It was Thursday morning and normally Jennie would be at the studio or running an errand somewhere, she was the kind of person that needed something to do. Yes she liked to be lazy every once in a while but not for 30 consecutive days. Because that’s how long it has been since she was in this prison. 30 days, she has it all marked up on her mental calendar, scratching day by day like an inmate.

 

She knows is for the best, and she trying to endure it as much as she can because she has to, she has no other choice. If she wanted a chance to meet her little girl she needed to. She was diagnosed with placenta previa a month ago which meant her and the baby where at a very high risk, so she had to avoid moving or stressing as much as possible. She still remembered the pain both physical and emotional she felt when they found out.

 

“Don’t you know there’s a rule about letting pregnant women lie?”

 

“Is that ‘lie’ and in ‘sleep’ or ‘lie’ as in ‘of course you are the baby’s father’?

 

Chaeyoung was walking Jennie from their the room to where their unfinished nursery was meant to be, she had one arm around her waist and another covering her eyes, carefully guiding her down the hallway.

 

“Okay smartass seeing as you are lacking an important instrument to make babies I think is more than obvious you are not the father.” Jennie tells her removing the hand from her eyes once they had stopped in front of the closed nursery. “It was also ‘lie’ as in ‘sleep’ by the way.”

 

Chaeyoung chuckled. “You know you’re gonna feel really bad about that when you see my surprise.”

 

“Really?” The brunette looked up at her squinting her eyes in suspicion. “Has the surprise anything to do with the reason you didn’t come to bed last night?”

 

The blonde smirked. “Maybe. You ready to have your world rocked?”

 

Jennie’s smile dropped to a frown, her hand going to her stomach when she felt a stab of pain swaying a bit in place. “Not so much.” She whispered.

 

“You got morning sickness again.” The blonde stated looking at her in worry.

 

“Sure, let’s go with that… ugh!” All of a sudden the brunette collapsed, holding her stomach harshly, the blonde keeping her up and lowering them on the floor.

 

“Jennie! What’s wrong?” She ask holding her close, looking at her with worry feeling the way the brunette was pulling on her shirt due to the pain, crying against her chest.

 

Surprise.

 

The return from the hospital to their home was quiet, somber, Chaeyoung keeping Jennie close at all times, while the brunette leaned against her wearing Chaeyoung’s zip up hoodie around her, the smell of her perfume wrapping her in comfort.

 

When they get home, Jennie leans forward to rest her hands on the back of the couch looking down, the blonde approaching from the back one hand traveling from her lower back up to her shoulder wrapping her in a side hug.

 

“Let’s get you to bed, The doctor said you need to take it easy.”

 

“I want to see the surprise.”

 

“I don’t think that’s a good idea.”

 

“I want to see it.” She said in a tone that meant it was not up for discussion. The blonde could only sigh and nod, taking her to the nursery.

 

When Jennie opens the door surprise fills her face, she looks around to a completely finished nursery, the drawings Jennie made visible on the wall, the song lyrics they both had picked engraved with vinyl on the wall next to the built crib. A rocking chair in the corner, shelves filled with all the necessities on top of the changing table two little white onesies resting on it.

 

Jennie walks in looking around, taking in every detail.

 

“Like you said, this is our house now.” The blonde said softly behind her, leaning against the door.

 

“It’s beautiful.” She said just as softly. “We haven’t even picked out names yet. I was thinking Ella for a little girl.”

 

“Come on. Don’t…”

 

“Or maybe Davis for a boy… Davis Park.”

 

“Jennie…”

 

The brunette ignores her and walks further into the nursery. “When I think about all the time I thought maybe I didn’t want a baby like...I… like I couldn’t handle it…”

 

“Jennie, it doesn’t work like that. The universe doesn’t punish you for being afraid.” The blonde said walking in, standing behind the brunette.

 

“I know, I just…” She stopped her eyes getting glassy as she sees the onesie on the changing table, it was white and it had ‘I love mommy.’ written on a colorful playful font in it, not being able to hold it in any longer, her eyes filled with tears, her hands pulling the onesie towards her chest a sob came out of .

