A big hole.

This is how I can summarise the paper hanged on the wall: the result of having been focused on my target for already an hour. This hole in this sheet obsesses me, because I believe my soul is the same… since I kissed Soo Hyeon. Whether I continue to train myself with guns or not, she is permanently in my mind.

I have used all the munitions I have brought with me. It is enough. I am ready.

I have to take a shower before taking work. It is not the greatest wash-room I have in my apartment but the shower of this disaffected boat where we train ourselves in secret. Whatever, I don’t care. And moreover I am used to. I proceed to take off my clothes, wet by my sweat and go under the shower of this gloomy place, the cold water on my body, cold, very cold, and my pain…

… It was nothing, just a kiss.

But since this day, I haven’t really talked with Soo Hyeon. It has been a week. This cold water on my skin seems more peaceful and releases my heartache.

It is enough, I want to go on.

I turn off the shower and proceed to dry my skin. Sometimes, I believe I am not the only one in this boat. It is awkward; some people could be frightened by this gloomy boat and its noisy pipes with rats inside. I am sure I will be able to manage whoever human would dare enter in my hidden place.

I am now dressed and get out. The light of the sky blinds me and the warm breeze my face. It is pleasurable.

With this mind, I drive to the hospital, ready to take work.

In the locker room, I put my blouse and meet my colleague, anaesthetist. like me. She is an interesting woman, with a strong mind and she seems know a lot about life. She is beautiful with measurements made to be loved. I think that is how men could think!

I remember my shame when I got aroused by that unknown pretty woman in the park with her supposed boyfriend. What happened at the park doesn’t scare me as much. I know why I was trouble now: I kissed Soo Hyeon so does it means that I like women? I have never questioned me about that. What I know is that: if the scene with Soo Hyeon has to be rehearsed, I will do the same.

My colleague reminds me Soo Hyeon. Not bec