Chapter 9: Separation

[Monday May 27th, 2013]

- "Are you sure you don't want to come with me? The hyungs wanted to take us to a fast food restaurant," Yugyeom tells me again, after the teacher finishes his lesson.

Lately, he's been asking me a lot of question along those lines.  And everytime, I would say no.

- "Yugyeommie, I told you before class that I can't come. Youngjae oppa is bringing me somewhere tonight," I remind him.

- "Can we come with you then?" he asks.

- "You can't. Youngjae oppa told me that it would be just the two of us. Mian (sorry)," I apologize while gathering all my stuff and putting them in my bag.

- "Then can you have lunch with me, Jinyoung hyung and BamBam?" he offers.  "It's been a long time since we all last hung out with each other," he continues.  We start to walk out of the classroom.

Now that I think of it, it's been more than two weeks that I've seen the guys.  I've spoken to Jinyoung a bit, but only a few times these past days.  I saw BamBam in the hallways, but we never talked.  And I haven't seen Mark, Jackson or Jaebum at all lately.  The only person I still kind of stay in contact with, is Yugyeom.  And that's only because we're in the same class.  The rest of the time, I'm with Youngjae.  He often waits for me at my locker and we stay together for our breaks or during lunch.  And on weekends, if I'm not at home, I'm usually out with him too.  I guess I kind of drifted away from the guys without realizing it.

I stop and sigh.  I turn to face Yugyeom and he seems slightly upset.

- "Mianhe (I'm sorry) Yugyeommie. But I promise you that I'll have lunch with you one day. Just not today, arraseo (okay)?" I promise, giving him a sorry smile.  I pat his arm then walk away.  He doesn't follow.

Arriving closer to my locker, I spot Youngjae leaning against it, arms crossed and eyes shut.  I approach him quietly and stand right in front of him.

- "Yah!!" I shout while forcefully grasping his arms to shock him.

- "AHH!!" he yells, surprised.  I just laugh at him.

- "I scared you," I say in a childish way after he calms down.  He stares at me then chuckles.

- "You're such a kid," he compares, while ruffling my hair.  I smile at him.  "Ppalli (hurry up), I'm hungry. I want some lunch," he rushes me.

I know it's foolish of me to decline lunch with Yugyeom just because I'm already eating with Youngjae.  But I can't seem to stay away from him.  I know I rejected him when he asked me out, but I still want to spend time with him.  He's still my best friend.  I want it to be like before, when we would be alone together, just chilling.

After putting my stuff in my locker, Youngjae and I walk to the cafeteria as we chat a bit.  When we get there, we order our lunch and sit at a table.

- "Yunhee!!" I hear Jooyeon call out my name.  I look up and she's running towards our table.

- "Annyeong (hi) Jooyeon," Youngjae greets her not paying much attention.

- "Your highness," she says in a rush.  She's been calling Youngjae that nickname since she met him.  She sometimes calls him Prince Charming too.  She said it was because I used to talk and daydream about him and now he suddenly appeared— like a prince coming back to his princess at the end of fairy tales.  Surprisingly he doesn't mind much.

- "What's up?" I ask her.

- "You won't believe it! The rumor..." she trails off to catch her breath.  She sits down on front of us.

- "What about it?" Youngjae questions, suddenly really interested.

Ne (yes), Youngjae found out about the rumors of BamBam and I.  Probably about two weeks ago.

[Tuesday May 14th, 2013]

Where did he go?

I turn in circles, trying to find Youngjae.  It's the end of the day and I'm ready to walk home with him.

I then feel someone take my wrist.  I look to see the owner of hand and I find Youngjae.

- "We need to talk," he tells me seriously.

- "Euh... a-arraseo," I answer as he pulls me to a quiet place outside.  Finally away from people, he lets me go.

- "Wae (why)? You could have just told me from the start," he says after a long silence, his back facing me.

- "What are you talking about?" I ask, after thinking about his words.  He swiftly turns around.

- "Is that why you rejected me when I asked you out? If you were dating someone you could have just told me!" he says then sighs.  "You didn't need to lie and make things up. I don't want to get in the way," his tone becomes softer as he turns away again.  I then realized what he meant.

- "How did you know about this?" I ask him, sitting down on a big rock behind me.

- "My whole class is talking about it. They were saying that you and that BamBam kid are together," he mumbles putting his hands in his pockets.

- "Well it's not true," I reveal, looking at the ground.  He faces me.

- "Huh? What do you mean?" he questions.

- "It's just a rumor. We aren't in a relationship," I explain.

