Yena was sitting on her seat with a small notebook on the table in front of her. They were in a flight for a schedule abroad, LA to be exact, for KCON. Lately, Yena had been learning how to write a song from Minju. It’s been a week or so since she started. She still remembered how Yujin about it on how she wanted to learn that just because Yuri was a really good song writer. Partially, that’s true, the reason for her learning. The other one would be, she’s on her second project, her second gift for Yuri. 

Yena was doing her best but she’s still far from being a good one and honestly, she’s terrible. Minju helped her a lot but still, she’s lacking and struggling a lot with it. However, the thought of giving up didn’t come to her mind though. It’s the one quality of hers that she was always proud of. She would occasionally complain about it but after she remembered why she did that, she would turn silent and did her best writing again.

Yena was scribbling, writing what came to mind but in the end, she tore it off because it’s not good at all, even without her showing it to Minju. She would write a lot of words and sentences. Minju or Eunbi would be the one helping her pick which was worth to save and among those that she had been writing all this time, there wasn’t even a page after she kept it. Those were just sentences and she couldn’t even arrange anything yet from it. Truth be told, she was a bit frustrated because of it. If it wasn’t a project for Yuri, she would have given up by now. Why should I pick this for a project for Yuri? There were times when she wondered about that herself.

Yena sighed and rested her head against the headrest, Yujin was on her right as she sat by the window. Yujin was asleep and it made her think that she should sleep too. Hopefully when she woke up, there would be more ideas coming to her mind. Yeah, she should take a break. Unfortunately, that day, she couldn’t fall asleep at all and she was hating the universe for making her couldn’t sleep during the flight.

In the end, she didn’t sleep. She gave up her sleep and watched something that was provided by the in-flight service. She got no idea in writing so why not watch something, maybe she could get some ideas from the movie she watched. She ended up watching two movies while munching some chips and jellies that she brought with her. She wished that she could have some sleep like Yujin because it definitely took a huge toll on her body. 

When they arrived at LA, her members could see how drained their main rapper was, to the extent that Yena didn’t make any sound at all. They made their way to the van and Yena literally threw herself on the seat, sighing loudly.

“Why didn’t you sleep?” Eunbi scolded Yena who looked like a living dead.

“I wanted to, but I couldn’t.” Yena whined with an obvious pout on her face. She knew their schedule ahead would be kinda busy, more rehearsals to give the best performance for their fans who would attend the concert.

“Sleep unnie. We’ll wake you up once we arrived at the hotel.” Minju said, this time taking a seat next to Yena to take care of the older.

“Thanks, Minju.” Yena muttered softly, eyes now closed trying to get some sleep because the moment they dropped their things off and had a shower, they would directly headed to the venue to start their rehearsal.

***

Rose’s members were studying the plan for their dance move around the stage and also rehearsing the MC-ing too when their group was on stage. The MC-ing would be done by Wonyoung and Hyewon and the two had been rehearsing the whole morning and the rest of the members were practicing on the answers for the talk since everything would be in English although there would be translators around but they wanted to be able to engage with the fans more without depending too much on the translators.

The group would take occasional breaks, looking at their phone, chatting with one another, grabbing some snacks or listening to some songs to relax. Yuri already had her headphone plugged in and she had been humming to songs playing from her phone. 

Yuri also tried to calm herself down. She felt nervous, excited, too much emotions to feel at that moment. It’s a mixed feelings. It always happened when they performed abroad because she wasn’t really good in English or Japanese but she did always try her best. At that moment, Yena came to her mind. She wished that she had Yena’s confidence. She saw how Yena was upstage during the talk and language never really stopped the older. Yena was still answering or mc-ing with full confidence although sometimes the older stuttered or doubted the words that came through her lips.

This time, this concert was also different. Yuri would finally meet up with Yena, a proper meeting because she knew they would definitely bump against one another or that her group would talk to their group although maybe they would have no interaction at all, coming from that Yuri told her group that they were taking their time and she believed Yena would told her own group as well. She also questioned herself on whether she wanted any interaction with Yena. 

