I run while carrying my koto with me, my mind is in so much confusion right now I can't even think straight. Why is he here? Was it really real? Or am I still dreaming? I run until I reach the front of my house. I fling open the door and I drop my koto onto the ground. At this point I'm completely mentally and emotionally exhausted once again, and out of breath. I panting and I fall on my knees at the entrance of m house. My mother comes out after hearing the noise. She comes running towards me and kneels down.

 

"____________, what happened? Are you alright?" She asks me concerned.

 

I breath in deeply and try to steady my breathing.

 

"I'm fine... don't worry." I lie to her.

 

"Clearly something happened, you need to tell me. I can perhaps help you." My mother says.

 

I look at her and I had enough of all these emotional struggles finally. I decide it's time to let them out and I have my mother help me. 

 

"Remember that someone that I told you that I met on my trip?" I ask her.

 

"Yes, what happened? Did he come find you?" She asks me.

 

"I don't know if he came because he wanted to see me, but he is here... I met him but I ran away from him." I tell her truthfully.

 

"Why did you run away from him after meeting him?" She asks me calmly.

 

"I don't know actually.... I don't know why I ran away... He actually asked me something similar." I tell her.

 

She then sits down and looks at me.

 

"I don't know who this person is or what he's like, but since he asked you something similar to what I asked you, then he might want you to face your turmoils. I might have forgotten but who's the one that walked away?" She asked me.

 

"....... I did.... I walked away without actually telling him my feelings for him..." I tell her looking at the ground.

 

She then place a hand on my arm.

 

"Now I understand the whole story... So you ran away without telling him your feelings, but you also don't know his feelings. If there were a possibility that there could've been something in the time that you two have known each other, you abandoned that chance. You ran away from the chance of a possible happiness with him. You ran away already_________, since he's here now... don't run away again. Don't let that chance of happiness slip away from you again. Since you look so distraught and stressed out lately, I assume it's because of him? He must've been someone really special and important in your life." She asks me with a smile.

 

"How did you know?" I ask her surprised.

 

"A mother's intuition, besides I am a woman after all. Who's important in our life we know best, and our emotions takes over us like a storm when we love someone dearly. That's what makes us humans, we fear the unknown, we can love someone so much that it can hurt us. And when we lose someone we love dearly it can destroy is. You still love him don't you?" She asks me.

 

I look at her, my fear finally resolving slowly. My mind is beginning to clear up. 

 

"I do.. I love him so much, it pained me so much to part from him that day. I thought by letting him go it was for his happiness, because I thought I'll never stand on the same ground as him in life. I thought it was best for him." I tell her with tears in my eyes.

 

"Sometimes you have to think of your own happiness instead of others, you have to take the risk, believe in possibilities. If you love him, don't let him go this time. Don't run away from a possibility of happiness, grab onto it this time and don't let go." She tells me with a warm smile.

 

I finally realized what I have been doing. I've been running away from the one I love the most. It's true, I kept pushing him away from me because he's a great daiyokai, far beyond humanity. Much greater than what I am. But earlier he was right in front of me, in front of a mere human. Back then, it was I who always went up to him, but he walked up to me this time. I asked him what he's doing here, he said that in my state of mind if he told me would I even believe him. I want to hear his thoughts, I want to know why he's here. Was he really here for me? I made my decision not to run away from my feelings anymore, I'm going back. I smile to my mother.

 

"Don't wait up for me... and don't worry about me. Thank you mom for giving me this pep talk. I needed it." I say with a smile.

 

Without hearing what she has to say, I kick off my sandals. I get up and run out, back towards the flower field under the crescent moon. Without my sandals I can run faster, I didn't care about anything else at the moment. He said when I figure out what I'm running away from, he'll be there waiting. I pull out the hairpin that is just barely holding my hair together, my hair falls behind me and flies in the air as I run. I won't contain or restrain my feelings anymore, I'll let it flow out, I'll set them free. My heart is beating faster as I come closer to the field, as I run, I begin to think back on the thoughts of Sesshomaru. The fragrant olive perfume, him wiping my tears that night of my injuries, him saving me from the bandits, the closed window in the morning that I left a crack the night before. Was he here the whole time? Did he really save me out of compassion that night? Why did he come save me that night when he might have been doing something more important? Why did he wipe my tears that night? Why is he here? So many questions run throw my mind it's overwhelming, but I want to know the answers to them. I want to hear it from Sesshomaru. I want to hear those words that he kept back that day before we parted as friends. I run, I run until I see the flower field. I smile as I see it in front of me I run into the field until I reach the center of the field, but my smile slowly fades. He's not here.... he's not here anymore. I look around the field, but he's not here. He's wearing a white kimono, it stands out drastically in the dark field but I can't see him anymore. Despair starts to fill my chest gradually as I continue to look around. 

