“Missing Someone Isn’t About How Long It Has Been Since You’ve Seen Them Or The Amount Of Time Since You’ve Talked. It’s About That Very Moment When You Find Yourself Doing Something And Wishing They Were Right There Beside Your Side”

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The crisps white snow covering the trees and street. The way snow was sprinkled down from a grey clouded sky and floated to the ground with grace and elegance, so pure and yet so melancholic at the same time. Ji Eun was watching the falling snow from her window, cuddling up with her old warm sweater and a mug of hot coffee on her hand. The temperature today was 3degree Celsius better than the last few days, but it didn’t change the fact she felt colder day by day. Joon Gi did exactly like how he promised her; he contacted her at least once a day, either by messages or by phone calls. He never imposed her about her decision or even asked her about anything regarding their last conversation. Between his busy schedule he tried his best in reminding her for meal and sleep, he knew how she could be someone that bad in taking care herself especially when there was so much going on in her life. It’s funny how they talked day by day like the whole incident never happened and how that made her miss him even more.

“How long has it been?” Ji Eun muttered, she put her untouched coffee on her coffee table and curled on the sofa. She sighed softly and closed her eyes, “It hasn’t past 3 days since we last saw each other and an hour ago he called me as usual. Why it felt like much longer than that?”

There was an ache that comes and goes, always returning in her quiet moments; and she had too many of them. Time passed too slow and painful for her taste, she knew she had to make her decision soon or later, she knew that the longer she took her time the harder it would be for her to decide.

Her phone rang; alerting her that there was a new message came. She took it and checked.

‘I have ordered some food to be delivered to you, please eat? I am being nosy am I? But I worried that even though you said you will eat, in the end you would still curled in your bed or something and didn’t order any or even asked Hanteo or Jjung to send you some food. Eat a lot please? I love you Ji.’

Ji Eun grinned with a sad eyes, “He knows me...  too well.“

She then stood up, walked to the window and sighed once more. She put her forehead softly on the glass. Feeling the surge coldness transferred from it to her. Her warm breath created small droplets of vapor on the surface and she softly traced it; writing “Joon” on it and circling it with a heart. She then put her hand over the ephemeral drawing, cupping it as if it was possible to stop it from disappearing.

Her melancholy mood hung over her like a black cloud, raining her personal sorrow down on her wherever she was, leaving her listless and empty.

A ring on her apartment door pulled her back to reality; the delivery has arrived. She accepted it and put it on her table with less to no appetite. He had ordered her favorite food for her. But lately every food taste like cardboard, was dryer than a sandbox in the summer; making her felt bad on how much food had gone wasted. She took a few bites and gave up, nothing taste good in her tongue not even her favorite food.

“Is there no other way to survive? To protect him from Ki Ha?” She mumbled while laying down her head on the table.

Everything felt so much worse than her break up with Ki Ha, the pain and the devastation. She couldn’t help laughing at the supportive comments left on her SNS by her fans about her break up. She wasn’t laughing at her fans supports, she was laughing on the fact she did need support but not for her break up with Ki Ha; it was for a different guy, a different situation where neither of them wanted to end what have just started,  but the situation put her cornered in the options; neither  offered her a happier or easier path to walk on.

“I miss you oppa…”

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“Joon Gi oppa!” she blurted as she woke. She found herself alone and cold on her bed; shivering while rememberi