The Requiem by KangminBread
VᴇʀꜱᴀEᴍᴇʀɢᴇ ʀᴇᴠɪᴇᴡ ꜱʜᴏᴘ。 — busy!
The Requiem by kangminbread
title
So I googled the word 'Requiem' and yeah, I can say the title fits just from first glance. It stated that it was a "Mass for the repose of the souls of the dead" and just from glancing at some things, I feel like this definition can be put to the story. The title is fairly eye-catching for someone like myself who seemingly likes more darker concepts. So really, I have little to no complaints about the title. Good job!
description/foreword
First thing I noticed is that the word 'Requiem' is spelled as 'Requien' and I just couldn't tell if that was intentional or not--but I thought I'd point it out regardless, just in case. If it was intentional, just ignore me--anyways.
I really like the description, especially when it talks about how people are blessed and cursed with the gift of Eternity. One thing I also wanted to mention, which is me purely being a stickler, is that with "promise of eternity", the first time, the e in eternity isn't capitalized like it is the second time (again, I'm just being a stickler at this point).
Besides me being a complete stickler, I think you have a really good description. I love the vibe it gives off, as well, and looking at how this story seems to be based, with supernatural and all, I think it's fair to say the description fits!
When it comes to the foreword, looking at that, I was immediately blank. My brain completely stopped and had a "waht" moment (yes, I spelled what as 'waht' just 'cause it sounds funnier in my head--i'm sORry). There's seemingly a lot of characters and I feel like I just got smacked in the face asfhgfdg. I won't talk too much about characters here, mainly cause this isn't the section for that, but hoo boy. There's a lot. But yeah, there's really nothing wrong with the foreword either. Both are just fine as is!
plot
Just a weird little fyi, I don't know if it's like this because I'm not subscribed (doesn't seem to be since the other chapters are fine) but chapter 5, Tweede Lied - Second Chord, the text is black on red. I couldn't read it at all--I had to kind of squint and it kind of hurt my delicate eyes--so I just kinda breezed through that chapter. The next chapter, and the other ones I looked at, had white text so I don't know what happened there.
Moving on, the story is actually pretty good. Granted I'm not reading all of those chapters, holy hell help me if I tried. I would end up dying because wowza, das a huge (I'm sorry, I feel loopy writing this HAHAH). Real talk though, you've put a lot of time into this story and I can tell off the bat. And with that many chapters? I'm amazed. I mean you're still updating this and it started in 2013, THAT is dedication and I 100% support this.
The plot itself seems interesting but, I will admit, I am a little lost. I don't know if it's because I feel like I'm half asleep or because there's just so much to this story (which is NOT a bad thing!). I've read up to chapter 7, the supposed end of Tweede Lied, because I felt like that was a good enough place to stop since there's already a lot happening in the story. Plus, I liked the story about Leeteuk and Heechul, and Zhoumi really, so I thought I'd stop it there.
Something I found interesting is how they used the vampire blood on Zhoumi to try and keep him alive and when he didn't drink the blood for a certain amount of time, he'd start showing rapid signs of age. I've read a few vampire related things and not many of them use a concept like that one so I liked the idea of it (even though that seems a little gross). I just thought that was something interesting you included, especially since they 'adopted' him into the family despite him being a human.
Now, I'm sure there's a lot more to the plot then just Heechul and Leeteuk alone, especially with the large amount of characters that were listed, but I'm not, sadly, going to get to all of those. And, because of that, I might be missing a lot of the plot and the real purpose of it. I remember Leeteuk saying, when he made the deal with Heechul, that if he helped him become free, then he'd be free, or something but I really like the bond the two of them have created (or three if you consider them plus Zhoumi). I think you did a good job at showing how powerful the vampires can be, in terms of fighting and/or killing other vampires or in general, and how they can create bonds with each other.
writing style/flow
So, while reading a few chapters, I noticed that some of the text of dialogue from two different characters were in the same paragraph. There were paragraphs where both Heechul and Leeteuk would talk and it can get confusing on who is talking. The way I look at it, and call it, is the "One character per paragraph" rule. If one character speaks, then another one does, they should be seperated paragraphs. There were definitely times where I got confused on who was talking because more than one person talked per praragraph.
