Sorry for my super delayed update, I'm pretty much into volunteer camp recently, found painting and construction were fun, lol.. ^ ^, This chapter is kinda short.. i'm sorry... T-T...

Warning : A LOT OF grammar errors and typos (sorry i have no time for checking... T^T..)

@smiley44 YiXing is that kind with charp tongue, lol

@SuperCloud_Nov they will move on :))

@Teeheehaha-ara well.. thank you for reading ^ ^,

@Paraae T^T... best comment ever.. you made my day honey.. thank you so much for reading my fic, I'll try to put them to a happy ending... :))

@GugGig0307 Minseok just shocked.. he will get used to it soon, lol..

@froyolovers Duizhang has a cute moment too ^^,

@DrumRolls please jump back up, update is here!! ^ ^, thank you for reading my fic :))

@CHENDANCINGMACHINE  I love XiuRis too!!!

@futsuji lol... there will be the answer :))

@starkey Luhan will try harder ^ ^,

@morinomnom rock, paper, scissor.. to choose, lol :))

@bambino pretty good idea,lol ^ ^,

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CHAPTER 11 : I AM...

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The raining sound woke up the boy from his sleep, it’s just 6 in the morning… even he wanted to sleep more.. but he couldn’t really close his eyes peacefully..

“ ..Umm…” … small boy on his bed groaned out when the morning came.. He slept not so well last night, not because of new roommate.. but it was because of Luhan… that friend even popped in his dream… that pretty face.. sad smile… tears.. confession.. and the kiss… what a nightmare…

“ ..” said to himself, sat up then realized Kris’s arm on his waist.. the big boy whined when he noticed the bed’s owner moved…

“ ..uhh… it’s still too early Minseok-ah… sleep some more..” …pulled small boy back down effortlessly… Xiumin sighed to the giant beside him… this dude is a sleep head indeed..

“ Let go of me YiFan.. I need to use toilet..” …tried to lift that long arm.. Kris opened his eyes for a second looking at his friend…

“ … no schedule today… come back here when you’re done..” …said that, released the soft body from his strong arm… couldn’t stop thinking… this really feels like newlywed life… waking up in the morning and the first person to see is Minseok… this morning lacked of just one thing… ‘morning kiss’…. Dreamed happily and fell back asleep in no time…

Xiumin looked himself in the mirror, the reflection showed a worn out boy with tiring expression…

“ I didn’t sleep well couple nights already…” …sighed to his own comment.. started washing his face… then realized he forgot to bring the towel..

“ what a mess..” complained when the water dripping from his face all over the sink… he couldn’t walk out like this… luckily he heard familiar stepping sound… it’s still so early.. only Lay who will get up…

“ YiXing!.. hand me a small towel..” …told the person outside the bathroom, soon enough the door slid open with the towel passing through. The eldest grabbed the white towel, hurriedly wiped his face on it..

“ Thank you  YiXing..” …his cute face was still covered with the towel… pushed the door to open wider…

“ you’re welcome..” …soft sweet voice answered… and that gave him quite a shock… small boy lifted his head straight, let the towel fell on his hand…

“ Luhan..” …whispered the name out… skinny boy stood right there at the door corner… sending him a sad smile… Xiumin avoided the gaze.. he walked through the very left of the door while Luhan just stood still watching his awkward reaction… oh my God.. why Luhan of all those people… rushed toward his bedroom..

“ Minseok…” …his voice was hoarse.. the person coughed a few time..  small boy parked his step right there but didn’t turn to look at his friend

“ O… Oh.... what is it?”.. from everything that has happened, he still can’t make up his mind to face Luhan

Luhan looked at the back of Xiumin, his gaze showed an obvious weary…. He didn’t sleep at all the whole night… the dark circle showed, plus his eyes puffed from the cry last night…

“ … I won’t do anything to harm or scare you…. really…   could you please look at me?... can you just talk to me?... it’s hurt so much when you ignore me completely like this…” …his voice said so, he is in pain....

Xiumin felt his heart dropped… it’s not usual he made people feel bad, turned to meet Luhan’s eyes… and that made him feel even worse.. Luhan looked like a real sick person..

The pretty boy gave out a weak smile when he saw Xiumin looked at him…

“ ..I miss you..” ….whispered with his watery eyes..  the brown hair boy bit his lip, trying to get himself together.. not to comply with that pathetic expression… but why he felt so guilty seeing Luhan like this…

“ I’m sorry…”.. said Xiumin.. it’s only thing he could give to Luhan… he feels so sorry…

“ ….” The blonde boy fell in silence for minutes… both of them didn’t talk a thing.. didn’t move an inch… like the time stopped… Xiumin dared not to check on his friend.. locked his eyes on the floor instead….

“… was that also your answer?...” …the hoarse voice was shaking as he tried hardest to restrain his tear…  short boy inhaled a big gulp of air…

“ yes.. Luhan.. I’m sorry…” …said his decision clearly….  Other party just nodded to it…

“ I’m ok with it… but can I ask why?... you can take some more time to consider abou…” …..

“ No!!…” … small boy cut the conversation….

