“....I think the question ‘what the are you doing here’ is the one to use right now…”Jieun sighed. Yunho was perched on her bed as she entered her apartment.

“Naomi let me in. She was just going out..”Yunho stood up and walked towards her. Jieun backed away before her back met the wall. Yunho slammed his hands against the wall on either sides of her head and she jumped slightly.

“…Are you here to kill me?” Jieun muttered,eyes downcast.

“..You think I could ever hurt you?” Yunho sighed. “I just…I don’t understand. I thought you loved me..thought we had a connection. I don’t even know why we fell apart.”

“Yunho..its not that I don’t love you…I..I just don’t want to feel like this all the time…”

“Feel like what!? What do you hate so much about me that you have to hurt me like this?” Yunho grabbed her hand and pressed it against his chest. “You don’t know…you don’t know how much it hurts me to see you with him…’

“Im not a genius…but I think it feels exactly like how I felt when you were ing that .” Jieun tried to push him away. “Yunho…you don’t love me…you think you do. Im just another one of your trophies that you keep right next to your Artist of the Year or Best Male Group. I get the not being able to spend time together part…I really do. Youre busy,I understand and I was willing to do whatever it took to keep this relationship afloat. But I couldn’t do it all on my own. Yunho..you havent made a single effort to get to know me better. I know almost everything about you because you talk…a lot. But really..youre clueless about me..”Jieun caressed his cheek with her fingertips.

“I know you!”

“Whats my favourite color?”

“Pink!”

“Purple. Whats my eye color?”

“Black.”

“Dark brown. Favourite artist?”

“TVXQ!”

“John Mayer. Whats my field?”

“..Arts..”

“Business Administration. I told you this the first time we met. See what I mean? Your favourite color is green,your eye color is black and your favourite artist is Michael Jackson and you studied Music at Myeongi along with Junsu. Your favourite brand is Armani and you prefer jeans over dress pants. You drive an Audi but you want to buy a Ferrari like Jaejoong’s. Your favourite perfume seems to vary between DavidOff’s Hot Water and Obession by Calvin Klein. I know everything about you and you know nothing. And then youre asking me why I broke up with you? What went wrong? I know no one from your life besides Changmin and Im sick of acting like youre serious about us. Im not getting any younger and neither are you. Why do I like Jaejoong? Why was I so quick to run into his arms? Because he was there for me all along Yunho and I refused to see it. I knew for the longest time that he liked me but I chose to ignore it because I was so busy running after you,trying to get you to notice me..”

“And I did-“

“Well praise the Lord! Okay..why havent I met any of your friends yet Yunho?” Jieun folded her arms and glared at him.

“..I..I havent had the time..”Yunho finished lamely.”All my friends are celebrities and they don’t have time so excuse me if I couldn’t get them to clear their schedules so that they could meet you! Plus! Im not even sure where we’re going..I don’t want to do anything rash. I mean..what if we don’t end up together. People are gonna think Im just some playboy and that’s seriously going to ruin me! Im a celebrity first and your boyfriend later Jieun…why cant you understand that!?”

Jieun just stared at him as tears stung at her eyes.  She slowly shook her head. “And then you really wonder why I chose Jaejoong…?” She managed to push him away,grabbed her stuff and proceeded to the door.

“JIUEN!” Yunho yelled.

Jieun turned,hand on the doorknob. “The day you’ll truly be happy is when you realize youre Yunho first and Uknow later.” With that she slammed the door shut.

*

“Don’t you look like a mess…”Jaejoong hugged her.

“Oh hi there!” A bubbly voice made Jieun look up from Jaejoong chest. Junsu was grinning at her from across the room,dressed in a deep blue and white shorts. Behind him, glass of alcohol in hand,stood Yoochun who smiled and raised his glass in greeting.

“Oh..umm..hello. Jieun imnida.” Jieun bowed. Awkward.

“Yeah we know who you are. Twitter and hyung’s gooey texts.” Yoochun smirked.

“Yah! Don’t tell her~” Jaejoong whined.

“Oh Yoochun,I think you’ll have to move because Ive found a new soul mate..”Yoochun said in a girly high-pitched voice.

“Junsu-ah..hyung is in love. No more sad songs for us~” Junsu rolled his eyes.

“Youre such a mushball..”Jieun grinned and hugged her boyfriend.

“Aigoo…Im a man okay..”Jaejoong pouted.

“Oh yes you are.” Jieun whispered in his ear. “The bulge in your pants agrees.”

Jaejoong turned slightly pink before turning his head to mumble against her ear. “Well,maybe it needs to be dealt with..”

“Umm..if you guys are done mumbling sin into eachothers ears…lets eat?” Yoochun laughed.

Jieun’s eyes widened at the huge pizza lying on top of the centre table. “Umm..but calo..”she stopped as Jaejoong frowned at her. “Oh screw it..I hope it has extra cheese!”

“Ah the sister I always wanted!” Junsu squealed as he practically ripped open the box and placed two huge slices on his plate.

“Yah! Leave some for me..”Yoochun joined him.

“Something you wanna talk about babe?” Jaejoong gazed deeply into her eyes.

“..Can I ask you something?”

“Okay..”

“Whats my favourite color?”

“..Purple? You wear it all the time.”

“Favourite artist?”

“..That..that singer..John-something. Saw his songs on your phone..why?”

“My eye color?”

“Same as your hair. Dark brown. It looks black but it actually isnt.”

“..I love you.” Jieun kissed him.

“I love you too but what was with the pop quiz?”

“Nothing.” Now I know. Now I truly understand. Love isnt about getting together with that hot guy you have had a crush on since forever. Its about finding that one person who knows you better than you know yourself. That person who can hold your hand infront of the world and says ‘hey you know what,shes perfect and I don’t give a flying to what you think’. Jaejoong loves me,he has loved me all along for who I am. He didn’t care if I was a few pounds over weight. He saw more to me than just some posession. He made me realize that for the right person,I’d never have to change. I know that I cant keep living my life to impress other people.  So I guess Im going to be living my life like I want to because I know that I am good enough! I may not be skinny and have a model’s figure, but my boyfriend loves me regardless of my physical short-comings. Ive found happiness atlast and Im where I need to be. In the arms of the man who will always love me,keep me safe and never make me feel like I don’t measure up. Because he knows as well as I do that nobody is perfect and really,its our  imperfections that make us all the more lovable.

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FIN

So I know that this isnt exactly the best fic Ive ever written but I suddenly lost inspiration for it in the middle but then I got re-inspired and well..I do sincerely apologize if it hasnt lived up to the standard you all expect from me *pushes Junsu and his angel pose before her readers*. Well like I said,Im working on a new fic and Im contemplating whether to put up the foreword and just let it sit there for two months or just upload it then. So Im not marking this story complete till I decide so please tell me what you would prefer? 

I sincerely hope that this story helped give strength to all those out there who suffer from the same dilemma as Jieun did. In the end I guess,its important to always be yourself and sure the right guy is going to take his sweet time to come along...but that doesnt mean he wont come. Always remember that you ARE beautiful! And if a guy cant see that then he's losing out on something amazing. Our 5 boys love all of us..sure its not in the capacity of taking us into their beds and ing us senseless, but theirs is a love that is pure because they are grateful for every little thing we do. So please lets continue to support our angels.

Leave your views in the comments below and tell me whether to upload the new fic's foreword or not. Back to studying~ :D Ciao~