[!!!!!!] Please listen to the song "The Stray" by City of Lions before reading so it will make more sense. Hehe

_

"Who says I'm going to explain this to him?" Yuta snorts, wiping his face on his sleeve. He has calmed down than the past minutes.

Ten looks sour, scratching his head.

"I shut up and you shut up. And you tell them that, too." Yuta negotiates.

"As if he's never going to find out." Ten rolled his eyes, turning around to leave.

"Yeah, you go ahead and side on them." Yuta dared, looking back at him.

"Nah, I'm just going to wait for you outside. Calm your ing , it's been worked up since earlier."

When Yuta gets back to class, he's pretty sure some of his classmates are whispering. Panic storms in him when there was knock in his classroom, his teacher opening it and saying;

"Mr. Nakamoto, someones outside for you."

He took little steps to the door, and he closed his eyes for what was coming next. Instead, though, Taeyong greets him casually.

"Hey I found it."

"F--found what?" He stuttered.

Taeyong removed the bookmark and showed the page to Yuta. "It's the Kotohiragu Shrine in Shikoku. It's surrounded by cherry blossoms too."

"O--oh." Yuta takes the book and pretended he was fascinated. "It's a long way from Osaka. But it won't be a problem since we can take the plane."

Taeyong beamed at him, that had Yuta smiling back.

"Actually, there's a Shrine too in Jeollanamdo that I want to visit, since the weekend is coming." Taeyong says, scratching the back of his neck. "Baekyangsa is 4 hours away from here... I ordered 2 tickets."

Yuta listens to him carefully.

"I mean, only if you wanna come with me. But if you don't want to, I'll just... Go alone." Taeyong looked sheepish when he says this.

Yuta was smiling like an idiot because Taeyong was talking comically and he's sure the older wasn't aware how endearing he looks.

"Of course, I'll come with you." Yuta says with a chuckle and he saw the glint in Taeyong's eyes.

"Really?" Taeyong asked, but without waiting for an answer, he continues "We can leave at 5 in the morning. So we can have an early lunch before we stroll to the temple. Then spend the night at a hotel nearby, I made a research for it already. Then we can go back on Sunday after noon."

"Oh, you got this all planned."

Taeyong nodded, smiling. "I even checked the weather."

"You even checked the weather." Yuta repeated.

Ten visits Winwin on their dorm he used to room with. The younger was so apologetic, not one bit mad at the person that caused his swollen face. Winwin told Ten that he feels sorry for Taeyong and even Yuta. He promised the younger that he well find a way for Winwin to talk to the two when it all calms down.

Then he moved to the next room and only Johnny was there. The older actually sent him a text and he's sure he's about to give him an earful.

"I've been letting it slip, how the two of you kept on poking fun of Winwin. But actually punching him, really? Ten?" Johnny stands tall, hands on his hips.

"Yeah you should tell Yuta that."

"No. I want to tell you this too. You even sided on him? You two are nothing different. How disappointing." Johnny says, raising his voice.

"I didn't side on him. I didn't side on anybo---"

"Liar!" Johnny shouts at him.

"No, listen to me." Ten back talks. He is just as frustrated as the other is. "I may have accompany him that time, but that doesn't mean I think what he did was right. All of you were against him already, and I didn't have to shove that on his throat. Yuta is our friend too. If he did something wrong, we have to help him to----"

"You still reason that out? And what is Winwin to us? You think it's just fine to hurt---"

"Hyung, the only reason why Yuta did that is because Winwin talked about Taeyong and Yuta didn't want anyone doing that!" Ten spits.

"You too, is someone who joke around too much. But when Winwin did it, over that one simple joke, he gets hit?"

"It's not just a simple joke, hyung. Yuta knew Taeyong for so long and we don't, so we will never understand how he felt towards it." Ten reasons.

"Don't make it seem like we're the ones who did wrong to him. He hit Winwin without thinking. And that's not something you do to a friend. Do you not understand?" Johnny scolds.

"The thing is, you're the one who don't understand. You don't know Yuta's feelings and so you will never understand what stimulates him to do that. When it happened, I left Yuta in the restroom to cry outside cos I felt so sorry for Winwin. I kept calling him to ask how he was." Ten bit his lip, he'll leave after this. "We don't know Taeyong as well, and did you think how it will make him feel when he hears that? I think that's all you need to know, hyung. I'm sorry for talking back. It's better if I leave now."

