Warning : Long chapter

“Hyung”

“Tao, not now. Just tell Kris if you need dinner, he’ll make it for you”

“Hyung~ Please, I don’t want dinner, Hyung”

Baekhyun sighed and put his music sheets down, “What do you need, baby? I’m sorry, I’m just stressed because I cannot get this note right”, he said, unplugging the earphones from his ears.

“Can we like go to your room? Is Chanyeol Hyung there?”

“Ah, honestly I don’t know where Channie is, he just disappeared, maybe he told me where he’s going but I just wasn’t paying attention, he was with Kyungsoo and Joonmyeon hyung though.”

“So? Can we go to your room? This is kind of private, Hyung, I don’t want anyone to hear it”, Tao said, biting his fingernails, a thing he only did when he’s with Baekhyun.

Baekhyun smiled and pulled Tao’s fingers from his mouth, “Stop copying your Hyung that’s a bad habit. Okay, let’s go to my room”

Baekhyun stood up, dusting his trousers and Tao followed, fidgeted nervously behind Baekhyun.

Inside, Baekhyun motioned Tao to sit on the couch. Wow, since when did Baekhyun and Chanyeol Hyung have couch inside their room?

Baekhyun chuckled slightly,”You must be wondering about the couch right? Well, me and Channie bought it on our anniversary last year”

“That is so sweet, Hyung. It must be very nice around here and spending time with you guys.”

“Yes, it’s nice here but it was never complete without our other half”, Baekhyun sat and pulled Tao’s arm so he was sitting beside Baekhyun.

Tao was about to cry again, so Baekhyun patted his head, “So, what is it that you want to tell me about? Spill it all out to your beef brother!”

“It’s…about Kris Gege and Sehun…”, Tao’s voice was so little and sounded really vulnerable. Baekhyun gasped, this was really, really serious and so important to the little panda.

“Go on, baby. Hyung will listen”

So Tao told everything to Baekhyun, every single detail from the very beginning since Kris left to Canada, what happened when he was away, Sehun found him crying alone at night, Sehun comforting him, even some things happened between them before they debuted, and he told Baekhyun how he found Sehun and Luhan kissing that morning and he sort of broke up with Sehun even that they weren’t even dating, how he and Kris got back together and the confusions he felt on his date with Kris, he also told Baekhyun about his delusion at the beach.

Baekhyun wiped his eyes, they couldn’t help but water, it was heartbreaking, it must be very hard for the maknae to handle, he was so sensitive, so delicate.

“Tao baby…”

Tao sobbed in return, tears were already falling on his cheeks like waterfalls when he told the story to Baekhyun.

“I feel so guilty, Hyung. It’s like as if it was my entire fault, if only I could wait just a little bit longer, if only I were stronger, if I weren’t that weak! All those things would not happen! Kris Gege, his eyes were so sad! They were so sad, it broke my heart… How could I do this Hyung? And Sehun…h-he was hurting too, Hyung! And especially Luhan hyung, it was lik—“

“Tao, please. It’s nobody’s fault, okay? It’s fate, baby. God wanted this to happen so He made the fate. You know Tao, God would never give you a test if you’re not strong enough to face it.”. Baekhyun Tao’s face gently, wiping the bangs away from his redden face. He laughed, “I’m not trying to be all religious here. I just want you to believe in yourself and not breaking down like this.”

“It’s just… I don’t know what to do, Hyung.”

“Give Kris another chance. That’s what you said to him, right? To give him another chance. You didn’t give him the chance on your date today.”

“I tri—“

“No, you didn’t, dear. When you’re with him, try to feel his presence. When he looks at you, try to look inside his eyes, and try to see the feeling. When he touches you, try to feel his gentleness. Didn’t you say that he’s the gentlest person you’ve ever met? Try, baby. Try.”

