My lips curved into a tiny smile as I tapped his contact and pressed my cellphone against my right ear. It took him only six seconds to answer my call. 

 

"Woke up?" He chuckled. 

 

"Yeah, um," I answered with a stupid grin on my face, "What's up?" 

 

Samdong laughed a bit, "Just wanted to check how you're doing after yesterday-"

 

"I.. I don't really want to talk about it," I cut him softly, "I'm sorry." 

 

"No, it's all fine," He returned, "Anyway, do you want to have lunch together later?" 

 

My smile beamed as soon as Samdong offered me lunch, "Of course!" I replied without hesitation, "You'll pick me up?" 

 

"Pick you up your ," Samdong scoffed and I frowned, "You know that the journey from your house to my office takes two hours right?" 

 

"You're exaggerating it." I rolled my eyes. 

 

Samdong chortled, "I am," he said, "Alright, I'll see you later." 

 

"Sure," I nodded, "Mwangdong right?" 

 

"Of course," he answered, "I love you." 

 

"I know," I laughed and when Samdong whined I said, "I love you too. See you later." 

 

I ended the call and let out a long exhale before telling myself that I should really take a bath since it was almost eight. My door bell rang when I was in the verge of drying my hair. It wasn't near lunch time yet so I was very sure it wasn't Samdong. And heck, Samdong didn't even want to pick me up. I switched off my hair dryer, and opened the front door, only to gasp with surprise when I realized who it was. 

 

"Hi," Sunggyu greeted me with an awkward smile, reminding me of the first time we met at school, "I... I want to apologize." 

 

"For calling me stupid?" I asked with a rather hostile tone which actually surprised me as well.

 

"And for leaving you like that yesterday." He nodded while bitting his lips. 

 

I was still utterly taken aback with everything that I didn't know how to respond Sunggyu. Should I tell him to go? Or should I invite him to come in? 

 

"Can I..." Sunggyu looked away, "I mean... I really have no idea how to mend things between us, Nara." 

 

I kept quiet and shook my head, "I don't even know what went wrong with us." 

 

"I'm sorry that I have disappointed you," Sunggyu said with his eyes gazing at my left hand - my engagement ring to be precise, "I know I should've taken your feelings into account too." 

 

I nodded and subtly slipped my left hand inside the pocket of my shorts although it was kinda awkward to be honest. 

 

"Look Nara, I do not have any confidence that we'll go like what we used to be in high school, but please give it a shot." 

 

"Sunggyu," I scoffed and shook my head, "You liked me back then, did you?" 

 

He gazed up and gave me a sad smile, "I did." 

 

"And I can't remember you fighting for me or confessing to me about it," I shrugged, "But now you're furious at me for, I don't know, getting engage?" 

 

"I regretted that-" 

 

"Oh, so this is the real reason why you're having this stupid 'cold war' with Myungsoo. Because you were jealous over him and not because you wanted to protect me!" I cried and leaned my body against the door frame, "You have no idea how much it hurts right now, Sunggyu." 

 

"I'm hurt too, Nara," he retorted, "To see you like this, it hurts me, and worse is that knowing that I am the cause." 

 

I scoffed, "Good. At least you know that," I gave him a glare, "Myungsoo had guts you know, he confessed to me. We dated. And what did you do? Run away to the States? Get drunk? Partied like crazy?-"

 

"Let's not bring that up." He told me sternly, getting emotional as well. 

 

"Oh, Sunggyu, there are tons of things I want to bring up right now," I shook my head, "And you were freaking here for the past two years, yet you didn't talk or at least gave me a call." 

 

"Okay, Nara, I get it!" He said and banged his clenched fist against the wall beside him which made me flinch, "I get it that I was too scared to tell you my feelings for you. I was a coward. But it was because I didn't want our friendship that we've built for years to end just like that or do you?" 

 

"You knew it was the right thing!" I shouted, after considering that my neighbors were all off for work, that was. 

 

Sunggyu opened his mouth, about to argue with me but he closed it again and sighed. 

 

"I didn't come here to have a fight with you," he said, "I just want to beg you for one chance, just one." 

 

"A chance for what, Sunggyu?" I asked him quietly and crossed my arms.

 

"For me to fix things with you." 

 

"Do you still have feelings for me?" I suspired. 

 

"Honestly," Sunggyu bit his lower lips and gazed down, "I don't know." 

 

"I can't..." I shook my head in frustration, "You know I'm committed to someone right now and this isn't right unless you make sure that all your feelings have vanished." 

 

"I only want to fix our relationship as best friends." 

