Junhoe was just drifting off when the sound of his phone woke him up, the message notification going off. He must have forgotten to mute it for the night. He grabbed for it on his bedside table, groping in the darkness. He looked at the screen with bleary eyes, searching for the culprit. If it was Hanbin, he was going to send him a picture of his middle finger before going back to sleep.

But it was Jinhwan. He rubbed his eyes before opening the messenger. 

-wut r u up to?- 

-was tryin to sleep- 

-oh so sorry- 

-no ur not- 

-ur right since ur awake entertain me!- 

-how?- 

-kinda . send me a pic- 

Junhoe almost dropped his phone when he read Jinhwan’s request. Was he being serious? 

-wtf no- 

- on pls do it for me- 

-im not doing it- 

-video chat me?- 

Junhoe didn’t answer right away, instead he looked at his door, silhouetted by the light in the hall, closed but unlocked. He should just tell Jinhwan he was going to sleep, it was pretty late after all. But they hadn’t seen each other since the weekend, and it was already Thursday. 

He got up and went to his bedroom door, pushing in the button to lock it. 

-k just a few mins tho its late- 

He barely had time to rearrange himself on his bed before Jinhwan was calling him, and he took a second to fluff up his pillow before he answered it. 

“Took you long enough to answer,” Jinhwan greeted, pouting at him on the screen. 

Junhoe grinned back. “Had to lock my door.” He should have checked to see where his parents were before taking the call. Were they in their room yet? It was thankfully at the other end of the apartment, but Junhoe still felt wary of speaking too loudly. 

“Oh yeah? What do you plan on doing if you felt the need to lock the door?” Jinhwan . 

“Nothing.” Junhoe answered a little too quickly, feeling stupidly defensive for some reason. Maybe it was just because of the unexpectedness of the situation, and the fact that he’d been half asleep when Jinhwan had texted him. 

“Right, sure,” Jinhwan replied, “I didn’t lock my door. Do you think I should?” Jinhwan fixed him with a strong stare, like he was daring him to do something. 

What the dare was, Junhoe wasn’t sure. 

“I don’t know, do what you want, hyung.” It was kind of weird, video chatting. They didn’t always look directly at each other when they were physically together, but it felt weird video chatting with Jinhwan and not looking at him continually. But the longer he looked, the tenser the atmosphere. 

“Why don’t you give me a reason to lock my door?” Jinhwan challenged. 

“Like what?” Junhoe knew what he wanted, but were they really about to do that? 

Jinhwan grinned at him and changed his phone to his other hand. “I know you said you didn’t want to send me a picture, but you can show me now, can’t you?” He wasn’t sure why, but he’d been feeling riled up all day, a plethora of energy that wasn’t even expended during training. 

Junhoe couldn’t help but feel embarrassed at the request. “Really?” 

“Yes really,” Jinhwan replied, a slight whine to his voice, “I’ve been all day for some reason, I need help.” 

Junhoe rolled his eyes. “You can’t just watch or something?” 

“I don’t want ,” Jinhwan replied, winking at him, “I want you. But it’s too late for us to meet up so this is the next best thing, right?” 

Junhoe just shook his head, half at Jinhwan’s request, and half at himself for actually following through. “Fine, just because you asked nicely.” 

Without thinking about it too much Junhoe reached down and brushed his hand over himself. Of course he was already half-hard just thinking about it, and Jinhwan begging him wasn’t helping either. Before he could talk himself out of it he reached into his pants and pulled his out, angling his phone down to show Jinhwan live footage of himself holding it. 

There was something a little lewd about doing this over the phone and Jinhwan was beyond grateful that Junhoe was actually indulging him. He was pleased to see evidence that Junhoe was enjoying it too. “Have I ever told you that you actually have a really good ?” 

Junhoe raised panicky eyes to his door as he turned the volume on his phone down. It probably wasn’t as loud as it was sounding to him, but he still waited for a moment, listening for footsteps in the hall. But none came. 

“Uh, yeah, I think you have, once or twice,” he replied nervously, taking a deep breath to try and get his heart calmed down. 

