Music as you read <3

Yunho

I was really bored earlier in the morning so I went out of my condominium and strolled outside. I tried calling Jaejoong to ask him about the letter again, I mean- it's worth a try even if he did throw it away. It's been years, so I'm a hundred percent sure it's gone.

Still, I want to know what he thinks about it. Jaejoong won’t answer my calls though. I bet he was still asleep when I called, and at the same time, I get the feeling that he won’t answer my calls. Maybe he didn't save my number and he thinks I'm just a stranger so he ignored my call or maybe he blocked my number. There could be tons of reasons why he didn't answer my calls.

Staring blankly at the sky, I closed my eyes and there are the thoughts of when I was with Jaejoong. In just a glimpse of an eye our friendship was ruined. I stared at my phone again; no one even cares to call me. I ended up falling asleep on a bleacher near the park.

Jaejoong-ah... At least leave me a message.

'Jae why are you avoiding me?'

'You-You really want to know? The truth is- I am rejected. I haven't even confessed yet but I know I'll get rejected. I really love this person, he's perfect for me. What I really hate about him is his numbness. How can he not know I'm in love with him?'

'H-He?'

'I'm in love with a guy, Yunho.'

'Who is it?'

'You. I'm in love with you, Yunho. But I know you'll never love me the way I love you.' 

How did we end up like this, Jae?

'Yunho, you're nothing to me anymore. Well actually, you're just a memory for me. A memory that I'm ready to throw away anytime and anywhere.'

I still can't forget you, Jae.

Upon waking up, I wasn't holding my phone anymore. I quickly sat up in panic. My wallet was not in my pocket as well. 

Thief... Someone stole it without me knowing? I thought. "Damn it, how could I not feel the thief? Stupid." Well, it was no use to search for the thief who stole my phone and wallet. The thief probably needed it, or maybe someone is just playing around with me? Jaejoong uses to play tricks on me, but I don't think he'd do that now. "Fine. Take it you unseen whoever you are thief." I sighed, "I'm such a disappointment." I said before lying back on the bleacher.

I still can't believe a thief came without even me knowing. What an expert thief! Thinking about the thief really troubled me a lot. I should just go home. I said on my mind and stood up, leaving.

'I clearly saw him.'

I heard someone uttered. I turned back again, and I saw Jaejoong staring at the bleacher I was sleeping at just a while ago. I was about to approach him when Yoochun suddenly came.

'Jaejoong-ah, maybe we should get you home. You're hallucinating.'

Jaejoong's hallucinating? Why did Jaejoong come here? Who exactly did he saw?

It can't be me, right?

I mean why not? I was the only one here as far as I'm concerned.

"W-wait," I said under my breath.

Unfortunately, none of them heard me. The two continued to get on the car and left.

As much as I'm curious, I still don't think Jaejoong or Yoochun would like it if I ruin their moment of being together on a Sunday.

"That's right Yunho. Let them be. You're just a fail suitor. Stay away." I've been talking to myself lately. Jeez, is this what love did to me?

On my way home, there was an abandoned plastic cup and I managed to bring it near my condominium by kicking it. The cup was unlucky I found it; it wouldn't get hurt if I didn't see it blocking my way back home. Seriously, should I give up on courting Jaejoong? I have a feeling this will really lead nowhere. As in nowhere. Nothing. Damn, I'm just saying those words because my heart is hurting too much, like it’s about to explode.

Brutally explode.

Should I give up?

Or should I keep on chasing Jaejoong?

Two questions on my mind, still unanswered until the moon came down. How long have I been walking? I haven't even eaten anything yet. But I shouldn't eat anything unless I have answered those questions.

Just when I was about to give up, I hear a loud sniff. I blinked as if I couldn't believe who I was seeing right in front of me. 

"W-Where have you been?" I figured Jaejoong had been crying by just hearing his blatant voice and bloated red eyes.

"J-J-Just...somewhere." I mumbled. "W-Why a-are..." I cleared my throat, taking a deep breath. I was getting too nervous all of the sudden. "Were you crying? What's wrong?"