Johnny watches Ten leaves the door in awe.

Taeyong packed a few clothes for him and Yuta on seperate backpacks, including phone chargers, credit cards, and a few sweets in case they get nauseous on the bus.

When Saturday came, Taeyong woke Yuta up at 4 am. Their breakfast was well prepared when Yuta finished showering and they ate together. Taeyong making sure they bring everything and even fixed Yuta's hair, styling it up.

"You look better like this."

Yuta groaned. He prefers it when his hair is brushed down and thinks he looks funny otherwise. "You're the only one who thinks that."

"My opinion doesn't matter?" Taeyong asked. And was quick on brushing Yuta's hair down. He didn't want to argue this early.

"Brush it up the way you want to, hyung."

It was cold so they took the taxi to the bus station. They got there early and chose the third to the last row to sit. It was freezing and Taeyong pulled out two pairs of gloves from his backpack, putting them on on Yuta's hands. Yuta would've said Taeyong's hand is warmer than the gloves and he'd rather hold it, but he chose not to.

"I'm sorry. I shouldn't have pulled you on this nonse---"

"No, hyung. No." Yuta placed a hand on Taeyong's lap, and rest his head on Taeyong's shoulder. "Just let me sleep for awhile."

"No way. " Taeyong moves his body so he rocks Yuta on his shoulder.

"What is it?" Yuta asked sleepily.

"If you're going to sleep on me, what am I gonna do in four hours till we get there?"

"Sleep too."

"I can't just sleep on a public place."

"Even if I sing you a song?" Yuta asked. His head never leaving Taeyong's shoulder.

Taeyong looks at him and pulled away a bit when he noticed their proximity, and the way Yuta is looking at him. He wouldn't consider it a talent, but rather a gift. Yuta's voice was hauntingly ethereal. Taeyong imagines Yuta could go somewhere from this knack, but he loves to think he's the only person who's heard Yuta's wondrous voice.

Taeyong closed his eyes and rest his head on Yuta's the moment he hears him.

"Like the rain fall,

Hold on things are gonna get better

Everyone falls,

but I am never gonna let you stray

With you here

things will be

how I dreamt a story would be

Happy endings

Are a choice that we have to make.

You dont have to be empty,

I’ll hold you in my arms if you let me,

would you let me?

I’ll take you up on higher ground,

watch as the sun burns away the clouds.

You're weak,

you're lost,

and losing strenght

Take my hand I’ll keep you safe.

Open your eyes and see the bright

Stay with me,

you’ll be alright

I won't let you go

You don’t have to be empty,

I’ll hold you in my arms if you let me,

would you let me?

You dont have to be empty,

I’ll hold you in my arms if you let me,

would you let me?

How’s the view from the shoulders?

I’ll keep you safe, I won't let go

How does it feel to free those boulders ,

who strain around yourneck,

strain around your neck.

I will free your trials

You don’t have to be empty,

I’ll hold you in my arms if you let me,

would you let me?

I drove the extra mile"

The time Yuta finish is the exact time some passengers are climbing up the bus. He looks to his left to see that Taeyong is still wide awake. "That didn't work, huh?"

Taeyong smiles and closed his eyes. "It would be such a waste if I didn't hear it all."

Yuta is afraid that he'd redden visibly and pretends to cover his face with his gloved hand for warmth.

They passed through the pillar gate and walks along the pathway that leads up to the temple. The temple was completely surrounded by nature, giant colorful trees and a mountain ahead. It gave out the autumn vibe, along with the decorations ranging from yellow, orange and red.

They toured around and as much as he likes to see Taeyong smiling, he's been doing it for 2 hours and Yuta is worried.

"That should be hurting by now." Yuta says, using his one hand to clasp Taeyong's cheeks.

"Aw. What was that for?!" Taeyong whined. He's been taking pictures everywhere and he's completely fascinated by the colorful fishes and seashells at the lake that can be clearly seen. Crouching down close to the water.

"You've been doing that for hours." Yuta took Taeyongs phone. "Stand up."

"No." Taeyong insist. "Not my fault you're so unappreciative."

"I do. I'm just not as youthful as you."

