Kyungsoo took a long drag, he choked slightly. This was only his fourth cigarette he ever had in his life. He knows this is unhealthy, but every time he inhales, all his worries go away. That basterd, whom he loves, goes away. All he thinks about is how good he feels with every drag. He quickly flicked the cigarette away from him and stretched.

“Kyungsoo!” Jonghyun called out from the window. Kyungsoo looked up and smiled.

Jonghyun gave a little smile back, “The phone call is for you, hurry up inside!”

Kyungsoo thought about just refusing to talk, like he did for the past few days. But, he wants to know how the love of his life is doing. Even though he knows, damn well, that he would never be able to get that love returned to him.

Once he walked back into the apartment, Jonghyun handed him the phone.  Kyungsoo calmly walked into Jonghyun’s bedroom and sat on the bed. He exhaled deeply and placed the phone near his ear.

“Hello”

“It’s Kris…How are you doing?”

“I’m fine.”

“You know, everyone misses you right?”

“that thought crossed my mind…once”

“Look Kyungsoo, I’m not going to sugar-coat my words. Just bring your back home.”

“That, im afraid, I can’t do….”

“Why? Can’t you put your personal aside, and think about the group first. Our comeback is coming closer! We can practice without, but we still need the complete 12”

“K-kris..i’m not ready to come back.”

“You don’t have time to act like a Diva, Kyungsoo! The managers are up my about  you disappearing!”

“h-hyung,I’m sorry but-“

“NO, Kyungsoo you have ing two days to pull your together. In two days, you are going to come back and practice your little off.”

“f-fine..b-but how is j-jong-“

“Lifeless…Just remember you have two days and you still not wanting to come, I will personally drag your over here by your ears. Understood?”

“Yes, bye hyung”

Once Kyungsoo heard Kris hung up, he burst into tears. He curled into a ball and clutched the phone near his chest. Kris doesn’t understand that he almost took his own life. None of them understand Kyungsoo’s pain. All Kyungsoo is thinking about the love of his life suffering because of him. Lifeless? He wants to make everyone feel happy, but again he failed. Again, he’s thinking he should quietly drown himself in the bathtub. No one would notice and everyone would life happily. Even Jongin.. All Kyungsoo wants his for Jongin to be happy.

“Oh my God, Kyungsoo!” Jonghyun said so surprised seeing Kyungsoo curled up, bawling his eyes out.

Jonghyun quickly held the younger in his arms, rocking back and forth, trying to soothe him. He whispered comforting words to Kyungsoo. Kyungsoo didn’t care for the words; all he wants is to Make Jongin happy. All he wants is to feel warmth. All he wants is…Jongin.

Kyungsoo looked up at Jonghyun,”H-hyung, I just want him to be happy. I l-love him.”

Jonghyun’s heart ached hearing those words. He’s knows he shouldn’t be selfish, but he can’t help it. He has feelings for Kyungsoo.  “It’s ok, I’m here Kyungsoo,” He said while squeezing the younger closer.

~Probably the shortest chapter ever, but this is all I have right now. I’ll try to update sooner this time. Sorry I took so long for this small chapter….”