I have a long day ahead of me and I should prepare to fight my battles. My first battle- not to see the man living in my guest room. I dressed up for the day and slowly walked down. Since yesterday I realized that both of us almost start to work at the same time, I decided I would start earlier. So I got up an hour before and was ready almost 45 minutes than my regular time. I slowly walked down the stairs and noticed Jillian come in and make her way to Sasi’s room. We both exchanged quick morning greetings. But even she can see that I’m acting like a cat burglar in my home….my own home.

After I have ensured that the area is ‘Siwon- free’ I relax and walk to the kitchen to get some water. I don’t know if he is still in the room or if he has left already. I don’t want to go to his room and stick my ear to the door to hear what he is doing inside. I would never do that……or will i?

No I will not! I scold myself.

I take my bottle of cold water and turn to the kitchen counter to get a glass. Instead, I was greeted by a tall glass of orange juice, a Sunrise muffin and a bright yellow sunflower. On seeing the delicious food in front of me, my stomach starts to awaken itself.

As I stare at the food, I notice a note stuck to the glass of orange juice. It read:

I know you did not have dinner last night,

Eat this.

I will not stop papering my little angel.

I have all the rights and I will take full advantage of them to care for her, cherish her and protect her.

And…I Love You.

On reading the note, I went pale and frozen to the ground. This little note, told me a lot of things that made me happy, excited, scared, angry and teary. The last words…

‘And … I Love You’ is the one that made me terrified…. And unknowingly happy.

Siwon has addressed his feelings for me directly. Like hitting me on the forehead with a bullet and I certainly felt that way. God. Today my body was responding appropriately to this note well. I was trembling. I confirmed that I was terrified of this whole situation and Siwon just upped the benchmark.

SImple WONders Meeting Room: 11.00 am

“ Miss Day and Miss Rawaq, thank you for your generous hospitality.” Ethan Warwick was all flowery words and honey mouth. I hated such kinds and I certainly hated Ethan and his sweet talk.

“ Cut the crap Warwick and get to business.” Nancy snapped on behalf of me. I love my girlfriend. She knows me in and out. I smiled at her and she raised her shoulders to inform me that she exactly thought what I was thinking.

“ Alright then…Siwon would you do the presentation?” Ethan asked

“ Sure…” Siwon was all bright eyes and oozing determination. His method of work always interested me…..in him. Well I got knocked up by him, dint i? And now he was 1000 times more charming and my mind hated it. But my heart and body was already falling flat on the ground.

I sat right opposite Ethan and Nancy opposite Siown. We never mentioned to Ethan the relationship between Siwon and me…. or whatever we were having.

Siwon started his presentation. He was once again in a white crisp shirt that was tucked in perfectly into his formal black-blue pants. He had rolled up his sleeves up to his elbow and had his dark blue silk tie on today. He walked up to the podium set up his laptop, wore his glasses and adjusted his tie. Oh my! I could see a little skin when he opened his collar button.  I hate it when Siown is in his element and he definitely is in his element now.

Suddenly my mind started to wander… the things I could let Siwon do to me with the tie… I could let him replace the ‘Pink Ribbon’ with his silk tie and secure my wrists with it. He could then tantalizing slowly pop the buttons of my blouse and open my shirt to his eyes. As I squirmed under his now chest, he could then slowly my skirt and pull it down as he placed feather kisses as he removes it….over my waist…over my hip bone…over my dressed womanhood… and down my thigh. Then he could hover over me and watch me like a prey he wants to hunt all night long and unhurriedly tug my bra cup down so that my is free and at his disposal. He could then squeeze it making me moan and then he could clamp his lips around my tender spot making me wither and moan his name just he way he likes it….and….and….!

Dara! Snap out! OH MY GOD!! I wanted to literally slap my self at these unwanted thoughts in broad daylight in the middle of my office conference room. !

I was unable to sit in the room. I was suffocation and I had to get away.

I got up immediately, receiving the full attention of the room on me. Siwon stopped talking and looked at me too. That’s when I realized that he had already started his presentation I was not paying attention to it all. I was in a different place altogether.

“ Excuse me…” I whispered and literally bolted out of the room. I was plainly panting and wanted all the oxygen in the world in my lungs right now. I went up to the pantry and shocked the staff there with my appearance. Well, I have been a to them, now I was a scary . I went straight to the water dispenser and drank 5 tall glasses of cold water. My body was on fire…I was on fire. I needed something to cool me…anything. Katie then came running towards me and asked me if I needed anything. I refused.

