Donghae's P.O.V. 


Damage is yet to be done 


Every time the memory of Siwon holding Stella’s hand flashes in my head, I get this achy feeling in my stomach. It's like my insides drop down to my gut. My heart was already crushed by the break-up and now it's pulverized because by what I just saw.

I wonder if Siwon did it intentionally. Did he want me to see him with Stella? Or did he do it not knowing that I was there? Maybe he did. Maybe he had really moved on and didn't care anymore...

The next day we had a dance practice for our song, From U. All were present except for Kangin-hyung and Siwon since they are busy with their own schedules. I learned the dance easily even though it was a bit complicated. I know I did way better today than I did last time. So I guess I regained my groove back. 

For our break, we took out our own lunch boxes and ate our meals in the practice room. We sat on the floor and chatted while we shared our food to each other. I missed times like this. Just us guys, doing what we do best and having fun at the same time. It almost felt like as if nothing happened.

Suddenly... "So what happened at your night-out with the girls?" Shindong-hyung asked Kyuhyun and Yesung-hyung.

"Oh, we had a lot of fun! Everybody got wasted and of course, crazy stuffs happened", Kyuhyun said while bits of food came flying from his mouth. He exchanged a knowing look with Yesung-hyung and they both laughed. 

"Yeah? What crazy stuffs did you do, Kyuhyun?" Sungmin asked.

"Well... I kissed Seohyun", Kyuhyun grinned.

 "Good job, kid!" Leeteuk-hyung shook his shoulders and Shindong-hyung gave him a high-five. 

"And Siwon...", Kyuhyun continued. I gasped when I heard his name. I stopped chewing my food for a second. I kept my head down and listened carefully.

"Siwon kissed Stella on the lips! They were all over each other last! Stella’s head was on Wonnie’s shoulder all night! And---" 

"Kyuhyunnie!" Teuk-hyung cut him short. I looked up and saw him cocking his head towards my direction.

"Donghae doesn't need to hear, Kyuhyun", said Eunhyuk. 

Yes, it hurts... It hurts so much. It's only been three days and he already found a replacement for me... If only I could take out that story from my memory I really would. I want to break down... I want to cry... But I won't. I don't want to burden them witnessing all my drama. 

I managed to fake a smile and said, "What are you saying, Hyuk? It's fine. Siwon and I are over, so it's just normal for him to find another person to kiss and cuddle with". Then there was an awkward silence. Most of them went back to eating and acted like I just said the world's biggest lie. Hyukkie was testing me with his eyes waiting for me to give up. But I won't, Hyuk. Not this time. Not anymore... I gave Teukkie-hyung an exaggerated smile and looked down. I bit my lip and stared at my food. Hold on, Donghae... Practice is almost over. Let your tears go when no one's looking. 

The practice was finally came to an end. I grabbed my bag quickly and carried it over my shoulder. I said goodbye to them and rushed to the parking lot. I didn't even bother taking a shower anymore. I just couldn’t wait to be alone. 

I reached the parking lot and nearly ran to my car. I threw my stuffs in back and when I turned around, Teukkie-hyung and Hyuk stood behind me. 

"Donghae-ah, are you alright?" Hyung asked. I pursed my lips then nodded. "Fishy, we all know you're not... So if you're hurt and need somebody to cry on, we're here for you, man". I put my hand on my temples. Oh, no. It's coming... 

"You don't need to take this alone, Hae. You'll be needing your friends if you want to move on", Hyung said. For a second I saw my father in him. His eyes soft and sad.

"But I don't want to move on, Hyung... Not yet." I cried out. And the next thing I knew, I was already sobbing. I tried to stop but I couldn’t control it. I’ve been holding them for too long...

"But you have to, Hae... because Siwon already did. And there's nothing else to do now, but to face that fact", Hyuk said and gently held my arm. 

He came close to hug me. I hugged him back and cried harder on his shoulder. "That's it, Hae. Just let it out..." Teuk rubbed my back. I gave long hard sobs and cried all the pain. 

"Okay, maybe not too much, Fishy. This shirt is new". I looked at Hyukkie then he flashed me his toothy grin. Hyung laughed and I giggled.

"I'm just kidding, Hae. You can soak my shirts with your tears any time", Hyuk said while patting my head. 

Then out of nowhere, a silver Chrysler was headed straight at us. It made a swift move then parked next to us. The door opened then an upset Siwon came out. "Hyung", he said then gave Teuk-hyung a nod. 

He scowled at Hyukkie then to me. I didn’t want him to see me crying so I looked away.

He turned his back and we watched him as he walked away. Walk away from me and my life. I would've stopped him if this happened three days ago. But Teukkie-hyung and Hyukkie’s right. He's in good hands now and I should just accept it. 

Goodbye, Siwon... Goodbye to our hopeless love.