"Yuta, what did you wish for? You prayed at the temple too, right?" Taeyong asked, his fingers playing with the water.

"I didn't." Yuta says. "Stand up, Taeyong. That water can be dirty."

"I'm sure it is. But I didn't wanna waste the opportunity to get close to them."

Yuta knows he's talking about the fishes that he literally facepalmed.

"Tell me what you wish for."

"Your sanity."

"Thank you."

Yuta mentally curses.

"I wished we wouldn't fight anymore." Taeyong tells him. "I wished I'd have more patience, and be more forgiving. So you wouldn't get angry at me."

"Taeyong, that's---"

"I knew you punched Winwin three days ago, and was waiting for you to tell me. I heard Winwin said something about me, that made you do that. I don't know what he said but I know you're not a bad person, Yuta. And you only did that for me." He tells him.

Yuta was lost for words. He didn't think Taeyong knew it and expected the older would be upset with him if he finds out. He already swallowed the thought that Taeyong will make him apologize to Winwin without even considering what went down. Taeyong has yet to even hear his part , and now he's taking his side. As shallow as it sounds, Yuta kept on wishing Taeyong will stand by him in front of Winwin's face.

"I don't wanna find out what he said about me. Neither I don't want you hurting him or anybody." Taeyong continued. "I think he is nearly always the subject of our arguments, and I have no right to force you to get along with somebody you don't want to. I'll stay away from him."

The last part had Yuta taken aback. He didn't think he'd actually hear it from him. He should be telling Taeyong to not go that far, but somehow it was satisfying. And he hoped Taeyong will stick to that promise. He believes if Taeyong avoids Winwin, then he'll have more time with him.

Yuta pulled Taeyong up on the arm and pretends to ignore what the older said, in case he comes back with a response that will make the topic unwieldy.

"I wished you'd be happy. Without worries." Yuta tells him, fixing Taeyong's jacket that was crumpled.

Taeyong smiled at him. "Thank you."

"Are you hungry?" He asked and Taeyong nodded.

"Let's check in to the hotel first."

"I'm so full. You didn't have to order all that." Yuta groaned and fell limply on the bed.

Taeyong laughed and sat on the other bed. "You didn't have to eat all that!"

"Are you going to sleep there?" Yuta lifts his head up.

"It's a single bed, we'll fall if we sleep together."

That didn't stop Yuta from standing up and climbing to the other's bed, Taeyong is just watching him while laughing.

"Hyung, I really think I ate too much. My stomach hurts." Yuta groans, pressing himself on the bed next to Taeyong.

"The next time I went on a travel, I'm never taking you again." Taeyong quipped.

"You only have me."

"I have Ruby." Taeyong threw a pillow on Yuta's back.

"Tell me that again when she doesn't run away anymore when seeing you."

"Hey, that's mean."

Taeyong was about to hit Yuta on the head but Yuta was quick to get up and pin him down, grasping on his wrists tight. He looked up to see the younger was staring sharply at him.

Yuta didn't exactly intent for them to get in this position. The whole idea was to simply dodge Taeyong's hit. He blames his hyper reflex. It didn't help when Taeyong his own lips and Yuta loosen his grip on the older's wrists. His hear racing rapidly that he closed his eyes when Taeyong pulled closer.

And Yuta received a painful smack on the chest, twice, that he fell from the bed.

"Go back to your bed. !" Taeyong yelled at him.

Slowly, Yuta gets up and limps his way there. "You're right. We can't fit on one bed." He managed to say despite tied tongue from the jitters.

"It'll be safe for the both of us."

Yuta was going to ask what he meant by that when the older speaks again.

"Don't think I forgot what you did to me that last time you were drunk." He snorts.

"O--oh that. What did I--do?"

They never speak about this. Yuta tends to forget what he's doing when he's drunk. It was all a blur in his head when he's sobber. And he's sure that one last time, he did something to Taeyong.

"You're even asking? I can't believe you." Taeyong huffed, facing the wall.

"Di--d I..... say something wrong?" Yuta asked, nervous.

"Die thinking."

Yuta purse his lips into a thin line, scratching the back of his head. Exactly he won't be able to sleep thinking about it. The next morning, he has dark circles under his eyes that Taeyong scolds him about and even called him ugly.

Yuta expected Taeyong will take him to a restaurant that sells sweets. He made Yuta ordered everything on the glass window, and the younger only settled with iced coffee and lasagna.