I had to gather myself up, be my professional self and get out there. This my battle to fight and I cant loose to Siwon’s perfect face. NO! I will win this. My pep talk was helping me. I had one more glass of water, straightened myself and walked tall, proud and arrogant to the room.

The three in the room, were discussing something very interestingly.

Dara walked in with a clear face back into the room. I wonder what caught her off guard like that. She was and is always focused and if she sets her eyes on something, she will get it. But what happened to her now?

“ Yes…Mr. Choi, please continue with your presentation.” She said sternly as she looked into the data papers that was presented to her. whoa! I loved this Dara. The stern, professional, stubborn Dara. That is the woman who stole my heart and right now, she is making my heart flutter and my groin work. This is not a good sign, especially during work. I can’t let Ethan down.

“ Alright…” I said and started the presentation. After about 30 minutes of presenting the details about SImple WONders and how Warwick Consultancies could help it, we started with discussion. With practical work and examples. Nancy shot some very important questions and Dara seemed to agree with her questions. Then Dara asked a few critical questions to which both Ethan and me responded. But Dara was not satisfied. Our answers were irritating her and she made that very clear. But our job, or mainly my job was to convince her that SImple WONders did need a little organization.

Out discussion heated up to a point where Dara and me were yelling our arguments to each other across the table.

“ Listen here Siwon, I developed the company and I know how it is organized. In fact I also involved management consultants during the build up period, so I know what each and every in of this company.

“ I’m sure, Dara…”

“ Miss Day, it will be Miss Day” she corrected me with a fiery look. God, the things this woman can do to me.

“ Ok… Miss Day, I’m sure you do know and are well aware of the ins of the company, but you do have to remember that the organization does need some change periodically. This is necessary and very much needed. You company is in the right state for such a state without much losses.”

“ That is ridiculous, and I will not agree to your bloody suggestion. I know how this industry works. So I know that periodical changes need to be made and now is not the time. I know the details and the people we deal with. Such changes need to be done with them in consideration, and you have not taken that factor into consideration. So, your suggestion goes moot.” She fired back. Damn. Sandara Evelyn Day is standing in front of me. We stood in front of the table, arguing our minds out. Ethan and Nancy were looking at us with tension in their faces. Honestly they were right to be like that, because Dara and me were heading towards pulling each other’s hair out.

“ I understand miss Day, but I am talking from a management perspective and you really need to do this for the success for your own company.” I really wanted to do this. Suddenly making Dara accept the offer became my mission.

“ This company is my brain child and I will not let my child go wayward. So no. End of discussion. ”

She argued with her eyes blazing. I was stunned with the power she held in her eyes. She could burn me down and well she is. I could not counter argue more than that, mainly because I could not find words. All I wanted to do now was throw the papers from my hand, scoop her up in my arms and kiss her hard…really hard that she is panting and make her beg… for me. I wanted to lift her, throw her on the large conference table in front of us, so that her purple hair fans out like the feathers of a peacock, pull her skirt up to her waist and tear whatever knickers she is wearing right now. I want to open her legs for me while I stand in between them and make her moan my name… just the way she always does, when I touch her and watch her soft flesh of her woman hood throb for me. Then when she just does not expect it, plunge into her and bury myself deep into her and make her scream…scream hard. Oh God! My groin hurts.

I’m running out of breath. ! Not now.

“ Excuse me.” I excused myself and ran out the door. What is wrong with me? ! How can I think of Dara like that??!! Oh God! I have never felt any desire for any woman in these past four years and now just three weeks with Dara, I’m aching with feelings that I thought I lost forever.

I run to the nearest water dispenser, which apparently is in the staff pantry. I run into the room shocking Dara’s staff. “ Hello.” I pant my greets and pick out a tall tumbler and gulp in ice cold water. I have no idea how much I was drinking, but I drank till the dispenser was out of water completely. I still needed more water. Phew, that was hot and I don’t think I can see Dara the same way again. But I should be a gentleman. I squeeze my head with my hands and decide to get the much-wanted image of Dara out my head. I could not get it out, but I was able to out it behind. This feeling is very renewed for me and I’m liking it.

SImple WONders: Dara’s office.

It’s been a busy day and the week has come and gone, the weekend has come and gone. I tried my best to escape the unwelcomed guest to whom my body is reacting with a spark. I literally stayed with Nancy and Mark over the weekend and made sure Sasi is in my sight. I cant believe that I am running away from my own home. This is crazy. Mark informed us that he is flying to New York for a fashion show so he will not be around for a while. We will miss him and his gay talk. But he did promise to bring back some good American chocolate.

Bringing me back to reality, I heard my phone ring.