- "But how is there a rumor like that? I barely see you together," he wonders.  I bite my lip.

- "I-It doesn't matter. Just remember that it's all fake, arraseo?" I answer, looking up at him.  He nods.  "Now take off that frown on your face. Smile!" I say trying to light up the mood as I stand up to make him smile with my fingers. 

He soon because happier and smiles truly.  So I part my hands away and link my arm with his as we walk back in the building.

- "So you said that you wouldn't want to get in the way if I was dating someone else, right?" I recall after we talk a bit.  "Does that mean you don't love me enough to intervene between me and that guy?" I interrogate with a pout.  I'm obviously joking though.

- "Of course not! That just means that if you are happy with him, I'm happy with that relationship," he corrects.  I break the link of our arms, moving slightly away from him.

- "Eww! You're so cheesy!! It's disgusting!" I complain.  I start to wipe myself, as if he was dirty.  He starts to laugh at me and I join in soon after.

- "But always remember. Even if you rejected me, as long as you're single, I won't stop trying to get you. I'll even wait if I have to," he tells me after his laughs cool down.  He wraps an arm around my shoulders and pulls me away.

[Monday May 27th, 2013]

- "What happened?" I ask as well.

- "Jinyoung oppa and Yugyeom just revealed that it was false! No more rumor..." Jooyeon says finally, then stealing the water bottle I had.

- "Mwo (what)?" I question.

- "Jinjja (really)?" Youngjae finishes my sentence.  Jooyeon nods.

- "Yeah!" Youngjae and I shout happily, giving a high five to each other.  It's a relief that this weight is off my shoulders.

- "Well you two are rather happy," Jooyeon states.

- "Of course. Why wouldn't we be?" Youngjae and I answer at the same time.

- "And not mention really in sync," she whispers.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I open my locker to take out some books and shove them in my bag.  Youngjae went to his class early because he said he needed to study alone.  After making sure I have everything, I lock my locker.  I start to walk around to pass the time.  I find Yugyeom running in the hallway, turning his head in all directions.

- "Yugyeom!" I call him to get his attention.  He looks to me when he hears his name.  "Jooyeon told me that you and Jinyoung oppa finally ended that rumor. I wanted to thank you,"

- "Cheonmane (you're welcome)" he responds, still looking around.  "Have you seen BamBam anywhere?" he questions in an anxious tone.

- "Um... Ani (no). Wae?" I wonder.

- "He got mad and then ran off.  Jinyoung hyung and me are searching for him, but we can't find him anywhere," he informs me, his expression looking stressed.  My eyes widen.

I might have not been talking to BamBam much these past two weeks, but he's still my friend.  I still care for him a lot.  And finding out that he is gone makes me worry.  Though, I know he won't do anything stupid to himself, I'm still afraid that he gets hurt or something.

- "Did you look upstairs? O-or in the cafeteria? How about the gym?" I start to panic.

- "Ne. We checked every floor," he tells me.  I think carefully.

- "Outside! Did you see if he was outside?" I interrogate.  He shakes his head.

I move past Yugyeom, going towards the nearest exit.  He follows and we head out.

- "I'll go this way. And you go that way," he points somewhere to my left, wanting me to go in that direction.  He is about to leave but I grab his wrist to stop him.

- "Wait... Why was BamBam mad?" I inquire hesitantly.  I'm curious.  And also, I need to know how to comfort him if I ever do find him.

- "You don't hang out with us often anymore. And he's jealous of the one who does," he smiles weakly at me then runs off to seek for his best friend.  I turn the other way to search too, while many thoughts stay stuck in my head.

'He's jealous of the one that does,'... That means he's jealous of... Youngjae?

After a long four minutes of looking around, I worry even more.  I start to think that outside is not the right place to look.  As I am about to go back to find Yugyeom, I spot a boy with his hands in his pockets.  He kicks small rocks on the ground.  My face lightens up and I sprint towards him.  I hug him tightly, surprising him.

- "BamBam! Finally I found you!" I pull away.  "We were looking everywhere for you! You got me worried!" I tell him.

- "I... I," he stutters, still shocked.

- "Don't ever run away again. Even if you're mad, arraseo?" I instruct as I hug him again.

He nods as an answer and hugs back.  My heartbeat speeds up at his actions.  I back away slightly, afraid that he might feel my heart thumping. But we still stay close.  My hands are still around his neck, his around my waist.  Our faces are not very far apart either.

