I fall backwards and land into the plush down blanket on my hotel room’s bed after a moment of reviewing everything that just transpired over the past fifteen minutes.
     Wow.
     I’m left breathless and my skin tingles everywhere, especially where he touched me. My face, my neck, my waist burns deep below the surface of my skin. 
     I wrap my arms around myself and turn onto my side staring out of one of the rooms massive windows. The lights of the city that never sleeps illuminates my room and it draws me out of bed. I’m restless. I can’t sleep. 
     After gazing out the window for a few moments, I decide that maybe I should wash off some of the days events from my body. The city air leaves me feeling dirty, and my recently rustled emotions may calm themselves with a relaxing shower.
     I stay in there for longer than I can imagine. It had to have been at least an hour. My mind raced around this new step Seunghyun and my relationship has taken. It was only three months ago that I was tripping over and embarrassing myself in front of him and now he has confessed his love for me.
     And he has freaked out after making out with me.
     …
     This is what I have always wanted!
     People I have seen in the past have always moved so fast that everything always happened before I could even feel anything. Maybe thats why relationships always felt so weird to me. They never lasted very long before I was turned off and I ended them.
     All of them except for Dean.
     Dean.
     For the first time ever, someone left me before I was sick of the way he treated me as a woman. (Well, not like I had many relationships to begin with but…)
     Don’t get me wrong, I hold no feelings for him anymore. I haven’t in a while. His attitude on Christmas Eve has just bothered me a bit and since this is my first serious relationship, I can’t help but compare everything Seunghyun does for and to me to the only other somewhat almost relationship I ever had. 
     Seunghyun confessed to me tonight. He also ran out of my room the moment I accidentally found myself sitting on my bed. Is this the same thing that happened with Dean and I? The moment things heated up, Dean stopped talking to me. Will Seunghyun do the same? What is wrong with me? Am I doing something wrong? But then again, I went home that night before anything could really happen.
     Is Seunghyun just being the respectful person that he is? Is he showing me respect? I came to the conclusion a long time ago that Dean left me because I didn’t jump into his bed the moment he decided he wanted to move into a more intimate relationship with me though he gave me no benefit of a title. 
    I take a deep breath before I turn the shower off and step out. I grab a towel and dry myself off and then wrap it around my hair. 
     After finding my overnight bag and sifting through it a bit, I find my nightgown and put it on. I don’t know what my mom was aiming to do by packing my nightgown and not something a bit more-well-casual... but I will chose to ignore it. I feel so clean now, but hardly relaxed. I take the towel off and brush through my hair till my blood pressure calms and I go to bed with wet hair.
     But I don’t fall asleep. I turn from side to side but I can’t get comfortable even with all of the pillows and the feeling of the silk blanket covering my body. I look at the clock and it reads two in the morning. I sigh because if I don’t fall asleep soon I’m going to be miserable in the morning.
     I’m thirsty.
     I get out of bed and grab the robe that matches my nightgown to put over me before I walk out and into the hotel room looking for the kitchen. It’s dark and quiet. I assume Seunghyun has gone into his room (wherever that may be) and has long since gone to bed. I wonder around the enormous room. How can there not be a kitchen in this gigantic place? I decide to walk up the stairs because maybe a little exploring will help me get tired. 
     Found it. I knew there had to be a kitchen! 
     I grab a glass from one of the cabinets and bring it to the sink, filling it up. 
     I bring the glass to my lips and sip while looking around my dark surroundings. When I look forward I see a shadow of a man surrounded by city lights and his head turns, revealing a small glowing red light. It’s not part of the city. 
     Seunghyun is bent over resting his arms on a balcony that I didn’t know we had. I set my glass down on the counter and choose not to think before walking and opening the sliding glass door. The smooth noise makes him stand up straight and his hand quickly lifts to pluck the cigarette from his mouth. He drops it to the floor and puts it out with his foot.
     “What are you doing up?” I ask.
     “N-nothing. Cant sleep,” he says. “What about you?” he reaches out and takes some of my wet hair into his hand. “Amelia, go inside! It’s freezing ou