Besides that though, the story's writing style is pretty good.
I didn't really have much complaints about the flow either. Sure, it time skips and such but with a story like this, it's kind of necessary. Plus, as I said before, there's a lot to this story, so not much to criticize on time skips. While the plot did confuse me here and there, the flow was something I personally could keep up with.
characterization
When it comes to stories having a lot of OCs, I tend to get lost. I kind of did get lost in this story, mainly cause I wasn't sure where the OCs kept coming from. With a story like this, though, it makes sense to have OCs, or just other idols in general, so there would be a lot of characters regardless. But 'tis all good, so I'll start off with Heechul and Leeteuk!
Heechul and Leeteuk, starts off pretty typical between these two in these kinds of stories. Heechul is pretty much left for dead, Leeteuk 'saves' him, and they become a bit of a duo. Heechul wants freedom and Leeteuk does too, something like that. Though, they want freedom in different ways from different people. I think the friendship they develop from being together so long is pretty good and I think you developed it well. Especially when Zhoumi comes into the picture, they seemingly raise him well. Sure, the whole half-vampire thing happens but I found that seemingly normal considering they literally 'raised' him.
Since these three are really the only characters I encountered, I can't write much, if anything, about the other ones because I haven't seen/learned enough about them yet. I think you did a good job with Leeteuk and Heechul, though. That's for sure.
personal enjoyment
I enjoyed it more than I thought I would. While the vampire concept is pretty overdone, it is pretty fun to write/read. Your story is fairly unique from what I've seen on this website too. I might have finished it if I had time and if it wasn't so long. But honestly, as I said, the dedication you have is admirable. I'd given up long ago if I were you so really, good on you!
total of [0/0]
others: No grade given. // I feel like this was super scattered in terms of my thoughts and if it is, I APOLOGIZE. This took me longer than expected mainly because A. I'm lazy and B. I've been suffering from mouth pain all day and I hatE it. Anyways, If you have any questions or need clarification on my rambling self, please let me know cause I really do feel like this is SO scatterbrained.
So I googled the word 'Requiem' and yeah, I can say the title fits just from first glance. It stated that it was a "Mass for the repose of the souls of the dead" and just from glancing at some things, I feel like this definition can be put to the story. The title is fairly eye-catching for someone like myself who seemingly likes more darker concepts. So really, I have little to no complaints about the title. Good job!
description/foreword
First thing I noticed is that the word 'Requiem' is spelled as 'Requien' and I just couldn't tell if that was intentional or not--but I thought I'd point it out regardless, just in case. If it was intentional, just ignore me--anyways.
I really like the description, especially when it talks about how people are blessed and cursed with the gift of Eternity. One thing I also wanted to mention, which is me purely being a stickler, is that with "promise of eternity", the first time, the e in eternity isn't capitalized like it is the second time (again, I'm just being a stickler at this point).
Besides me being a complete stickler, I think you have a really good description. I love the vibe it gives off, as well, and looking at how this story seems to be based, with supernatural and all, I think it's fair to say the description fits!
When it comes to the foreword, looking at that, I was immediately blank. My brain completely stopped and had a "waht" moment (yes, I spelled what as 'waht' just 'cause it sounds funnier in my head--i'm sORry). There's seemingly a lot of characters and I feel like I just got smacked in the face asfhgfdg. I won't talk too much about characters here, mainly cause this isn't the section for that, but hoo boy. There's a lot. But yeah, there's really nothing wrong with the foreword either. Both are just fine as is!
plot
Just a weird little fyi, I don't know if it's like this because I'm not subscribed (doesn't seem to be since the other chapters are fine) but chapter 5, Tweede Lied - Second Chord, the text is black on red. I couldn't read it at all--I had to kind of squint and it kind of hurt my delicate eyes--so I just kinda breezed through that chapter. The next chapter, and the other ones I looked at, had white text so I don't know what happened there.
Moving on, the story is actually pretty good. Granted I'm not reading all of those chapters, holy hell help me if I tried. I would end up dying because wowza, das a huge (I'm sorry, I feel loopy writing this HAHAH). Real talk though, you've put a lot of time into this story and I can tell off the bat. And with that many chapters? I'm amazed. I mean you're still updating this and it started in 2013, THAT is dedication and I 100% support this.