Tao smiled and nodded. He really wanted to try, he wanted to love Kris again, he wanted to feel safe in Kris’ arms again. Even when fans hated him for being close to Kris, Kris would always—

No, it wasn’t Kris, it was Sehun who made him happy at those times, Kris did nothing to—

“Tao, I know what you’re thinking. Stop it. Erase everything but Kris. I’m not forcing to love Kris, I just want you to try okay? If not, you can try with Sehun then, if with Sehun feels more right than you are with Kris, you both can consult with Luhan and Kris.”

“Hyung, how could I ever thank you?”

“You don’t need to thank me now. Thank me when the whole problem is done. Now, off you go to Kris! Tomorrow’s your birthday, look at all those piles of gifts and cakes for you at SM building! You should be smiling and happy happy happy! Not gloomy and sad like this!”, Baekhyun said as he punched Tao’s arm lightly.

Tao smiled at his cute Hyung, Baekhyun is indeed the best person in the world. But no, fans! I would never like him that way. He’s my special beef brother and he forever belongs to Chanyeol Hyung.

“Now off you go to Kris. Hush hush! Chanyeol will be here in 3 minutes. I don’t want him accusing me of cheating again”

“Sir, Yes Sir!”. Tao stood up and did the salute before running to make dinner for him and Kris.

-----

“Look who’s here with dinner~”, Tao cooed as he opened his and Kris’ room door.

“Ah, Taozi. You bring dinner to our room? You know I don’t allow that”, Kris smiled playfully, walking towards Tao giving him a peck on the lips.

Tao dodged the kiss and pouted, “So you don’t want the dinner? Okay then, I’ll just eat it with—“

“No, no! I want them!”, Kris half yelled, taking the plates from Tao’s hands and putting them on the nightstand.

Tao smirked,”I thought you didn’t want them?”

“I was joking, baby. I want them, you made them, right?”

“Maybe~”

“Aw, baby, come on don’t be angry I was only joking”

Tao giggled a little, which made Kris smiled and the younger’s hair.

“How many times today I said that you’re adorable?”

“That was the first time actually, Gege”, Tao stuck his tongue out at Kris.

“Tao, don’t do that”

“Don’t do what?”

“Don’t stick your tongue out”

“Why? It’s my tongue, I can do what I want with—mmpphh”

Tao was silenced with a pair of lips on his, which was no other than Kris’

Kris pulled away quickly and hugged his lover. “That makes me want to kiss you so bad”

Tao pulled back a bit and looked deeply into Kris’ eyes, “Then what’s stopping you?”. Tao circled his arms around Kris’ neck and kissed the taller. Kris closed his eyes when he felt Tao’s soft thin lips touched his own.

Their lips moved slowly against each other, making soft sounds in the silence of the room. Tao hummed when he felt Kris poking his tongue slowly, asking the younger to open his mouth. Wanting to feel more of Kris, he allowed the other to enter his tongue to his mouth. Shivered at the first contact after more than 6 months, Tao hugged Kris closer so he could feel his warmth. Kris ran his hands up and down Tao’s back, sometimes gripping harder when Tao’s tongue touched the sensitive part of his cavern. He lifted Tao’s shirt slightly so he could feel Tao’s warm skin against his hands.

“Zitao Hyung?”

Kris and Tao gasped, stumbling away from each other awkwardly. Kris glared at the door, the only person that called his Taozi with ‘Hyung’ is that jerk.

“Hyung, have you eaten dinner already?”

“Umm… Uh…”, Tao stuttered.

“Hyung are you alright in there? Are you sick? Do you want me to bring you food?”

“No, Sehun! I’m alright! You go finish your dinner! I’m eating mine inside here”

“With me”, Kris added. “Now get lost”

Sehun cleared his throat. “Okay, have a nice night, Hyung”. And they could hear footsteps leaving the room.

Tao drooped his head, tried to hold back the uncomfortable feeling.

“Tao, baby”

“Yifan, I’m sorry…”

“Tao—“

“This is all my fault! All my fault!”. He covered his face with his hands, blocking small sobbing sounds escaping his mouths.

Kris scooted closer to his beloved, rubbing circles on his back trying his best to calm Tao down.