Yuri didn’t notice that she had stopped humming from being so busy with her own thoughts. She was ready to meet Yena, she knew that deep down but she still couldn’t picture herself, walking towards Yena and started making an interaction with the older.

Yuri probably shouldn’t think too much about it. It’s just that she couldn’t help that. Yena had come to her mind way too much lately. She kept on wondering how they would interact whenever they came face to face. Somehow, she believed it wouldn’t be hard if the two of them decided to do so. Yuri knew that Yena will always make it easy for anyone to talk to Yena or just being around the older. She had experienced it first before anyone else.

Yuri’s train of thoughts was stopped by a poke on her arm. Wonyoung who’s the nearest to her was trying to get her attention. Pulling her headphone off and placing her phone on the table in front of her, with the headphone on top of it, she looked at Wonyoung and Wonyoung pointed at Chaeyeon who was gathering everyone’s attention. 

“Let’s practice one more round before we head for lunch.” Chaeyeon told the group and the leader got a nod from everyone as the answer.

***

Violet reached the venue by lunch time after they finished getting ready. Everyone was on their training outfit, wanting to stay comfortable for the stage rehearsal later on. They had gotten the stage plan from their manager and also their schedule. If not mistaken, their rehearsal would be after Rose’s. It was supposed to excite Yena if the latter wasn’t in an extremely exhausted state. Getting a glimpse of Yuri would be good enough for her.

Yena sat down on the table, staring at her small notebook that had been following her around lately. She wrote some sentences in it before she forgot. She closed the notebook, leaving it behind when she heard Minju called her over. Yena got out of her seat and took a tray as she looked around at the food provided, thinking what to eat. She moved around like a robot, holding her tray and randomly picked some food before placing a strawberry cake, the only thing she wanted, on her tray for the dessert. She then went back to their table on a corner and placed her tray down on the table where her members were. She didn’t plan to eat just yet, not in the mood. She rested her head over her notebook on the table, closing her eyes, totally ran out of energy. Her members only spared her a look but didn’t say anything, letting Yena took some rest for a moment. They knew how tired Yena was.

“Unnie, why don’t you rest at our waiting room? I’ll bring your tray of food for you after we finished eating.” Minju suggested.

“It’s alright. I’ll eat in a bit.” Yena remained still, head down with her eyes closed, face completely hidden because her hair was covering her face. 

Other idols around looked curiously at Yena who seemed extremely down. Those idols mostly had crush on Yena. The members knew if they walked away, those crushes of Yena would directly come rushing. Just imagining it was enough for chills running down their spine. It left the members wondering on how Yena could handle them all this time.

After a few seconds, Yena took a deep breath and sighed. She raised her head and brushed her hair up, fixing it from the messy state before she pulled the tray of food towards her. She placed the notebook to the side and started eating her lunch. The other idols that looked at Yena earlier quickly turned their gaze away.

Sound of a group talking suddenly came from the entrance to the room, soon mixing in the loudness of the room. From her peripheral glance, Yena saw the newcomer to the lunch room. She couldn’t exactly see what the younger was doing or hearing what the younger was saying but she was content being in the same room as the younger.

Yena could hear Yujin clearing . It’s pretty obvious that Yujin was signalling her about Yuri’s presence, which she tried to ignore. Yena just looked across her at Yujin while raising her eyebrows up. 

“What?” Yena mouthed to Yujin.

Yujin just shrugged. Yujin knew Yena was still being careful in approaching Yuri. They assured her that it would be fine but seemingly Yena still didn’t think so. Yena didn’t want Yuri to think that she wasn’t serious towards the younger and also for others to create gossips about Yuri because of her. The younger deserved a lot better. 

Pretending that nothing happened, Yena continued to slowly eat her food, almost dozed off during so until a nudge from Minju woke her up again. Her members shook their head at what was going on with Yena. Then Chaewon leaned a bit closer to Yena to whisper to the latter. 

“Do you need me to call Rose to join us?” 