 

"I... I-" 

 

I didn't know. I wanted us to go back like what we used to be. But then I thought about Samdong and how I'd feel if I was in his position. 

 

"I need time to think, Sunggyu." I finally replied softly. 

 

The male before me nodded his head and smiled a little, "I see." 

 

"If you don't have anything else to say-" 

 

"Yeah, I'll leave," He sighed, "Take care." 

 

"You too." 

 

 

~*~ 

 

 

It took me about a minute or two after Sunggyu left before I woke out of my reverie and went back inside my apartment. After closing the front door, I immediately slumped down and sat on the floor. I grunted and messed my hair. Why did it hurt so much? Every time I thought about Sunggyu it was like I was backtracking to the time when we were extremely close, and it hurt me so much to realize that time could ruin everything we had. 

 

It was eleven o'clock when I decided to continue my ongoing novel. As usual, I loose track of time until Samdong called me to remind me about our plan. I immediately changed my outfit and tied my hair effortlessly into a messy bun. I know, I probably looked as if I had not taken a bath yet, but you know me; I never really cared how I look and Samdong, although he always chuckled at my "fashion", how I dress didn't really matter for him. 

 

I drove to the Samdong's favorite restaurant at Mwangdong and he was already there waiting for me in his white shirt and jeans. He looked good, as always. 

 

"I wonder what you'd be without me." Samdong chuckled as I sat down beside him.

 

"What do you mean?" I frowned.

 

"Don't you realize that I've been your personal walking reminder all this time?" Samdong smirked and wrapped his arms around me. 

 

I laughed, "Well, I will give you credit for that." 

 

"Hm, I was expecting that," He said and I hit his arms playfully, "Anyway, something seems to be bothering you. What is it?"

 

I widened my eyes, still curious how he could see directly into me, "I... Bothering me?" 

 

"Is it Sunggyu?" 

 

And ta-da. He did it again; hitting the nail right on its head. 

 

"Yeah it's Sunggyu." I admitted without attempting to cover anything up. 

 

"What about him?" Samdong fixed his seating position as our steak and drinks were served. 

 

I was hesitant to talk about what had happened since I didn't want to feel the inevitable pain that would come every time I thought about Sunggyu, but again, me and Samdong promised each other to be honest in our relationship.

 

"He visited me this morning." I started and paused to watch his reaction.

 

Samdong nodded, "Really?" 

 

He smiled a bit and his face was calm, but I knew from the way he was tapping his left foot subtly on the floor that he was rather disturbed with this.

 

"Yeah," I answered without bothering to touch my food, "And he wanted to... You know, fix things." 

 

"Fix things like what?" Samdong asked again while he started to cut his meal. 

 

"Like how we used to be," I shrugged, "But... I don't know if I can really do this, you know." 

 

"And why is that?"

 

"Because he just confessed to me that he liked me before." 

 

Samdong literally almost choked on his food which I found quite amusing. He turned to me and frowned, "What?" 

 

"Yeah..." I bit my lower lips nervously, waiting a further respond from him. 

 

"W-well, does he still like you now?" He asked in a rather panicky manner.

 

"That's the problem," I answered, "He said he didn't know." 

 

The male beside me laughed a little and I was sure that he was confused and perhaps rather worried with the situation. 

 

"So this is like you asking for my permission if you can fix your relationship?" Samdong asked with a chuckle. 

 

"Kinda," I returned, "But if you're not okay with it, just so you know, I'm totally fine-"

 

"No, no, no," Samdong laughed and turned his head to me, "You know I trust you and I'd be fine with you hanging out with Sunggyu." 

 

"I also know you'd be jealous," I smirked, "No, really, if you don't feel comfortable with it, I won't let Sunggyu bother me - or us." 

 

"Nara," Samdong smiled sincerely, making his face even more good looking,"You know you gotta fix your relationship with Sunggyu." 

 

I sighed and squeezed his hand, "You sure?" 

 

"I trust you." 

 

 

~*~ 

 

 

Later that night, I was about to continue writing when my mind went back to Sunggyu. I sighed and took my cellphone, contemplating whether or not I should give him a call. 

 

After about six minutes of fiddling with my phone, I finally decided to give Sunggyu a shot. He picked it up immediately. 

 

"Nara?" 

 

"I was thinking about what you said this morning, Sunggyu." I said, trying to overcome my anxiety.

 

"And?" 

 

"I think I'd like to give it a shot." 

 

Sunggyu was silent for a few moment, making me even more anxious, before saying, "Thank you." 

 

~*~