“ Hello..” I greeted.

“ Hello Miss Day, this is Ahmed Al Mansoori, from Dubai Fashion School.” I heard form the other side. Mr. Ahmed Al Mansoori is the head of the Fashion School and with whom SImple WONders have collaborated to open internships for new graduates.

“ Hello Mr. Mansoori. It’s really great to hear form you. How are you doing?”

“ I’m good thank you. im sorry, I heard about Mr. Tachibana. My condolences. I was out of country during that time.”

“ Its fine and thank you. Work and my daughter are keeping me busy.” I gave out a sad laugh. But to god’s honesty, I do miss Arata and his charms at home. He was warm and total shock absorber.

“ That’s great to know. Always the professional Miss Day.”

“ Well, life has to go on Mr. Mansoori.”

“ Than is true. Well, the reason I called today is, I wanted to personally invite you to a charity ball im holding two weeks from now. “

“ A charity ball, that’s great. What is the charity?”

“ Its my own charity trust I created. We aim to provide basic education for children who have no access to such education in third world countries. With the help of my contacts, my charity gathers books and sends children to those counties and teaches them. Those children even get a chance to visit Dubai and study in schools we have here for a year.”

“ Wow, sounds amazing. Mr. Mansoori I’ve not head of such work from you. This is really great. You are a wonderful job.”

“ Well, before you appreciate me more, during the ball, I would like you to donate something towards the education for children.”

“ Oh come on, I will definitely do and may be we could talk more collaborations.” I hinted.

“ Always taking up opportunities! Miss Day you amaze me. We shall talk about it very soon.” I laughed.

“ I will also personally invite Miss Rawaq.”

“ Fantastic. We will RSVP the invite.”

“ Good. Talk to you later then. Good bye and good day to you.”

“ And to you.” I said and put my phone down.

A charity ball…. interesting.

After 20 minutes Nancy called….

“ So you are going? “ I knew exactly what she was talking about.

“ Yes…and its good for our business too. More publicity.”

“ Cool then…we need to go shopping.”

“ Why shopping?”

“ Well excuse me, Mark is not here and we need a dress.”

“ We have dresses.” I stressed on the ‘es’.

“ But I want to go shopping and you have to come with me.” I laughed at my grown up friend.

“ Sure…this weekend. Done!” we just like that confirmed the weekend plan.

It was Thursday and the last day of the working week in Dubai. The office was getting empty early, but that’s not the case with me. I have to finish a lot more work. Nancy left for her home as well.

It was 7.30 pm and it was getting dark outside. I got myself a cup of tea and decided to take a break before I resume my work. I was browsing the Internet, and for non work purposes. I remembered Nancy wanted to buy some dresses this weekend, so I was checking out the new designs for the season. As I was scrolling and adoring the dresses and their designs, I came across an article title that read:

‘ Neon Lights a Total Failure and a Black Spot for Korean Fashion’

My heart sank into a black hole. Neon Lights? The Neon Lights that I built? The Neon Lights for which I worked so hard? Oh My God! Whatever it is, Neon Lights was Siwon’s hard work and gave his blood and sweat for it.  I put my tea mug and started frantically searching for Neon Lights on Google. I was praying that it should not be the Neon Lights I worked for.

As Google gave me the result, my heart clenched and was nailed. It was the same Neon Lights I worked for. It is the same Neon Lights, which was the main reason me and Siwon met, the same Neon Lights, Siwon dedicated so much of his strength. Oh dear lord. The more I read about its failure and how bad it is doing in the fashion world, it mad me really sick. Many articles had my name on it and that I abandoned it. I felt guilty and well, I did abandon it. But it was not my fault. Siwon was there and I thought ‘She’ would take care. But no… why did Siwon not develop it? Why did ‘She’ not let him? The better he worked, more the money for her.

Besides, it is his hard work that he abandoned when he was there. He proved himself as a coward who just ran away from something he built.

With more and more articles popping, hours flew by. It was already 10.30pm when I check the clock. My head throbbed with headache and my stomach was twisting. I had to head home.

Neon Lights is no longer mine and I have to get it into my head. SImple WONders is mine now. This is my life now. I took one last look at the picture of the Neon Lights building in Seoul and shut down my computer.

I reached home much slower than other days. Since it was the weekend, families were out late and enjoying themselves and me, I was working like a maniac with my daughter with a nanny. This was the story of my life.

I just wanted to get out of the crowd. I drove fast and reached my home. As I entered, the living room lights were switched off, with only the hanging lights above the kitchen counter. My curiosity took over me, and I peeked a little towards the side of Siwon’s room. I saw his door open, but no sign of him. The room lights were switched on. I did not bother more than that.

