“Did he throw you out?” Wonho said while chewing a mouthful of ramen. 

“Nope.” Jooheon said while stirring his ramen, he had taken two bites of it but he didn’t feel that hungry. When he left the apartment he first called Wonho, remembering the latter said something about his parents being out of town for a week, hoping he could crash there. Jooheon knew Wonho would and annoy the out if him, but he preferred that above being questioned and lectured by Kihyun. Both his friends weren’t stupid, they would know something happened between Minhyuk and him, and Jooheon knew the affection Kihyun had for Minhyuk. So if Wonho hadn’t accepted his request than Jooheon probably had just slept in a hotel.

But he didn’t want to be alone.

Alone with the shivers running through his body.

Alone with his mind.

So there Jooheon was, on a very late Monday evening in Wonho’s apartment, thinking he would be able to handle Wonho.

But something was off.

It was the first question Wonho popped about Minhyuk, while Jooheon was already at his place for more than an hour. That was not like Wonho because Jooheon expected to be able to let out his frustration by nagging and cursing at Wonho, but somehow Wonho was not in the mood to provoke the other. On the other hand it didn’t look like Wonho was down or feeling sick.

Was Wonho just worried about Jooheon? The thought made Jooheon internally smirk. It would be a miracle if that was the truth.

Jooheon felt like shaking Wonho up when the latter just nodded at Jooheon’s answer. Is he drugged? Since when does Wonho take a no for an answer. Jooheon got so worried he almost forgot about his own problem.

“What’s up with you?” Jooheon asked, laying his chopsticks next to his ramen because he decided he wouldn’t finish his food.

Wonho sighed, letting a silence fall before he answered Jooheon’s question.

“Not much, I guess.”

“What’s not much?” Jooheon frowned, convinced his friend was bothered by something. Which made him curious because Wonho never got bothered by something.

“I think I got rejected.” Wonho said with a serious face, Jooheon couldn’t deduce what the other was feeling but the answer made him chuckle.

“Wonho, not everyone will just jump on you, okay? Face it, not everyone likes a buffed bunny.” Jooheon laughed a little but noticed the former didn’t react to all of it and just stared at his empty bowl, deep in thoughts.

Jooheon felt kind of dazed by Wonho’s mood, not knowing how to make the other feel better. But Jooheon didn’t need to think twice to know who Wonho was talking about.

“Listen Wonho, he didn’t fit you anyway.” Jooheon paused as Wonho lifted his head and their eyes met. “Changkyun is not the type you can keep by just kissing him, like I don’t know him but it’s obvious as hell. ”

“How would you know?” Wonho shoot back and Jooheon could feel the defensive mood of the other.

“That he is not your type? Oh, Wonho come on!” Jooheon clicked his tongue. “In comparison to him you’re a bloody devil. He’s the type of guy searching for a fluffy partner while you are just down to .”

Jooheon felt annoyed, he still didn’t get why Wonho was chasing after Minhyuk’s little brother. Even if Wonho liked the other, which would be non-existing considering Jooheon, Kihyun and even Wonho himself were convinced Wonho was not capable of love, Jooheon would hate it. Purely because he disliked Changkyun.

As a matter of fact, Jooheon hated the whole Im family.

So Jooheon would convince Wonho to keep his hands of Changkyun, and somehow Changkyun should be thankful for that because wasn’t it destined for him to get hurt and crushed by Wonho?

But then Wonho said something that made Jooheon flinch deep down, shocked and stunned by Wonho’s weird mood.

“What if I do want a relationship with him, Jooheon?”

It took some time for Jooheon to produce an answer in his brain, which felt like it was really knocked out by now.

“You should hear yourself speaking. And it wouldn’t matter, you will just pull a dickmove on him, Wonhoe.”

Wonho tsked and smirked.

“And what dickmove did you put on Minhyuk?”

Jooheon’s mouth went shut in a split second and Wonho smirked victoriously knowing he hit a nerve.

“It’s late and we got school tomorrow, I’ll show you the guestroom.”

Wonho stood up and Jooheon followed him, Wonho gave him a shirt he could use as a pajama if he wanted to and told him goodnight.

Jooheon directly let himself fall on the bed.

Too tired to shower,

or brush his teeth,

or to even give a .

Or that’s what he wanted to believe; him not giving a . But Jooheon couldn’t fool himself anymore,

there was something he felt when Minhyuk kissed him.

But it wasn’t love, that was not what Jooheon felt for Minhyuk. It was just lust.

Because, yes, maybe Jooheon didn’t like sleeping alone in a big bed.

And, yes, maybe Jooheon did like spooning Minhyuk and feeling some warmth.

But, no, Jooheon did not feel wanted or loved by Minhyuk. And that was fine.