 

The blonde reaches forwards turning her around to hug her close, the brunette hiding her face on her chest as more sob and tears came out, the blonde holding her close swallowing her own tears.

 

“Shhh… it’s going to be okay.”

 

It’s been a month since then and Jennie was going crazy. She was following the doctors orders, she really was, even getting scolded by her wife if she didn’t but that didn’t mean it was easy, oh no, for someone like Jennie staying cooped up in her house, only moving from the bed to the couch throughout the day was like a punishment.

 

She grabs a paper airplane from the pile she had made earlier resting next to her on the bed, and throws it watching as it flew past the trash can and into the floor, sighing in annoyance she grabs another one and throws it harder watching as flies right to the door, a hand catching it before it could fall.

 

A frowning blonde looks at it and unfolds it reading it’s contents. “Uh, are these my songs?”

 

“The drafts, nothing finished or that you have used in the past six years, and I cannot be held accountable because baby and me have gone completely bed-rest stir crazy and...why are you smiling?” She said looking at hot the blonde was biting on her lower lip to keep from smiling further, her head nodding towards the mirror next to the closet. “Oh, great.” She said sarcastically looking at her current look. “I have permanent bed head, and you’re laughing at me.”

 

The blonde chuckled and walked towards the bed, her hand going around Jennie’s waist when the brunette kneels at the edge. “Look, I’m sorry, I know how hard it is being cooped up in the house is.”

 

“Hard?” The brunette asked, taking the magazine in her hand and shoving it in Chaeyoung’s chest. “I have read this month's issue if Sooya’s magazine cover to cover five times.”

 

“Wow.”

 

“Just stay and tell stories about life on the outside.” She smiled cutely, her hands going up from the blonde’s chest to rest behind her neck.

 

“I can’t.” The blonde said with a small wince. “I’m working on something.”

 

Jennie gasped, annoyed, hitting her lightly on the chest the blonde. “Why have you been so weird lately off in the garage and…” The blonde looks at her amused and holds her hands against her chest to keep her from hitting her again. All of a sudden Jennie raised an eyebrow. “You’re making me a present. Are you making the baby a present? Is it a present for me and the baby?”

 

“You know what? You’re right.” The blonde said pulling away.

 

“Well yeah, of course I’m right so just stay and let me guess.” She said pulling the blonde closer to her again.

 

“No, no.” Chaeyoung chuckled pulling away again. “I mean, you’re right. You’re going completely crazy.” And with that the blonde turned around and walked out of the room.

 

“Crazy people should not be left alone!”

 

“A while back I had a dream… that something happened to you. It got me thinking about my life without you and I…” The blonde looked up to ceiling as if praying to the big guy up there for strength, she was sitting on the reclining chair in the nursery holding a squirrel plushie in her hands. “I can’t...No. I can’t live that life.” She closed her eyes and shook her head tears falling down. “I can’t.” Her eyes opened and looked at the brunette pleadingly. “You talk about how I’m always saving you Jennie and I can’t save you from this.”

 

This is the first time in a three weeks that the blonde had opened up, she had been Jennie’s rock and it’s only right she had opened up about the whole thing. Jennie might be aware that her life was at risk but most of all her baby was. But Chaeyoung… Chaeyoung had to deal with the harsh reality that both her baby and her wife were at risk, that it can come a point where she will have to choose or in the worse case scenario she would lose them both.

 

The brunette walked quickly to the blonde and sat on her lap, hands on each side of her face, making sure their gazes are on one another. “We can’t think like that okay? Look at all the stuff you and I have survived together? I mean, car crashes, love triangles, heart attacks.

Are we really gonna let some doctor lay odds on us? And okay, even if something does happen to me you’re gonna be okay. And you can raise this baby on your own, I know you can.”

 

Chaeyoung shakes her head again. “And how am I supposed to feel about the child that took you away from me?”

 

“I don’t worry about that for a second.” Jennie said with conviction. “Because you are not that person. And you will never, ever, ever be on your own.“ She said her hand caressing her lovers face lovingly. “You have Seulgi and Irene and Jisoo.”

