“Hyung? Have you ever... kissed anyone before?”

Daehyun immediately halts his very important search for The Funniest Cat Video Ever and swivels around in his desk chair to look at Jongup. He's been sprawled out on Daehyun's bed for the better part of an hour by now, staring at the ceiling, but this is the first time he speaks, and it's to say something as ridiculous as that. Daehyun is stumped. “What did you just say?”

Jongup's cheeks turn scarlet, and he clears his throat awkwardly. “Nevermind,” he mumbles. “Just... f-forget I said anything.”

Even if Daehyun wanted to be a nice guy (for once) and do Jongup a solid by forgetting about this, he doesn't think he'd be able to actually do so. Jongup rarely talks about stuff like this, and when he does, he sure as hell doesn't bring it up first. This time he did, though. Daehyun isn't about to let that slide. “Did you just ask me if I kissed someone?” he inquires, partially to confirm that that was really what he heard, partially to watch Jongup squirm.

“Maybe,” Jongup says. He's obviously trying to act nonchalant.

The thing is, he's not a very good actor, and Daehyun can see right through him. This time he graciously lets it go. “Why?” he asks instead. Jongup shrugs. He seems even less sure of himself now, and he keeps his eyes pointedly fixed on the ceiling rather than looking at Daehyun. It's kind of cute how flustered he is. “Does this have anything to do with the date you went on yesterday?”

Jongup's blush darkens. “Maybe,” he says again, sheepishly.

Daehyun jumps at the quasi-confession like a hungry shark smelling blood in the water. He scoots across the floor on his chair until he's close enough to poke Jongup in the stomach. “Moon Jongup, did you kiss the girl?” he grins. Groaning, Jongup covers his face, but as always Daehyun is a stubborn little er. He pokes Jongup again, burrowing a boney finger in between Jongup's ribs this time. “Well? Did you?”

“For the record, she kissed me,” Jongup relents from behind the fragile barrier of his hands.

“Oh,” Daehyun drawls. “An active woman. Nice.” Jongup says nothing. Daehyun's grin fades. “You know, for someone who just had their first kiss you don't seem very happy. This is exciting stuff!”

“Is it?” Jongup mutters. “It doesn't feel very exciting.”

Now Daehyun frowns. “Okay, why are you being all mopey? Was she that bad of a kisser?”

“I don't exactly have anything to compare it to,” Jongup says with a meek chuckle. “I don't think she was bad, though? I don't know. It was okay, I guess.”

“So what's the matter?” Jongup just shakes his head. He's still covering his face so Daehyun climbs onto the bed, grabs Jongup's hands and pulls them away so he can look at him properly. “Come on, tell your favorite hyung what's up.”

“It just felt... weird,” Jongup admits. “Like... it felt like it wasn't right. I didn't like it very much.”

This is were Daehyun would usually make a joke or interject a snide remark, his specialty, but Jongup looks so despondent and confused that he refrains from doing that and just pats him on the thigh instead. Good Guy Jung Daehyun. “Maybe she just wasn't the right girl for you.”

“Or maybe...” Jongup begins, then trails off and falls silent until Daehyun prompts him to continue. Jongup swallows something and says, carefully: “Maybe... it's because she's a girl.” It takes a moment for the implication to hit Daehyun, but when it does, his jaw drops. Well. That would certainly explain... things. Jongup shrugs, chuckling weakly. “I don't know, though. I'm probably just being weird.” He's looking up at Daehyun as though he's afraid Daehyun might punch him.

“So...” Daehyun can't remember the last time he didn't know what to say. He always knows what to say, he's never speechless, but right now it's taking a startling amount of time for him to gather his wits. “What you're saying is... you'd... you'd rather kiss boys?”

Jongup bites his lip. “I think so?”

This is weird. This is really ing weird. Never in his life did Daehyun expect to have this conversation with Jongup... hell, he never expected to have this conversation with anyone. He's really ing far out of his comfort zone, so he does the one thing he is comfortable with: he laughs and jokes about it. “Well, I'd offer to kiss you, but–”

“Would you do that?” Jongup cuts him off before he can even finish the sentence. Clearly, he did not pick up on the fact that this was supposed to be a joke, and he sounds so eager and hopeful and almost desperate, which is what makes Daehyun actually consider it for real. There are warning bells going off in his head and a small voice screaming at him that this is a Very Bad Idea. The person asking for this is cute, innocent Jongup, who probably doesn't even know what he's talking about. He's Daehyun's friend and this could put some serious strain on their friendship... not to mention the fact that Daehyun has had an unrequited secret crush on Jongup for like a year and a half. Daehyun is a lot of things, but he is not a masochist.

And yet he finds himself saying: “Sure. I'll help you out.” ing great.