Jinhwan actually laughed at him, probably telling from the shakiness of the phone and his loud breathing that he’d gotten to him. “Do you always respond to compliments so half-heartedly?” 

Junhoe wondered if Jinhwan thought he was being rude. Had it been rude? He’d just been rattled by the unexpectedness of it. “Sorry, hyung, you just, ah, caught me off guard.” 

Jinhwan grinned, but felt weird listening to Junhoe apologize while he was still looking at his . It wasn’t really helping the mood. “Hey, put it back on your face for a minute.” Junhoe did as requested, and Jinhwan looked at him with a soft smile. “Calm down, okay? I just wanted to have a fun little video chat with you, but if you’re gonna be freaking out, maybe this isn’t a good idea.” Jinhwan had known him long enough by now (and he’d listened to Hanbin enough) to know that if he wanted Junhoe to do something, the best way to achieve it was to insinuate that he couldn’t do it. 

It worked like a charm. “No, I’m fine!” Junhoe replied, almost offended. He could handle a stupid video chat. How lame did Jinhwan think he was? “I was half asleep when you called, just took me a few minutes to fully wake up. I’m good though, whatever you want.” What exactly did Jinhwan want with this video chat? He said he’d been all day. Did he want them to together or something? 

“Whatever I want?” Jinhwan asked, eyes narrowed and his tone as sulty as he could make it. It made Junhoe blush slightly, and Jinhwan had to keep from grinning. 

“Sure, whatever,” Junhoe replied, grabbing his again, “you wanna watch me rub one out or something? Is that why you called?” 

Bingo. “Yeah, actually I was hoping we could do that together. I watch you, and you watch me. I think we’ll both sleep better, right?” 

Junhoe nodded. “Okay, let’s do it?” Jinhwan winked at him and Junhoe switched his phone to his , because he didn’t want Jinhwan to see him blushing. Seconds later and Junhoe’s phone was showing Jinhwan’s , his fingers wrapped around it, a slow up and down motion already happening. Junhoe bit his lip watching it. It was hot, no doubt, but it felt kind of dirty, too. 

Jinhwan had no issue with it feeling dirty—in fact he liked it more for that point. Seeing Junhoe on his phone screen was exactly what he needed, and he made sure to moan loud enough for Junhoe to hear him. He could picture Junhoe’s blushing face in his mind. An angry blush, of course, because as soon as Junhoe realized he was blushing he’d be mad about it, embarrassed that someone had made his body react in a way that he couldn’t control. 

Junhoe did blush when he heard Jinhwan, but it also hit him harder than it would have had they been together. In the absence of certain senses, others made more of an impact. He clenched his fist tighter around himself, cursing himself for not keeping lube near his bed. If he didn’t stop to get some, he’d be tender in the morning. Should he stop? 

But it didn’t look like Jinhwan was using any. Besides, he couldn’t remember which drawer he’d stashed it in, and he didn’t want to break the moment. 

Jinhwan shifted his position a bit, draping himself off the side of his bed just enough so his head could hang down, because he sometimes liked the feeling of blood rushing to it. It made him feel even more lightheaded, enhanced the whole thing, made him feel like he was flying. He watched Junhoe’s hand on the screen, thought about how much bigger it was than his own, thought about it wrapped around himself and how good it had felt. 

Thought about how good it would feel inside of him. Thought about all of Junhoe inside of him. It’s not that he was getting impatient, or anything, but Jinhwan missed having . with Junhoe would be different, of course, and maybe it might even be a little better. But he didn’t know how long it would be until Junhoe was ready for it. But still… It couldn’t hurt to throw the thought out there, could it? 

“Junhoe-ya,” Jinhwan sat up at bit, just to be closer to his phone so Junhoe could hear him, “I can’t wait until we finally , I want all of you inside me.” He could hear Junhoe’s gasp of shock, and Jinhwan grinned at it, pleased at the response, “let’s do that soon, okay? I you, and you me.” Junhoe made a strangled noise of what seemed like assent, the shakiness of his video telling Jinhwan that the idea was clearly having a profound effect on Junhoe. It was enough to finish Jinhwan off, his whole body going tense as he shot his load onto his stomach. 