Yena almost choked on her food at the question. She glared at Chaewon. Her eyes was still tired and sleepy but her brain was pretty much awake. Her members literally laughed at her and she squinted her eyes to glare at each of them.

“You guys are really annoying at time like this.”

“Can’t blame us, unnie. You are fun to tease when it comes to her.” Yujin replied with a shrug, cutting off her strawberry cake before eating it, enjoying the dessert as she had finished her lunch.

Yena would occasionally steal glances towards where Yuri was. Yena could feel that flutter again in her heart whenever it came to Yuri. A smile grew on her face just from it. She was’t thinking much about it earlier from being exhausted. Now that Yuri was around, she honestly didn’t know how to act. Her mind wandered to that particular question from her members. When would it be the right time?

Yena had her head down, staring at the table, eyebrows knitted. Time to ponder about that question. She was missing something but what was it? What it was that made her so reluctant? She didn’t know. There’s just this feeling lurking inside that stop her. She wished that she could find the answer. What if she couldn’t find the answer? Then, she wouldn’t be able to approach Yuri at all. 

Her members saw what’s going on with Yena and everyone exchanged glances wondering what they should do about it. Should they ask Yena, comfort the her or just let it be? If they were going for a cheat code, they would ask Yuri about it. However, they knew it was a line that they shouldn’t cross. Yena wouldn’t appreciate that at all. Yena would definitely be upset if they did so. 

Yena glanced to her side, seeing the notebook on the table. She placed her hand over the it, feeling the texture of the leather against her fingertips. She didn’t know why there’s a moment of doubt regarding her ‘mega’ project for Yuri now. After seeing Yuri, Yena had a huge doubt for her project. She lost her confidence in it because she knew that Yuri was a really good song writer and composer. Meanwhile, there were barely a few sentences and phrases in her notebook.

Then she got a slap on her back. She looked at who was doing it and she found their leader was the one doing it. She silently thanked Eunbi for doing so though as it did make her focus once more.

“If you think you’re going to give up in your writing, don’t you dare to do so.” Eunbi told Yena when she saw what Yena was doing and the look of giving up was clearly written on Yena’s face.

“No, I won’t. Thanks for the slap though.”

“Like we promise you, we’ll be around to help you.”

“If you feel like talking to her, go ahead. We’ll cover for you. Just like I’ve told you, don’t wait for too long.” This time it’s Chaewon who’s giving Yena a support. 

All of them knew how Yena missed Yuri despite Yena didn’t show it at all, not to mention that Yena cut off every source that could help Yena with making the older miss Yuri less. They knew how Yena deprived herself by not looking at anything about Yuri. When ever since they knew Yena, everything Yena did always revolved around Yuri.

“No.” Yena once again made up her mind. “What if people make gossips about her because of me? If they go back to make gossips about me, I will be okay because it would just go back to their previous habit and I’m used to it. But Yuri… I don’t want to create trouble for her or her members.” Yena could do it, taking a bit more time, waiting a bit longer if it meant the best for Yuri.

“Don’t you think everyone could deal with it if that kind of gossip came up? If you don’t say anything, she doesn’t say anything, and you two don’t act lovey-dovey, I think everything will be fine.” Yujin spoke softly, keeping the topic among their group and not to be listened by others.

Yena could see her members nodded in agreement, somehow for the first time to be the ones that pushed her towards someone instead of asking her to stay away. It’s so tempting to be given that chance. If she took it, would she go back to her previous habit? It scared her slightly. She didn’t want it to go out of control.

Yena looked towards the back of Yuri. The younger sat down a few tables away from them. She could see Rose’s members talked and laughed at whatever they were talking about. Then, Chaeyeon and Sakura pointed at Yuri and she couldn’t understand anything but she could make a guess that Hyewon was trying to cheer the younger up. She had an apprehensive gaze at Yuri, staring at the back of the younger. She wanted to close the gap in between them, making the steps towards Yuri. It’s just that it’s her turn to be scared.

“Maybe later.” Yena was turning into a coward right now, the full of confidence Yena was now gone.

“You’re just being a coward now.” Chaewon stated.

