Their conversation that night, Yuta didn't exactly know where it went. They haven't disclosed anything, like, is Taeyong mad at him for yelling?

But maybe that wasn't the case because the moment he told him to stay, Taeyong looks at him blankly before nodding and placing the books he was holding back to the desk.

Yuta felt so embarrassed when Taeyong smiled at him that he heads to the restroom while awkwardly wiping his tears.

Yuta can hear Taeyong's little snores as he watches him sleep. He's drained but he couldn't doze off no matter how much he tries. He felt regretful at his best. He knows how unfair it was to talk behind Winwin's back the way he did. Winwin doesn't deserve a friend like him, someone so miserable and pathetic, the younger deserves someone better. Although he couldn't quite understand why Taeyong simply threw off his concern regarding his image, but threw the blame on him instead.

He feels sorry that Taeyong had to look back and feel at fault again all because of his childish prattle. He should've believe that Taeyong isn't that child who calls anyone who is lanky a anymore, nor who vocalize his disgust when he sees gay couples.

It's only been 2 months with him after almost 2 years that they haven't been together, and Taeyong showed him how much he's change. And yet, it's who Yuta doubts him the most.

"N--no. It's not that." Yuta mutters to himself.

Yuta is just afraid to admit it, that the way Taeyong and him used to be, isn't the same anymore. Back then, Taeyong was the only person who he's most comfortable to be with, but now he always get tendencies to tiptoe around him. Or if from before if there's something in his mind he couldn't tell anyone but Taeyong only, now, the last person Yuta wants to know what he's thinking was Taeyong.

He'd like to think of it was the distant or how much they grew up in a few years of seperating. He wonder if Taeyong feels the same.

And yet, Taeyong is just there beside him and that's all he wanted.

If there is anyone in his life he feels most comfortable now, it's Ten. They hadn't been friends for long but they just clicked. Some of their friends even say they're a total opposite, since Ten is someone so rowdy while Yuta is quiet. They get a long a lot having many similar interest.

But Yuta believes they get along only because the two of them have a lot of worries. They know each other's stories and relies on each other a lot if they need someone to talk to. Like right now, he told Ten about his little fight with Taeyong from last night.

"You cried? What a ." Ten laughed. "Why did you?"

Yuta groaned and burries his face on his desk. "I don't know. Maybe because he seemed so mad. And I feel regretful already...about Winwin too."

Ten snorts. "So you sounded like a homophobe? How ironic."

Yuta hits him on the back of his neck.

"You actually thought he'd stay away if you tell him that. Nice try." Ten claps his hand sarcastically.

"That's not what I'm---"

"Oh then what. Then what. Huh." Ten made a face and chides.

It's not like that, he wants to tell Ten. But the younger is being annoying so he only shook his head and look away. By the time they stopped talking, Doyoung who's sitting a row ahead of them looked at Ten. Doyoung doesn't really care whatever they're talking about anyway.

"Hey did you really apply on moving to our dorm?"

Ten hummed. "Yeah, did I get an approval?"

"You're moving? Why?" Yuta asked.

"Well, the owner of our dorm now said she'll give me a week to move out. They have lame and strict regulations. How annoying." Ten says sadly.

"Curfew time is 10pm." Doyoung informed him.

"W---what? That's even worse!" Ten stuttered.

Yuta laughed. "Tell your dorm owner to approve his papers. Let him move there. He needs to behave." He tells Doyoung.

"Yuta hyung!" Ten whined in panic.

"Like where do you go at night?"

"To your house when Taeyong comes over to study." Ten muttered, rolling his yes.

"Bring it on." Yuta challenged.

He watched Taeyong open the door and took the box from the delivery man. They both know what it is, Taeyong's sister messaged them about it.

Their neighbors will scold time sooner, Yuta thinks. They've been sneering one another for a good hour now, like how they used to when they play video games. Who doesn't get excited playing Tekken? It's funny the way Taeyong jibes at him for being a loser at playing, like the way he did years ago.

"Yuta, after all these years you're that unskilled player that deserves to be reported for being too boring!"

Yuta puts his joystick down. "Don't think too highly of yourself, I'm only letting you win."

