Dear Seoho,

I don't know what to think anymore.

It hurt so much seeing them again

They gave me a second chance.

I wish they hadn't. it would've saved me so much more grief

Would YOU have given me a second chance?

I don't think you would've. At the same time I think you would've

I'm scared. Of what? I don't know. I'm just
 

~

Keonhee looked up when he felt eyes on him, seeing Sejun talking with a customer and said customer talking about him from the way they looked over every few seconds. Keonhee let out a surprised breath when he recognized who it was, sinking further into his chair to hide from the one person he didn't want to see again.

What was Eunwoo doing here at Chani's Starbucks? Keonhee was sure it was for missions, but there had to be more to it than that. He had a gut feeling that just wouldn't go away.

A text pinged to his phone and Keonhee checked it, finding a message from Sejun. He isn't here for you. Just leave it be it said. Keonhee breathed a sigh of relief, looking down at his journal before closing it, no longer in the mood to write. He hooked his pen to the front of the journal after moving the strap over the front to keep it shut. He put the journal on the table and sipped on the coffee that had been sitting there for the passed 10 minutes or so.

"I heard from Kevin that you've changed a lot since the incident," said Eunwoo as he walked over, sitting down in front of Keonhee. "I've had time to think over what happened," hummed Keonhee as he put down his up of coffee.

"Rocky and I have also had time to think over your actions," said Eunwoo. "What's done is done," he said. "Nothing can change that fact," he said. "Will we forgive you? Probably not," he said. "But we have agreed to leave you be," he said. "I see," said Keonhee. "Is that all?" He asked. "That's it," said Eunwoo. "Okay," said Keonhee.
 

~

Keonhee let out a soft sigh as he plopped down on the bench that was a few feet from the lake behind the house. "Rough day?" Asked Yunho as he went to sit down beside Keonhee.

"Why is everyone giving me second chances?" Asked Keonhee as he leaned back, huffing as he looked out over the water. "You feel like you don't deserve them?" Asked Yunho. "I do, but I feel like I'm getting let off easy," said Keonhee as he shook his head.

"I think everyone is starting to understand things from your point of view," said Yunho as he shrugged. "You're also starting to open up to me as you continue staying with me," he said. "They want you to keep an eye on me don't they?" Asked Keonhee. "No," said Yunho. "I invited you to stay out of my own volition," he said. "Eunwoo was only here for a mission," he added. "Running into you was simply an accident," he said. "I see," hummed Keonhee.
 

~

Keonhee opened his eyes, looking up at the dark ceiling above him. His journal sat on the desk across the room but he didn't bother going to finish it. Seoho didn't deserve a finished letter this time.

"That's right," mumbled Keonhee as he felt eyes on him, figuring Seoho was in the room somewhere. "I'm not going to finish this damn letter," he said, scowling.

"Just let me sleep okay?" He asked, turning over onto his side, facing a still sleeping Yunho who was sleeping with a small polar bear plushie courtesy of Mingi. Keonhee listened to Yunho's soft breathing for a few minutes before he sat up, letting his feet hit the floor before he stood, grabbing his phone and leaving the room. He headed downstairs and grabbed his shoes, putting them on before going outside to sit on the back deck.
 

~

Yunho came outside sometime after sunrise, bringing a cup of coffee for Keonhee. Keonhee mumbled a thanks before taking a sip, putting the cup down on the bench in front of him.

"Couldn't sleep huh?" Asked Yunho as he looked out at the water. "No," hummed Keonhee. "Are you okay?" Asked Yunho. "I don't know," said Keonhee as he sighed, picking up his cup of coffee and taking a sip before putting it back down on the bench.

"Do you want to talk about it?" Asked Yunho. "No," said Keonhee. "I just need time to think," he said.

"Where is your mind right now?" Asked Yunho as he turned to Keonhee. "Everywhere," hummed Keonhee as he looked at Yunho.

"You're hurting," said Yunho as he noticed a different look in Keonhee's eyes than what he usually had.

"...I never finished writing," said Keonhee. "You feel bad for that?" Asked Yunho. "I couldn't write what I wanted to write down," said Keonhee. "So I just stopped writing," he said. "There's always next time," said Yunho.

"Do you have unfinished letters to San?" Asked Keonhee. "All the time," said Yunho as he nodded. "There's so much I want to say to him, to rant to him, but I always start it off then never finish it," he said, taking a sip of his coffee. "I see," hummed Keonhee.
 

~

Keonhee looked like a wreck when he sat down on the bench a few feet from the lake behind the house. "You look like a train ran you over a few times," said Yunho as he sat down beside Keonhee. "I haven't been able to sleep," said Keonhee. "What's causing that?" Asked Yunho. "I don't know," Keonhee said honestly. "Huh," hummed Yunho.

"I am trying to sleep most nights," said Keonhee. "But I just... I just can't," he said. "How is your insanity?" Asked Yunho. "I don't know," said Keonhee. "I feel fine," he added. "I don't feel like going on a murderous rampage," he said. "I just don't know what is wrong with me," he said. "Weird," said Yunho.