“I know.” To everyone’s surprise, Yena was actually agreeing about that, instead of arguing like how she usually was.

“Let’s head back.” Yena told them, getting up and took her strawberry cake out of the tray and placed it on top of her notebook along with the small fork. She would eat the dessert later. She carried the tray and placed it on the counter before heading back to the table to take the cake and the book with her. 

Her members followed her behind, doing the same thing like she did earlier. She checked the table one more time to make sure that they didn’t leave anything behind before they decided walking out of the dining area. 

Just then, Yena saw something that made her stopped on her track, forgetting the idea of not making any interaction with Yuri. For the first time, her members seemed to know what Yena was going to do at what was going on in front of them. They saw Hyunjin walking towards Yuri with a strawberry cake on his hand. Yena knew this kind of act all too well. It’s a way to get someone’s number or to give one, if not he would try to get closer to Yuri which she wouldn’t let him do it easily. She would still be his competition although she would still keep options open for Yuri because in the end, everything was Yuri’s choice and not hers.

Yena changed the plan to just walk by Yuri’s table and instead she stopped when they reached Yuri’s table. The younger seemed not to notice her presence just yet. When Sakura, Hitomi and Chaeyeon, who sat across Yuri, Hyewon and Wonyoung, had seen her and their expression changed, turning a bit more serious. At that moment, she accidentally caught the conversation from Yuri.

“Sadly we don’t get the strawberry cake.”

Maybe that was why Hyunjin was taking this chance.

“We could just buy one after this or maybe tomorrow after concert.” Hyewon, the foodie of the group, said which was agreed by the group with a nod.

Yena could see Hyunjin’s determination in his eyes. She knew even with their presence, he would go ahead with his plan. Stopping across them, he spared a glance at them for a moment before to Rose’s. He stood for a moment and clearly his presence caught Yuri’s attention being one of those who faced him. 

“Um.. Yuri-ssi…” Hyunjin started before stretching his hand out to hand the slice of strawberry cake. “Here.”

Yuri was going to reply him. Just then someone slid a slice of strawberry cake, placing it on the table in front of Yuri. Instantly, Yuri turned around to see tired Yena who stared into Yuri’s eyes boringly. The older was still tired after-all. Yena saluted herself for being able to keep self control and not showing her jealousy towards Hyunjin. She couldn’t and she shouldn’t. Yena didn’t say anything while Yuri gave her a confused look before Yuri’s gaze turned into a more understanding one. Yena then gave the younger a weak smile before walking away with her members without talking about anything. The two once again played the silent game.

Yuri looked at the back of Yena until the older was in some distance from them before she looked at Hyunjin who’s still standing in front of her. There’s a slight disheartened look on the his face that he tried to mask. He clearly felt threatened by Yena. First, he knew Yena had that charm especially towards the ladies. Second, he could see Yuri clearly was more interested in Yena than him. What he and others who had interest in Yena or Yuri didn’t know was how long the history the two had.

“I’m really sorry. But as you could see, I have mine already.” Yuri politely declined and her members gave Hyunjin an apologetic smile. 

“Go ahead and enjoy yours.” Yuri slightly bowed towards Hyunjin. Hopefully the rejection didn’t offend him.

Yuri opened the plastic cover to her slice of strawberry cake and she took the fork to cut it into half. She placed half of it onto a small plate on her tray before she covered the other half piece of the cake with the plastic cover. She then stood up and took a clean plastic fork with her as she made a small run, chasing after the familiar back of the person she missed the most.

Hyewon could see the look in Hyunjin’s eyes. She understood that feelings all too well. She felt the same. They had lost before the fight even started. The pain on how they could only watch the back of the person they liked as she ran towards her particular other. However, what Hyunjin felt probably wasn’t as huge as hers as the latter would most probably just lose the chance in getting closer to Yuri. Meanwhile, she was quite the opposite. She would remain by Yuri’s side even if what she saw would hurt her heart on daily basis, the never-ending pain that she was willing to endure for Yuri.