 

“I can’t accept that our story doesn’t have a good ending.”

 

Jennie smiled. “Our story already has the greatest ending. No matter what. ‘Cause we’re together.” The brunette smiles even bigger as she grabs the blonde’s hand to press it against her stomach. “She’s kicking hard. Do you feel that?”

 

The blonde smiles as even more tears run down her cheeks. “Yeah.”

 

“It’s okay for you to love this baby. It doesn’t mean you don’t love me.”

 

“I can’t live without you, Jennie.”

 

“You don’t have to.” Jennie presses her forehead against the blonde’s while her wife wraps her arms around her waist. “You’re not going to. I know it. I can feel it. We are gonna live happily ever after. All three of us.”

 

“Knock, Knock.” Irene leaned her head from the door before walking in. “Brought you this month’s issue of Sooya Magazine.”

 

Jennie was laying on the bed, sitting halfway looking up at the ceiling. “Our ceiling fan does 147 rotations a minute.”

 

“Well that answers my question about how mama’s doing. How’s baby?” Her friend asking walking in and taking a seat on the bed.

 

“Baby is kicking, baby is growing. The doctor says we’re doing good.” She responded as she sat up.

 

“Good, that’s what aunty Irene likes to hear.” The raven then reached out to touch Jennie’s belly leaning forward. “Good job in there kiddo.” She said with a smile, before looking at Jennie again. “Now, how’s the project going?”

 

“I’ve drawn the second to last panels today.” The project itself was a compilation of various things, Jennie was preparing for the worst, as much as it pain her if she had to leave this world she wants to leave her baby something to remember her by, something to let her know she was loved immensely by one of her mom.

 

Thing # 1 Was a series of drawings, she was getting help from Seulgi to fix them up and colored them, and the drawings were comic style panels of important moments in her life, most of all her baby’s parents life.

 

She reached to the bottom drawer of her bedside table to pull out a folder giving it to Irene, the raven girl opened it after getting permission and smiled at the panels

 

“This was the night we won.” The raven said, her hand tracing the fine lines, the drawing of Jennie and Chaeyoung holding each other with the dialogue bubble above Chaeyoung’s head… ‘It’s you Jennie.’

 

“It was also the night we almost lost you guys, baby needs to know both her aunt and mommy are badass survivors.” Jennie said proudly, at the same time wondering if maybe the same fear Jennie had that night is the same Chaeyoung must be feeling right now.

 

“And how’s the telling Chaeyoung about this going?” She then asked placing the folder into jer purse.

 

Jennie’s smile faltered a bit, her hand playing with the sheets. “I told her last night. She didn’t take it well.” She said. “She barely talks about it as it is so… I don’t know” She shrugged with a sad smile. “I guess this just helped to further increase her fear.”

 

Irene sighed and wrapped around her friend pulling her into a side hug. “I’m sure she just needs time to process it. Knowing her she’ll be helping you with it by tomorrow.”

 

“Yeah, let’s hope so.”

 

“And how is telling your best friend going?”

 

This time it was Jennie’s turn to sigh. “I haven’t told her either she’s been so happy lately and I don’t want to ruin that.”

 

“Oh, Jennie. You can’t spare every body’s pain, whether is now or later it will hurt either way.”

 

“I know…”

 

——————————

 

Chaeyoung was in the garage, the same place she had been for the past week. Jennie was right, she was making her a surprise. She was able to get Jennie’s old car from the garage her father had stored it to her house. The same she drove in high school. a black 1963 Mercury Comet. Jennie used to love car, and it was that same car that broke down in the middle of the road, the reason why her and Chaeyoung started talking in the first place.

 

She was working on it, on her own, with her dad helping her via facetime if she ever ran into a problem she wasn’t quite sure how to fix. In her mind she wanted to give Jennie something to look forward to, a reason to not give up. She sees how Jennie gets about the whole thing, sees the worry on the face, the melancholic look whenever she goes into the nursery… and Chaeyoung wasn’t feeling much better, so fixing the car was her own way of dealing with the situation without burdening Jennie more than she had too.

