Jinsoul realized that the silence of nighttime is much, much heavier than silence in the day. Somehow, the darkness coming through her window made the lack of sound in the room more eerie. Really, she hadn’t slept at all that night, in that space between being half asleep, and half awake. She so desperately didn’t want to waste her last day being sad, tired, broken, but it seemed like that was her fate, no matter what she did. 

Jinsoul wasn’t sure if the light finally coming into her room through the window was painful or utter relief: a blessing, because this torturous night was finally over, or complete pain, because her time was running out, and she could no longer escape her goodbyes. 

So she just laid in bed as long as she could, trying to exist in that in between space where she could avoid everything bad. The only thing that finally interrupted the silent night spent almost in torture was the loud buzzing of Jinsoul's phone.

Tomorrow is the big day honey! Don't forget to start packing now , her mother texted.

that ; she could pack tomorrow morning. She didn't respond, shifting over in her bed to bury her face in the pillow, trying to catch a few more minutes of sleep before, inevitably, someone burst into the room without knocking. Of course, that was the moment when that exact thing decided to happen.

"Oh my god Jinsoul it's your last day! We're all going to miss you so much," Chaewon said loudly, jumping on top of the small girl. She smiled hesitantly as the other girls got on the bed as well and gave her a hug. 

"Get off, Jinsoul's probably having a hard enough time as it is," Jungeun spoke with annoyance in her voice. The other girls sighed, sitting in their usual spots around the room. Jungeun crawled into bed next to Jinsoul, sitting so that Jinsoul was in between her legs, resting her back against Jungeun's chest. Jungeun rested her head on Jinsoul's shoulder, playing with her delicate fingers.

The worst part of all of this had been not waking up with Jungeun beside her. They’d been spending the last few nights together, and it felt so unnatural without the warmth and weight of her sweet girlfriend beside her. But what hurt the most was seeing that Jungeun was just as broken as herself. She never, ever wanted her sweet girlfriend to hurt like this. 

The room was silent, the weight of what was happening tomorrow making all of them feel like pure . Eventually, Yeojin sighed.

"So, are we going to make Jinsoul's last day here really badly, or are we going to at least try to have some fun?" Yeojin asked.

"I brought candy. Maybe that will make things less," Vivi responded, dumping a bunch of twix and milky way bars onto the bed. Everyone lazily grabbed a few and brought them back to their spots. 

"So, um, where are you going to be living?" Haseul asked Jinsoul.

"It's this place called Vallejo. It's in California, near San Francisco," Jinsoul responded. Everyone in the room groaned.

"Why is it so far?" Hyejoo whined. Jinsoul shrugged, stuffing a twix bar into . Jungeun wrapped her arms around Jinsoul's small frame, kissing her neck lightly. When Hyejoo gave them a look, Jungeun shot the dirtiest look he could possibly imagine right back.

"Wait, how long were you here before you met us?" Yerim asked.

"Oh, one or two days," Jinsoul responded.

"What the did you do without us?" Chaewon said.

"Well, the first night I just sort of ate food, and the second day I met Yeojin," Jinsoul answered

"What did you two do together?" Jungeun asked.

"We just watched a movie and ate froyo at the creepy froyo place in the basement,” Yeojin explained.

"There’s a froyo place here?” Haseul asked with a loud gasp. 

“Maybe if we actually left the damn arcade before we met Jinsoul, we would’ve learned that ages ago,” Chaewon rebutted spitefully. 

“Oh yeah, the froyo place is creepy,” Vivi mumbled. 

“Wait, why?” Jungeun asked. 

“The workers were kinda mean. They just sort of...stared at us,” Jinsoul explained.

“There’s a theory that they are all members of a satanic cult,” Vivi explained. 

“Oh my gosh!” Chaewon cried. 

“We definitely have to go then...” Hyejoo added. 

“I don’t know if that’s such a good idea. An integral part of the conspiracy theory is that the manager is the head and he’s in a polygamist relationship with all the female employees. And you have to date him if you join the cult,” Vivi said. 

“Hm...maybe not then,” Hyejoo mumbled. 

“Well, we should at least try the satanic froyo,” Chaewon said, and everyone started laughing.

"What the , Chaewon," Jungeun said, smiling. “And what the , Jinsoul and Yeojin, why did you go there?”

"I don't know, things were weird then!” Jinsoul whined.

