Pairing | DaraHae

Requested by tartar

“Goodbye.”

That was the last word she ever spoke to me.

“Don't go, Dara.”

It still stung as if it was a fresh wound, but a month had already passed. How could it not sting the way it does? I had loved her wholeheartedly, tenderly but also passionately. Why did you have to leave me? How could you end it with one word? Sandara Park, you're so cruel.

–

        I was all by myself again in my room. I was sober, but it felt like waves were crashing against me and my head was spinning. Who was I before I met you? I've never felt so alone my whole life until you left me. I'm surrounded by my members, my family, my fans, but I still long for you. I look at our picture that is still displayed in the frame you gave me for our 1^st year anniversary, memories flash back in my head. We were both genuinely happy and in love. Where did I go wrong? Didn't I successfully protect you and cherish you? We made a promise we wouldn't let go of each other.

–

        It's the 5^th time this month that I sit and wait outside your apartment, hiding in my car. I know you know it's me in here, but you casually ignore me. Why is it that every time I come here.. other guys are coming to pick you up or drop you off? That fresh, rookie Song Minho especially. Are you doing this on purpose? Breaking my heart more so that I will let go of you? It hurts, it aches, but I can't. I love you more than anything, anyone in this world. You should know that. I start my car and drive off as soon as I see him embrace you.

–

        I mope in my room once more as I recall our first date. Every memory of our dates then followed. Tears start to form in my eyes and I let them fall as I lie down, with my arms covering my eyes. Suddenly, my phone starts to vibrate. I hesitantly look at the screen and see your name pop up. I answered it quickly.

“Let's talk.”

I hurriedly sat up. Was this a chance for reconciliation?

–

        My hopes for reconciliation were crushed upon the meeting. I drove over to her house, not caring if I got caught. She opened the door cautiously, looking so stressed.

“Donghae,” she began.

But before she could continue, I pulled her into an embrace. I know I must have looked pathetic but I would throw everything away for her. We were already inside her apartment. The place looked empty and I picked up an eerie vibe. She sat at the couch with me following her.

“Please stop,” her voice was inaudible

“Dara, please. Not again,” I was shaking

“I came here to plead you to stop. It's so hard,” she told me

“Why would you do that? I feel like we're breaking up all over again,” I knew tears were forming in my eyes again

“Just stop it. Stop showing up. Stop showing me you love me. Stop being you!” she exclaimed

But you called me to talk. You told me to come here.

“How do I do that? I can't do that, Dara,” I held

“You're making it so hard,” she started to cry and my tears came down as well.

Things are hard for me too, I wanted to say. You broke my heart into millions of pieces. Why are you crying?

“You broke up with me, Dara,”

“I know,”

“Then why are you having a hard time?” I finally found the courage to ask

“Because you are so nice. Too nice for your own sake. Have some hate for me, would you?!”

“I will not give you the satisfaction of being free of guilt!” I exploded

She froze with her brown orbs staring at me.

“You shattered my whole being, Dara. I would have given you anything if you asked me to. And you know what is ridiculous? I would still do that. But you broke up with me... And for what? Because of doubts? Insecurities? To hell with them! I loved you. I love you. Was that never enough?! Dammit!” I stood up.

It was my first time ever yelling at Dara out of anger. Never in our relationship did I raise my voice at her because she was so fragile, I was afraid she'd break. But she broke me....  

Author's Note

My first time doing Angst!DaraHae. It feels so weird and off. Pwuahaha. :) I hope it is okay though~ :P