Taeyong paused the game and literally crossed his arm. "Excuses! And why would you do that, huh?"

Yuta smiled cheekily and draws near Taeyong to pinch his cheeks. "Because you are so cute and I love you that much!"

"Coming from someone with chubby cheeks!" Taeyong retorts with a laugh and reach out to pinch Yuta's cheeks too instead of prying.

"Huh." Yuta deemed offended. "Why would you say that."

They let go of each other's face and Taeyong is laughing hard. That baby picture of Yuta in yellow looking so plump is clear on his mind and never leaving like a tattoo. He avoided teasing Yuta about it because the younger gets upset easily.

"I'm going to put it as my wallpaper again " Taeyong says and fished out his phone from his pocket.

Yuta couldn't hide the pout on his face and he knows Taeyong wouldn't let him live this time, considering how much he'd make fun of the older when he's sulky. He stood up to leave but Taeyong followed suit and held him on the wrist.

"Hey."

"Hyung, that wasn't funny." Yuta says.

Taeyong sighed and grasped his wrist tightly causing Yuta to stop on his tracks. "Don't be mad, I'll do anything. Please."

Taeyong knew better than making him upset. The last time he made fun of Yuta's baby picture was 5 years ago, the younger didn't talk to him for weeks.

Yuta stopped to look at him and asked, "Really?"

Taeyong nods and waits.

"Kiss m--" He hadn't finish yet and he already received a jab on his stomach. "Aw, Taeyong! It hurts!" He says crouching.

Taeyong only rolled his eyes.

"It hurts to much!" Yuta says dramatically. "I can't feel my legs, help me!"

A chuckle escaped Taeyong's lips becuase Yuta is acting funny. He held him up by hugging him tight. "I though you were manly."

"I am. And I need a ki---"

Taeyong used his hand to push Yuta's face away from him. "Okay, that's enough. Message noona and tell her you enjoyed the game even if you still at it."

Yuta didn't want to pull away when Taeyong did, so he hugged Taeyong instead. "It's so cold." He fakes a shiver.

"You're even sweating."

Ten asked for Hansol's opinion whether or not he should do it and even asked the older to accompany him in case things go berserk. They found Yuta seated on the bench under the tree, reading a book. It's a funny sight, they all know he's faking it.

"Hey I have one favor to ask of you. I know you'd say no but---"

"You're still going to ask?" Yuta finished for him. Moving to gesture Hansol to sit.

Ten nods sadly. "A lot of dancers got injured and left the cheering squad." The younger starts but Yuta is already looking away as if it was the worst idea ever. "P--please, Yuta hyung. We need more people. Please, it will help your grades. You want to improve your biology, right?"

Ten clinged to him like a koala and Yuta literally pushed him away. "Ten, of all things. That's the worst idea you ever come up wi---"

"He's right." Hansol says, making the two boys look at him. "You shouldn't have thought of that. That will make Yuta and everybody uncomfortable."

"You should've told me that earlier though." Ten told Hansol and sighed. "But I got another idea."

"Stop wasting Hansol hyung's time, Ten."

"No....." Ten shook his head. "This one's the best. I'm asking Taeyong hyung. He will join, won't he? Is that okay?"

Yuta looks at him. "Why are you asking me? Shouldn't you be asking him?"

Ten teasingly smiled at him before getting up and pulling Hansol, shoving his two thumbs up annoyingly to Yuta's face who dismissed everything by closing his eyes.

"I'm so bright. Taeyong hyung loves me, he won't say no." Ten says once Yuta was out of sight.

"It's your fault. Not everyone can dance like you. You made the choreography so complicated and now everybody is injured." Hansol shook his head. It's the main reason why they rejected Ten too when they asked him and Johnny to join. "Make sure Jaehyun and Taeyong doesn't get hurt."

Ten raised his right hand. "I promise. Well....it has to be impressive, right?"

"Yuta. He has yet to get over right?" Hansol says. "What's impressive is how you two can keep your friendship despite that."

"Hyung." Ten placed a hand on Hansol's back. "If that was the case, Yuta hyung and I might be in bad condition. But I'm afraid it's not. I think."

Hansol gave him a look. "She still likes Seulgi, right? Johnny and I were talking about it last night. He feels bad for Yuta."