Immediately, Jongup sits up and scoots backwards to lean against the headboard, and Daehyun takes a deep breath before moving closer, kneeling on the mattress. This is still really ing weird. In all the times Daehyun has thought of himself in bed with Jongup, he never imagined this. He never imagined kissing Jongup for experimentation's sake, and he certainly never imagined Jongup looking so terrified. “Have you ever kissed a guy before?” he asks quietly.

Daehyun's mouth quirks. He doesn't know which response will appease Jongup, a lie or the truth. So he goes for the latter: “Yeah. I have.”

“Oh.” Jongup seems surprised by this. “I didn't know that.”

“There are a lot of things you don't know about me,” Daehyun says with a shrug. Like the fact that you're kind of making my dreams come true right now. “Don't worry. I've kissed guys before.”

“Guys?” Jongup echoes, emphasis on the pluralization.

“Yes,” Daehyun says. “Guys.”

“Oh.” Jongup nods, apparently more at ease with the situation, if only slightly. Looks like Daehyun made the right choice. “So this is no big deal for you, huh?”

“I don't know about that,” Daehyun mutters. He takes Jongup's hand in his, threading their fingers together like he's totally okay (in reality, he's kind of freaking out). “I mean, it's not every day I get to kiss someone as cute as you.” it. Might as well go all in.

“Now you're just being silly,” Jongup laughs, but there's light pink dusting his cheek bones. “So... how are we going to do this?” Pensive, Daehyun brushes his thumb over Jongup's knuckles. It's not like he's some expert on making out or anything, but right now Jongup is looking at him like he believes he is, which is why Daehyun should probably take the lead. He lets out an inaudible sigh as he mentally repeats what seems to have become his new motto in life recently: it. And then he just... goes for it. Without further ado, he leans forward and he kisses Jongup.

It's not the best kiss Daehyun has ever had, far from it. Jongup just kind of sits there stiffly, like he has no idea what he's supposed to do, while Daehyun works their lips together. It's awkward. And still, for some reason, Daehyun enjoys it more than he's ever enjoyed kissing before. It probably has something to do with the soft heat coursing through him, like sparks of electricity in his veins.

Daehyun soon pulls away. It was never supposed to be a very long kiss, after all. He gives Jongup some time to process what just happened, and while he does so, he takes in the features of Jongup's face: the bow of his lips, the sharp curve of his jaw, the cute mole on the bridge of his nose. He's so attractive. It's kind of unfair. “Well?” Daehyun says once Jongup starts looking more accepting of the situation and less like he's about ready to get up and flee the room. He watches as Jongup's throat bobs.

“Can we do that again?” Jongup blurts out, and he scrambles for an excuse when Daehyun raises his eyebrows in surprise. “It's just... you know... I-I didn't know that... that you were going to do it so I wasn't... I wasn't ready. You know?”

“Alright,” Daehyun relents with a smile, even though this is ing torture for him. “Then... I'm going to kiss you now, if that's okay.” He waits for Jongup to nod before closing the space between them once more.

This time, the kiss is better. This time, to his credit, Jongup does seem prepared, and he actually kisses back, one tentative hand coming up to rest on Daehyun's shoulder as if Jongup doesn't quite know what to do with it. This time, it's so much harder for Daehyun to pull away, but he forces himself to do so. It's not supposed to be a makeout session. It's not supposed to be a makeout session. Jongup's tongue runs over his lips. He exhales shakily. “Okay.”

“Okay?” Daehyun repeats, slightly teasing even though his heart is racing.

Jongup is staring at Daehyun's mouth. “Can we do that again, but, like, more? I don't know, I just don't feel like I've had quite enough to form an impression yet.”

“Really?” Daehyun says. His voice is embarrassingly wobbly. “Or are you just saying that because you want to kiss me.” It's supposed to be a joke. He's making a joke. And yet...

“Yeah,” Jongup says earnestly. “You're right.”

“What?”

“You got me,” Jongup admits with a sheepish grin. “I'm only making excuses because I've been wanting you to kiss me all along.”

Daehyun feels a little faint. “You lied to me?”

Jongup grimaces. “Sorry about that.”

“Did you even kiss the girl?”

“Oh yeah, we did actually kiss,” Jongup says. “The problem is that... I was thinking about you the entire time.” Jongup is blushing. Daehyun can't believe this is happening. This is the kind of thing he has only been able to dream of, yet here he is now, with Jongup's hand in his, and it's very much real. The corners of Jongup's lips droop with worry. “Is it okay? Please say something.”

Daehyun stares at him and doesn't say anything. He just leans in to kiss Jongup again. It's more than okay.

~*~

A/N: it's jongup's birthday so I wrote a thing. just because.
happy birthday, kiddo. ♥
(also posted here)