C11: Letting Go

A week passes by and nothing out of the ordinary happens. In fact everything went back to its boring repetitiveness. Doyoung and I danced around each other again. But we were definitely closer after that night. Plus I was slowly falling for him little by little.

The oddest part from that night though was when I woke up. I hadn’t started my period like I thought I would. In fact I hadn’t had it since I can remember. It was odd. I would have to check with a doctor to find out.

At this very moment though I was staring at the twenty outgoing unanswered calls I have sent to Taeyong. He was ignoring me.

Which made it all the more obvious that he knew more than he told me.

My phone beeps and a message from Jaehyun pops up.

From: Jaehyun

To: Yooyeon

Can we meet up to talk things out?

I heave a sigh. As much as I wanted to continue to be friends with Jaehyun I just didn’t know if I could. I know he’s more than likely lying to me for a good reason but in the end a lie is a lie.

Jaehyun is a liar. So is Taeyong.

Another message comes in from jaehyun again.

From: Jaehyun

To: Yooyeon

You owe me this at least. You do realize how hard this is for me right? I am losing my best friend because of this.

I bite my lip holding back the sudden rush of tears that were threatening to spill out. I didn’t want to lose him but I knew I was going to have to end our friendship.

It wasn’t healthy for either of us.

And maybe someday after all of this passes by the two of us will meet again and put this situation behind us.

To: Jaehyun

From: Yooyeon

Fine.

-

“So this is how you’re going to end it?” Jaehyun chuckles sadly. “If I had known things would end up this way I wouldn’t have promised you the things I did before you did this to yourself.”

I swallow. “You can still tell me Jaehyun, it’s not too late.”

“The window for you to remember and for me to tell you has long since passed. I can’t live with it if I have to be the one to tell you. It’s not my place to tell you. It’s not anyone’s.” He shakes his head firmly.

“Then who will tell me? Because I’m not giving up until I know why I did it.” I shrug, a pit forming in my stomach as I knew this was most likely our final fight.

“Aren’t you dwelling in the past too much?” Jaehyun sighs, we sat across from each other at our local fast food place. The waitress has noticed our negative aura as soon as we sat down and had only been to check on us once in the twenty minutes we’ve been here.

I refrain from speaking. He’s the one who wanted to try and reconcile. At this point I wasn’t sure if we’d ever be friends again. He was surely going to say something to hurt me even more than I already am.

“You are spending so much time in the past whenever you and Doyoung are close now. Why not forget your past and start living towards the future. We don’t have all the time in the world, Yooyeon.” He leans forward almost desperate. “One day we’re all going to die but you’ll still be stuck in the past hoping to remember even an ounce of a memory from back then whenever you could be making new one’s.”

“You don’t know what it’s like, Jaehyun.” I say softly.

He snorts and mutters something I can’t hear under his breath. “If you continue this way you’re going to end up alone. You and I are already barely friends. Taeyong won’t talk to you. And you’re dragging Doyoung down that same path with Joh