"If you eat sweets that much you look like Yakumo Oomori." Yuta says, Taeyong squints at him. "Jason. From Tokyo ghoul."

"Oh." Taeyong muttered and seeps on his caramel frappe. "Well I think I will look like the baby you with that yellow jumpsuit and fat cheeks."

Yuta literally kicked Taeyong hard under the table but immediately regrets it when the older wailed in pain. He forget it was Taeyong's shin and not a soccer ball.

"What the. Taeyong, are you okay?" He runs to him and about to place a hand where Taeyong was hurt but got pry away.

"Don't touch me. You're so cruel." Taeyong writhe, tears forming in his eyes.

"Oh my god what did I do." Yuta voiced out what was in his head.

The atmosphere was awfully quiet, Yuta is just lost for words kneeling in front of Taeyong and just watching him wipe some tears. It went on for a good 5 minutes until Taeyong starts eating again and Yuta goes back to his seat.

"Are you still hurt? Are you mad?"

Taeyong didn't say anything. He didn't say anything either when they walk back to their hotel, even on four hours bus ride back to Seoul.

On a Monday morning, Taeyong made it a point that he's still mad when he phone called Winwin in front of Yuta and tells Winwin to meet at the bus station. And even left him eating breakfast alone.

He can finish his favorite frosted flakes in thirty seconds, but now even one flake that was completely sagged by milk is hard to swallow. So he calls Ten instead.

They meet at a convenient store close to Ten's new dorm. And waits for the younger to finish eating his extreme large cup of ramen.

"What is it again? I thought you do had a good time visiting a shrine?" Ten yawned. It's still so early to deal with Yuta's issues.

"I kicked him he got mad."

"You should've just punched him instead. Man, you kick like the Annie Leonhardt." Ten burped.

"He broke his promise." Yuta says. That night they went at Baekyangsa, he messaged Ten everything Taeyong told him. "He phonecalled Winwin in front of my face."

"Well, ." Ten yaps.

"He's starting to ing annoy me." Yuta palmed his face, sliding them up to pull at his hair. He's so ing frustrated that he can physically feel his angry heart.

Ten had no idea what to say either, so he just placed a hand on Yuta's back. "It'll get better soon, man."

"I knew him coming here is never a good idea." Yuta suddenly blurts, it tastes like a lie in his tongue but he wants to believe it. He's angry.

"Man, don't say that."

Yuta fished out his ringing phone from his pocket. Taeyong's name flashed on his screen, calling. He didn't reject nor ignore, but rather set his phone on airplane mode.

"Why didn't you answer?"

He knows exactly what going to come out of Taeyong's mouth. He probably found out he skipped school already. Taeyong will scold Yuta and pretends nothing happened.

"He's just going to act like everything is fine. But now cos I'm still ing pissed."

Now it's Ten time top pull out his ringing phone. "Great, he's calling me now."

"Don't ing answer."

It was pastnight when Yuta gets home. He's so drained and hungry. This time, Ten and him opts to kill time on arcade and online gaming instead of drinking. After last the incident last time, he swore to never do it anymore. His head hurts from staring too much on computer screen.

What Yuta didn't expect was a worried Taeyong greeting him the moment he opened the door.

"Yuta, have you eaten?"

Yuta is still has the sullen look on his face he's been wearing since morning. Taking off his shoes, he walked pass Taeyong.

"Are you tired? Did you eat?" Taeyong followed him.

He busy himself finding clothes in his drawer, overtly rummaging through the clothes for Taeyong to see. Yuta bolts to the restroom because the older is still on his back, talking nonsense. He made sure to take some time in the shower.

Yuta carefully flops on the bed next to Taeyong. He guesses the older would stop pestering it. Besides, he made it a decision to ignore him anyway.

What surprised him was Taeyong hugging him from the back. Yuta is determined to made his point, that he lifts the olders off him. The fifth time it happened, Taeyong clutches on his shirt tight.

Yuta still pry him away though, and when it didn't work, he pretends to pay no need and covered his face with a pillow. When he feels Taeyong inches closer, his mind went blank.

Yuta thinks he can't ignore Taeyong afterall.

 ____

 it hurts that u've been indirectly picking holes in my writings becos I respect u as an author so much