Part 1 - Chapter 2

I Wanna Love
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2

Shinhwa was heaving, a hundred bodies on the dance floor of this level alone. Upstairs in the other two rooms would be even more people but Niel liked the bar and the 80's fusion music of the lower floor. He watched Byunghun and Chanhee grow progressively drunker and closer.

Something had happened between his best friends lately, they were distant and cold whenever he was around. The two of them had avoided his straight on question that night but he couldn't help but feel perhaps he was the reason they seemed to be drifting. Niel refused to let himself remember the real reason they were out, focusing on his friends’ problems rather than his own.

The two joined him at the bar, laughing and holding hands.

"I want a cigarette!" Chanhee whined loudly.

"No!" Byunghun laughed.

"Please!?" Chanhee clasped his hands together in a begging motion.

"No!" Byunghun and Niel chorused.

"They're bad for you!" Niel yelled over the noise.

"And they make you stink." Byunghun added.

"I want a cigarette!"

"Let's dance instead!" Niel suggested, motioning for all three to take their shot.

With the alcohol down they sidled through the crowd and into the crush. Chanhee immediately took Byunghun's waist into his hands and pressed their bodies together. Niel smiled, turning to dance by himself. A guy approached him, a bit of a sleazy look in his eyes but Niel simply smiled and shook his head. "I'm straight." He mouthed politely before sliding backwards to be closer to Byunghun and Chanhee. The approaching man shrugged and moved away.

Suddenly, a memory pulsed into Niel's mind:

Niel felt he had lost his mind long ago. He was now just sensations and music. Rhythm and touch. Without his mind to tell him otherwise he turned and began to passionately kiss the man whose name he didn't even know.

A physical shudder resounded through Niel. He cringed at the memory. At the memory or the mixture of pleasure and shame? He fought his way out of the dance floor and rushed to the bar. He would drink until he forgot how to feel.

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Changhyun was more than a little drunk. Honestly, he was wrecked. He had lost track of Lola and the group from the cafe a while ago, content to just dance and drink on his own.

A tall, Caucasian had his hands all over his body and Changhyun let him. It felt amazing to be actually touched for once, desired and appreciated. They had been grinding against one another for a while now; the statuesque guy took Changhyun's hand and began to pull him away from the dancefloor, pausing to kiss him messily.

For a moment Changhyun hesitated. The man tugged him forward a little impatiently, he stumbled a little. Suddenly, with the loss of balance Changhyun's stomach rolled.

Uh oh.

Changhyun pulled back, he needed the bathroom. His companion turned, a frustrated scowl on his face.

“Don't be a ing tease!” He shouted, misunderstanding Changhyun's reluctance.

All Changhyun could do was shake his head in apology and flee.

Moments later he was bent double over a toilet bowl, watching almost 100 dollars of alcohol leave his system.

“.” He groaned at the loss of both his statuesque companion and the alcohol.

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Byunghun pressed himself closer to Chanhee, burying his face in his boyfriend’s neck. For the first time in weeks he felt light and free. He knew it was the alcohol but he didn't care. He was just happy that for a few hours he felt normal again.

They moved in time with the rhythm, lost in their own world like they used to be all the time. Every time dark thoughts tried to close in Byunghun would press himself against Chanhee and ignore anything but the feel of their bodies pressed together.

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Jonghyun leant against the sink preening his hair into place