 

"He's gone.... he couldn't wait for me. Why would he waste his precious time on me..." I say with tears slowly forming in my eyes once again.

 

I look up at the moon above me and I close my eyes.

 

"I'll let my feelings out here now regardless if you are here or not. I love you from the bottom of my heart Sesshomaru, I don't want to run from my feelings anymore." I say out loud.

 

I'm literally on the verge of breaking down, when a gentle breeze blows across the field. I open my tears laced eyes, it feels so familiar. I turn around, and not far away is Sesshomaru. 

 

"Sesshomaru you came back... I thought you left." I say to him.

 

He stays silent for a few seconds but then shows a small smirk.

 

"I told you, I'll be waiting till you figure out when to stop running." He says.

 

"So you heard everything?" I ask him surprised.

 

"Every word." He replies with a small smile.

 

He was here the whole time. He's smiling a little, after hearing my love for him he's smiling. Is this a dream? Or am I seeing things again? Unknowingly I take a few steps forward. 

 

"Am I still dreaming? Are you actually here in front of me?" I ask him with tears slowly forming in my eyes. 

 

His amber eyes burns into mine as he looks at me.

 

"If it's a dream, you wouldn't be able to touch me. Aside from Rin, I would never allow another human to touch me. But since you're still lost in a dream you say... then it's time for you to wake up." He says flatly but his small smile still laced on his face. 

 

Sesshomaru is telling me this isn't a dream, he's really here in front of me. Smiling at me, a great Daiyokai who rarely shows any facial emotions is here in front of me smiling. He's telling me to wake up, he's telling me to go to him. Without knowing, I begin to run towards him. My hair flying behind as I towards my happiness, he's just standing there not moving, he's waiting for me, just like he said. When I finally have him in front of me, I throw myself at him and I wrap my arms around his neck and I hug him close to me, then my tears fall from my face. I let my emotions run loose, I don't want to contain them anymore. I completely break down while hugging him. This is the first time that I'm actually so close to him, his white hair against my bare arm feels so soft like silk. I can feel his warmth radiating off of his body. I cry while holding him, then I feel his left hand gently on the top of my head, and his right arm wrapped around my waist. He gently brush his hand down my hair. He then sits down in the middle of the flower field, guiding me down with him in his lap. I hold onto him still crying, he continues to smooth my hair. 

 

"I love you Sesshomaru, I love you so much." I say with tears.

 

"I know, I heard. " He says gently beside me holding me closely to him. 

 

I hold him tightly, not wanting to let him go again. But although I told him my feelings, I want to know what he feels. I then raise my head and I lean back a little to look at his divine face, our faces are just merely inches away from each other. His golden amber eyes looking at me, instead of seeing coldness, I feel warmth from them.

 

"All this time you were here the whole time? Did you really come here to see me?" I ask him looking into his beautiful amber eyes complimented by the magenta strips on his lids. 

 

He lifts a finger tipped with his long talons gently to my face and wipes my tears away. He then smiles.

 

"I was, and I came here to see you____________.  I quietly watched over you, but eventually I couldn't stand by and watch you fall into a spiral of darkness anymore." Sesshomaru says gently.

 

My heart starts to beat faster as I hear him say my name, I don't think I've heard him say my name till now.

 

"I'm just a weak human, why would you take the time to come here?" I ask him searching his eyes.

 

"Guess my small hints weren't enough." He says flatly again looking to the side.

 

"Hints?" I ask him confused.

 

His golden eyes flickers back to me, but he then lets out a small smile.

 

"Hints to show that I've taken interest in you. To show that I'm in love with you." He finally tells me.

 

My eyes go wide as I hear him say those three words. 

 

"You... love me?" I ask him again not believing what I'm here.

 

He looks at me with gentleness.

 

"I never imagined the day when I would fall in love with a mortal, but you, you finally made me do the impossible." He says tucking a strand of my messy hair behind my ear with his graceful fingers. 

 

"But you told me that you loved Rin..." I say to him.

 

"Before I met you, I did have growing feelings for Rin. Then you began to take over that spot. At first it started as an interest after hearing you play the koto on the hill that night, since you were a human I gave no thoughts to you. But then after talking to you and hearing your songs on the snowy field the first time, I would then stop by the field everytime after I visit Rin, hoping to hear you play and listen to you talk with such happiness. " He says. 

 

So he had feelings for me. I didn't know. He would wait for me to go to the field at night to listen to me play. No wonder Sango thought it was unusual for him to stay so long in the village after visiting Rin.

 

"Then Rin... is that why you didn't tell her your feelings?" I ask him.