“ Hello Miss Day.” Jillian greeted me coming down the stairs.

“ Hi Jillian. Thank you staying. I’ll call you tomorrow if I need you to be here. Me and Nancy may be going out and I will take Sasi with me.”

“ Sure miss Day. The dinner is in the fridge.”

“ Fantastic. Did Sasi eat well or did she put up a fight?”

“ Yup, she and her new friend ate a lot that I had to make more for you. Now she is sound asleep. You know I’ve never seen her eat soo much and enjoy it too.”

“ Her new friend? Someone from play school?”

“ No…someone from your guest room.” I stopped from pulling my jacked off and looked at her.

“ She kept playing and he had a way with her and fed her food and she did not even know she was eating. They were playing and eating and she kept squealing Sisi, Sisi. Miss Day, my eardrums are off. If I have to go the ENT doctor, you better get me appointment with the best doctors.” Jillina joked. Wow, Sasi ate her food without making a ruckus. Well, she is not a picky eater, but like other kids, she does make a fuss. Sometimes her fuss annoys me and makes me irritated.

“ Well, that’s good to know. Its late anyway. I’ll call you tomorrow.” I said and Jillian was on her way home.

I went straight up to check on Sasi. My sweet angel was sleeping peacefully and looking at her mad me forget all the worries, regrets and headaches. I went in and gave her a good night kiss. She flinched a little in her sleep. I stilled for a moment. After she settled, I covered her with her Barbie blanket and walked to my room.

I’m twisting and turning in my bed. I try to lay on my back, no sleep, I lay on my side, no sleep, I try to sit up no sleep. My head is hurting like 10 people are punching my brain at once. I checked my bedside clock it was 3.20am. I checked my phone clock; it said 3. 25am. The AC showed temperature of 18 degrees and even though I’m sleeping in my spaghetti top and knickers, I feel so hot. I push the blanket off me and get up. I sit on the bed for a moment trying to get my though together.

So many thoughts, so many memories, so many worries, so many nightmares. I don’t know what to do. My brain is just not letting me sleep. Ive lost my peaceful sleep, again. I’m not happy, I’m not sad, I’m not angry….I’m just confused and technically now, my headache is back and its making me giddy.

I’m lazy to walk down to the kitchen to get myself anything to eat or drink. I mean come-on, its 3.30 in the morning and in a  few hours I have to get up to meet Nancy for brunch. Gah! Another reminder and my brain just went for another punch.

I lazily make my way to the balcony of my room hoping the breach sea breeze would do me some good. I open the door, NOPE! Just hot sea breeze and it’s definitely not doing any good for me. Well, I’m in Dubai, what can I expect?  However, I just stand for a while and observe the twinkling of the ship lights afar. Some breeze hits me again and I fell a little comfortable. I fold my arms around myself. Some perspiration had dried off. Curiosity again takes hold of me. I slowly peek down to the guest room balcony to see if Siwon is up or if he is sleeping. Anybody in their right mind would be sleeping in this hour. But there was some, atom size hope in me that he would be awake.

I look down, but his bedroom lights were off and the door to the balcony was tightly closed. What are you doing Dara!? My brain hits me. I physically slap myself. I should not be in the look out for Siwon. He just a guest, He is just a guest, He is just a guest. I tell myself.

My last attempt to sleep: I go back inside, close the balcony door tightly and check the bed side clock again. Its shoes 3.40 am. God damn it, why is the time not moving faster?!

I take a sip of water from my bedside bottle and tuck myself in bed again. I inhale and exhale a good amount of air and close my eyes.

NOPE! No sleep. Gah! This is going crazy. I am this close to getting myself some sleeping pills. Wish Arata was here… he would give me a massage or something and I would then sleep like a baby. Arata I miss you!

I decide, I’ll get myself some hot milk. If hot milk is not doing the trick, then I’m not sleeping tonight. I check the time, its 4.00 am. Once I get up, I feel my head heavy again and a punch too. I physically hold my head, close my eyes trying to top the pain and walk out.

As I walk down the stairs, I keep massaging my head trying to reduce the pain and my eye lids get slowly heavy. I walk barefooted into the open kitchen. I open my eyes, the living room is dark and the hanging lights dimly illuminate the kitchen area. I rummage thought the fringed and get the milk, my extra large mug, some cinnamon, some shaved almonds and some brown sugar. Suddenly I feel like Nigella Lawson*.

