THIRTY NINE

The next few days were depressing. Seohyun worked too much harder than she did most of her life. After her usual schedules, she would research for next articles she could write for the fashion magazines and did extensive readings on some business journals she found online. Most nights, she would drop by the gym and worked out until she could almost pass out. It helped her sleep faster and deeper.

To say that she didn’t have much time to think about the negativities was somewhat pathetic but it worked.

Somehow.

But the most pathetic thing of all was that she maintained their communication although she never initiated the calls. And as days passed by, she was getting more anxious that he was set to return soon. She would have been excited; instead she felt the dread of seeing him face-to-face.

Then she remembered everything he had done to show her how much he loves her. It could never compare to how much she showed her love to him. And now, this. She knew she could break his heart easily.

Seohyun willed herself not to fall apart. She managed to be calm and contained for the past days after his mother’s visit and the realizations that swept in her.

She managed.

Her phone beeped and sighed thanking that her Hyoyeon Unnie was on her way to her house. At least she had another distraction to set her mind into. Her sister came just the night before but she went straight to the hotel to rest. Seohyun tried to cook a few dishes too, making sure she followed every step on the recipe book. A few minutes ago, the restaurant delivered her orders and smiled at her failed confidence—just in case her food wouldn’t be edible.

At last, Hyoyeon arrived and she rushed to meet her at the door. However, her excitement was simply replaced by uneasiness when she saw who was standing behind her unnie.

“Hey, kiddo!” Hyoyeon wrapped her in her arms and smiled widely when she pulled away to give way to Minho, “Look who I found outside!”

“Hi…” Minho smiled at Seohyun who still looked perplexed, “I’m sorry to barge in like this. I was going to call you but I saw Noona…”

“Ahhh yeah,” she managed to reply and moved aside to let them both in, “It’s okay, come in you both. I hope you’re hungry.”

“I’m famished,” Hyoyeon mumbled as she walked ahead followed by Minho and Seohyun.

She decided that nothing good was really happening to her. If Minho came to talk to her she wouldn’t really invite him in her house. If it was only her unnie, her day would have been a lot better.

When it rains, it pours and she did expect some more.

If it was not for Hyoyeon, the atmosphere would have been very bleak. Her unnie dominated the conversation and despite feeling the awkwardness between her and Minho, she managed to include them both on whatever she was saying. After all, Hyoyeon was around when they were dating and her Unnie really liked Minho for her.

“Anyway, so while we were making the last line up—” Hyoyeon’s phone rang and lifted a finger at them to listen to the other line, “Ahhh really? All right, I got it.”

Seohyun went on eating slowly listening inconspicuously at her Unnie but she was already having a bad feeling. Minho remained quiet and not even once mentioned why he wanted to talk to her. She knew that he was only looking for the perfect timing and eavesdropping at her Unnie made her realize that he was going to have his chance.

Finally, Hyoyeon ended the call and stood, “Shoot, I need to go back to the office. The clients came back and they wanted me there.”

“Uh, okay Unnie…” Seohyun stood and walked her Unnie to the door.

“I will return as soon as I’m done. You two talk first.”

“Okay…”

“Maybe I can bring beer or something,” she mumbled to herself as she checked her handbag. “See you later, kids!”

Seohyun sighed, she hated the fact that her instincts had to serve her well that way. As she turned to go back to the kitchen, she almost gasped when she bumped into Minho who stealthily managed to stand behind her like a shadow.

“I’m sorry,” he steadied her holding on to her arms but Seohyun took a step back ignoring him completely.

“It’s okay. Unnie will be back soon, I guess,” she tried to smile without looking directly at him. Seohyun took another step but his hand settled on her wrist stopping her completely so she turned to accept his challenge. Then she commanded coldly, “Let me go.”

“Let’s talk,” Minho said, his grip tightened around her wrist.

She looked at their hands then lifted her chin up, “You’ve said what you wanted to say. We don’t have anything to say to each other, Oppa.”

“I want a chance, Joohyun.”

Her head tilted to the side as if she could not understand what he just said. Her brows furrowed when she tried to pull away but he held her tighter to the point of pain so she spoke wryly, “I don’t think I understand what you want from me.”

“You are in a relationship right now and I perfectly understand that,” Minho ignored her indifference but released her hand, “But the one you chose will never make you happy.”

She crossed her arms on her chest and sneered, “So now you’re an authority to my happiness?”

“Think about it, he’s at the peak of his career and promising you that one day you and him would be able to go out and tell the world about your relationship. Have you ever taken a moment to think when that can happen? Two? Three? Five years? Ten years, maybe?”

It hit her. She was with this guy for quite awhile and she knew that if he was being an right now, Minho only wanted to see her happy. But she shook her head hating the sympathy she was actually feeling, “Stop it, Oppa.”

“Listen to me and listen to yourself. When, Joohyun? When exactly? Maybe if you manage to convince yourself with a good answer to that, maybe I’d back away.” He ran his hand through his hair watching how her jaws clenched and that bitter intensity in her gaze. His voice softened, he wanted to touch her so much, to ease the pain he was causing, “I want to see you happy. Damn, I can make you fall in love with me again and I will make you happy, the way your boyfriend could never make you.”

Seohyun looked at him for the longest time. Her heart throbbed so obviously loud that she was so sure that he could hear it. Her body was quivering with angry realization of the truth. was parched, stinging liquid hurt her eyes. Her emotions had been fragile for the past days and whatever truth Minho just made her see was leaving that dent inside her. She shut her eyes tight like it could stop the pain from rushing through her, “Leave.”

“Hyunnie—”

“I said, leave!” Seohyun was never a violent person but her body just moved on its own as she pushed Minho towards the door. Those truth— those realizations were painful but nothing was even more painful than remembering Yonghwa’s face when he told her that he was only scared of losing her. That he wasn’t scared of everything else—just that.

She cried silently on that corner she managed to slump into when Minho left quietly until she decide