"What's wrong? You. You're what's wrong, Yunho-ah. Damn you!" He shouted, tears sinking from his eyes. "Damn you! You made me worry to death! I thought something bad happened to you because you were nowhere to be found! Are you crazy?! Did you really want me to call the police first before you show up?! Did you really want me to instantly go crazy waiting for you?!" He ran towards me and punched my chest lightly. I was tongue-tied. "I hate you! I hate you!" Jaejoong continued crying, "Where have you been you idiot?! Talk to me! Did someone cut your tongue?! What exactly happened to you?! Ya Jung Yunho... Are you hurt somewhere?" Slowly, he sounded bland.

I brushed his tears away, "I'm hurt, but it doesn't matter. Jaejoong-ah, don't cry. I don't think you should cry because of me."

"Idiot." He muttered. "I went all the way to the hospital thinking that you were dead. Who wouldn't cry?" It was as if, Jaejoong and I were back to the times when we were still best friends. It was as if he had forgotten how much resentment he has on me. "Tell me, where are you hurt?" If only I could turn back time back in high school. I could have told him face-to-face, how I truly felt about him. My heart hurt so crudely, I didn't tell him. Instead, I squeezed his slim body into my arms.

"Let go of him!" Yoochun grabbed my arm harshly, seizing Jaejoong behind him.

"Yoochun-ah!" Jaejoong's eyes widened in surprise.

"You've already found him, Jae. So now I'll bring you home. And you-" Yoochun looked at me, "Don't touch him. Don't talk to Jaejoong. Because of you he cried. You don't deserve him. Jaejoong doesn't need someone who will only make him cry! Get lost." Yoochun rapidly dragged Jaejoong with him, and brought him inside his car. I didn't do anything; I was too bothered and stupefied.

I clutched my chest, the place where my heart should be and where Jae punched me lightly. I breathe out heavily. "He came looking for me," I was glad.

That night, I couldn't really sleep. Jaejoong was always on my mind; as if it was the first time I had an ultimate crush on someone. I was smiling again. I even thought about calling him late at night, but... I don't have a phone anymore. Too bad, I feel poor now. I chuckled. I was hoping to see him tomorrow and snatch him from whoever he's with to have an alone time with him, but the basketball team will have to go somewhere tomorrow and will be gone for three days and two nights for practice and basketball tournament.

Yoochun will be there.

Siwon will be there.

I will be there, though I'm still new in the team.

Jaejoong won’t be there.

Monday came, the no.1 day that most students hate. I was feeling too lazy to go to school but I didn't want to get kicked out either. Last night was a surprise. I'll just keep that, and say that it's a 'yes' I shouldn't give up on Jaejoong.

"You're coming?" Siwon and Jaejoong were talking in the gym. I just came in to pick up Siwon. The rest were already gone so...

"Wait for Yunho. Yunho and you should go together. I still have some things fix."  Siwon told Jaejoong.

"Yunho? No way. Why him?"

"What's happening here?" I walked towards them, and it looks like Jaejoong feels awkward.

"Well, this small guy, the one you loves," Siwon teased with a laugh. "He said he wants to come."

"Correction, I have to come. Yoochun said he forgot his toothbrush and he asked me to bring it for him. But since he already went..." Jaejoong said. "Anyway, Yoochun told me to come."

Siwon just smiled and gave me a this-is-an-opportunity-look on his face. "Yunho use my car, take Jaejoong with you." He gave me a map. "Take this map since we're going too far away." He squinted an eye.

"I...I don't drive cars." I said uprightly. "We can use my bike." 

"Let Jaejoong drive then and you tell him which direction. Man, I want to try your bike okay? Now you two go ahead. I'll follow after fixing what should be fixed." With the last instruction, Siwon left me with Jaejoong in an awkward silence.

I slowly looked at Jaejoong.

"W-What are you looking at? I don't really intend on following you!" He shook his head promptly. "It's all for Yoochun's toothbrush!"