He wanted that to be fine, but reality was that Jooheon didn’t feel fine.

Why the did Minhyuk think he had the privilege of kissing Jooheon?!

How the does someone who is so scared of Jooheon all the time kiss him so shamelessly?!

Jooheon didn’t want to live with Minhyuk, he didn’t want to love Minhyuk. There was nothing to live for, nothing love worthy. It would be just an empty life.

An empty life with electric shivers running through Jooheon’s body, fresh warm meals on Monday and Tuesday, and accumulations that later turn out into explosions of longingness and lust.

Jooheon stared at the ceiling until he made up his mind.

There was no choice but to live the empty life with Minhyuk.

Tears started to fall out of Jooheon’s eyes and it was a while ago that Jooheon allowed himself to cry like that. But this time it was for a good reason; because Jooheon felt like he was throwing away his freedom.

…

Jooheon looked like the day after but Wonho forced him to go to school, teasing him that it would be his walk of shame. For the rest of the day he didn’t say much and tried to ignore the death glares Kihyun was giving him, Wonho tried to make a remark about it, saying Kihyun shouldn’t act like that considering the state Jooheon was in.

“Well, I’m happy for once he is the one looking like .” And so Kihyun shut Wonho in no time and the latter got back to eye-searching for Changkyun.

Eventually Kihyun grabbed Wonho’s face with one hand and directed it towards him.

“You should also look like . You both deserve to get kicked in the balls!” With that Kihyun stood up and walked away, exiting the cafeteria.  

Both men looked at each other and deeply sighed.

…

After school Wonho and Jooheon stopped by a convenience store to get some liquor and food. Kihyun had ignored them for the rest of the schoolday and somehow it made both feel slightly bad.

Jooheon slammed his empty can of beer on Wonho’s kitchen table.

“It’s not our fault Kihyun became fond of the whole Im family!”

Wonho made an ‘ahh’ sound after drinking and nodded. “Yes we are victims too!!”

Jooheon heavily nodded, if he was sober he would’ve felt like his head could snap any second but right now he was numb for any pain or irritations to his body.

“Exactly! What the fack are those Im people thinking?!”

They kept on talking like that for a while until both nearly passed out from all the drinking. Luckily, Wonho was somehow able to drag Jooheon with him to his bedroom where they both fell asleep.

The advantage of passing out at 20:00 was that Wonho woke up quite early, with a huge headache of course. But he still had a couple of hours before he and Jooheon had to go to school. Wonho got up and took a shower, after that he got rid of all the beer cans and leftover food in his kitchen. Then he woke up Jooheon, saying he should take a shower too and Wonho made some hangover-food and took some pills against his headache, laying two pills on the table for Jooheon.

Jooheon admitted the shower already helped a lot and he even felt hungry after it, he was glad to see Wonho had some knowledge about the perfect cure against hangovers and started digging in. They took their time eating, considering they still had an hour left before they would leave for school.

Jooheon got nervous because Wonho’s eyes kept finding his and the latter would open his mouth, seeming to want to ask something, but closed it quickly and broke his gaze with Jooheon. It drove Jooheon crazy and when he was about to snap at Wonho the latter finally made his move.

“So you kissed him?” Wonho asked carefully, feeling how his body was prepared to flee, just in case if hangover-Jooheon would decide to kill him.

“No, he kissed me.” Jooheon said annoyed, he had no energy or motivation anymore to dodge the subject.

Wonho mouthed an ‘o’ and thought for a little while before hitting Jooheon with another guestion.

“Did you like it?”

A silence dropped and Jooheon felt anger building up inside of him and he looked furiously at Wonho.

“Fack you Wonho and stop smiling!” Jooheon sighed deeply and rolled his eyes. “Can you be facking serious for one time?”

“Sure. Can you be honest with yourself for one time?”

Jooheon clenched his teeth. “You’re facking useless.”

Wonho chuckled. “I was just asking, I never saw you so red explaining just a little kissy.”

Wonho was just in time to avoid the fork coming his way, of course he just laughed in Jooheon’s face, which filled his anger even more.

“Oh, I’m sorry Wonho, but not everyone is acting like a pair of teenagers!”

“Whatever Jooheon. I don’t think you’ll get out of this.” Wonho smile became less big and his face became more serious while looking into Jooheon’s eyes. “I’m so sorry but come on Jooheon. You tried so hard to push him away with your moves, but in the end he just became the same as you...”

“ed up and attracted to you.”

Minhyuk blankly stared at the ceiling, bright light from the television shining on the side of his face. Now and then there were tears falling down his face and Minhyuk still had difficulties breathing.

There were no thoughts,

just nothing.