With the little lights, I get busy. I hate cooking, but heating up milk with some extra stuff is not really considered cooking is it? I put a sauce pan on heat, pour the milk, add cinnamon, sugar and almond shaves. Wait for it to come to a boil, which is taking forever and my head is aching again. I stretch put lifting my arms and trying to pull my limbs to the fullest.

The milk comes to a boil and the kitchen is filled with beautiful aroma. Unknowingly I smile. I pour the hot liquid into my mug and slowly start sipping.

Ah! This feels good. I fell good. I take another sip and the feeling of the hot liquid flowing down my throat to my tummy. it feels heavenly.

I stand and walk around the kitchen. I go in rounds and try my best not to think of anything, but just think of sleep and the drink in hand. I do exactly that. I finish off my drink till the last drop. I even go the extent of lifting the mug over my open mouth to capture the very, very last drop of milk.

When I’m standing in the middle of the kitchen, in my knickers and spaghetti top, my purple hair tied up into a messy bun and my mouth open and my extra large much tilted upside down, I hear a light laugh. I immediately look in the direction of the laughter. ! Its Siwon!

I drop my mug on the floor and it shatters into pieces.

“ Oh Dara!”  He exhales a soft scold and comes forward to pick up the broken pieces. I scoot down the moment he comes near by. Our heads bump and I fall on my bum. I watch him smile at me and pick up the pieces in his hand. Say something Dara! Say something! My mind was officially yelling at me. But no, I was in total mind, body dysfunction spot. I watched him the entire time laying flat on my bum as he gracefully picked up every piece of my broken mug and threw them into the bin. I had not also noticed that he was bare chested. His collar bone as deep as ever, his chest, the same way I last saw it, his abs, much harder, his belly button, as cute as ever. I could not move, I just sat here with my hands behind me and my weight on my bum.

“ Come on.” he smiled and extended his hand.

I look at him and he was definitely looking at me, but with a slight smile on his face.

I took his hand, because honestly, I was now feeling sleepy, shocked and surprised and giddy- surely giddy.

“ Up you go.” He whispered as he wrapped his arm around my waist, took my weight into his arms and lifted me to my feet. I wrapped one of my arms around his neck while he lifted me. This action may have been just a second, but that second I was on fire. I felt his body brush against my body under the top. I could surely feel my s harden. My stupid, stupid body! I gasped

“ You ok Dara?” he bent down so that he could be eye level with me.

“ Yes, im fine.” I whisper. Dara! Speak up! My mind was yelling. I’m acting stupid here and I know it.

“ Alright then…. Goonnight Dara. I’ll see you tomorrow morning.” He said and turned.

There! I had my first view of Siwon’s burnt skin on his back. The spot which once held my name as a tattoo and the devil of a woman burnt the skin off alive. It was one dark patch of skin that definitely looked spoilt, on his hard, perfect back. Oh God. That moment, I wanted to run to him, hug him and kiss the spot of burnt skin. I wanted to kiss his back so hard that he would forget the pain he rendered through. But no, I cant do that. No! NO! NO!

“ How…how long were you been standing there?” I finally spoke up. He turned to face me.

“ Hmm?”

“ I asked how long were you standing there? Watching me drink…milk?” I looked down.

“ Since the minute you stepped down the stairs Dara.” God he is saying Dara at every breath and hearing it after so long feels like soft cloud, cool breeze and orchid flowers. More than that, he has been watching me stand there, make my milk, walk around and drink it, without making a single noise? While im literally half ?! Oh Jesus!

“ Why did you….you not call out?” I asked him. I looked everywhere except him.

“ Because I know you did not have dinner and you were hungry, and you could not sleep. I knew you would come down, so I waited for you to fill your stomach with something. I just wanted to make sure you ate something.”

“ What if I had not come down at all?”

“ Then I would have prepared a big breakfast for you tomorrow morning. I could have made you a sandwich and come to your room, but I don’t have permission. ” I again looked everywhere except him and I know he is looking at me.

I feel he is taking a step forward towards me and I’m not moving.

“ I care for you Dara… please eat. I need you healthy. Good night baby.” He said, bend down, kissed my cheek and left.

I am stunned, shocked and lost control of everything. He just kissed me, called me baby, called my name in the most soothing way I have ever felt and he said he needs me… Do I need him?

I don’t know what happened to me, it just came out. I had expected a slap on my face, but she just stood there and so did i. I watched her make and drink that milk. if I had interrupted her, she would have left immediately. But now… with me around, she is shocked. But there was a linger of warmth and care for me. I saw it…. in her eyes. Does she still love me? She does, if not, if she has totally forgotten me, her hand would have striked me.