“Baby, you know it’s not y—“

“No, Kris, okay? This is all my fault. If only I was stronger, if only I wasn’t this pathetic and spineless, all of this wouldn’t have happened. We could still be happy, everyone would still be happy. Sehun wouldn’t have to be sad, you wouldn’t need to hold yourself back from loving me, Luhan Ge wouldn’t need to feel so lonely. I hate myself, Ge! I hate myself! I am so wrong!”

“Huang Zi Tao, listen. This was never your fault remember? It was all mine! I started all this mess, I should have contacted you—“

“Yes! That part was your fault. But I should’ve called you, Yifan! I should’ve texted you or something instead of crying like an idiot at night. Or I should’ve locked the door or kicked Sehun out when he entered the room. I should’ve guarded my heart better. Th-this… all of this…”

Tao choked slightly. Kris hugged the young boy, he really hate it when he see Tao cried.

“You know, Yifan. I really want to love you, I miss this feeling of being happy whenever I’m with you, I miss this feeling of being safe around you, I miss them Yifan. But everytime… everytime those feeling are starting to come back. I would—I would see images of Sehun at the back of my mind, looking at me with sad eyes, or just simply waving at me. What’s wrong with me, Yifan? Tell me! Have I gone mad?!”

Tao’s cheeks were really wet and his eyes were swollen, his nose was really red and it seemed that breathing was so hard for him. The feeling was suffocating, and it hurt him more that he had to say those things directly to Kris. But he really felt that Kris needed to know what he was feeling, what was holding him back from loving the leader again.

“I loved you…”, Tao whispered. “I loved you so much that I want to love you again. I don’t care if your fans would hate me like they did last year, I don’t care if they’re gonna bash at me again. I-I…”

Tao hugged Kris loosely, letting his tears wet the taller’s shirt. He wanted Kris to feel his pain, he wanted Kris to understand.

“Tao, I love you. Always have and always will. I was so horrible before I came to SM that nobody actually wanted to be with me, and also my family secrets made people didn’t want to get close to me. And then I entered SM, I changed and some girls started to like me because I changed. I was happy that people were starting to notice me, they were starting to like me. Times passed and came this young boy with dark eyes and thick black hair, he was just one of the trainees that SM would play and doll up. But there was something about his laugh or the sparkle from his dark eyes that made me feel different. So I wanted to befriend him, but he hung out with this skinny kid a lot so it was hard for me to try to talk to him. And then my stupid best friend with huge teeth and weird twitching habit told me that some one had a crush on me and that I shouldn’t get weirded out because this person was different, he told me that the person would be waiting for me in the dance practice room.”

Kris Tao’s face, making him turned and looked into Kris’ eyes. Kris wiped the dripping tears on Tao’s face with his thumb.

“Actually, I was expecting a disabled girl or something. But then I saw a young boy, the one I’ve been trying to befriend with. He wasn’t disabled at all, he was perfect. He had a nice arm, lean and beautiful body, his hair was damp from the sweat from the wushu moves he was doing. He was startled when he realized I was looking, actually I was staring, at him. And then he asked me ‘Can I help you with something?’, that was the first time I heard his voice, it was gentle, it was so soft and I could hear the innocence in it. I freaked out and said ‘Nothing, I need to go, bye’”

Tao rested his head on Kris’ chest. He was no longer sobbing, but tears were streaming down his cheeks.

“We never talked again after that encounter, but I really wanted to talk to him again so the week after I went to see him. He completely ignored me! When I asked him why, he said ‘Why should I talk to a person who doesn’t want to talk to me?’” Tao laughed a little at the memory. Pieces of the forgotten pictures were filling his empty troubled mind, making him fly back to the time where Kris’ story took place.

“Why should I talk to a person who doesn’t want to talk to me?”, Tao snickered.

“I-I’m sorry. Are you saying that I don’t want to talk to you?”, Kris stuttered replying the boy’s question.