The plot itself seems interesting but, I will admit, I am a little lost. I don't know if it's because I feel like I'm half asleep or because there's just so much to this story (which is NOT a bad thing!). I've read up to chapter 7, the supposed end of Tweede Lied, because I felt like that was a good enough place to stop since there's already a lot happening in the story. Plus, I liked the story about Leeteuk and Heechul, and Zhoumi really, so I thought I'd stop it there.
Something I found interesting is how they used the vampire blood on Zhoumi to try and keep him alive and when he didn't drink the blood for a certain amount of time, he'd start showing rapid signs of age. I've read a few vampire related things and not many of them use a concept like that one so I liked the idea of it (even though that seems a little gross). I just thought that was something interesting you included, especially since they 'adopted' him into the family despite him being a human.
Now, I'm sure there's a lot more to the plot then just Heechul and Leeteuk alone, especially with the large amount of characters that were listed, but I'm not, sadly, going to get to all of those. And, because of that, I might be missing a lot of the plot and the real purpose of it. I remember Leeteuk saying, when he made the deal with Heechul, that if he helped him become free, then he'd be free, or something but I really like the bond the two of them have created (or three if you consider them plus Zhoumi). I think you did a good job at showing how powerful the vampires can be, in terms of fighting and/or killing other vampires or in general, and how they can create bonds with each other.
writing style/flow
So, while reading a few chapters, I noticed that some of the text of dialogue from two different characters were in the same paragraph. There were paragraphs where both Heechul and Leeteuk would talk and it can get confusing on who is talking. The way I look at it, and call it, is the "One character per paragraph" rule. If one character speaks, then another one does, they should be seperated paragraphs. There were definitely times where I got confused on who was talking because more than one person talked per praragraph.
Besides that though, the story's writing style is pretty good.
I didn't really have much complaints about the flow either. Sure, it time skips and such but with a story like this, it's kind of necessary. Plus, as I said before, there's a lot to this story, so not much to criticize on time skips. While the plot did confuse me here and there, the flow was something I personally could keep up with.
characterization
When it comes to stories having a lot of OCs, I tend to get lost. I kind of did get lost in this story, mainly cause I wasn't sure where the OCs kept coming from. With a story like this, though, it makes sense to have OCs, or just other idols in general, so there would be a lot of characters regardless. But 'tis all good, so I'll start off with Heechul and Leeteuk!
Heechul and Leeteuk, starts off pretty typical between these two in these kinds of stories. Heechul is pretty much left for dead, Leeteuk 'saves' him, and they become a bit of a duo. Heechul wants freedom and Leeteuk does too, something like that. Though, they want freedom in different ways from different people. I think the friendship they develop from being together so long is pretty good and I think you developed it well. Especially when Zhoumi comes into the picture, they seemingly raise him well. Sure, the whole half-vampire thing happens but I found that seemingly normal considering they literally 'raised' him.
Since these three are really the only characters I encountered, I can't write much, if anything, about the other ones because I haven't seen/learned enough about them yet. I think you did a good job with Leeteuk and Heechul, though. That's for sure.
personal enjoyment
I enjoyed it more than I thought I would. While the vampire concept is pretty overdone, it is pretty fun to write/read. Your story is fairly unique from what I've seen on this website too. I might have finished it if I had time and if it wasn't so long. But honestly, as I said, the dedication you have is admirable. I'd given up long ago if I were you so really, good on you!
total of [0/0]
others: No grade given. // I feel like this was super scattered in terms of my thoughts and if it is, I APOLOGIZE. This took me longer than expected mainly because A. I'm lazy and B. I've been suffering from mouth pain all day and I hatE it. Anyways, If you have any questions or need clarification on my rambling self, please let me know cause I really do feel like this is SO scatterbrained.
With school starting back up again soon, I probably won't be doing many reviews, if at all. We'll see about it though. Thank you for everyone who has requested so far and over the years, I've really learned a lot from reviewing stories and shiz. ♥
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