Chapter VII: Too Much Confusion

Opening my eyes and stretching my arms after that long deep sleep I had, my body felt so light that I can’t even remember when I last became relaxed like this after all the stress Ive been having. But then, I quickly sat up as I realized I was in my room, looking at its familiar interior and the memory about what happened before I dozed off to dreamland entered my mind.

“If only Boa unni is here…”

Who exactly is she?

My curiosity struck me and I planned to ask Liyin unni about that unni she uttered earlier. As I glanced outside the window, it made me assume that I slept for several hours seeing that it was already dark outside. I climbed out of my bed and headed towards where Liyin unni is but at that same moment my stomach grumbled.

“Dinner! I wonder if appa’s home?” I made a run towards the door but immediately stopped when a sudden thought came rushing in my mind. What if appa’s mad at me for shouting at that woman? Ooh~ This is bad. This is really really bad. Should I come down and face appa or should I just stay here and sleep some more? But I’m so hungry! Argh! I hate you stomach!

But since I was craving for a delicious meal my unni or appa prepared, I decided to take the risk by going to the kitchen but even before I made a step down the staircase, I heard voices of both of them and it seemed as if they’re fighting? Oh no...

“For heaven’s sake oppa, don’t you realize? You’re just hurting Sofi!” Unni yelled with irritation in her voice.

“No. I am not! I’m doing this for Sofi so please Liyin, can you not argue with me?!” Appa reasoned out and I became confused. What are they talking about? Appa is doing something and that something is hurting me? What? I…I don’t understand.

“I’m not arguing with you, I’m just concerned about her sake! Wake up oppa, we both know you don’t like Hyo Joo but why aren’t you doing anything?!” After hearing that name, I clenched my fists. So this is about her? That something is her? But why appa? You are doing this because…because you want to hurt me? Don’t you love me at all? I bit my lip to prevent myself from crying and shook my head to erase my thought. No, this isn’t true. I know for a fact that my appa really loves me…Does he?

“I don’t have any choice!” Appa answered and I sat on the tiled floor, feeling a sting in my heart. 

“What?! You can tell appa that you don’t want to be with her” Harabeoji…oh right. Jaejoong appa is forced to be with that woman because of harabeoji. But why didn’t he disapprove of it? Does this means that…that he likes Hyo Joo?...No! This can’t be!

“And how about Boa unni, huh?” Liyin unni continued followed by a loud sound of a glass that broke into pieces.

“Shut up Liyin! Shut up! Now go to your room and leave me alone!” My appa shouted and I was shocked. I had never imagined he could say that to unni as I felt scared of what will happen next.

“Fine! If that’s what you want, I’ll leave!” Unni replied and I saw her running upstairs with face soaked with tears.

“Unni…” I called but she just ignored me until she entered her room, shutting the door with a bang.

“Sofi?” I turned to my right and saw my appa with a guilt look on his face.

“Appa, I’m sorry” I grabbed his hand and looked straight to his eyes. I know I’m mad at him for still being with Hyo Joo but then I realized I felt like that because my only basis is my feelings towards the two of them being together and not really understanding his side. I should view things holistically and not be so impulsive…but can I really do that next time? Or is it inevitable to be like that for a child like me?

“Why are you apologizing baby girl?” He lifted me up and wiped the tears that managed to come out from my eyes.

“Because of what I did this morning and…because you and unni are fighting” I looked down then hugged him for being sorry. He was about to speak but at the same time, unni’s door opened, showing her with a large bag hanging on her shoulder.

“Where are you going?” My appa asked with a stern voice but it’s as if unni didn’t hear him, instead she quickly ran downstairs and towards the front door.

“Yah! Kim Liyin! Come back here!” My appa put me down and rushed towards my unni and I followed suit. I managed to catch the two just in front of the main door as appa was gripping unni’s arm. “You’re not going anywhere, go back to your room”

“Why would I?” Unni snapped having a deadpan expression on her face and I saw appa that he was surprised at first but became annoyed afterwards.   

“Because I’m your brother!”

“And I’m your sister!”