 

"Indeed, because by then I knew I had fallen in love with you. But since you told me to see her off, I did for your happiness. I also figured out my feelings for Rin after seeing her arrive safely to her new home, that I can let her go with resolved feelings, and return to you. Luckily, I returned in time to save you from being killed. Your horse carried your scent and I followed it back to you. You told me to go after my goals and ambitions to find greater power, I did what you requested but the feeling of something comforting and important is missing, so I followed you back here. " He says.

 

He came back after realizing that Rin is finally happy and safe, he saved me that day because he loves me. He fulfilled all of my requests because he thought it would make me happy. I'm filled with happiness finally knowing his true feelings.

 

"You saved me because you love me, you wiped my tears because you didn't want to see me in pain. You listened to all of my requests because you thought it would make me happy? I wish you told me." I ask him.

 

"I did. As a demon, I have no need to feel such weak emotions. My pride prevented me from saying such thoughts and feelings, but in the end it consumed me. I wanted to say something that night when you told me that we should become strangers once again, but I kept my words silent because I thought it was what you wanted. I apologize if my coldness and quietness hurt you________." Sesshomaru says gently caressing my cheek.

 

I take his hand in mind and I shake my head.

 

"No, you don't need to apologize for anything Sesshomaru, it was all me. I was foolish, so foolish. I hurt myself because I was selfish. I loved you so much, and then I pushed you away from me because I loved you so much, all the pain that I felt till now was all because of myself. Thank you for coming back to me, thank you for not giving up on me when I tried to give up on my love for you." I say with tears in my eyes. 

 

"I suppose the pain was worth it in the end, because I get to hear your heartfelt confession after so long. Traveling far to watch over you is never a waste of time." Sesshomaru says wiping my tears. 

 

"How did you find me anyway? My scent would have vanished from the village within a few hours of me leaving." I ask him.

 

"The smell of Fragrant Olives fits you perfectly, such a shame that you're not wearing it anymore." Sesshomaru says with a small smile as his amber eyes looks into mine.

 

So that's why he gave that jade bottle to me, it wasn't just a gift from him. It was for him to follow it and come find me due to its lingering smell. 

 

"Sesshomaru..." I say overcome with emotions, my tears start to fall from my eyes again.

 

Sesshomaru shows me another smile again, he takes my face in his cool hands and he leans in. He kisses my tears away and then he  lifts my face up and his cool lips presses against mine gently. Sesshomaru kissed me, I would have never imagined the day that I would kiss someone, let alone a great demon like him. Although he is a demon, his kiss were gentle and I feel nothing different from it except the overwhelming feeling of love. I finally realize that although he's a demon and I'm a human, when it comes to love it doesn't matter if we don't stand on equal grounds or not. How could I forget, two of my best friends are married, one's a human like me and the other is part demon just like Sesshomaru. Kagome and Inuyasha are perfect examples of love having no barriers between races. Sesshomaru then gently releases my lips from his and looks at me.

 

"Why am I so special from everyone else Sesshomaru? What do you see in me that you haven't seen in anyone else?" I ask him curiously.

 

"I suppose your inner strength to keep your deepest feelings locked away for the sake of other's happiness. Also because you kept pushing me away without giving any proper explanations, except saying it's for my happiness accompanied by a smile. It's time to think about your own happiness now on_________." Sesshomaru says touching my face. 

 

"Will you stay with me and help me accomplish that goal then?" I ask him. 

 

"I will, and that is my goal from now on. I don't need to find more power, because I have everything I need." Sesshomaru says leaning his forehead against mine gently. 

 

I then lean my head against his chest, and he held me tightly against him. 

 

"If I have known you years prior, I don't think a moment like this would ever exist. Or let alone have you speak a word to me. I'm thankful that Rin became a part of your life and taught you compassion. Loving you and hoping to have you love me back was my wish, my dream, and now it finally became reality. It still feels like a dream." I say quietly against his chest.

 

"Rin taught me compassion and showed me a glimpse of love, but you___________, you taught me what love really is about. Putting one's happiness on hold for their sake, to long for someone when they're not in your life again, and share such moment together." He says quietly with love in his voice. 

 

"I love you Sesshomaru, I want to stay like this with you for a bit more." I tell him quietly.

 

"If you still think it's a dream, then dream a bit more. I'll be here." He replies back to me. 

 

I smile against his chest and wrap my arms around his lean but strong torso. The bundle of soft fur on his shoulder gently brushing against my arm. Sesshomaru hold me tightly against him, I close my eyes finally feeling at peace. Soon I fall asleep in his arms, with him sitting on the soft grass and me in his lap. The flowers gently swaying in the spring wind in the middle of the quiet night.