Chapter 44

“After your father passed away, you tried to kill yourself.”

The air in your room went still and silence took over. You were trying to process the thoughts in your head. Mr. Lee knew what was going on and remained quiet. He wasn’t sure if he was allowed to tell you this but he just felt that it was the right time and he couldn’t bear to see you hurt any longer. You’ve been deeply affected by your father’s death and Mr. Lee just wanted to see the old you back. The one that smiled every day, talkative and friendly. He just didn’t want to see you suffer anymore.

“I know this is a lot to take Young Master but—“

“How?” You cut him off. The lump in your throat was threatening to escape.

“You…jumped down from the second story of your class, when you were still in middle school. You hit your head and lost a lot of blood. But the doctors managed to save you but some parts of your brain was damaged, although not so serious, you’d feel a painful throb whenever you start to overthink about stuff.” He explained. From the tone of his voice, you could tell that he was holding back.

You looked at him and his eyes and nose were red from trying to hold back the tears. Mr. Lee really hated those days, watching you unconscious on the bed for months, thinking how could an innocent little girl even have suicidal thoughts at that young age?

You reached out for his hand and gave it a gentle squeeze. You knew how much he cared for you. He filled in the father role for you after your father passed away. He loved you and you loved him. The tears in your eyes began to spill out and both you and Mr. Lee let giggled.

“I tried so hard to not let it out.” You said, referring to your tears.

Mr. Lee wiped your face with the back of his hand and cupped your face. “You’ve grown into a strong woman Young Master. Your father would be so proud of you like how I am.” He grinned.

He then cleared his throat and stood up, straightening his blazer before bowing to you. “Well, that was pleasant wasn’t it? It’s time for you to get some sleep Young Master. Goodnight.” He said before leaving the room.

The moment the door of your bedroom closed, the lump in your throat escaped and you let all the tears fall. You didn’t even know why you were crying. You pulled your knees closer to you and hugged them while your shoulders jerked up and down because of your breathing. To think that you actually tried to kill yourself when you were just a little girl. That was how much you loved your father. You loved him so much that you wanted to be with him, even if it meant taking your own life.

But now, you know better than to just throw your life away. Your father would have wanted you to keep on living. Yes, that should be it. You held that thought in your mind and slowly, you fell into a deep slumber.

You woke up the next day, feeling much better. The tears left a dry stain on your face but you didn’t mind it at all. You felt as though you just hit a reset button in your life. You got out of bed but had to quickly grab onto something for support when you felt as though you were about to topple over.

Okay, maybe I should just take it easy for now.

Once you regained your balance, you got into the shower and put on some clean clothes before heading downstairs to get some breakfast. The maids in the house greeted you as usual. It seemed that Mr. Lee was out at the company helping out your Mother again, which reminded you of your engagement to Kyungsoo. The both of you had still not done anything to stop it, and it had to be done soon. You grabbed your phone, thinking of asking Kyungsoo to come over but instead you froze in your spot as you stared at the unread message. It was from Chanyeol.

Meet me here tonight. I need to see you.
Chanyeol

Attached to the text message was an address. Some place quite far from where your house was. Kyungsoo can wait. You really needed to see Chanyeol. You didn’t know why but somewhere in the pit of your stomach, you didn’t have a good feeling about what was going to happen. You quickly finished your breakfast and headed back in your room. You grabbed a duffel bag and packed some stuff; a first aid kit, some bottled water, towels, your jacket, phone charger and your wallet. You then took your phone and called Yeseo to come over.

She came in a flash through your bedroom door an hour later looking panicked.

“I got your message. What do you urgently need help with?” She closed the door and walked towards you, not before noticing that you were carrying the huge bag over your shoulders. Giving you a suspicious look, she hesitantly asked you, “Hae Ra, where the hell are you going?”

You grabbed her hands and pulled her to sit with you on the bed. She examined your face, trying to decipher your expression.

“I need your help to cover me.” You told her.

“What? What do you mean cover you—“

“Yeseo, Chanyeol didn’t come back last night like he promised.”

She looked at you for a second and tried to break out into a smile. “Hae Ra, maybe he was too tired or something came up the last minute—“

“No Yeseo, Chanyeol would never break a promise. Especially not with me. And I got a text message from him this morning, telling me to go meet him somewhere.” You took out your phone and showed her the message as proof.

“Oh my God, that does sound serious. Okay, so what do you want me to do?”

“I need you to cover me from my mother.”

Yeseo’s eyes widened and she threw her hands up. “What? I’m not—I can’t do that! You know your mother, she’s smart! She’ll catch on real quick!”