Yena heard the footsteps coming closer to her, the small echo turned louder as the person getting nearer to her. When the footsteps stopped, she had guessed that the person was behind her by now. Stopping her walk with her members, making her to be the one left out, she turned around to find Yuri, the least expected person for her because she thought it was one of the girls who had a crush on her again and Yuri had her hand stopped mid-air because Yena suddenly turned around. Instantly, Yena had a confused look on her face, wondering why Yuri put a chase on her. When she caught gaze of the half sliced strawberry cake, she couldn’t help but smile at it. The memory of when they were kids coming back to her. Yena looked at Yuri, finding Yuri was giving her a really warm gaze and the gaze that she could see on the young Yuri, the gaze that she always received whenever the younger looked at her. It seemed that both of them were going to that time. 

Everything started with their random talk on what was their favourite cake. Yuri came up with strawberry cake and ever since then, it became Yena’s favourite too. If Yena’s parents asked what cake she wanted, it would be strawberry ones so she could share it with Yuri. Sometimes, it would be Yuri who brought the cake to Yena’s room or Yena would eat it when Yuri told her that she had a strawberry cake with her. One thing for sure, the two would always wait for one another before eating it.

Today was just one of those days. Yena was running as fast as her small legs could towards the other wing of the hospital. She had been visiting that place way too much lately. Ever since she met Yuri and became best friend, she often visited Yuri and at the same time visited the younger’s father. Sometimes, she waited there too for Yuri if the younger hadn’t come to the hospital.

Today, it’s just like a normal visit, the little difference would be for her coming to share her strawberry cake with the younger. It’s not a new routine. They literally shared everything they had ever since they became friends, either it’s as small as candies to something bigger like cake. One wouldn’t eat without sharing it with the other. To people who saw it, always found it really cute. The two had sort of become well known among the nurses in respective department.

Yena reached the Intensive Care Unit and she scanned the waiting room for the younger or Mrs Jo while holding her strawberry cake. Finding that they weren’t there, she walked further in. She greeted the nurse whom had known her as Yuri’s best friend and also the Pediatrics patient.

“Nurse Lee, has Yuri come today?” 

The nurse tried to recall the event for the day on whether she had seen Yuri that day or not. She didn’t remember to see Yuri but she would ask her friends for Yena, just in case others caught sight of Yuri when she didn’t.

“Any of you see Yuri today?” Nurse Lee asked her friends that were walking by and those on the nurse station.

“I think I saw her walking out earlier. Just a moment ago, most probably go to find her friend.” One of the nurse said. 

“Thanks.” Yena said it a bit loudly so the nurses around could hear it and she directly made a run back to her room while making sure that she held the cake securely, didn’t want to ruin it on her way back.

Yena ran as fast as her small feet could bring her. She was excited, as always, at the idea of spending time with Yuri. She wished to catch Yuri on her way back and if Yuri reached her room first, she didn’t want Yuri to wait for her for too long.

When Yena reached her room, she pulled the door open but was greeted with an empty room. She stood by the door for a moment to catch her breath.

“Hmm.. it’s weird. Where could she go?” Yena muttered under her breath.

Just when she was going to turn around to continue looking for Yuri, she felt someone poking her back. She turned around and she saw Yuri holding a strawberry cake.

“Unnie, why are you running around?” Yuri asked, the older.

Yena directly grinned sheepishly. She didn’t know Yuri would see her running towards her room just to look for the younger. 

“Why didn’t you stop me?” Yena replied with another question.

“I was actually heading back since you’re not in the room, knowing you must be looking for me. Then, I heard someone running, so I turned to look. Just when I wanted to call you, you had gone from the view.” Yuri explained. The two seemingly had forgotten about the cake they were holding on their hand.

“Anyways, I look for you to share the strawberry cake.” The two continued the conversation and showed their strawberry cake to one another.

The two kids smiled at one another at how they mirrored one another’s move and at the same time said the same words. Yena took a hold of Yuri’s wrist and brought the latter further into her room. She placed the cake on the bed carefully before she climbed back to the bed. 

“Come. Let’s eat.” 