- "Mianhe. I don't spend much time with you anymore and I've been practically ignoring you," I admit to him.  My heart flutters as he smiles.

- "It's–" he starts.

- "BAMBAM!!" Yugyeom yells.  BamBam and I swiftly push each other apart.  I scratch the back of my neck.  "Oh Yunhee. Did I interrupt something?" he asks.

BamBam and I glance at each other then shake our heads. A visible shade of pink appears on our cheeks, making it obvious we're lying.  Yugyeom eyes us suspiciously.

This is awkward...

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

RRRIIINNNGGG!!!

After hearing the bell, the teacher dismisses us from class.  I walk out with Yugyeom.

- "You guys were up to something. I just know it!" Yugyeom says, referring to the scene of BamBam and I, before he walked in on us.

- "Yugyeom. I told you, nothing was going on!" I lie.  I chuckle, amused at his excitement.

- "Let me guess, you were just about to..." he starts, ignoring what I said.  He looks around him then comes closer.  "Kiss," he whispers in my ear.  

- "Yah (hey)! Are you kidding me!? What is wrong with you!?" I shove him to the side.  Of course I would disagree.  We weren't JUST about to kiss.  BamBam was still talking...

- "Come on! I know what was happening! Admit it noona, you like BamBam," he says.

- "Aniyo (no)! I... Wait a minute. Did you just call me 'noona'?" I ask in disbelief.  He nods. 

- "I know how much you hate it when I say that. That's why I'll call you noona until you admit you like BamBam," he persuades and walks away.

- "Yah! You can't do that! Come back here! I'm not even you're noona!" I start to yell.

- "Bye noona! See you later!" he waves at me.

I shrug off what Yugyeom said, planning to deal with him later.  Going to my locker, I find Youngjae already there, eyes once again shut.  I stand in front of him, wanting to scare him once more.

- "I know you're there," he says, surprising me instead.  His eyes stay closed.

- "Oh," I chuckle, ignoring his serious tone.

- "I saw you outside, after I left. It seemed like you were enjoying yourself," he tells me.  I look at him confusingly.

- "Mwo?" I ask.  I wonder how he found out I went out.  He sighs and opens his eyes to look at me.

- "Kyoh Yunhee, I really don't understand you. First, when I find out you're in this 'secret relationship' with some guy, you tell me that it's all a rumor and that I shouldn't worry about it. Then a few weeks later, the rumor ends and you become super happy.  And next thing I know, when I turn my back, you're all over the guy! I don't know–" he gets cut off by myself.

- "Bwo!? Since when was I 'all over' BamBam?" I question, even though I knew what he meant.

- "Yunhee, don't act like you don't know what I'm talking about. I know you talked to BamBam and I know you guys kissed!" he says, irritated.  At this rate, I don't care if anyone hears our conversation.

- "Why do you always assume things!? For starters, you believed that the rumor was true and now, this!" I raise my voice.  I'm getting mad.  Does he not believe me when I say I still like him?

- "Assume? What do you mean 'assume'? I saw you with my own eyes!" he proves.

- "Well then you saw it wrong! We weren't doing anything!" I tell him.  "And anyway, why do you even care if I'm with someone!? It's not like we're together!" I blurt out suddenly.  Youngjae's expression softens.

- "You're right. What was I thinking? I'm not your boyfriend. How can I be so stupid? I have no meaning to you," he says then walks past me.

- "Oppa... Wait," I try to hold him back but he continues to walk away.

Looking behind me, I realize that people were watching us argue.  My head hangs low in shame.  I quickly get my books for my next class while some students leave.

What have I done? I'm the stupid one here. How could I have said that to him? Look what I got myself into! If I just had been more careful, I don't think this would have happened. If I had just walked away when I bumped into BamBam the first day of school, I probably wouldn't have talk to him. Then we wouldn't be so close. That rumor wouldn't have started, and my feelings for him would have probably not developed. Then the promise with Youngjae wouldn't be broken and I wouldn't have to lie to him. And maybe, just maybe, I would have said yes when he asked me out.  We could be together. We could be happy. But no. We're not. We're sad. We're apart.  Because of one wrong thing I did, we're separated.

Hello!!! Sorry for the wait! I wasn't really sure how to write this chapter that's why it took so long (and because I became kinda lazy :/ Sorry...). But here you go! I hope you liked it!! I really did enjoy writing it!

Please comment! Tell me what you think (whether it's to just let out your feels or to judge my chapter/story)! It will make me happy!  And subscribe too if you haven't yet! I'll try to update faster next time!

God bless you!

Author, out~