“Of course. You ran away when I asked you what you needed. It was pretty obvious for me that you don’t like me. So, if you’ll excuse me, I need to catch up to my friend, he’s waiting for me outside.” Tao picked his bag and left the room, but Kris was able to stop him first by holding his arm.

“I am sorry. I didn’t mean to be like that. I was just freaking out because of something. What’s your name? I’m—“

“Exactly, you were freaked out by me, the only person in the room. Oh, and I don’t need to know your name, I’m not telling you mine”

Tao shook his arm harshly, releasing himself from Kris’ hold and exited the room. Leaving Kris dazed by his sassiness and the way his steps swayed when he walked.

Tao smiled as Kris rested his head on top of Tao’s, he was still rubbing the younger one’s back soothingly, trying to make the pain go away.

“He completely rejected me! But that just made me want to get to know him more, because I’m not going to lie he was beautiful. I was starting to question myself, since when do I like boys?” Kris chuckled. “I asked nearly everyone in SM for his name, and then…”

“Huang Zi Tao”

Tao widened his eyes at the familiar but not so familiar voice behind him. How dare he disturb Huang Zi Tao’s beach strolling time!

“Excuse me? What are you doing here?”, Tao turned around and narrowed his eyes at the Canadian young man behind him.

“That’s your name isn’t it? Huang Zi Tao, born May 2, 1993, from Qingdao, China, entered SM Entertainment not too long ago”, Kris smiled at the younger boy.

“Are you a stalker? Don’t you have anything better to do?”

“And I believe you also know my name. But it’s rude without introduction, is it not? My name is Wu Yifan, born November 6, 1990, I’m Canadian but I am fully Chinese by blood. Nice to meet you”, Kris smiled and bowed.

Tao could hear the seagull cries on the background. Damn, did it have to be sunset?

“Well… Well, you already know me so I don’t have to introduce myself”. Tao shrugged and returned his attention to the beautiful view of the sun sinking into the ocean.

Kris stepped forward, so he was right next to Tao. “Tell me, Huang Zi Tao. What were you doing in the dance practice room that day?”

“I was practicing wushu? Were you blind?”

“I know that. But was that the only reason you were there?”

Tao widened his eyes, but quickly controlled his face again. “O-of course! Why else would I be there?”

“Because my friend told me that someone has a crush on me and said that I should see that person in the dance practice room”

ing hell, Sehun, that kid, I know I shouldn’t trust that bratty mouth of his. Tao cleared his throat. “Well, how should I know? I was only there for practicing”

“Tao” Kris moved so he was facing Tao and looked directly into the boy’s dark orbs. “Please stop pretending, I’m not going to judge you. I already know that you are the one having a crush on me”

Tao’s heart stopped. Great, now he’s losing every opportunity to be close to Kris, now Kris will think he’s gay and disgusting and ugh, just who wants to be close to gay people? Especially someone as hot as Kris. He would like a y girl with a nice packet.

“Ya! Why are you so cocky? No one said I have a crush on you. You’re scaring me, Wu. Will you pl—“

“It’s alright, I’m not going to judge you for having a crush on me. But it’s just a crush, isn’t it?”

Breathe, Tao. Breathe. You can crawl in a hole and maybe exit SM and move to YG or JYP or even just go back to China and be a factory worker there, just bear a little bit longer, after this conversation.

“I told you I don’t hav—“

“You know, I was hoping that maybe you could feel the same way about me.”

Tao gasped loudly, making Kris chuckled and put his hand on Tao’s shoulder.

“I like you, Huang Zi Tao. I know we only see each other a few times and we never shared a nice conversation. But I think I’m already in the process of falling in love with you. I was going to ask you to be my boyfriend, or maybe just share…something? But I can see that you’re not interested in me so—“

“Yes! I would love to be your boyfriend! I like you, Yifan ge!”

“What did you say?”, Kris smirked playfully.

“I said, I like you and yes, I would love to be your boyfriend.”