Yuri climbed up the bed and sat down next to Yena. The first thing that the two did after opening the plastic cover of the cake was dividing the cake into half as perfect as they could. If one ended up had a bigger size than the other half, they would always give it to the other to eat. It’s something they did without discussing it with one another.

The two ate each half of their cake while watching the show playing on the TV. They would talk in between about their day or laughed at each other face that was stained with the cream from being a messy eater before taking a tissue to wipe one another’s face. Occasionally, Yena would feed Yuri her cake and Yuri would do the same. It had become a routine when it came to them feeding one another. Once they finished their half, they would exchange their cake, a way to try both cake. The time spent together always brought smile to their face as their whole day would be filled with happiness.

“Go and eat.” Yena simply said and Yuri stretched her hand more, slightly pushing the cake to Yena to asked the older to receive it.

Yena was a bit reluctant in receiving it because she didn’t want others to think that she was letting Yuri get close to her when she kept distance from others or that Yuri to be like those who had crush on her. However, from the determination on the younger’s eyes, she knew she wouldn’t be able to get away without receiving it first. At least, from that gesture, she knew Yuri was slowly acknowledging and trusting her.

“Take it, unnie. I will be fine.” Yuri’s words sort of assured the older that it would be okay, their interaction. 

Yuri understood though the reluctance behind Yena’s action. They probably wouldn’t interact if the older didn’t give her the strawberry cake since they promised to take their time. If there’s gossip coming out of this interaction, she would just continue to ignore Yena until it completely died down.

Yuri could see that Yena’s group finally noticing that Yena wasn’t with them and they were looking at the two of them. Yuri politely gave a bow to them who’s a few feet away from the two of them as a greeting. She heard Yena sighed and the cake on her hold was taken by Yena eventually. Yuri looked at Yena and smiled, happy that the older decided to take it.

“Don’t forget to enjoy the cake, unnie. And take proper rest if you could.” Yuri told Yena before the younger turned around and walked back to her members. Clearly, Yuri noticed the exhaustion in Yena’s eyes. It’s something that’s easy to notice. She just hoped that Yena would rest properly. She didn’t want the older to fall sick because of it.

“I will.” Yena managed to whisper before she watched Yuri walked away from her towards her members. She turned around and found her members were giving her a playful and teasing look. She walked towards them, holding the strawberry cake with heart swell in happiness. It’s a simple and yet meaningful gesture from Yuri. It’s like telling Yena that Yuri didn’t forget about what’s going on when they were kids. It’s enough for Yena, a small acknowledgement like this.

***

It was Rose’s turn rehearsing for tomorrow’s concert. The music was playing as they moved around the stage, getting comfortable with it as they danced around with the music booming in the background. There were some groups loitering around near the stage to watch or to support. Some were friends of Rose and some were just coincidentally passing by or talking with the other groups that came to watch Rose rehearsing. Violet was one of them.

The stage set up  was like a Y shape with diamond at the middle. Rose was standing in the middle of that diamond. The group was moving around, getting used to the stage and made it suitable to their dance formation, making sure that it was perfect for the fans or those who watched it. The group always treated rehearsal as if it was a real performance as always.

Yuri slid backwards as Hitomi moved up front while she was far at the back. When she was supposed to move around once more as they changed their formation, she twisted her ankle when her shoe lace stuck in the small gap of the stage, in result making her shoe stuck in place too. What happened next was unexpected to anyone and Yuri herself. She felt slight pain from her ankle and tried to catch her balance but she couldn’t as her shoes stayed rooted in place. The next thing she knew, she was thrown off stage from trying to pull her shoe off while trying to catch herself and she saw Wonyoung tried to help her being the one seeing it and also closer to her at that moment. She saw the panicked look from Wonyoung as she fell off the stage and she was scared. Yuri closed her eyes and braced for impact. Yuri could hear people shouting her name from every direction. The silence engulfed her, she could hear nothing but her own heartbeat as she was free falling. The last thing that broken the silence when the sound of body drop down the floor.

“Call an ambulance!!!!”