You grabbed her hands to calm her down. “Trust me! I’ll be back before you know it. All you have to do is just lie in my bed, cover yourself and pretend to be me. I’ll be back before midnight, I promise.” You looked at her desperately. Time is ticking and you didn’t want to waste any more of it.

She bit her lip and finally gave in to you before giving you a stern look and pinched your cheeks. “Fine. You better be back by midnight and you owe me.”

You struggled before slapping her hand away from your cheeks and smiled. “Thanks a lot. And of course, I’m helping you to get together with Kyungsoo aren’t I?”

She smirked and rolled her eyes before getting into position in your bed under your cover. “Well, it’s taking a bloody long time isn’t it?” She laughed. “I’m kidding, now go! Shoo!”

You giggled before mouthing the words love you and disappeared out of the window. Thank God Kyungsoo taught you how to sneak out from your window the first time he came over. You had no trouble getting down at all. You made a note to yourself to thank him later. Quickly, you then ran sneakily past the maids and climbed over the gate after throwing the big bag over it. Running as quickly as your two skinny legs could, you managed to get out to the main road and hailed a taxi. You showed the driver the address on your phone and prayed for the best.

“Miss, Miss, we’re here.”

You woke up to the sound of the driver, alerting you that the taxi had reached its destination. You wiped the drool from the corner of your lips and paid the fee before getting out. You stretched your legs and looked at your watch. It took you two hours to get here; wherever that is. Looking around, it seemed that you were in a small neighborhood with small houses that were squeezed side by side along that small and narrow road. No one was around, except for an old man who was busy digging up something from a trashcan.

“Okay…so now where do I go?” You mumbled to yourself and took out your phone.

You dialed Chanyeol’s number but was surprised when he rejected the call.

“What the—“

Just then your phone buzzed and there was a text message from him.

Follow these directions. I’ll meet you there.
Chanyeol

Your jaw dropped and you sighed in disbelief. What am I, Sherlock?

You slung your bag over your shoulders and followed the directions he gave you; climbing up a hill, walking between narrow paths which initially lead you to a dirt path. You weren’t sure whether to carry on with the journey but the thought of Chanyeol waiting for you kept you going. For a few minutes, there was nothing but grass and rocks, and abandoned houses. The sun was about to set and your phone battery was also depleting.

Just where the heck am I going?!

Just when you thought the journey was never going to end, in front of you appeared a small house and from the looks of the fresh laundry hanging outside the lawn, you knew it wasn’t abandoned. You then heard a loud crash inside and without wasting any second, ran towards the house and barged through the door.

Inside, the house was dark and there was a smell of something burning. “H-Hello?” Your voice echoed through the walls and you jumped when you heard a groan coming from the kitchen in front of you.

“C-Chanyeol is that you?” Your hands clutched your bag as you slowly walked towards the shuffling sounds with your trembling legs.

“Hae Ra..o-over here..”

The minute you heard his coarse voice, you dropped your bag and made a run for it. Your eyes widened when you found him crouching on the floor in front of a broken plate. Rice was scattered everywhere on the floor and there he was, struggling to stand.

“Oh my God, Chanyeol what happened?!”

You rushed to his side and put his arm over your shoulder before helping him up. God-knows-where you got the strength to lift and drag that giant out from the kitchen and into the living room. You gently helped him lie on the small couch. His legs were too long it dangled at the edge of the couch. You then examined his face which was as pale as a ghost. Placing your hand on his forehead, you found out that he was burning hot.

You rushed back into the kitchen, trying to find a clean towel and filled a basin with cold water. Running back out, you accidentally stepped on a broken piece of the shatter plate but that didn’t stop you from rushing back out to his side and soaking the towel in the basin before placing it over his forehead. A small smile formed on his lips and his breathing was heavy. You pushed away the strands of hair that was blocking his eyes and cupped his face, your eyes filled with tears.

“Thank you for coming.” He whispered before slowly closing his eyes and falling into a deep sleep. Your thumb rubbed circles on his face, examining it. He looked as though he didn’t sleep the whole night. The tired lines at the corners of his eyes and the dark circles under it just made your heart ache.

You wiped the tears from your eyes and took a deep breath.

At least he’s safe right?

You then felt the pain on your foot and was alarmed to see how bloody it was from the cut. Thank God you packed a first aid kit in your bag. You wiped the wound with some antiseptic and wrapped a bandage over it before standing up and examining the place.

It was a small house, no stairs or basement, but was neatly furnished with a few items like rugs, a coffee table, a small television and a few picture frames. You picked up one of them and discovered that it was the same picture Chanyeol had in his wallet; his family portrait. You also noticed how dusty it was. As a matter of fact, the whole place reeked of dust and there was still that burning smell. Since you didn’t have anything else to do while waiting for Chanyeol to wake up, you decided to clean the place.