Kris hugged the smiling boy in front of him. Tao just closed his eyes, feeling the shore breeze before his skin and the warmth of Kris’ body on his. But Kris had to let go, Tao pouted and Kris just tapped his lips.

“I’ll try my best and make you so happy that you will not regret saying yes to me. We’re going to spend each day together until the day we fall in love and holding each other is like breathing”

“You’re so cheesy”, Tao giggled and blushed.

“…I never stopped loving him until this second”, Kris finished. He didn’t realize that Tao was too caught up in his own memory that he wasn’t listening to Kris’ side of it. But Kris was happy, he was happy that he could make Tao smile again.

“Baby? Earth calling Huang Zi Tao~” Kris slid his hand to Tao’s side and started tickling him, snapping Tao out of his little dreamland.

“Ah! Yifan ge! Stop!” Kris laughed and stopped, he leaned to peck Tao on the lips which Tao happily receive.

“We should eat our dinner you know. It’s getting cold” Tao reached out for the plates and give Kris his dinner.

They eat while chatting happily, sharing little kisses, tasting each other’s food, feeding each other.

“We’re done~” Tao cooed while patting his stomach.

“You just stay here, okay baby? You made us the dinner now I’m going to clean up”

“Thank you, Gege~”

“No worries, beautiful”

Kris stepped out of the room and washed the plates gently. He didn’t want to break the plates or he would have to buy another ones.

“You didn’t make him cry again, did you?”

Kris narrowed his eyes at the voice. “No”

“You should just give up, stop trying. He’s never going to love you again”, Sehun walked closer, he stopped right behind Kris.

“You should just give up. He never loved you, what do you want from him? You’re just burdening him” Kris wiped the plates and put them on the racks, turned around and glaring at Sehun, fiercely.

“I’m burdening him? I was the one that made him stop crying over you.”

“He’s tortured now. He’s so confused that he’s tortured. What do you really want, Sehun?”

“I want you to stay away from him, because it’s always been me. I was there for him before you showed up, I was always there for him when he cried.”

“I know I’m not the best boyfriend in the world for him, but I made him happy, I made him fall hard for me”

Sehun scoffed, “You made him happy? Don’t make me laugh. All you did, is making him cry. Your fans, they hated him, just because he sees you as a role model and stick around you. They accused him of being spoiled, immature, and dependant. You were just there, sitting with your face, because you just couldn’t risk your image. I was the one who comforted him, it was always been me. I’m the one who saved him from you, numerous times.”

“You’re a bastard, Oh Sehun. You’re accusing me of such bad things, but what about you? What about Luhan ge? Do you not hear him cry every night? Do you not know that Yixing and Joonmyeon are so tired of comforting and soothing him every night? Don’t be such a hypocrite. Me and Tao, our relationship isn’t perfect. In fact, it’s far from perfect. We cried, we fought, that’s normal. I say again, don’t be such a hypocrite. You should stop sticking your nose in mine and Tao’s private life and start taking care of your own. Yes, okay, I admit you saved Zitao numerous times and yes I was being a bloody idiot for not taking care of him back then. But open your eyes, Sehun. There’s someone really needs to be saved right now, by no one else, but you.”

Kris tapped Sehun’s shoulder, “Think about it, Sehun. You’re my member too, we are one, remember? Have a good night”. And he walked back to his room, because tonight he finally made Tao smile.

Sehun opened and closed his mouth, unable to say or think of anything. He turned and watched as Kris closed his bedroom door, thinking about every word that the leader said to him.

Hello to everyone! I hope you really like this chapter I got really inspired last night and I really couldn't sleep because it was stuck in my head like an annoying bug thingy latching to my brain stem ;____________;

Here's to ALL Taoris shipper. I was freaking out because taoris is back, I was jumping like a bloody idiot and my deskmate had to literally calmed me down from all my yelling.

My real friends wanted to read this fic, I think I'm gonna bury myself in a hole and die or something, aaaa im so embarassed I hope they forget my username and the story link.

Just enjoy. Comment up, sub up! Yay!

21bangsfangirl