“And how were we supposed to know that it was a front for a cult?" Yeojin answered. 

“I’m just joking,” Jungeun mumbled,smiling and kissing Jinsoul on the cheek. "Well, you're mine now, I’ll keep you safe from weird cults," Jungeun whispered to Jinsoul. Jinsoul leaned into her touch, smiling softly. Jungeun looked at her, trying to remember this moment forever. 

"Of course Jungeunnie. I'll always be yours." 

"Ugh, why are you two so cute together?" Yerim whined. Jungeun and Jinsoul laughed softly.

"You're just jealous," Jungeun responded.

"You wish," Yerim retorted. Everyone laughed again, the sound filling the room. When the laughter died down, Haseul spoke.

"Do you want us to help you pack?" Haseul asked.

"No thanks. I don't even want to think about that until tomorrow." Everyone laughed again but this time, the sound didn't fill the room. 

~~~~~~~~~~

The rest of the day was spent half in silence, half in laughter, as memories from the last two weeks were retold, interspersed with silences. They weren't awkward at all, just sad, as if the previous laughter was just putting off their oncoming sadness. As much as the girls would've liked to stay the night, their parents called, and forced them to leave the large casino.

“Come on, just an hour more!” Hyejoo whined into the phone. “It’s our best friend’s last day here!” Jinsoul almost sobbed hearing Hyejoo call Jinsoul her best friend, but felt herself become more at ease when she heard the final sigh and acquiescence of Hyejoo and Jungeun’s grandmother. With a smile and a quick thanks, Hyejoo hung up. 

“Alright, we’ve got some more time. Ladies, let’s head out.” 

“Wait, what?” Jungeun asked. 

“Do you really think we’d try and usurp your last hour with your girlfriend? Come on. Let’s go,” Hyejoo answered, and everyone but Jungeun and Jinsoul made to head out. 

Jinsoul could see tears fill Jungeun’s eyes and Jinsoul knew that although all the girls wanted that extra time with her, her sister knew how much this love meant to them. 

The girls all went to the door and Jinsoul gave them each tight hugs, trying not to absolutely fall apart. But they all understood, so completely, so that Jinsoul felt comfortable enough letting a few tears down her cheeks.

"Jinsoul?" Jungeun spoke as the other girls left the room, Jinsoul shutting the door behind them. 

“Thank god you’re here,” Jinsoul breathed out as Jungeun wrapped her arms around her, a sweet back hug, kissing her cheek ever gently. 

“I...I didn’t expect my sister to do something like that for me, and think something like that all the way through. I guess I should think better of her, you know...she loves you a lot. They all do. She...she said the other day that you’re the best thing that’s happened to our group. You make me...so happy. And she says it makes everything better.” 

“Don’t make me even more sad,” Jinsoul whispered. 

“I-I’m sorry...” 

“N-no...I guess we should share these things. Now’s the time, you know. Let’s go sit on the bed though.” 

“Agreed.” The two went back and sat down on the bed, sitting across from each other, only daring the slightest of touches or else they might break. 

And so they spent the next hour or so discussing their own personal life and love, the feelings and experiences they shared together, a cacophony of first. First time, first love, first everything. It felt so right, with the two of them, age sixteen, but so wrong, only in that it was all ending. They squeezed each other’s hands and made forever kind of promises. What else could they do, with just an hour before they were torn apart indefinitely? It hurt, but Jinsoul promised herself she’d remember it forever.

Jungeun whined loudly when her phone buzzed, taking a second to peer down at it. “...it’s time to go...I-I can’t stall any longer-” 

“It’s okay,” Jinsoul breathed out, getting out of the bed to walk her to the door. “It’s okay.”

They went over to the doorway, just standing there for a few moments, not even daring to look at each other. 

As Jinsoul turned around to face her girlfriend, she scooped her up in a large hug.

"I love you, I'll always love you, please never forget that, and promise you'll wait for me, okay?" Jungeun whispered to Jinsoul.

"I love you too, so much. I'll wait forever, and ever, and ever," Jinsoul responded, pulling away from the hug.

"When I see you again, I am going to marry you," Jinsoul said firmly. Jungeun's eyes widened as he broke into a large grin, kissing Jinsoul firmly on the lips.

"Is that a promise?" Jungeun asked.

"It is," Jinsoul responded, shutting the door behind her and closing her eyes, trying to refrain from crying until she reached her pillow.