It still seemed minutes ago since Jooheon slammed the door and ran out the apartment, but in reality it had already been a couple of hours. Minhyuk didn’t bother to check the time because nothing seemed to pass.

Nothing seemed to matter anymore.

A little sigh came out of Minhyuk’s mouth but he didn’t move. There was no energy left in his whole body, as if kissing Jooheon just the life out of him.

Why did he do that?

Minhyuk knew the answer, he wanted to feel something after all this time. A nervous laugh escaped through Minhyuk’s lips.

“Isn’t this what you wanted Jooheon? Isn’t this your own fault?”

But his words were just a mere whisper and even if Minhyuk’s spoke louder, there would be no one listening.

There was no one there for him.

Minhyuk fell asleep after a while, waking up around afternoon but he still didn’t move.

He just laid on the couch like he became one with it, but eventually the news on the TV indicated that it was 14:00 and Minhyuk sighed. He couldn’t just stay on this couch for the rest of his life.

So he got up,

feeling pain everywhere.

Minhyuk assumed he was mentally so broken that even his body started suffering from it. He dialed a phone number, which put him in a waiting line. Minhyuk scoffed, staring outside the window while leaning against the kitchen table.

Eventually a kind female voice answered.

“Minhyuk here, Im Minhyuk. I’ll be coming at 16:00 for him. Thank you.” And he ended the call, not waiting for an answer from the kind voice.

He took a shower, brushed his teeth and drank some water. Because after all that happened Minhyuk still didn’t feel hungry.

Minhyuk called a cab and gave him the address. While sitting in the car he kept staring out the window.

He touched his lips, but he quickly blinked away the tears that threatened to fall of his face.

Minhyuk felt anger boiling inside of him. What the was he thinking?!

Minhyuk may have felt empty, but he was still thinking sober. He knew kissing Jooheon wouldn’t make the latter be more kind to Minhyuk. Minhyuk never expected that.

He just expected to feel less empty.

But when he spend a whole night alone on the couch it was just that;

emptiness.

“Sir Im!” Minhyuk looked up, meeting the eyes of the cab driver. “We’re here.”

“I-I see, thank you!” Minhyuk quickly paid the driver and apologized for spacing out. The driver just gave him a warm smile and said to take care before riding off.

Minhyuk walked towards the building and sighed deeply before entering. “Im represent!” He cynically said.

He didn’t bother going to the secretary to say he was here, but went straight to the elevator and pressed the button with the number 8 on.

Minhyuk knocked on the door, he first wanted to storm in but he knew that would be trouble if the person was talking to someone or doing some business.

“Minhyuk, come in.”

Minhyuk opened the door and walked in, sitting down on the chair in front of the desk.

“Hello father.”

“Jimin said she got a strange phone call from you. Can you please just call me next time or at least act less rude by waiting for an answer and ending the call decently?”

“Sure. I’m sorry, I was bothered.”

Mr. Im raised an eyebrow. “By what?” He asked curiously.

“It’s not that hard to guess if you think about it.” Minhyuk said sarcastically, which made his father almost roll his eyes and Minhyuk could feel the older man getting annoyed.

“You must be in quite a mood to act like this Minhyuk. But fine, I’ll listen for once. Tell me what did he do?” His father leaned back in his chair and looked expectantly at Minhyuk.

“Jooheon terrorizes me every facking day,” his father glanced warningly at Minhyuk for cursing but Minhyuk didn’t care about that at the moment, “we both are not doing well living together and there is nothing. After all these months we are still strangers. I still got the feeling I live alone and-”

“That’s because both of you don’t try hard enough!” His father slammed his fist on his desk, making Minhyuk shiver, and Minhyuk heard the heavy breathing of the old man. “I thought that by now you and Jooheon would have at least a little bit more of a connection with each other.”

“Father, we just don’t match. Seriously chances are high that if it was someone else that-”

“But there is no one else Minhyuk! And you’ll have to deal with it.”

A tensed silence fell.

“I don’t want to marry him. I’ll do anything, but not that.”

Mr. Im gave Minhyuk a death glare and sighed deeply. “I think you both lack motivation to make it work.” He tapped his finger on the desk and looked like he was thinking hard.

“You don’t want to marry? Then better quit that job of yours and start studying management in college. You don’t want that either? Well then you won’t see your brothers anymore and you will not be welcome at home.”

All the courage and fight in Minhyuk disappeared with his father’s words. Minhyuk regretted coming here like it would change anything. Like his father would know what Minhyuk was going through.

Minhyuk got up and left the office. He took a cab home and again the driver had to snap him out of his thoughts before Minhyuk realized he was home.

When he walked into the apartment he noticed no changes so Jooheon was still gone.

Good.

Again, Minhyuk was pulled to the couch were he laid down and stared at the ceiling.