 

“Yo.”

 

“Hey.” The blonde raised her head from where it was buried in the engine to greet her friend.

 

“Auntie Chae, can I sit in the car?”

 

“Better yet, why don’t you help pick everything in there and put it here, huh?” She gave Mia, a plastic box and opened up the door so she could get in.

“Don’t touch or move anything that looks important, bug.” Lisa tells her before leaning back against the car, her friend doing the same thing. “So… how you doing chip?”

 

Chaeyoung looked down at her hands which where playing with a greased up wrench. “I’m doing well I guess. Jennie’s been happier lately.”

 

“I didn’t ask about Jennie, I’m asking you how you feel?” Her friend said pointing at the blonde.

 

The blonde exhales. “It’s… weird how I’m approaching what is supposed to be the most exciting moment of my life any all I feel is… complete and utter fear.” She throws the wrench on her tool box and frowns. “And then all of these questions just keep coming up, like what if something happens to Jennie? What if something happens to the baby? What if… what if I had to choose? I just… how did we got this far?”

 

“You got this far, because is what Jennie wanted.” Lisa explained, crossing her arms. “It’s like when your mom found about your heart… you said she let you right? Because she knew you wanted it… I don’t know, I imagine as a mom that must’ve been hard but she knew you wanted to do it so she just held her breath and let it go.”

 

“Yeah, I think everybody did.”

 

“Well then there you go, maybe this is the time where you hold your breath from Jennie.”

 

Breathe on me, Be like you used to be, Breathe on me

 

“Ya know, how incredible coincidental that this song is playing while I give you, your birthday gift.” The brunette placed a pair of tickets on the shorter girls extended hands. “You can open your eyes now.”

 

Jennie’s eyes open wide in surprise, opening as she looked at the tickets in her hand. “The cure?!”

 

“Tonight in Atlanta.”

 

“But I’m going back to LA with Jisoo today.” Jennie said sending a questioning glance to her girlfriend.

 

“No you are not, Jisoo is having her own extended goodbye with Taehyung, so you and I are going to Atlanta.” The brunette said smirking. “Jisoo said you’ll leave in the morning… I mean, unless you don’t want to go.”

 

“No, no, no, I’m going.” Jennie said smiling before leaning closer. “And you are going to get into a hell a lot more than a concert for getting this tickets.”

 

“May I also ask when are you guys telling my girlfriend about this?” Lisa asked. “You know I’m very bad at keeping secrets.”

 

“You can ask my wife, she promised she’d do it today.”

 

“Park Chaeyoung!”

 

The blonde winced. “And I guess it already happened.”

 

“Oh , oh , bug let’s go.” The thai girl picked up her sister in a hurry, looking around making sure no evidence of her presence was left. “I’m leaving I was never here.”

 

“Park Chaeyoung.”

 

Just as Lisa got out the door the blonde turns around to see her best friend standing by the door with her hands on her hips.

 

“Thanks for the warning!” She yelled to Jennie.

 

“I tried to stop her but I couldn’t, bed rest remember?!”

 

“Park Chaeyoung you better explain yourself and you better do it now.” Jisoo said angrily stabbing her finger on her friend’s chest.

 

“Ow! Why are you yelling at me for? She’s the one who didn’t want me to tell you.” She said, excusing herself and rubbing on her chest.

 

“Because she’s pregnant and delicate and I cannot yell at her right now, so you will have to do until I get home to yell at Lisa.”

 

“Lisa doesn’t know.”

 

Jisoo scuffed. “Oh please, she has been hiding something for weeks, besides that’s Mia’s Nintendo switch right now so don’t lie.”

 

“Sorry.” The blonde said sheepishly.

 

Jisoo sighs as her anger dies down. “Just talk to me Chaeyoungie what… what does it all mean?”

 

Chaeyoung’s eyes flickered with fear and worry. “It means we could lose her, Jisoo. Her and the baby.”