Ten raised his hands in defense. "Eh!! I'm not doing anything. She asked for help on the cheering, that's all."

Hansol nods in understanding. "Just don't make Yuta more upset, okay? He doesn't look alright lately."

Ten promises him he won't.

=>From: Winwinnie

Tae-hyung.... Let's study at the library later plssss I didn't understand today's lesson

To: Winwinnie

Okay I'll see you later :)

=> From: Winwinnie

YAYYYY <333

Taeyong couldn't cope as to why Yuta had to joke about Winwin being gay. Yuta may seemed like he's quiet and nice, but knowing Yuta for years, he knew the younger had issues on speaking for having a sharp tongue. He would talk to his parents on the phone so rudely, with the tone shoving on their throat how much he doesn't want to talk to them.

He didn't get why Yuta hates Winwin so much. Maybe the younger is talkative, Yuta doesn't like anyone who talks a lot, but if so, then why is he fine and even close
to Ten.

Taeyong really liked the idea of taking care of someone, and it may seemed funny but he thinks of Winwin as Ruby, they are both adorable and clingy. And he seemed to enjoy his company too.

Back then, Taeyong was sure that Yuta enjoyed being around him. He also took care of Yuta like a younger brother he never had. But now, he isn't sure if Yuta still likes that kind of attention anymore.

Winwin was sleeping on the library and smiled brightly when Taeyong nudged him awake. Lending him his notes first so Winwin could copy.

"Winwin are you..."

"Gay?" Winwin looks at him. "I don't know. Maybe. I guess. Yeah."

Taeyong shyly nods in understanding. He shouldn't have asked that, but curiosity kills.

"I just don't find girls interesting no matter how pretty they are." Winwin laughed. "Hyung. What about you? Are you gay?"

"N-no!" Taeyong quickly says.

"Now, if you feel uncomfortable, you can tell me."

Taeyong was silent when he said that so Winwin assumed he was. Until Taeyong starts speaking again, he figured he was just thinking. Also, when Taeyong told him to ask for his help if he needs anything, is when Winwin felt relief.

Winwin is glad he found somebody as nice as Taeyong. It's like he found another brother who can take care of him, now that he can't be with his brother in China. But he's worried about what's bothering the older. It's not the first time the older just randomly gets quiet, it happened in many occassions he witnessed.

"Hyung, how long have you been friends with Yuta?" Winwin asked. The younger insist on walking him to the bus station.

"Ever since we were kids? His aunt owned a unit near the playground I always played at." Taeyong tells him.

"He's from Japan, right?"

Taeyong nods and smiled at the memory. "I only see him on Holidays, though. He was so fat, I liked making fun of him."

"You made fun of him?" Winwin burst out laughing.

"A lot. Then he moved in to live with his aunt, his parents are busy. He couldn't understand Korean much, yet I was still persistent on teasing him for being big. I wanted to make him cry but he just won't."

"Yuta hyung must really be tough, huh." Winwin laughed, imagining how fat baby boy Yuta looks like. The smile on Taeyong's face tells him it's priceless.

"He wouldn't notice me that I threw a snowball at him. He fell on the ground really hard, I felt so sorry that I was the one who cried. In the end, he's the one comforting me in broken Korean. It's still delightful to think about." Taeyong smiles at this. He doesn't think he will forget this memories with Yuta sooner. Especially, since that day, Yuta started talking to him.

"Then he studied in my school, we're the same grade but he's on a different class with other foreign students. He had language study after class and I wait for him every day and ask him to play with me. He'd ignore me a dozen of times though, before actually agreeing one day. When I asked him why he wouldn't want to play with me before, he just said "I don't want to make a mistake when talking to you. Now that my Korean is better, I want to talk and play with you everyday." Can you believe that?" He laughed.

Winwin has never seen Taeyong so talkative and engrossed to what he's saying. "You really like him, huh?"

"Of course I do." Taeyong tittered. "He was my first friend. All the kids hated me."

"Tell me more about you two." Winwin excitedly shook Taeyong's arm. Knowing the older's story will make him understand him more, and Yuta too.