A shaky chuckle left his mouth. Guess the tears are back in stock. Minhyuk thought while the first dropped off his cheek.

…

Minhyuk was happy it was Wednesday, today he had to be earlier at the restaurant for discussing the new menu with boss Min and the other chef that worked there. The past days had been quite a hell for Minhyuk, an empty space of regret and hate, not only towards Jooheon but also towards himself and just life in general.

Minhyuk was happy he would finally have some distraction; something good to focus on. He actually slept a lot the past night, which made him look better on the outside compared to how he felt like on the inside.

He dressed well and went to the restaurant. Boss Min and the other chef even gave him compliments that he looked good. It made Minhyuk laugh cynically on the inside.

The whole afternoon was restful for Minhyuk, boss Min cracked some jokes and Minhyuk got a lot of inspiration for the new menu, feeling better by every praise he got from his colleagues.

“Minhyuk, we will also have a new waiter here. Her name is Yeri, she will be here in a little while, could you show her around?”

“Sure boss Min!”

 A little later Yeri arrived, she was a short but pretty girl with a big smile. She listened well to all the information Minhyuk gave her and after spending five minutes with her Minhyuk knew Yeri was a soft ball of sunshine.

After the last costumers were gone Yeri stayed eating some food and drinking with the others. She was quite the social butterfly and wasn’t shy talking to people she never met before. Minhyuk and the others were amused by her stories about her careless youth and Yeri spoke about how she lived alone because her family lived in Jeju island, but she wanted to study in Seoul.

When everyone left Minhyuk noticed Yeri walking home.

“You walk home alone at this time of the night?”

Yeri turned around and smiled. “No worries Minhyuk, I don’t live far!” She grabbed something from her bag and showed it to Minhyuk. “Besides I got pepper spray.”

Minhyuk tsked and smiled, not believing how Yeri had no sign of being scared walking home alone.

“Get in the car, I’ll drive you.”

 Yeri didn’t think twice and accepted Minhyuk’s offer. She indeed didn’t live far as Minhyuk only had to drive five minutes, but in that short amount of time Yeri talked a lot. Minhyuk heard about how her family struggled with money and even though her mom acted like that was not the case, her little sister told her the truth on the phone about how their dad got jobless because of savings at his work. Yeri expressed how mad and heartbroken she was when she heard it, so she decided to make it a bit easier for her parents by starting to work herself.

Minhyuk loved how brave Yeri was despite all her struggles and loneliness (which she admitted she was a lot). Minhyuk wished he had the same positive mind as Yeri.

They arrived at her apartment and Minhyuk knew the area damn well, it was the same place he had an apartment, so he had already a good idea of how Yeri’s apartment looked like and couldn’t help it but feel sad for the girl.

But Yeri seemed anything but sad, as she stepped out of the car and waved Minhyuk goodbye, thanking him for the ride and promising she will treat Minhyuk a drink for driving her home. Minhyuk smiled widely and was happy that after all these days he could feel happiness.

Minhyuk was glad his workweek started again and he looked forward to seeing Yeri again and talking to her.

The apartment was still empty and when Minhyuk nervously said “hello?” he was relieved when no one answered.

On the other hand, he also felt disappointed. It meant he would still be alone for the rest of the night, maybe the rest of the week. And Minhyuk didn’t want to feel alone.

It was still hard to think about what happened a few nights before, and Minhyuk still felt Jooheon’s lips on his even though it was just a soft and innocent kiss. Minhyuk didn’t know what he was waiting for; a Jooheon who would try and make something out of their arranged marriage, or a Jooheon who will break it off.

Both options sounded okay to Minhyuk. Anything better than what it was now.

Minhyuk took a shower, he didn’t feel like sleeping yet so he watched a DVD. He texted Changkyun wondering if he wanted to meet later this week considering he couldn’t get coffee today, but he got no response but Minhyuk assumed his little brother was already asleep.

What if Jooheon never comes back?

The thought made Minyuk flinch, not knowing where it came from. The thought somehow hit him hard and he grabbed his cellphone but then realized he didn’t have Jooheon’s phone number.

But Minhyuk already figured out Jooheon could read minds because the former got startled when he suddenly heard the noise of a key being turned in the lock.

His heart got in overdrive and his eyes became focused on the door.

Minhyuk was so not ready for this .

Don't ask me what this is lol, I just needed something to fill in what Jooheon did when being away from the apartment and Yeri's here *whoop whoop* 

I know, this chap is probably quite boring considering what happened previous chapter and maybe their feelings aren't described that good but point is: I wanted to keep the emotional stuff for next chapter. So please look forward to it! 

HAVE A LOVELY WEEKEND ♥ ♥