Rolling up your sleeves and tying your hair into a small bun, you managed to find the cleaning supplies easily from the store beside the front door and began cleaning. You started with the living room. There were empty cans of coke, bottle and dirty clothes everywhere. Putting the rubbish in the trashbag, you collected the dirty clothes and headed into the kitchen, hoping the washing machine was located there.

You then worked on the kitchen, sweeping the broken pieces of glass and food on the floor first. You then found out the source of the burning smell. It was coming from one of the pots on the stove. It seemed that Chanyeol was trying to make himself some porridge but burnt it instead. You cleaned that mess up and once you were done with the kitchen and the small toilet beside it, you moved to the last room in the house; Chanyeol’s bedroom.

Surprisingly, it was clean, as if it was untouched for many days. Only a pile of dirty clothes on the floor and that was it. You took the dirty clothes into the kitchen again and placed them in the laundry basket, planning to wash them later when the first batch of laundry is done. You then remembered how Chanyeol attempted to cook porridge but couldn’t get a single bite. You thought hard. You’re not a bad cook yourself but you never really had a taste of cooking much back at your place. Looking around the kitchen for options, you then spotted a pink sticky note on the fridge. It was the only thing there. On it, coincidentally, was a recipe for chicken porridge. You furrowed your eyebrows.

But this isn’t Chanyeol’s handwriting…

You shook the thoughts out of your head. It wasn’t the time to be thinking about that. The recipe is right there, and it seemed simple enough. Chanyeol’s health was more important that a stupid handwriting. You quickly got started into making the chicken porridge. After about an hour, you managed to do it. The smell of chicken wafted through the air, drowning out the burnt smell from before.

“Smells nice…” You jumped when you heard Chanyeol’s voice from behind you.

“Hey you! You shouldn’t be up! Go back and rest!” You grabbed his arm and dragged him into the living room again and he was giggling but didn’t fight back. Instead, he heavily plopped onto the couch again and smiled at you.

You felt a blush creep up your cheeks and turned your back towards him. “I-I’ll get you some porridge so you just stay here. And I mean it! D-don’t move or I’ll kill you.” You said before disappearing into the kitchen. Chanyeol chuckled and nodded his head, but his eyes still followed your every movement.

With trembling hands, you brought a bowl of warm porridge out, along with a glass of water. You set them on the coffee table and before Chanyeol could reach out for it, you pushed him back down the couch again.

“S-stay. I’ll…feed it to you…” You bit your lip and sat down on the floor beside him while holding out the spoon towards his lips.

Instead of eating it, he just stared at you, causing your face to become even red.

“Will you please stop staring and eat this already?” You told him while avoiding his eyes.

Chanyeol chuckled. “I’m sorry, I was just…I can’t help it. I can’t believe you’re actually here, feeding me porridge.” He said before taking the spoon of warm porridge in his mouth.

You rolled your eyes but a small smile appeared on your lips. The both of you then kept quiet; you feeding him porridge and wiping the corners of his lips once in a while and him, just staring at you again even though you told him to stop. You didn’t mind actually. All you could think about was just how relieved you were to be with him at that moment.

He finished the whole bowl of porridge in minutes and you went to the kitchen to wash the dishes. While you were doing so, you felt something warm snake around your waist and jumped when you realized they were Chanyeol’s arms around you. Your hands completely froze and you almost dropped the bowl you were holding.

“W-what are you doing?” You lips trembled.

He breathed into your neck, which made the hair on your skin stand and rested his head in the crook of your neck. “Can we just stay like this for a while? I really need this right now.”

You tried to break free because the close contact was making your heart race but he doesn’t seem to let go. And in that moment, you sensed something was wrong. Still in his arms, you slowly twisted your body to face him and your heart broke when you saw the tears in his eyes. You cupped his face and he chuckled, letting a tear fall.

“Ah crap. I didn’t want you to see me in this state. I must look super uncool right now.” He joked.

You wiped his tears with the back of your hand. “When do you actually look cool?” You tried to cheer him up, which worked because he chuckled.

“Do you want to talk about it? I know I’m like, the last person anyone would want to talk to but, I’m actually a good listener.” You said.

He nodded and intertwined his fingers in yours before leading you to his room. The both of you sat comfortably on the bed; him sitting against the headboard and you positioned in between his legs and leaned against his chest. As much as how embarrassing the position you were in, it felt nice as he wrapped his arms around your chest, as though he was hugging a teddy bear.

“Okay, I believe you’re comfortable enough, seeing how you seem to be enjoying yourself having me being wrapped around your arms. What’s up?” You said.

He smiled and rubbed circles on your shoulders with his thumb. “I met my brother, Tao, last night. He told me to go back to China with him.”