“_________-ah.”

I was running and looking frantically from side to side, hoping to have escaped fast enough and avoid getting caught. It was risky trying to tangle with the press conference, especially since I’d just been accepted into the enterprise, but I reminded myself whom it was for as motivation. The familiar voice behind me suddenly jolted me from my escapade, and my heart pounded, realizing that I wasn’t quick enough. Their voices were breathless, Jaejoong’s arm firmly on Jonghyun’s, and Jonghyun’s eyes meeting mine. I stared at them, thinking that I looked quite deranged and suspicious sneaking out of the electrical room, especially donned in the sky blue blazer and skirt uniform of the Kim Medical line. Racking my brain for an excuse, and tapping my shiny black flats nervously on the carpeted ground, the fragile silence was broken sharply by Jaejoong’s angry, terse tone.

“________. What are you doing?”

My eyes widened as Jonghyun broke into a huge grin, an utter contrast of Jaejoong’s demeanour. “_______-ah!”

“Surprise?” I said, giving a sheepish laugh.

“It was you who turned off the light, wasn’t it?” Jaejoong’s voice, emotionless and frosty, like that winter when we first met.

“Well, not really-”

“Geojitmal. You did, didn’t you?”

“Well, I couldn’t just leave you there, could I? What type of a father was that? What the hell! How could he just-oh, he makes me so angry! How can he tell you to be in charge of Jonghyun’s sickness? He never accepted either you or Jonghyun as his sons, and now he’s using you guys for his benefit and throwing you to the sharks along the way? God, what a jerk! That son of a-”

My hands clasped to my mouth as I let the cat out of the bag.

“Well, I don’t mind having you here, even if a certain over here is too old to appreciate guests. Since I’m apparently this Kim guy’s son now, I’ll let you have free access to visit me anytime you wish, and I’ll even create permanent accommodations for you.” Though Jonghyun had a big smile plastered on his voice, his falsely chirpy tone had hints of annoyance and anger in it, too. It was as if he was silently reprimanding me-I couldn’t do anything properly in front of them or behind them.

“Jonghyun-ah. It’s okay, really. I’m just working for President Kim-”

“You’re working with that ? ______, you know better!”

“Jonghyun, I’m not a little girl anymore, I can-”

Jaejoong’s eyes, which had turned an angry dark colour, were directed right at me. Goosebumps pricked at my arm, and suddenly, there was this frightened, churning feeling in my stomach. He walked in great strides towards me, and grabbed my arm, walking down the hallway with me in tow. Jonghyun looked surprised but didn’t react, standing there in the middle of hallway while I looked at him desperately. There was a mix of pain and worry in his expression, but he decided that leaving us alone was the best. Ignoring my cries, which were loud and shrill, Jaejoong flung me roughly into an empty meeting room, where not even Jonghyun could find us.

“Explain. Now.”

“There’s nothing to explain, Jaejoong. Are you trying to make it hard for me?”

“_________. . Do you know how worried I was about you? Can you please just stay still for one moment? Do you really need me to chase after you for every waking moment that I’m alive?”

“It’s just you that’s being overprotective,” I retorted defensively. “I didn’t ask for a bodyguard.”

“Are you arguing with me? Seriously?  Do you know how it feels, to always have someone on their mind? , ______, I’m always thinking about one thing, and that’s you! Do you know how important you are to me? It’s like you don’t even know how much you affect me, because you keep running off into dangerous situations, like this! I’m always asking myself if she’s safe, if she’s doing alright, how she’ll react when she finds out all the crap were in, if she’s still in love with me. Because of you, I’ve become into this! I can’t even think properly anymore without my mind conjuring an image of your face. It’s insane, and it doesn’t help when you dress…like this!”

I was shocked by his outburst. “What?”

He looks at me seriously, brushing a loose strand of hair away from my face.

“_________, I’m in love with you. But if you love me too, you’ve got to stop doing this kind of thing for others. If you truly love me, you’re going to have to let go and protect yourself first. You can’t always think about other people or for them, because they can take care of themselves. Whenever Jonghyun’s in trouble, you can’t just instantly book a plane ticket and hitch yourself over to America for him. You can’t respond to his every whim and need. I’m already trying my best to handle everything, and save him, but I can’t handle both that and you. Please, ______. Can you do it for me? ”

My heart thumped angrily in my chest, but this time, it wasn’t because of Jaejoong’s touch-it was because of his words.

“Jaejoong…what-what are you saying?”

“It’s time now, _______.”

His eyes looked sad but hungry towards my answer. I suddenly felt clammy and sweaty, and could see the two doors, loud and clear as daylight, in front of me. If I chose one, I would lose another-and I wanted to grab on to both of them. I wanted to hold on to them forever, because I knew the time we’d had together was devastatingly short. However, before I could even try making up an excuse to his question, he didn’t beat around the bush. He instantly brought up the question that I’d been dreading ever since I’d met him.

“If you could only choose me or Jonghyun, who would you choose?”