He hoped he’d managed to keep his phone pointed at it through it all. He flopped back onto the bed, eyes barely open, but apparently he’d been fine, because there on the screen was Junhoe, on his own stomach with his own strangled cry of pleasure. 

It was exactly what he’d wanted, exactly what he’d hoped for. He switched back to his face, showing Junhoe a sleepy smile, his half closed eyes warm with affection. 

“Thanks Junhoe-ya, that was exactly what I needed.” 

Junhoe nodded, but he’d forgotten to switch his own cam back to his face, because his brain was stuck on what Jinhwan had said during the moment, about them actually ing each other. Well, really he was stuck on the “I want all of you inside me” comment, and now his brain was shorting out from the pleasure, not even able to respond with words. 

Jinhwan was just smiling at him though, he probably understood what he was feeling. Junhoe smiled back (not that Jinhwan could see it) and wanted to say something more, wanted to say something at all, but he couldn’t make his brain work. 

Instead he just watched as Jinhwan blew him a kiss over the phone and said goodnight. Then the screen went black, and Junhoe dropped his phone onto his bed. 

He couldn’t believe he’d just jerked off on video for Jinhwan. How the hell had Jinhwan managed to talk him into it? Now that it was over he couldn’t believe he’d done it. It was something he never would have expected himself to do, and Jinhwan had somehow gotten him to do it. Not that it had been bad, of course. It had been pretty hot. He’d enjoyed it. 

And of course, the whole “I want all of you inside me” comment. He wouldn’t have heard that if they hadn’t done it. 

Was he ready for that? Was anyone ever truly ready for it? He wanted to. Wanted his first time to be with Jinhwan. That much he was certain of. Everyone always said it was supposed to be special, but he liked Jinhwan, and that would make it special enough, wouldn’t it? It was all just experience, anyway. Jinhwan had taught him loads so far, he clearly knew what he was doing. Junhoe thought the experience was important. 

He picked his phone back up and started composing a text to Jinhwan on a whim, rushing the words before he talked himself out of it. 

-i htink we shoudl have im readu-

-*ready-

Okay so it wasn’t just the one word he’d ed up, was it? God, Jinhwan was probably laughing at him right now. That was why he wasn’t responding, wasn’t? Or had Jinhwan just fallen asleep right away? 

Junhoe thought about calling him, just to know. Just to fake a laugh about his multiple typos. Blame it on the post- brain-freeze. But he didn’t, he just laid there and waited for a response. Waited for Jinhwan to say something. 

But minutes went by with no reply, and Junhoe couldn’t possibly go to sleep right now. He was too embarrassed by his own stupid message. Sounded like some dumb kid who was jumping in excitement over being offered some reward. Like he couldn’t contain himself. 

Jinhwan had to be laughing at him. Junhoe felt so stupid, looking back at the message. Had too much time passed for him to excuse himself for the multiple typos? He should have done that right away. It was too awkward now, made it look like he was feeling insecure about it. 

So stupid. Why are you so stupid and rash and immature and impatient and— 

-u sure??? u really want to????-

Junhoe dropped his phone again in relief after reading Jinhwan’s response. He wasn’t laughing, at least. 

-sorry i was cleaning up uthere juneee answer me urnot just messing withme ru???-

-still here i mean it- Junhoe smiled and read over Jinhwan’s own excited response, feeling infinitely better now that he knew that Jinhwan simply hadn’t seen the message at first. 

-if u r not being serious im gonna kick ur ok ive been waiting for this moment-

-nah im serious i promise i dont know when we can do it but i want to do it-

-ill figure something out ok its gonna be super good i promise ok?? thanks for telling me im gonna sleep so good now :)-

-:) me too hyung goodnight-

Junhoe wouldn’t be able to wipe the smile off his face if he’d tried. He laid his phone down on his bedside table, relieved and elated that Jinhwan seemed so excited over it. Of course he’d be excited over , but Junhoe was sure that Jinhwan seemed extra excited, because it wasn’t just going to be . Jinhwan liked him enough to get excited over it. 