"Well, throughout, I learned that Yuta is solitary. He doesn't really like talking a lot, also I was his only friend in class when we went to the same class the next years. I didn't want to let him be a hermit like I am. It saddens me to see him play soccer for the reason he kept on losing weight but when he said playing made him happy, I started supporting him. He's not in very good terms with his family, or his aunt, so he always sleeps over and will tell my mom that he didn't want to be scolded by his aunt. Mom liked the idea of me having a friend, so he's always welcome."

"He was your only friend too?" Winwin asked. "I see, that's why."

"Mom and noona likes him more than they like me, I was always jealous."

"You watched each other grow." Winwin says dreamily. It must've been nice to have someone like Taeyong in his life. Yuta is lucky, he thinks.

"People didn't liked me. Yuta helped me changed in many ways possible. He made me realize a lot of things."

"You don't fight?"

"Sometimes? Well, he's sensitive and messy."

"Tell me about your biggest fight."

"I made fun of him and his crush. He skipped school for a week and ignored me for a long time. I was so scared, I thought I was going to lose him." Taeyong fiddled at his pen. "We made up, then he got even, and made fun of me and my crush too. I was scarred for life."

"Then, what's your ideal type?" Winwin asked suddenly. A mischievous smile crossing his lips.

"Someone......" Taeyong thinks. "Who will stay with me. No matter what."

"Oh. Then Yuta hyung..."

"I heard my name." Yuta says and sat across them.

Taeyong was startled.

"Ten told me to give you this." Yuta hands Winwin a carton of milk.

"Thanks." The younger smiled happily.

"Can we go home? Seems like you two aren't even studying."

"Well we--we just finished." Taeyong says, packing his things.

"I'll wait for you outside, okay?"

"Okay."

The bus already left, so despite the rain, they had to walk home. They were sharing an umbrella, and the younger was holding it. The older had scold him enough as to why he wouldn't bring his own when the weather forecast already notified them to do so.

"I'm sorry, okay. I forgot." Yuta says for the nth time.

"We look stupid." Taeyong hissed.

Yuta only chuckled and wrapped an arm around him.

Taeyong is waiting for him to about what Winwin and him were talking about at the library. But it doesn't seem like Yuta is going to ask sooner, so he said "Winwin asked how you and I met."

"Did you tell him you were obsessed with me?"

"Oh was I." Taeyong rolled his eyes. "But you were so cute. What am I gonna do."

"Am I not cute now?" Yuta halts and pulls his face close to Taeyong, making a funny face.

"Where did you learn that." Taeyong groaned and pushed Yuta away.

"Hey." Yuta pulled Taeyong again. "You'll get sick again."

"You have no soccer game to miss."

"It breaks my heart when you're sick."

"You don't have a heart."

"It beats for you."

"What."

"I--I'm so hungry. Hyung."

Yuta tries to nap on the top of the bleachers. His back on the hard wall, with a book covering his face. Ten told him to meet there but the younger is late like the usual. He almost fell when someone pried the book from his face.

"Hey, do you wanna build a---"

"You made me wait for 20 minutes. What is it again, face."

"Hey it's only been 18 minutes." Ten whined, sitting next to him. "This is crazy, but.... Taeyong agreed to the cheerleading."

"Yeah I can see that." He says, squinting on the group of people that arrived at the field. It may be a little far but Taeyong is easy to distinguish.

"Wow." Ten exclaimed. "Also, I have nothing to do with this. But, Hansol hyung thinks you haven't gotten over Seulgi so he kind of talked to her."

"ing, he what." Yuta's eyes grew big.

"I don't know." Ten shrugs. "She didn't tell me the details but she asked me if I could get you to talk to her."

Yuta gave him a look.

"Come on, dude. You're not the only one affected here."

With a snort, Yuta muttered a "Fine."

"Wait here, okay." Ten grinned at him wide before running down.

Yuta sat there awkwardly and watches Seulgi coming towards him. He couldn't even look at her and all he want is for anything, maybe a fire alarm or an earthquake to ruin this moment. He stood up though, and bowed at her.

"Yuta...." Seulgi starts, her voice soft and quiet. "How have you been? We haven't speak for awhile."

It took all his strength to look her on the face. Her pretty face that never fails to make Yuta's heart flutter. "Well, I've been better. I'm sorry for avoiding you. It's just so embarrassing...What I did."