“Don’t start with me Liyin. I said go back to your room! Why aren’t you listening to me?!”

“Because you’re not listening to me!”

“Aish! You know what? Fine! Leave! And don’t ever come back again!”

“Fine!”

“Unni!” I chased her only to be blocked by my appa. “Appa, let go of me! I want to go to Liyin unni!”

“No” He stated and I kept on removing his hands off my arms but he carried me to the kitchen after double locking the door.

“Sofi, I’m sorry. Appa is sorry. I shouldn’t have said that to Liyin” He knelt in front of me and hugged me tight while I cried and cried.

“I want to see Liyin unni, appa. She might be in danger if we don’t find her” I told him and my eyes widen when he faced me and I saw tears in his eyes.

“Don’t worry baby girl. I know where she gone off to” He caressed my cheek and gave a sad smile while I deeply sighed, knowing that appa is also in pain and doesn’t want to be in this situation at all. If only we are a complete family then nothing like this will ever occur.

“Stay here while I cook dinner” He instructed and I remained quiet until he finished the preparations.

Appa sat down and we’re about to eat when the phone suddenly rang. He went to the living room and I followed him, wondering if the caller would be unni.  

“Can you let her stay there for tonight? I will go there tomorrow…..Yes….Yes, I will bring Sofi. Okay, goodnight. Sorry, I’ll tell you later. Bye” He put the phone down and I tugged on his shirt.

“Who’s that appa? You know where unni is? Where is she?”

“Don’t worry baby girl, she’s in Yunho’s house and we’ll go there tomorrow. For now, let’s eat. I know you’re hungry” And the smiling Jaejoong appa came back…or is he just faking that smile?

“Appa?” I managed to call after contemplating to ask him about my queries but when he looked at me, waiting for me to continue, I used all the courage I have to ask him three questions about our situation.

“Do you love me?” I slowly looked up to meet his eyes, afraid that he will answer no but I saw a softened look on him as he crouched down to my level.

“Of course I love my daughter” He patted my head and continued. “You’re very precious to me baby girl. Please promise appa, you won’t ever leave me”

“I promise I will always be with you appa” I grinned, hearing what he said but it faded away soon when I thought of my second question.

“Appa?”

“Yes?”

“Do you…Do you love Hyo Joo?” Appa stiffened for a while as my heart was beating so fast. I don’t know how I voiced that out when I am so afraid to hear his answer.

“Will you accept her if I say yes?” His answer echoed on my mind, processing what he just said. Does this means, he really loves her? Or appa just wanted to know my reaction? Gaah~

“I’m sorry Sofi, I can’t let her go…because I don’t want you to leave me”

I was dumbfounded. I really didn’t get the real meaning of what he just told me. And why would I leave him when I just promised to stay with him?

“Appa, what are you talking a-”

“I’m really sorry Sofi. I’ll tell you when the right time comes. For now, you shouldn’t be thinking these things, just enjoy life like every child does”

“But appa…”

“No buts, c’mon, let’s eat” He held my hand and pulled me towards the dining area but I also pulled him at the opposite direction to earn his attention once more.

“Sofi?”

“Just one more question appa…

Who’s Boa?”

***

A/N I’m back! (yuichi here) Not a happy chapter, ne? I’m sorry, soon it will be (I think XD) and this is a short chap (for me it is XD) What do you think will be Jaejoong appa’s answer? Hmm…

Some of you asked me if I’m back for good after that 8 months with no updates with this story, the reason is…I’m lazy lol I couldn’t even believe myself that I wasn’t able to post chapters during those months (well, I guess it’s because I was updating my other stories hehe).

I’ll try to update Sofi’s story as much as I could but I’m not promising that I can post chapters fast since I am now working and I’m only free on weekends.

But do continue to support and read this story…and also comment! Hahaha!!!

To CinqLuna, FolderName, HyeMean, haibara_214, cloud4two, kyuhyn1004, and DearIC,

I’ll try to update and not to be lazy XD Thank you gals, you are the best!!!!

And to all my subscribers! Thank you ^u^

Love lots,

Sofi and yuichi