Because it was him. It was the pair of them, together, that’s what had Jinhwan excited. 

Junhoe knew he wasn’t supposed to be thinking of this as anything more than casual, but it just didn’t feel casual anymore, and he was sure that Jinhwan didn’t feel casual either. 

Maybe he’d bring it up the next time they were together. Or maybe he should just wait until after they had so he didn’t ruin things with his big mouth the way he usually did. 
 

As soon as he woke up the following morning the first thing Junhoe did was rummage through his dresser to find his hidden bottle of lube. He moved it to the drawer in his bedside table. 

He was halfway through breakfast when his mother told him about their weekend plans. “I’m going to ask your sister to come and stay over on Saturday night.” 

“What? Why?” Junhoe looked up from his rice, wondering if he’d heard her properly. 

“Your father and I got an invitation to spend the night at the Yuseong hot springs with some friends,” she explained, and Junhoe had to hold his chopsticks tight so he didn’t drop them, “and I don’t want you to be alone.” 

“Mom I’m fine, I can spend one night alone.” A night alone. Without his parents. He couldn’t get too excited, had to stay calm so she didn’t expect anything. 

“Ah, sweetie, I’d feel better if you weren’t by yourself.” 

“I’ll get Hanbin to stay over.” Hanbin would cover for him. He was sure of it. 

His mom seemed to consider that option. “I suppose that would be okay, then. Ask him and let me know, otherwise I’ll ask Yejin to come over with you.” 

“He’ll do it, don’t ask Yejin.” He was tempted to ask her why she trusted Hanbin more than she trusted him, but he didn’t want to risk the opportunity now that she’d agreed. 

“Alright, no need to get snippy, sweetheart,” his mom teasingly replied, “I’m sorry if you’re upset that I don’t want you staying by yourself, but you’re my baby, and I worry about you.” 

Junhoe could barely keep himself from rolling his eyes and giving her some rude reply. He couldn’t help his knee-jerk response, but if he wanted a night alone with Jinhwan, he’d have to steel himself. “So I can stay with Hanbin?” 

“Yes, I said it’s okay. We’ll probably leave in the afternoon, and we’ll be back around the same time on Sunday.” She walked over to his chair, leaning down to kiss his cheek. “I have to leave for work, so make sure you ask Hanbin, okay?” 

“Yeah sure,” Junhoe waved to her and waited until the door closed behind her before pulling out his phone, but it wasn’t Hanbin he texted first. 

-my parents r away sat night u wanna come over?- He nervously waited for a response, wondered if Jinhwan would understand what he was asking for. 

-seriously?? yeah im down-

-cool theyr going to a hot spring out of town so from sat afternoon til sun im by myself-

-u want me to stay over for the night?-

There it was. The ultimate question that would determine exactly what sort of invitation he was giving Jinhwan. 

-yeah all night u cool?-

- yeah im cool-
 

“Just one more bite, okay? You have one more, and then I’ll have one more, and we won’t tell mom.” Hanbin whispered conspiratorially to his sister, who was staunchly refusing to finish her breakfast. 

She looked between him and her plate, sighing loudly. “Okay.” She picked up her fork and filled it with one last bit of her food, unhappily eating it before handing her fork to Hanbin, who quickly shovelled the rest of it into his own mouth seconds before their mother entered the room. 

“Ah that’s horrible, is she okay?” 

Hanbin chewed the food quietly and watched his mom, who had a worried look on her face. He swallowed the food and looked down at Hanbyul, passing her a napkin to so she could wipe now that she was finished eating. 

“She’s going in on Monday? Oh so soon, that’s good, but we should come and see her. Do you have room for us? Are you sure? We could get a hotel room, it wouldn’t be a problem. Okay, well, we’ll see when we’re there. Thank you for calling me, I’ll call you later today, okay? Yes, I love you too, give her my love and tell her I’ll see her tomorrow.” 

