It’s almost 11PM and I couldn’t find myself to sleep that night, probably thinking about that freaking pleasure-giving moment that happened to me later. I cursed myself for liking Myungsoo that way and at this time. These complicated feelings like this have no place at this moment. We’re on war and I feel like I’m giving myself my own kind of war. I found myself sitting at the bench, I thought of it as a bench, even it just consists chunks of wood, at the tent’s entrance drawing incomprehensive circles in the sand-filled ground with my foot. Suddenly, I felt like the hollow place beside me was replaced by warmth of a person’s body. I didn’t care to move to look who that was as I was busy summoning my thoughts properly.

“Can’t sleep?” the person’s voice whispered in the air.

I jerked my head to the side only to find the person that I was thinking about seconds ago. “M-Myungsoo?”

He smiled and then I turned back to look again on the ground. “Yes, I can’t,” I answered him.

“Would you mind?” Myungsoo asked me as I violently shook my head so he took it as a ‘no’.  He moved beside me, closer at this time.

“So…” Myungsoo started.

“Hmm?”

“I was wondering what brought you here. Like, women like you should not be here in war, I suppose”.

I sneered. “Do men have only the right to involve themselves in war? Everyone’s involved here anyways so why or gender would even matter?”

“Sorry if I have offended you. I was just…kind of…worrying though”. Myungsoo rubbed the back of his neck. Feeling ashamed of what he had said earlier. He was only new here and he could manage himself to tell me things like that. Women-in-home is not the in-thing anymore. All should be working their off to make this country proud and progressive. I believe that God has given us these capabilities and talents so that we could use it, not to hide in the closet. And now he’s saying that I should not be here just because he was just worrying. Huh? Worrying? He’s worrying?

“Wait, what?” I voiced out my thoughts.

Myungsoo was caught off-guard of my sudden asking. He bit his lips preparing himself for a proper answer.

I chuckled. “Come on. You don’t need to answer”. He averted his gaze looking a little flustered. I continued chuckling and that made the awkwardness around the two of us melt away. We have talked about whatever that comes into our mind, from his profession to my profession and even a little from our personal lives. I have learned that idols are still human too. They were just made to appear perfect but inside, they still have imperfections that made them live and breathe like a normal person. We haven’t talked much about our love lives since he has been avoiding that question ever since I started asking him using my journalistic skills.

“No seriously… have you fallen in love before?”

“You’re amazing”.

I pouted. He keeps on shying away from the question and only answers me with his smile. It’s as if he sees me as a journalist and all and it kinda pisses me off.

“Okay fine. I won’t ask you again. Good night”.

I stood up pretending that sleep has finally hit me. Just at the moment that he would stop me from going away from him, the tent at the other side blasted. My ears started ringing from that indescribable bang and my body felt the familiar numbness. Gunshots were raining our area like storm. And there I was unsure of what the hell has just happened. Myungsoo’s arms are over me, bringing me to the safest place he could as other members ducked and covered and fought against the perpetrators. I can see them exchange gunshots with each other. I can see them being in trouble. And I can see the worried Sunggyu, cursing every now. Then, a member’s body was now laid in Sunggyu’s muscular arms.

A/N: Who’s that in Sunggyu’s arms? Omo!