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Comments

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JooHunnit
#1
Chapter 27: This...this was one of the best things i have ever read
Really amazing writing, superb plot- placement and everything was perfect. I loved every character and....it was really spectacular.
IHaveRuinedMyLife
#2
Chapter 27: WOW! Just wow! It's been so long since I read a great, chaptered Teen Top fic, that I almost forgot that this is what I'm living for ㅋㅋ it's just that people don't seem to write them anymore... which is too sad ㅠㅠ
But it also means that I'm incredibly thankful you wrote this story!! I loved it so so so so much!! I'd even go so far, saying it is the best Teen Top fic I've read in... probably two years. I loved your way of describing the characters and the dynamics of each couple. ChangRick was SO ADORABLE in here~~ and ChunJoe were so bittersweet at first and perfect towards the end ♡ as for N.A.P.... it actually drove me crazy ㅋㅋ the moment Minsoo stood Niel up I was literally screaming at my phone ㅋㅋ but it also turned out to be so cute and fluffy and just the right amount of sap xD
so yeah... thumbs up for this!!! thank you so much for sharing~~ (and please continue writing Teen Top fics!! I sometimes feel like I'm the only person with an ongoing Teen Top fic that nobody even reads... it's sad... we need more Teen Top again~~)
chunjixbyungie
#3
Chapter 27: Do i have one ? Rofl . Byunghun can be hilarious sometimes ! I really liked the staring part and the whole what are you staring at.. Why ..because i like them .
Byunghun blushing and playing with the carpet too . very natural ~ he actually confessed first ! How surprising ! It was funny when chanhee said bec you are my best friend lol i bet Byunghun felt his stomach drop . That aside though , I get why he got angry the first time . i mean .. I may too with chanhee laughing in such situation . but the second time i was like .. does he have split personality ?
What angered him in " you better get used to it "?
The part where chanhee thought the doubts would come back but he'd be there to chase them off was so sweet and perfect as a closure ! Really liked it .
And of course we can't forget niel's part . so enjoyable and so funny * thumbs up *
chunjixbyungie
#4
Chapter 26: your brain is fantastically bad at sticking to one project and mine is that way with procrastination , which explains why I just got to read this NOW . I have no word to describe how fluffy and adorable ( Chanhee calling Byung a marshmallow is seriously the best thing ever ) this was ( realistic too ) Byunghun's thoughts about niel having everything he himself lacks and still being scared , unsure of himself .
it's ironic how someone may seem to lead a happy life when they are in fact being bullied .
I'll see you in about four months when i stop being lazy and finally read the next ch .
Dotoriji
#5
Chapter 27: My hearttttt is melting!!! This confession honestly explains so much more why Byunghun was the way that he was throughout the story... his doubts and insecurities. I love how Byunghun was the first to confess and say “I love you” but chanhee was the one to reassure him and really be there to chase Byunghun’s doubts away. Ahhh they’re just perfect for each other <3
Dotoriji
#6
Chapter 26: This is so sweet!!! Ahhhh I love this friendship T^T
Papoufruits
#7
Chapter 25: It felt a little sad that it's completed, though I'm really GLAD it is in a way too, haha. Unfinished fanfics are the worst sometimes... anyway, I love the theme of this story and how you wanted to include everyone's point of view. It kept the interest going.

As a suggestion, I'd love to read more about Byunghun and Chanhee's story when they were younger and how their relationship developed (maybe that's what you meant with "Byunghun's confession story"?). Thank you for this lovely story and can't wait to read more from you! <3
chunjixbyungie
#8
Chapter 25: Waah... Such a sweet ,satisfying ending ~
I enjoyed every moment of it !
Happiness was practically radiating from everyone . Minsoo's thoughts were so heartwarming along with Niel's of course whereas Jonghyun and Changhyun were so cute ~
Byunghun and chanhee ... Well the part when bh thought 11 years hadn't changed anything and not an even eternity will . * squeals *
It's awesome how you managed in just 25 chapters to write a story that's not rushed and not slow-paced either . It was perfect .
Thank you for sharing it with us !
<3
Dotoriji
#9
Chapter 25: I am so emotional omg I can't believe it's finished ㅜㅜ
The ending is perfect they're all together and happy...
I don't even know where to begin how to describe how much I enjoyed reading this story and just looking forward to the updates every week ahh I'm going to miss it
Thank you for making the ending so wonderful ㅜㅜ
Chanhee & byunghuns long strong relationship... it's like I can feel the love through the screen;; it's just so precious;; I definitely would love to read about byunghun's confession! (oh and if you're taking requests maybe about their first time?? askfkskdk)
Okay and Changhyun and Jonghyun can they be anymore cute?!? Throughout the whole story they were just so into each other and ugh the best. Now they both have rings to propose to each other! I wonder how that'll turn out lol
Niel being so happy for his best friends and minsu being happy for his new younger brothers made me so emotional ㅜㅜ those two are the perfect match and just so attached to each other seeing them so in love is so heartwarming like they finally found the one they've been looking for their whole lives~

Thank you again for writing this wonderful story!
I enjoyed it so much and I'll definitely be coming back to re-read it~!! <3
lazyfaceu #10
Chapter 25: i'm crying oh my god i screamed when i saw the "completed" status on this book