Finally I finished moving. Thank God Joonmyeon offered to help. I actually had a good time there, moving boxes, sweating more than I had thought I would (embarrassing alert). I took a shower, I put things in the right place, we could say that the operation ‘Moving’ was done.  I was exhausted, so I went to bed (new quilt and bed sheets, yay!) and the tv.

But not too long later I began thinking of Chanyeol, and our movie marathons. I sighed and went to grab something to eat. But then again, beautiful and gracious Byul, I had forgotten to buy food. What do we have, then? My mother’s spicy as hell beef, herbal tea and aged kimbap. Way to go. I checked my phone and I had a few messages from him. I gasped, and just read the last one.

‘Call me as soon as you read this. – Yeollie’

‘Yeollie’, I repeated shaking my head and called him.

- Where are you at? – He asked as soon as he picked up

- I’m home. You?

- No you’re not home. You’re not here

- Ok – I said. Why are you still doing this, Chanyeol?

- Where are you?

- I’m telling you, I’m in bed, in my apartment.

- Text me the address.

- Why? That’s not the point of me coming to live here.

- Don’t be silly. Text it!  - He hung up.

And yet here I am, stupid Byul. I texted him my address and he showed up about half an hour later.

- How was the moving? – He asked, putting a box on my counter

- Normal. Heavy stuff, I’m dead tired – I answered honestly

‘I got you something that you will love!’, he said happily, handing me a slightly heavy box.

- Are you giving me your ferret? – I asked him

- Yes. Isn’t it a great present?

I looked at him, squinting my eyes. Then I remembered that Hana has always hated ferrets. And I got angry.

- Go give that pet to someone else. And if you are getting rid of it, at least be honest enough. Why did you buy a ferret when you know that Hana hates them? – I asked

- I didn’t know. She said she loved them until I got home with this one and named it Byul, and then she got real mad and I guess today was the last day she could stand it. – He said with a sad face – But I know that you like them, and now that you are back…

I sighed and returned the box to him. ‘Chanyeol, don’t be like this. If you are here just to give me the pet you obviously didn’t but consciously, I’m afraid I’m no animal shelter’, I told him, and he began pouting. I opened my mouth to keep ranting but then someone knocked the door.

And one more time, thank God, it was my neighbor. With pizza.  ‘Oh’, he said when he saw Chanyeol holding a box with a big bow. ‘I think this a bad time. I brought you this because I noticed you hadn’t bought anything to eat, and I supposed you’d be hungry by now… ‘, he began bowing and talking, keeping his head down. Chanyeol looked at me like asking who he was.

- You are not interrupting anything – I told him – And I do like pizza. Thank you! – I smiled, and Joonmyeon sighed in relief, handing me a box that I did want to receive.

- Who’s this? – Asked Chanyeol with a straight face

- I’m Kim Joonmyeon – He said stretching Chanyeol’s hand – I’m her neighbor. I helped her with the moving man, you should have been here. You should help your girlfriend when she has to do something that requires strength.

- I’m… - Began Chanyeol blushing

- He’s not my boyfriend – I hurried to clear up – He’s just a friend.

- Still – Continued Joonmyeon – You should have been here this morning.

Chanyeol opened his mouth but I cut him off. ‘I think you should leave, Chanyeol. I’m tired, and as you can see, my neighbor just brought a huge pizza for us to eat.’ Joonmyeon nodded and Chanyeol sighed and went to the door, letting Joonmyeon enter my place. ‘I’ll call you tomorrow’ said he, and I shrugged. ‘Use tomorrow to figure out where you are going to leave that ferret’, I smiled and waved at him, closing the door.

Joonmyeon stared at me a little bit puzzled, until I smiled at him and signaled him to take off his shoes, while I left to the kitchen to get the plates to serve the pizza. ‘He’s the one who made you cry yesterday, right?’, he asked while helping me to serve. I shook my head and chuckled, but he gave me a serious look. ‘You don’t need to deny it, Byul. I’m not stupid’, he said softly. ‘He’s the one who made you come here too, right?’, he continued. I sighed and nodded.

- Well, I’m nobody to ask you why you let him in, because you must have your reasons. So I’m sorry I interrupted with the pizza. I thought you were alone. Next time I will call you beforehand. 

- Don’t worry, really – I assured him while taking a slice on my hands – I wouldn’t have let you in if I wasn’t willing to spend some time here. Plus, you helped me so much today, that I should be the one buying you food!

- Let’s say this is my welcoming gift. – He smiled.

We finished the pizza and then Joonmyeon left. ‘You had a long and tiring day. I will let you sleep. But you will have to let me take you grocery shopping tomorrow. You are new to the neighborhood so I will show you the best places’, he offered. ‘Please don’t worry so much about me’, I asked him. ‘I need to learn how to live alone again’. He laughed and shook his head. ‘Hey, don’t be silly. You live alone. I have no other interest but to make your life here easier. So don’t try to reject me. Goodnight, Byul.’

- Goodnight, Joonmyeon – I said softly, and closed the door after he left.

I took another deep breath and went back to my bed. I checked my phone again and there was a new message from Chanyeol. ‘I don’t want to lose you’, it said. I felt my eyes watering again, and one single tear streamed down my face. But only one: Joonmyeon had already seen me with swollen eyes and I was not going to let that happen.

Joonmyeon? No, I was not going to let that happen because I’ve had enough in such a short time. I took my phone and answered: ‘Shouldn’t you be more careful with who you message? I don’t want to start receiving threats by her. Take care, Yeollie’. A while later, he answered. ‘You called me Yeollie, you still love me haha’. I gasped and buried my head in the covers. Jesus Christ.

Next morning, I woke up starving. Nothing in the fridge, remember, Park Byul? I found a note under my door. It read: ‘I didn’t ask for your number. You were so tired tonight that I didn’t want to bother you more. Call me when you want to buy food. You don’t have anything for breakfast! – Joonmyeon (the sociopath)’, and under that his phone number. I smiled, and dialed him, but the answering machine took my call. ‘Hi’, I began ‘You put your number here and asked me to call you when I wanted to go out… and uh… I am going out now so… yes. Thank you!’, and I hung up. I turned up my cell phone right after, because I had the feeling that Chanyeol would call me again. Right after I did, Joonmyeon knocked.

- I hope you like mandu – He smiled – I was out buying this for you and I couldn’t pick up. I will go back to my place for a shower and then I’ll take you, alright? Enjoy! – He smiled

I tried to thank him but he just turned to go for his shower. I smiled to myself and went inside to eat the mandu with some herbal tea.

A week after my arrival in Seoul, to get Chanyeol back to me, a week after my massive failure because he was already dating the one he said he didn’t like.

A week after all of that, I could finally feel that I was just starting to be the owner of my life again.

Little by litte.

Like 1/100. Pretty much nothing, but the crying indexes have gone considerably low.

But I can get better.

You go Byul! (You better)