He kept his questions to himself until she hung up. “What’s wrong? Is someone sick?” 

“My mother,” she answered him, looking at him and trying to keep her expression somewhat guarded, “she, well, she’s in the hospital. She’s okay, but we should go and see her.” 

Hanbin met her eyes, could see there was more she wanted to say, but was wary of saying it in front of Hanbyul. “Are we going to see her this weekend?” 

“I know you need to work on that project for your chemistry class, sweetheart, so you don’t have to come, but I’m going to go, at least. I’ll take Hanbyul too, your grandmother will want to see her.” 

“I can stay by myself, it’s no problem,” Hanbin offered, sure that the situation wasn’t so dire that death was a concern. His mother wouldn’t offer to let him stay here for school if that was the case. 

“I’m sure she’ll be fine, she has to have a visit with her doctor on Monday.” 

Hanbin nodded, could see the seriousness in her eyes. His grandmother had a minor heart condition, nothing truly troubling, but now that she was getting older, they were always more concerned. “I’m sure she’ll be okay, she’s tough, isn’t she, Byul?” 

Hanbyul nodded, not understanding the full scope of the situation. “Are we going to see her? She was just here.” 

Their mother nodded, smiling softly at Hanbyul. “Yes, she was, but she’s not feeling well and she wants to see you. You’ll make her feel better with a visit.” 

“But oppa isn’t coming?” Hanbyul pouted at Hanbin. 

“I have a project for school I have to finish,” he said, leaning down to kiss her, “otherwise I’d come too.” 

“Okay.” Hanbyul agreed with no further fuss. 

“Byul-ah, I put your outfit for today on your bed, can you and go and change please?” Hanbyul nodded and leapt down from her chair, running off to her bedroom. 

“Are you sure I don’t need to come? I can get an extension, my chem teacher likes me.” Hanbin was up out of his chair and in front of his mother, worried expression meeting hers. 

“Oh sweetie, all your teachers like you,” she , “but really it’s okay. It’s just a routine operation we’ve been expecting, it’s just coming a bit sooner than we thought. It’s nothing to worry about though, okay?” 

“If it’s nothing to worry about, then why are you going to see her?” Hanbin knew she wouldn’t lie to him about the severity, but he was still concerned. 

“Ah, I’m just feeling worried and a little sentimental, I guess it’s a mom thing.” She replied before kissing his cheek. “Thank you for being worried, though. If you hadn’t just seen her this past weekend for your birthday, I’d probably ask you to come. But really, she’ll be fine. Besides, I’m sure you won’t mind having the weekend to yourself, right? You do have that project to finish.” 

Hanbin nodded, though his mind wasn’t just on the project. He couldn’t help but think about Bobby. Would his mom object if he asked her about Bobby staying over? Should he ask? Bobby’s parents might not even let him, so he shouldn’t get too excited yet. 

“Yeah, you’re right. Make sure you give her an extra hug for me, okay?” 

“I will, and I’ll call you so you can talk to her, okay? I’m sure she’d love to hear your voice.” 

“Okay, thanks mom.” Hanbin gave her a hug before sitting back down at the table to finish his own meal. But first he picked his phone up, sending a text to Bobby. 

-hey hyung, parents are taking byul and going to stay with my grandma this weekend, you wanna come over and keep me company?-

Bobby’s reply was immediate. 

-yeah iwill!!! when can i come?-

Hanbin smiled at his response, but just needed to make sure his intentions were clear. He’d been thinking about it, about how the time was right. When would he possibly get another opportunity like this, being alone for a weekend? 

-saturday evening, i have a chem project i need to finish first. but you can stay all night, right?-

-u mean that?? really all night?-

-yeah all night :)-

-ok im there!! u sure its ok?-

-yeah its cool-

He hadn’t asked, but he knew his mom would probably expect it. He never went more than a few days at a time without his parents telling him that they trusted him to make good decisions for himself. He was responsible. He knew what he was getting into. They’d trust that. 

-ok then i will see u tomorrow :))))-

-tomorrow ♥-