“ Luhan.. please… I don’t need time or anything…. it’s just not right… I’m a man and you are… you may confuse since we are too close recently…” ….gathered all his courage and walked to another boy…

“ we are already good being friends…. You are a perfect decent man…. You will find you perfect girl soon… forget it Luhan.. I’ll do so…” ….tried to convince the blonde boy who stood there with his heart breaking… Xiumin grabbed Luhan’s left hand in console manner…

“ I love you as a friend Luhan… I love you so much, that doesn’t need to explain.. and it will last forever… our friendship is the strongest bond… let’s forget everything… ok?..” …talked with his soft and warm voice, held Luhan’s hand in his.. and that…. the tears streamed down from those beautiful doe eyes… the blonde boy folded his fingers wrapping Xiumin’s, clenched that soft hand from time to time… just the quiet sobbing to be heard between them..

“ …why…” … pretty lips let out the same old question….

“ because we both are men… and I never think of you that way…” …righteous Xiumin as always… he’s not against the third gender nor discriminate on their existence.. but just… never plan to be a part of them…

Luhan continued sobbing his eyes out… holding on to that small hand…

“ …so… if I were a girl.. you will love me..?..” ….the tears still falling non stop… Xiumin held his breath hearing the question… the man in front of him didn’t seem to give up that easy..

“ It’s not that.. Luhan..” … tried to explain.. but Luhan shook his head denied to listen to anything…

“ Minseok-ah… can’t you just throw away the fact of gender for second… look only at me..” …lifted his gaze to meet with short boy..

“ I’m not a girl… I’m not a boy… but please Minseok… I’m just Luhan.. who loves you so much… the Luhan.. a human, his heart is beating for you… the Luhan who can live and die for you…” … he  paused.. closing his eyes chased away the tears… then pulled the soft body into his embrace… the eldest was surprised… but he was kind and calm enough to not push Luhan away immediately…

“ I can’t stop loving you… even if I die…” …muttered closely to the eldest’s ear… Xiumin sighed to situation….

“ Luhan.. I’m a man… really..” …that’s all what he think about… Luhan tightened his hug…

“ I know… don’t need you to tell me that….” …snuggled his face on Xiumin’s shoulder..

“ I don’t care what you are.. even if you were just a tree.. a chair… a thing.. or whatever..” lifted his head to look straight into Xiumin’s eyes..

“ one day I will find you… and love you… that’s my destiny… my faith… to live loving you with all my heart…..” … two pairs of eyes locked firmly… one was trying to pass his sincere feeling through his words… another one was trying to search the meaning in it…. Small boy felt his heart beat a bit faster from the last quote… those teary beautiful eyes still staring piercing through his heart… well… this is Luhan.. his close friend who never harm him... Luhan, who always take care and fully support him… just skip the fact of his confession… he didn’t do anything wrong at all…

“ ….” …  brown hair boy kept his mouth shut… then slowly patted on Luhan’s back rapidly… Admitted himself he was wrong and too narrowed mind to judge Luhan’s feeling just because they are the same gender… even he never think of liking a man… but…  if someone loves me this much.. I should be thankful…right?...

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“ what a touching moment…” …unicorn boy stood in his bedroom with his back leaning against the door… felt himself is getting more like stalker day by day.. but can’t help.. this story is too interesting to ignore….

“ …why you kept quiet hyung… don’t say you gave in already… so not fun…” …said in annoying… it’s been five minutes at least that the two fell silent....

“ I’m just and audience anyway….” … told himself that… but felt a bit tingly in his chest.. don’t know what is it… it’s fun seeing Kris and Luhan chasing the big hyung like this… but… he never wants that Kim Minseok to end up with anyone…

“ I’m the weird one…” ….commented on himself, about what he has done lately… rested his head on the door.. sighed a long breath in confuse… felt so disturbing… then he heard the further conversation from outside… an unexpected result…

“… ridiculous…” … snorted to what he heard…

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Two boys outside still looked into each other eyes… liked they were trying to sort things out…. finally small boy lowered his gaze first….

“ …. One month…. give me one month… I need time…” …the petal-liked lips let out the last decision…  after minutes passed… with the words escaped from his beloved friend…. Luhan widened his eyes in surprised in disbelief… he couldn’t content the words for how he feels now.. his thin lips slowly form an obvious curve, his eyes shines brightly.. small drop of tear fell from the corner of his eye…  happy tear…. Then pulled small body into his tight embrace… used all his strength wrapping around that soft body… so scared.. if he loosen his arms just a bit.. this person will run away again….

“ Thank you! Minseok-ah.. Thanks!!...” …said happily, held small boy even tighter.. while the person was trying to push him away…

“ … I don’t accept your feeling yet, Luhan…” … stated it again… Luhan let out a warm smile, slowly broke the hug…

“ It doesn’t matter… just you said you will think about it… thank you, Minseok..” …smiled with his red and puffed eyes..

Xiumin stood still… did he commit it wrong.. would one month be enough…

“ … don’t do weird thing …. Just leave me to think by myself… during the time.. let’s be the same… I mean.. just friends.. ok?... “ … noted with Luhan again…. And the person nodded to him with his bright smile…

“ ...ok... we are just friends now…I will wait…” …said full of hope…. It’s ok Minseok…. Not only one month.. I can give you the rest of my life to wait…. Just take a single minute each day…

“ Um….” .. felt his heart even heavier…. This one month… I will try to convince you Luhan.. friendship is the best thing between us… after 30 days… so you won’t be so hurt from the proper refusal…

Small boy smiled awkwardly to Luhan…

…..

 “ so…. I have a month more to play….” …. Unicorn boy sighed… his heart is heavy too…

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TBC>>

credit : Photo is not mine... just foun it on tunblr :)) credit as it says....