Jessica grabbed my hand and started walking towards the school once she saw my eyes glaze over with tears. Eunhyuk followed close behind, probably wondering why we ran off.

"I'm truly sorry if I said anything to offend the little guy," at least he didn't call me kid. If he did then I know I wouldn't ever have a chance with him. 

"Um, you didn't say anything to offend him," Jessica's tone was coated in worry. I squeezed her hand as a way to remind her she didn't really have to worry because I wouldn't feel more depressed about it. Jessica glanced at me and smiled a little, ruffling my hair. Eunhyuk stood awkwardly to the side as students started to stare, at him. Who wouldn't stare at the new student though? Aside from that, Eunhyuk is beautiful, even the blind would look.

"Alright then, erm, Jessica, would you show me around here, I don't really know my way around," Eunhyuk rubbed he back of his neck nervously and stared around.

Jessica grabbed his hand and walked towards the office, holding both our hands. She did look kind of like a but I know she isn't. Innocent and naïve is what she is, with sarcasm and obsessive-boy-disorder coating that. She doesn't chase after the girls as much as she does the guys. 

"Mr. SooMan!" Jessica shouted into the principle's office, poking her head in. The principle found Jessica annoying but also entertaining. 

"Yes, Jessica?" His tone was full or bordom and no expression of emotions,like me.

"We have a new student and he claims that he didn't get his schedule, you think that would look good on your job paper?" Jessica wasn't the smartest person either, she didn't know much about politics or jobs, but I don't really either. 

She was smart when it came to other things such as math and science, not so much social studies because she usually couldn't remember it and she found language arts boring and easy, so pretty much everybody found language arts simple and only the jocks found it difficult.

"Ah yes, Mr. Lee, welcome to our school," the principle couldn't get off his lazy bum to get up and shake Eunhyuk's hand, so he just extended his hand over the desk for Eunhyuk to shake. 

Eunhyuk kindly took his hand and shook it. I could already tell that Eunhyuk was a nice person, he has kindness running through his veins and out his mouth and controlling his actions. 

"Let me just print you a new schedule, and thank you Jessica, Donghae, for making Eunhyuk feel welcome," Mr. SooMan smiled and stood up, walking into the printing room and geting the printing of Eunhyuk's schedule. 

"Thank you, Sir," Eunhyuk took his schedule happily and read through his classes, only to have Jessica snatch it from him and examine it herself. 

"We have classes together! First period, third period, fourth period with me, and then you have first period, second period, and sixth period with Donghae!" Jessica squealed and did a twirl. We all had the same lunch period, which was obvious.

"Okay then," Eunhyuk mumbled. We all walked put of the office together, I was following close behind, unnoticed. 

Soojong, a jock, brushed up against my arm and I squealed, running up to Jessica and clinging to the back of her shirt. Soojong laughed and walked off with his goons. 

Jessica turned and hugged me tight. Eunhyuk stared at us like we were freaks, and here I thought that he was starting to like us, well, not me of course.

Nobody likes me.            

I really hope this story doesn't because I worked so hard on and I already feel like it's going to fail :C Though I would like to thank you guys. for commenting on the story before it even started :D