 

“Oh, Chae.” Jisoo pulls her friend in for a hug, her own eyes starting to water from the revelation, she didn’t understood it, placenta previa, bleeding out, but it didn’t matter, because at the end both her and Jennie said the same thing. They could lose them.

“I’m so scared, Chu. I don’t know what to do.”

 

“Hey, shhh… Chaeyoungie, I’m here, you are not alone. I’m gonna help you guys get through this okay? We are go through with this, together.”

 

“Yes we will.”

 

Chaeyoung opened her eyes feeling a tiny presence behind her, a very round belly poking her back. “You are supposed to be in bed.”

 

“You were crying, you both were, I can’t let you cry without me.” Jennie said against Chaeyoung’s shoulder.

 

“I swear you are both idiots.” Said Jisoo her arms moving to wrap around Jennie to.

 

“But you love us anyways.” The tiny brunette said as she pulled away. “Also is this my surprise, you are fixing my car?!”

 

“And that’s my queue to leave, expect me tomorrow, and probably everyday after that, we are keeping you entertained Jendukie and you Chaeyoungie I expect you to talk to me and not bottle everything up… alright bye!”

 

Both girls chuckled watching as their friend walks out of the garage, before settling down, Chaeyoung pulling Jennie closer to her, hands on her bump. caressing it softly with her thumbs.

 

“I’m sorry, I’ve been distant lately.” She apologized honestly. “The car was just an excuse.”

 

“I know baby.” The brunette placed one of her hands on top of her wife’s and the other on her cheek, looking up at her with a small smile. “I know you are trying to keep up a strong front for me, but baby you don’t have to.”

 

The blonde swallowed and her brows furrowed. “I just don’t know how to feel, I’m worried, I’m scared, and it’s probably nothing compared to how you feel but I…”

 

“Hey, Rosie. I appreciate the fact that you are being my rock right now, but baby, you are affected by this as much as I am.” She tells her thumb going back and forth on her cheek in a comforting manner. “We can share this burden, in fact I’m asking you to, the only way we can move forward is by working together… always remember?”

 

The blonde chuckled. “Yeah, always.” Pulling away the blonde sniffles and brings her treasure findings to Jennie. “I found something while cleaning up your car, maybe you can make a strip out of it?” She asked showing the brunette the old concert tickets.

 

“Oh my God! The best concert I never went to, I still can’t believe you pretended to like The Cure all those years.” The brunette said her hand swatting the blonde’s arms.

“I never said I loved The Cure, I said I loved kissing you to The Cure.” Chae clarified. “It’s different.”

 

Smiling the brunette admired the ticket pulling them closer so she could look at the properly the letters worn out due to time. “This was the best day of my life. Really good pie. We had our whole life in front of us.”

 

“Hey, we still do.” The blonde tells her, turning the brunette around so she could face her again.

 

“I know.” Jennie responded, her arms wrapping around the taller girls neck, “Well the cure is playing. Where’s my kissing?”

 

“I can’t believe I kept those tickets for six months… and I lost them in six hours.”

 

“You know what? Maybe we can go back to the door man and explain we really did have two tickets.”

 

Both girls were laying on the hood of Jennie’s car, Chaeyoung’s back against the window while Jennie snuggled beside her, looking up at the night sky.

 

“Yeah, I’m thinking he probably has heard that before. Sorry about the concert.”

 

“Who goes to a Sold out show anyway?” Jennie scoffed resting her head on the brunette’s shoulder. “Besides I only have one last night with you… unless you show up tomorrow with another surprise.”

 

“If that’s what it takes to keep you.” The brunette said honestly. “I’m gonna miss you.”

 

“Good.” She said pecking her lips. “Because I have a lot of dreams wrapped up in you. And it’s really hard to have a happily ever after all by yourself.” She joked adjusting herself a little so she could look at the brunette better. “Because we are gonna have that, Rosie. We are gonna get married, and we are gonna make a lot of babies in the backseat of this car. I promise, and I always keep my promise.”

 

Chaeyoung smiled as she tightened her hold. “Good, ‘cause i’m gonna hold you to it.”