"I..I'm so sorry, Yuta."

"No, no." Yuta chides. "Don't say that. It's my fault. I shouldn't have jumped into conclusions of you liking me back just because you're nice to me. I'm sorry for ruining our friendshi---"

It's surprising that he wasn't stuttering, but he just couldn't speak anymore when Seulgi was wiping her tears in front of him. He figured it was another message sent, that's why he thinks he doesn't need to face her anymore. No matter how many apologies they'd exchange, he knew Seulgi would have the same answer. Although it hurts less, it still hurts to be rejected. But even if it does, he still used his hands to wipe her tears and hug her in his arms.

Yuta knows they can't have that friendship back. But it didn't matter that much anymore. She could be happier in Ten's company, and that would make Ten happy as well.

Taeyong talked to everyone in the cheerleading squad, especially Ten. He noticed him looking up and followed his gaze. He saw two figures hugging. It was Yuta, he couldn't be mistaken.

Anger seeps in to him when he remembers what Yuta told him that one time. That Ten and him likes the same girl, and that Ten was so serious about it. How can he stomach being affectionate with her in Ten's vision? When did Yuta become that cruel?

"Hyung, are you okay?" Ten asked him.

Taeyong wanted to ask him that, too.

Yuta awokens in the middle of the night. It's painful the moment he hears Taeyong crying. It was on the tip of his tongue to ask him why, but he couldn't. So instead, he wrapped an arm around Taeyong and says, "You look ugly when you cry."

Yuta regrets it immediately the moment he sets his foot at the rooftop because apparently, Ten saw him climbing up and followed suit.

"Man, I'm sorry about yesterday. I don't know what happened. But ." Ten told him. "You made her cry--"

"Taeyong." Yuta says. "Taeyong was crying last night."

"Oh. So did you asked him why, this time?"

He shook his head no.

"Tell me. What is it your so afraid of, huh? Why can't you ask him what's wrong? Is there anything you're afraid to know?"

Yuta only looks away. Indeed, he was afraid to know. Because like what Ten said before, Taeyong might be in so deep about her. And the idea of Taeyong falling in love to someone else, grinds to his ears. He doesn't even want to think about it.

"I really want to help you, man." Ten hissed. "But so long as you keep things to yourself, all I can do is rant . But if it's really what I think it is---"

"What do you think it is---"

"Don't ask. You know exactly what I'm thinking, nugget." Ten gestures him to stop talking. "It's either you go for it, or just get over it."

Yuta made himself believe that, it's just a funny thought, what Ten was thinking. This time he tries not to think much about what Ten says.

They were having dinner at their apartment when Taeyong suddenly asked "Did Jungwoo.... tell you anything?"

Yuta was taken at back at Taeyong's question. "N--no."

Taeyong looks down and nods.

"I-is there anything he needs to tell me?" The moment the question slipped out his tongue, it's upsetting to see the look on Taeyong's face. He shouldn't have asked that. "How are you doing at the cheerle---"

"I did something. In our school... I did something." Taeyong bit his tongue.

Yuta knew exactly it was the reason why Taeyong transferred here suddenly. He wanted to know, but at the same time, he doesn't. And yet he waits for Taeyong to speak.

"Dahyun.."

Yuta closed his eyes at the mention of the name.

"I forced her to have with me."

Yuta shakily lifts up the spoon he dropped. What the , he wanted to yell at Taeyong. Indeed Taeyong was a rascal, but doing something like this? Yuta found himself quiet because there wasn't a respond he could say to that.

"I blackmailed her." Taeyong corrected. "We-almost did it. But some--something happened. At some point, I'm glad I stopped...but....when the time came and I had to face my mistake.... I..."

Yuta's own hands were shaking the time he holds Taeyong's cold ones. If Taeyong did that much, what was he supposed to say?

"I can't face everyone on that school..anymore."

That confession was a shock to hear. He didn't imagine that it was to this extent, what mistake Taeyong had done. Taeyong had never disappoint him this much and yet, he'll hold his cold hands tighter than he could until Taeyong feels warm.

No matter how wrong Taeyong was, there's no way Yuta will leave him.

Not today.